Talk to me like the sea
by undyingflower
Summary: One year has passed and all is well in Storybrooke: Emma and Killian are living together; Regina and Robin are engaged; David and Mary Margaret are living their happy ending ... but this is Storybrooke and a little boat trip can change everything. Prepare for big questions and big changes. [Set one year after the events of season 4-5. Some things will diverge from season 5.]
1. a little pirate in you

**Note: Robin Hood's wife (Marian) did not come back to life. Kilian was never the Dark One.**

**Set one year after the events of season 4-5. Some things will diverge from season 5.**

_One year has passed and all is well in Storybrooke: Emma and Killian are living together; Regina and Robin are engaged; David and Mary Margaret are living their happy ending ... but this is Storybrooke and a little boat trip can change everything._

_Prepare for big questions and big changes._

* * *

_Of all the liars in the world, sometimes the worst are our own fears_ _―_ Rudyard Kipling

* * *

**One year later**

Emma slowly opened her eyes as the morning sun streamed in through the window. The sound of the waves crashing down on the soft sand outside the balcony door made her smile. It's been almost a year since they bought the house and Emma couldn't think of a better place to live with the men of her life.

Henry was the one who found the house after weeks of searching in the newspaper for the perfect place. He wanted a place by the water with a view but none of the apartments seemed good enough. Then one morning at Granny's he saw the picture of the house and everything changed.

The house was near the beach with three bedrooms but only the main bedroom had a balcony with a view to the ocean.

Emma loved her bedroom; the walls were painted a pale yellow and there was a king size bed with a headboard and matching nightstands in the center of the room.

The house was white with blue shutters with a living room overlooking the sea; there was also a big porch wrapped around the whole house perfect to watch the sun go down.

Emma closed her eyes again and rolled over, stretching her arms with the hope of find her pirate sleeping by her side but all she could find was empty sheets. She sat up to look around the room. Killian was nowhere in sight. She felt her heart sink a little. Since they moved on this was the first time that she woke up without him by her side and she didn't like the feeling, it was like half of her was missing.

She liked the feeling of waking up every morning knowing that she was not alone anymore. She liked the rare times that she woke before him and stood in silence memorizing every line of his face; contemplating the way his breath come out and soft and how he looked younger when he was asleep. But most of the times he was the one who stayed in silence staring at her; waiting for her to wake up; meeting her with kisses and romantic words.

Emma got out of the bed. The house was quiet as she made her way down the stairs. She paused at the end of the stairs when she heard a sound. She found him the moment she walked into the living room.

"Killian…" – she said with a trembling voice. She could not believe in what her eyes were seeing; Killian was on the couch packing some clothes; she could also see another bag already full on the floor – "I, I … what … I don't understand … Why?" – Emma asked, trying to hide the tears in her eyes.

"Emma, what's wrong?" – Killian asked concerned, getting up from the couch.

"Why are you leaving?" – she said trembling – "I thought we were fine … I thought …"

"You're not making any sense, love" – Killian said, trying to sound calm.

"I'm not making any sense?" – she exclaimed – "This doesn't make any sense!" – Emma said, pointing at the bags.

"But we've already talked about this" – Killian said confused – "It's just for a few days…"

"A few days? I, I don't … What are you talking about?" – Emma said, trying to calm herself.

"The trip I planned a month ago with David and Robin" – he said approaching her – "Don't you remember?"

"The trip with David and Robin" – Emma said so low that if Killian weren't just a few inches from her he wouldn't have heard her.

"Love, what's wrong?" – Killian asked, cleaning the tears on Emma's face with his hand – "If you don't want me to go …"

"No, it's not that" – Emma interrupted him – "I just … I, I … I woke up and you weren't there, and you are always there, and then I saw you here packing and, and …" – she babbled.

"Listen to me, Emma" – Killian said cupping her face, making her meet his gaze – "I promise you, I'm not going anywhere" – he said caressing her face, making her smile – "at least not more than a few days" – he said with a smile.

Emma stood on tiptoe so she could reach Killian's lips and kissed him gently.

"I'm sorry … I don't know what's wrong with me …" – she said resting her head on Killian's chest – "I just freaked out. It's like I'm on a roller coaster of emotions or something"

"No need to apologize, love" – he said, caressing her hair – "So, will you help me packing the rest of the things?"

"It's Saturday morning and you are already packing, isn't the trip just tomorrow after lunch?" – she asked smiling.

"Well, you know what they say about preparation and all of that" – Killian said booping Emma's nose.

* * *

Emma and Killian were the last ones to arrive at Granny's.

Mary Margaret, David, Regina and Robin were already seated at the table waiting for them while Henry and Roland were playing together one of the many games of the game machine on the corner of the restaurant; Neal was on Henry's lap.

After all the bad events that occurred in the past, Storybrooke was a safe place again and every Sunday the Charming Family met at Granny's for a family lunch or dinner.

"We apologize for the delay" – Killian said with his typical grin, taking his seat next to David.

"What took you so long?" – Regina asked noticing the exchanging looks between Emma and Killian – "Wait! I don't want to know"

Noticing the raised eyebrows on David's face Emma spoke:

"Killian wanted to spend the Saturday morning packing" – she explained.

"You've already packed?" – David asked – "The trip is just tomorrow night"

"Tomorrow afternoon" – Killian corrected him.

"Did you convince Leroy to lend us the boat?" – Robin asked.

"Aye, in exchange for some navigation lessons" – Killian explained. The dwarf was very reluctant but he finally agreed when Killian told him about the navigation lessons.

"Is that thing safe?" – Regina asked suspicious.

"Yes, I've already checked the boat" – Killian assured her.

"Of course you did" – Emma murmured, rolling her eyes.

"However it's the speed we should be concern with" – Killian stated – "The boat is slower than a snail"

"I'm sure it's not that bad" – Mary Margaret gently said, looking at Killian – "Everything will be alright" – she said smiling.

"I hope so" – Killian said, trying to hide his nervousness as he exchanged a look with Mary Margaret.

The three couples and the children continued to talk during their meal.

Regina and Robin were engaged for almost a year and the wedding would be in a few weeks. They were living in Regina's house. Henry used to spend the nights with them two weeks per month; Roland and he were very close and acted like true brothers.

Neal had almost two years and blonde hair like her father and sister although he already knew how to walk he just learned to say a few words like: mommy, daddy, ball, cup, and surprisingly Killy. Everybody laughed at Neal's attempt of saying Killian's name.

Suddenly Killian noticed that Emma had barely touched her food or talked during their meal.

"Emma, love …" – he softly said, catching her attention– "You barely touched your plate" – he added.

"I'm not hungry" – Emma said, playing with her fork.

"But at home you said you were starving" – Killian stated.

"Yeah … I know … I think the smell of the food is making me a little bit nauseous" – Emma noticed the concerned look on Killian's face and added – "Don't worry. I probably ate too much at breakfast"

"I noticed" – he teased.

"Hey!" – she said, hitting him playfully on the arm.

"A plate of waffles, eggs, bacon and a piece of pie" – Killian said – "Did I miss something?" – he arched an eyebrow at her.

"A cup of coffee" – Emma replied, narrowing her eyes.

"Aye; a plate of waffles, eggs, bacon, a piece of pie and a cup of coffee" – Killian repeated adding the cup of coffee.

"Is this your nice way of saying that I look fat?" – Emma asked with a serious tone.

"What?" – Killian asked surprised – "Of course not, love" – he quickly said noticing the worry in her eyes. Before he could say anything else Emma got up from her seat and ran to the bathroom.

"What happened?" – David asked when he noticed the way her daughter rose from her seat.

"I, I don't know" – Killian managed to say, before following her to the bathroom, leaving all people at the table speechless.

When he reached the bathroom he noticed that the door was locked.

"Emma, love? What's wrong?" – he asked, resting his head on the bathroom door.

He heard a little noise but no one spoke. He waited in silence with his hand hovering over the door knob when suddenly it turned under his hand and the door opened.

"Emma?" – he asked stepping into the room. He couldn't see her face only the reflection of her back in the bathroom mirror but before he could say anything she turned her body to him. He immediately noticed her red eyes and felt his heart sink – "I'm so sorry love, I didn't mean to upset you" – he said, reaching for her hand and twining their fingers together.

She rested her head on his chest and spoke:

"No, don't say that" – she tried to say without start crying again – "I'm the one who should apologize. I don't know why I reacted the way I did. I just had this need to cry and …"

Killian placed a small kiss on the top of her head, trying to calm her down.

"Shhh… Everything is fine" – he softly said – "We're fine"

"I know" – Emma said, wrapping her arms around his body.

* * *

Once home, Killian and Emma decided to watch a movie. They were lying on the couch when Killian got a call from Robin asking to meet him at the docks. He placed a goodbye kiss on Emma's lips and rose from the couch.

Emma decided to finish watching the movie. She lay down on the couch but before the movie end she made her way to the kitchen as fast as she could. She ran to the sink throwing her head over to vomit. After throwing up all her breakfast Emma quickly cleaned the mess she made. She covered her face with her hands trying to process what just happened.

_Was she sick? No. She felt fine. Yes, she had lost her appetite at Granny's and yes she admitted that lately she was a little bit emotionally vulnerable but she felt fine._

She went to the bathroom to brush her teeth but when she opened the bathroom closet she almost lost her balance.

Oh my God – she murmured when she saw her sanitary pads and tampons.

It has been two months since she used them. How could she did not notice? She sat on the bathroom floor. _This could not be happening, not now; it was too soon; how would he react?_

Suddenly, memories of how Neal left her and how she gave Henry away invaded her mind. The trust issues that have been replaced these last years by happiness and love appeared again.

She rose from the floor and looked at herself in the mirror trying to calm herself. Killian and Henry would return soon and notice that something happened to her if she not calm down. She took a deep breath and washed her face.

_I can do this_ – she said to herself – _Besides, I don't even know if I'm really … _– she gulped.

Two hours passed when Killian and Henry returned home.

Emma tried to act normal during dinner but once more she barely touched her food. Henry told them about what Roland and he had done during the day and their plans for the rest of the weekend.

They sat together in the living room and watched TV before Killian put Henry to sleep with one of his stories from Neverland.

Emma watched them from the door frame in silence. She could see the big smile on Henry's face as he listened to Killian's story which made her smile too; she instinctively put her hand on her belly and slipped into her bedroom.

Once in her and Killian's room she climbed to bed and waited for him. Minutes later she saw him entering the room and making his way towards her. They settled into a comfortable position, he on his back and she curled against his chest.

"What's bothering you, Emma?" – Emma heard him ask. She felt his lips brushing the back of her hair lightly and raised her head a bit, faking a confused look – "Open book, remember?" – Killian said, looking at her.

"I remember" – she said with a smile. Killian waited for her to continue – "I'm worried" – she murmured.

"About what, love?" – he asked with concern. Emma stood in silence for a few seconds trying to figure it out if she should tell him or not.

"The trip" – she said not telling the whole truth – "What if something goes wrong? It could be dangerous… I, I don't want to lose you" – she finished the sentence so low that she wasn't sure if he had heard her.

"You're worried about me?" – Killian said with a smile – "Love, I'm a pirate remember?"

"So?" – Emma asked, staring at him, raising her eyebrows.

"So you don't need to worry. I'll be back before you even notice" – he said.

"I'm glad there are no mermaids in this world" – Emma stated, resting her head on his chest.

"Afraid that I could be kidnaped by one?" – Killian teased.

"Funny" – she said – "I would have saved you"

"I know" – he said softly.

"Oh really?" – Emma said, turning her head in his direction again – "How can you be so sure?"

"Because I know there's a little pirate in you, Swan" – Killian said, smiling – "And you wouldn't miss the chance to kick some mermaids' ass, or tails" – he added.

Emma almost forgot how to breathe when she heard Killian's words. She remained speechless, meeting his beautiful blue eyes and memorizing once again every line of his face. She could feel tears appearing in her eyes.

"I love you" – she murmured, curled against his chest.

Killian was usually the one who used to say it first. He was the one who had taught her how to say _I love you_ and really mean it; he was the one who had taught her how to say _I love you_ at least each month which was a progress since she was not used to say it at all until she met him.

"I love you too" – he said, wrapping his arms around Emma's body.

* * *

After making sure that Neal was asleep, Mary Margaret found David in the kitchen, drinking a large glass of chocolate milk.

"Did you pack your bags already?" – Mary Margaret asked, sitting next to her husband.

"No. The trip is just tomorrow night, honey" – David said – "I have plenty of time to do that tomorrow"

"Tomorrow afternoon" – she corrected him.

"You sound like Killian, honey" – David teased – "Besides it's just a boat trip"

"Yeah, but it's an important boat trip" – Mary Margaret said. She noticed the confused look on David's face and quickly added – "I mean, it's the first time that Killian, Robin and you do this kind of thing"

"I just hope that Killian knows what he's doing" – he said.

"Why do you say that?" – Mary Margaret asked.

"Boats are not really my thing. I prefer horses. What if we end up in the middle of nowhere? That boat is not exactly the Jolly Roger" – David said.

"You're going to be fine, just trust him. Killian knows what he's doing" – Mary Margaret stated.

"Why do I feel that you're trying to say something to me without really saying it?" – David asked, narrowing his eyes.

"Me? No …" – she lied, rolling her eyes – "Just promise me that you will be nice" – she said placing a kiss on his lips.

"I'm always nice. I'm Prince Charming" – David stated.

"My Prince Charming" – Mary Margaret said kissing him again.

* * *

When Emma woke up she turned on her side and as she opened her eyes the first thing she saw was a pirate gazing down on her. She hid her face in the pillow.

"How long have you been staring?" – she said after she let a small groan.

"Since I woke up" – Killian said, picking Emma's pillow from her face.

"How long have you been awake?" – Emma asked, raising her head a bit.

"A few minutes" – Killian said, lowering his head towards her, covering her lips with his own briefly.

"So, are you ready for your trip?" – Emma asked him with a smile.

"I think so" – Killian simply said.

"You think so?" – Emma asked, noticing his strange expression. She sat on the bed – "What's wrong?" – Killian remained in silence – "Are you nervous?" – she asked, without being able to hide a smile.

"Maybe" – he said, hiding his face with Emma's pillow.

"What happened to _I'm a pirate, remember?_" – she imitated him, removing the pillow from his face.

"I'm not worried about the trip … I mean, I'm worried about the trip, but not _the trip_" – Killian tried to explain.

"Okaaaay, you realize that I didn't understand a thing that you just said, right?" – Emma said. raising her eyebrows.

"It will make sense eventually, I hope" – Killian murmured.

* * *

After breakfast Emma decided to go talk to Mary Margaret. She needed to talk with someone about her worries; she needed her mom.

They were sitting on the couch, drinking some tea.

"Is Killian excited about the trip?" – Mary Margaret asked.

"Actually, I think he's nervous" – Emma said with a smile, drinking some of her tea.

"I bet" – Mary Margaret said without thinking. She noticed Emma's expression and added – "I mean, David looked nervous too" – she lied.

"You're lying" – Emma said, staring at her. Mary Margaret raised her eyebrows – "You're hiding something!" – she insisted.

"No, I'm not!" – her mother replied, avoiding eye contact.

"Yes you are! You know something!" – Emma insisted.

"What? I don't –" – Mary Margaret tried to say before Emma interrupted her.

"Whatever it is you have to tell me" – Emma retorted.

Mary Margaret took a deep breath before speaking.

"I can't" – she said finally.

Emma's eyes widened.

"So you're really hiding something!" – she exclaimed, glaring at her mother.

"What about you?" – Mary Margaret suddenly asked, trying to change the subject.

"Me? What do you mean?" – Emma said, trying to hide her anxiety.

"You wanted to talk, honey" – her mother softly said.

"Oh.. that … it's nothing…" – Emma said, faking a smile.

"Nothing with you means something" – Mary Margaret insisted.

Emma opened her mouth to reply but before she could say something she rose from the couch and ran to the bathroom.

She threw her head in the toilet to vomit barely noticing that Mary Margaret was right beside her.

"Emma …" – she said caressing her daughter's hair – "What's wrong? Are you sick?"

"I … I think … I think" – Emma started to say as she held her mother's arm trying to regain her balance. She could feel her eyes watering.

"Honey, please don't cry … just talk to me, please…" – Mary Margaret tried to calm her down.

"Mom …" – Emma said, looking into her mother's eyes – "I think I'm pregnant" – she said what she was too afraid to say to Killian or to anyone else.

Mary Margaret immediately wrapped Emma in a crushing hug.

"Oh my God Emma! I'm so happy for you" – she said, crying tears of happiness – "Tell me everything! Killian must be so happy! How did he react?"

Emma took a steep back, freeing herself from the embrace.

"I, I didn't tell him…" – she said moving away from her mother.

"What? Why not?" – Mary Margaret asked.

"I don't know, okay? I just … I don't know…" – Emma said, turning her body to her mother.

"Honey, you have to tell him" – she said, holding her hand – "He's going to be so happy" – she added smiling.

"I can't … I … What if he gets mad? What if he doesn't want this" – Emma sputtered – "What if he leaves…" – her voice barely a whisper.

"Emma, he loves you" – her mother stated with a big smile on her face.

"You don't get it! You're Snow White!" – Emma exclaimed, running a frustrated hand through her hair – "You were destined to have a happy ending!"

"Honey …" – Mary Margaret tried to speak.

"Everything was fine" – Emma said ignoring her mother's attempt to talk – "We were fine and now …"

"And now things will remain fine" – Mary Margaret said – "Trust me, Killian loves you and he will love you even more after you tell him"

Emma remained in silence looking at her mother, trying to find a lie in her eyes.

"I haven't done the test yet" – she said, breaking the silence.

* * *

Regina and Robin were having a quiet breakfast in their mansion. Henry and Roland were outside playing with fake swords, pretending to be the royal guard of the not so Evil Queen.

"You know you don't have to go, right?" – Regina said, picking a pancake from her plate.

"Go where?" – Robin asked confused.

"On this trip" – Regina said.

"Don't tell me you miss me already" – Robin teased.

"Actually …" – Regina said, leaning her head to him so she could reach his lips. After their brief kiss she spoke again – "We're about to get marry … I just don't want to be away from my fiancé"

"The trip is just for a couple of days" – Robin said, reaching for his glass of orange juice.

"Can't the trip be after the weeding?" – Regina suggested.

"I think it would be more difficult for me to go after we are married" – Robin teased.

"Yes, true" – Regina said with a smile – "Still, you could go camping in the woods it would be safer than going on a trip in a boat that can sink in the middle of the ocean"

"I was with Killian yesterday at the docks and the boat seemed fine" – Robin stated.

"Accidents happen" – Regina insisted.

"I'll be fine Regina besides, Killian almost begged me to go. I guess he's worried about David's reaction" – Robin said.

"David's reaction to what?" – Regina asked, raising her eyebrow, looking at him suspiciously.

_Damn it_ – Robin cursed himself.

"Nothing important" – he quickly said – "Do you want another pancake?" – he asked, trying to change the subject.

"We're not even married and you are already keeping secrets from me!" – Regina exclaimed.

"It's not a secret I just can't tell anyone" – Robin tried to explain – "Killian asked me to not tell anyone" – he added.

"I'm your fiancée!" – Regina retorted, slamming her hand against the kitchen table.

"But you're also Emma's friend!" – Robin replied.

He waited for Regina's complaint but when he looked at her she was with a devilish smile on her lips.

"No … Is he really?" – she said, breaking the silence.

"I have already said too much, haven't I?" – Robin said, laying his head on the table.

"I want to go too; I have to see David's reaction!" – Regina said enthusiastically.

"Sorry, men only" – Robin said – "And please calm down, you weren't supposed to know" – he added seeing Regina's enthusiasm.

"Please take the camera with you" – Regina said.

"So now you want me to go?" – Robin asked, raising his eyebrow.

"You definitely have to go!" – Regina said like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

* * *

Mary Margaret was waiting for Emma at the door of the bathroom. She was the one who had bought the pregnancy test to avoid the gossip. A few people had seen her buy the test and immediately asked her if she was expecting a baby again. She gave them short answers like: _You never know_ and _We will see_.

Mary Margaret rested her head on the bathroom door. Emma was in the bathroom for quite some time and she was starting to worry.

"Emma, honey? Is everything alright?" – Mary Margaret asked again.

There was silence and then suddenly the door opened. Emma slowly stepped into the hallway with the pregnancy test in her right hand. Mary Margaret noticed her red eyes and reached for her hand.

"Emma …" – she softly said – "What did the test say?"

"I don't know. I can't face this alone again" – Emma said, remembering the time she did the test when she was in prison.

"It's okay, honey. I'm here with you" – her mother said gently, squeezing her hand.

Emma took a deep breath and looked at the stick. Before Mary Margaret could open her mouth Emma let the test drop to the floor.

* * *

**English is not my native language (I'm Portuguese) so don't be too hard on me.**

**However if you happen to find any grammar mistake do let me know.**

**I really hope you all enjoyed the first chapter.**

**Thanks again for reading and please review. I would like to know what you all think. It means a lot to me.**


	2. changing the subject

_She was a compulsive pessimist, always looking for the soft brown spot in the fruit, pressing so hard she created it_ _―_ Amy Waldman

* * *

Before Mary Margaret could ask Emma what was the result of the pregnancy test, her daughter ran to the bathroom and slammed the door so hard that she was sure that the whole Storybrooke had heard it. Instinctively, she took a step in the direction of the bathroom but then she decided that she should her daughter some space; Emma was already too nervous. She turned away and picked the pregnant test from the floor. She didn't need to see the result to know why her daughter had reacted the way she did – Emma was pregnant.

Mary Margaret couldn't help but smile. She was going to be grandmother again; she was going to have a grandchild again. She didn't have the chance to help Emma during her first pregnancy but she was going to do that now. She couldn't believe how things had changed from the start. Her family was growing. Who would think that she and David would have another child? Who would think that her daughter would fall in love with a pirate? Who would think that soon they would … Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the front door opening. She quickly hid the pregnancy test and tried to act as normal as possible. She looked at the hall and saw David and Killian entering in the house.

"Where have you guys been?" – she asked approaching them.

"Just checking the boat one last time before the big trip" – David enthusiastically said – "Right, mate?" – he said, hitting playfully Killian's shoulder.

"Aye" – he softly said, trying to hide his anxiety.

"Wow, such enthusiasm!" – David ironically said – "What's going on Killian? You don't look like yourself" – he asked, narrowing his eyes.

"He's just tired, right Killian?" – Mary Margaret quickly said – "He planned this whole trip all by himself. Don't be so hard on him"

David looked at the two of them suspiciously.

"Speaking of planning things" – Killian said, breaking the silence – "Did you pack your things already?"

"Of course …" – David said not sounding very confident.

"Of course not" – Mary Margaret corrected him.

"What?" – Killian exclaimed – "We're leaving in a few hours and you haven't packed yet? Unbelievable" – he said, throwing his arms in the air.

Mary Margaret was trying not to laugh at Killian's reaction. Robin was right. They really looked like an old married couple.

She was glad that her Prince Charming had found a true friend. Before Killian, the only male friends that he had were the dwarfs but his friendship with Killian was different; they acted like brothers, like mates.

"Spoken like a man who doesn't have a toddler to chase around 24/7" – David replied – "I would really like to see you with a baby to look after and not being exhausted after a few hours" – Mary Margaret froze when she heard David's words.

"Don't blame little Neal for your lack of preparation" – Killian said, approaching the crib where Neal was sleeping – "He's the most peaceful baby I've ever seen" – he said, caressing Neal's hair – "Snow taught him well"

"Thank you for including me, mate" – David retorted.

"You're welcome" – he said with a smirk – "I'm sure Emma was nothing like her little brother" – he said gently, touching Neal's cheek – "Speaking of her, where is she?" – he asked, taking his eyes from Neal and turning his body. He saw Emma immediately. She was looking at him with a strange face.

"Emma, honey, where were you?" – David asked but Emma didn't hear him. She was still focused on Killian and the memory of him touching Neal with a big smile on his face. She had seen him playing with her little brother before but hearing him and David talking about babies and then seeing the way he looked at Neal made her heart race.

"She was in the bathroom" – Mary Margaret answered – "Right, honey?" – she added, touching Emma's shoulder.

"Right" – Emma murmured, shaking her head – "I had to go to the bathroom. What are you guys doing here?" – she asked, trying to compose herself.

"I live here, remember?" – her father replied. Emma looked at him with her _very-funny_ look – "The question is: what are _you_ doing here? Weren't we supposed to meet at Granny's?"

"Yeah, I know … but I knew that you and Killian would stop by to catch Mary Margaret and I thought we could go all together…" – she lied, trying not to sound too lame.

"Miss me already?" – Killian said, approaching Emma.

"Do you really have to ask?" – she said leaning her head to kiss him but before she could reach his lips David cleared his throat. Emma took a step back, moving away from Killian – "So, I heard that someone didn't have packed already?" – she asked, looking at her father.

"That's exactly what I'm going to do right now" – he said, making his way towards the stairs – "Honey, I think I'm going to need your help" – David said to his wife – "Can the two of take care of Neal for a few minutes?" – he asked Emma and Killian.

"Sure" – Killian said at the same time as Emma spoke:

"Why don't you take Killian with you?" – she noticed the confused looks on Killian and her father's face – "You love packing and David clearly needs help. Who better than you to help him?"

"Good point" – Killian said, kissing her forehead before following David.

Once Emma saw them disappearing from her view she let herself fall on the couch. Mary Margaret sat beside her.

Emma covered her face with her hands trying to calm herself. She knew that Killian would end up realizing that something was wrong with her no matter how hard she tried to act like nothing was wrong. She managed to fool him and her father but Killian was always able to read her like an open book – right from the start; she almost smiled at the memory of the first time he told her that – and sooner or later he would notice that something was not right; probably sooner than she thought.

"You have to tell him, Emma" – Mary Margaret's voice interrupted her thoughts – "You can't avoid this forever" – she said gently, grabbing one of her hands, giving her the pregnancy test.

"I know" – Emma murmured, looking at the result of the test for the second time before hiding it in the pocket of her jacket.

* * *

Robin and Regina were at Granny's waiting for the Charming's to arrive. The boys were outside the restaurant playing with each other like they usually did.

After their little talk at breakfast, Regina couldn't hide her devilish smile from her lips. Storybrooke was a small place and she was stunned that Killian managed to keep that little big secret for so long. She also wondered for how long Robin knew about that and instinctively looked at her engagement ring.

"You're supposed to act like you don't know about …" – Robin started to say which caught Regina's attention. She raised her eyebrow, faking a confuse look – "You know what I mean …"

"I really don't know what you're talking about" – she said smiling.

"Just don't bring that up" – he murmured so that the others clients at the restaurant didn't hear him – "Killian will kill me if you ruin his plan" – he said running his fingers through his hair nervously.

"I'm just curious. How long did you know about his intention to –"

"Regina!" – he cut her off.

"Sorry" – she said putting a hand in front of her mouth – "But how long did you know?" – she insisted.

"He told me a month ago" – Robin said.

"You knew it for a whole month?" – Regina exclaimed. Robin quickly looked around the room, making sure that no one else was listening their conversation – "How did you manage to keep this from me for that long?" – she said to herself out loud.

"Can we change the subject, please?" – Robin said.

"Killian wouldn't be able to keep this secret for so long without help" – Regina said ignoring Robin's request – "So, I already know that you knew but I'm pretty sure that he had to ask someone else's help, the question is who?" – Robin opened his mouth to speak but Regina interrupted him again – "It can't be David, obviously. It also can't be Henry because he wouldn't be able to hide his enthusiasm for a whole month … so there's only one person left: Snow" – Robin was speechless with Regina's capacity to found out about Killian's plan – "Oh my God! Is she, isn't she?" – she asked with a big smile on her face – "I have to give him credit. He really knows what he's doing: telling Snow first, finding an extra hand, which in this case it's you …" – she said pointing at her fiancé – "planning a boat trip to impress the futu –"

"You're not supposed to know about any of this much less talk about it" – Robin interrupted her – "So let's change the subject, shall we?"

"I may want to talk about our wedding" – she retorted.

"No, just leave the wedding talk to another time" – he said.

"What's the problem of wanting to talk about _our_ wedding?" – Regina insisted.

Robin was about to answer when the dinner's door opened. He immediately saw Roland and Henry running in their direction and the Charming Family entering in the restaurant. He turned his attention to Regina who had now Roland on her lap and gave her a look. She rolled her eyes and whispered something to Roland which made him laugh.

"Good afternoon everyone" – David said, taking a seat next to Regina – "Did you order yet?" – he asked.

"No, we were waiting for you" – Regina said – "What took you so long?"

"David hadn't packed yet" – Mary Margaret said – "But luckily for him Killian helped him"

"Oh, did he?" – Regina said with a smirk – "I was wondering ..." – she started to say turning her attention to Killian who was sat in front of her – "What's the reason for this boat trip?"

Robin closed his eyes wishing he could just disappear. He should have known that Regina would not let pass the opportunity to embarrass Killian.

"It's just a boat trip between friends" – Mary Margaret spoke, noticing Killian discomfort.

"Yes, but why _now_? Why just the three of them? – Regina asked, staring at Killian.

"Why not?" – Mary Margaret spoke again.

"I'd like to know Killian's opinion, since he's the one who had the idea" – Regina said, trying to get rid of Mary Margaret's constant attempts to interfere in the conversation.

"Well, it's been a while since I sailed a ship" – he said remembering the last time he was aboard of the Jolly Roger – "And I thought it would be best if we did this trip now because I'm not so sure if my dear friend Robin will be able to leave the house in a few weeks since he will no longer be a single man anymore" – he teased.

"Yes, our wedding! Did I ever tell you how Robin _proposed_ to me?" – she asked looking at Killian and Emma. Killian immediately looked at Robin who tried to avoid eye contact.

_I can't believe he told her –_ he thought. Robin turned his head and gave him a _sorry _look – _I'm doomed._ _There is no way Regina will pass this opportunity to ruin everything _– Killian said to himself.

"Actually, Regina I think it's better if …" – Robin started to say.

"It was the most romantic proposal that anyone could ask for" – she said ignoring Robin's attempt to speak.

"I have to disagree. The title of the most romantic proposal belongs to me" – David said.

_This is not happening_ – Killian thought, trying to look calm.

"A proposal near the river. How original" – Regina replied –"And the clothes were not even yours. Rumpelstiltskin gave them to you."

"So? He looked like a real Prince Charming" – Mary Margaret retorted.

"Besides, I had saved her from your sleeping curse with a true love kiss. Thank you for that by the way" – David said, staring at Regina. She rolled her eyes – "I guess that means I won" – Mary Margaret cleared her throat – "I mean, _we_ won" – he added, looking at his wife.

"Can we order?" – Robin asked.

During the meal Regina continued to talk about her proposal and her plans for the wedding. She could see the way Killian reacted every time she brought that up. Emma was very quiet as well and barely touched her plate.

David continued to argue about who had the best proposal and then he started to talk about his and Snow's wedding. Mary Margaret didn't react as enthusiastically as she always did; she could see that Killian wasn't being himself, he was very quiet. Luckily David was so involved in the discussion that he didn't even notice his silence.

Mary Margaret was also worried about Emma and the way her daughter reacted to the big news. She knew that Emma had a lot of trust issues but she didn't understand why she was so afraid of Killian's reaction. Everybody could see how much he loved Emma; the way he looked at her; the way he touched her; the way he talked about her. There was something else bothering her, she just had to found out what.

* * *

After lunch the whole family went to the docks. The men checked the boat and put their things on it. Leroy's boat was ready to sail.

Killian was wearing his pirate jacket and Emma couldn't help but smile at the sight of him – _her pirate was really into it_. She knew that Leroy's boat was nothing compared to the Jolly Roger; the one he had given up for her. _An act of true love_ – her mother had told her.

She also remembered when she told Killian that she was sorry he had lost his home in exchange for one magic bean. He had smiled before answering:

"_From the moment I saw you the Jolly Roger was no longer my home"_

_Nevertheless she felt bad for him. She knew he really liked his ship._

"_Maybe we can find another ship" – she told him – "I know that it will not be the same as the Jolly Roger but …"_

"_Maybe it will be better" – he said_

"_Maybe" – she said smiling._

"_I always knew you wanted to be a pirate, love" – Killian softly said._

"_And I always knew you had a thing for princesses" – she said._

"_Just for one" – he said before kissing her._

She was looking at the sea asking for an answer, an advice, a sign when she felt someone wrapping his arms around her body – Killian. He placed a kiss on her hair.

"It's time" – he murmured, pulling her even closer to him as if he was already missing her.

"I know" – Emma said turning her body so she could look at his face – "Are you sure you still know how to sail?" – she asked, touching the collar of his jacket.

He opened his mouth to speak but Emma covered his lips with her mouth. He closed his eyes and responded to the kiss immediately. He grabbed the back of her head pulling her closer. Their kiss was passionate and gentle at the same time. When they finally pulled back Emma spoke again:

"I'm a pirate, remember?" – she said, trying to imitate his accent – "That's what you were about to say, right?"

"Probably" – he said smiling before he kissed her once more. When the two of them finally come up for air they noticed that the eyes of everybody were on them – "I should go before David decides to shot me" – he murmured, feeling David's eyes on them.

"Probably" – Emma said, biting her lower lip after looking at her father.

Killian took a step back and started to turn around to the boat. Emma touched the pregnancy test inside her pocket and looked at the place where her family was; she caught her mother staring at her.

"Killian wait!" – she suddenly exclaimed, walking towards him – "I need to tell you something" – she said, trying to disguise her trembling voice.

Killian remained in silence waiting for Emma to continue. She could feel her heart racing like the first time she kissed him, or the first time she said _I love you_ to him.

"I …" – Emma started to say looking at her feet but then, when her eyes met his she had to take a deep breath before she could speak again – "I love you" – she said.

He stared at her like she was the most precious thing in the world and gave her a smile reserved only for her.

"I love you too, Emma Swan" – Killian said stroking her hair with his hand before he went to the boat – "More than anything" – he murmured, touching the small box inside his jacket pocket.

* * *

Emma watched the boat disappear in the ocean. She had almost told him about the pregnancy but in the last second she lost her courage.

_Maybe it was for the best_ – she told herself – _The trip would be completely different if she had told him about the baby._

Her thoughts were interrupted when Mary Margaret touched her arm.

"I saw the smile on Killian's face. I'm glad you told him" – she softly said.

"I didn't" – Emma said not taking her eyes from the ocean.

"But I thought …" – Mary Margaret said confused – "What happened?"

"I was ready to tell him but then, when I looked at his eyes, I just … I couldn't" – she said with a trembling voice.

"You will have to tell him, honey" – her mother said.

"Tell him what?" – Regina asked, approaching them with Roland and Henry by her side.

Both Mary Margaret and Emma looked at her.

"I was just saying to Emma that she will have to tell Killian that his coat is very old fashion" – Mary Margaret lied, faking a smile.

"What? I love Killian's jacket!" – Henry said – "You could buy me one, mom" – he said to Emma who was now smiling at her son – "So, when he takes me with him to sail we will both look like pirates. Maybe I could use a hook too"

"I don't think you using a hook would be such a good idea" – Regina immediately said.

"I want a pirate jacket too" – Roland said – "And a hook like uncle Killian's hook!" – he enthusiastically said.

"Great, just great!" – Regina said, throwing her arms in the air – "As if a pirate was not enough, now we'll have two more"

"So, kid, are you ready to go home?" – Emma asked.

"Actually I was planning to spend the night with Regina and Roland, if you're okay with that" – Henry said.

"Oh, okay" – Emma said a little a bit surprised – "Fine by me"

"Great!" – Henry said smiling – "See you tomorrow, mom" – he said hugging her while Emma placed a kiss on the top of his head – "Love you" – he murmured.

"I love you too, kid" – she softly said.

When Regina and the boys got into the car Mary Margaret spoke:

"You can stay at our house. You know we have a spare room" – she offered, so Emma wouldn't have to spend the night alone.

"Oh, no … I'll be fine" – Emma said faking a smile – "Besides, I never had the opportunity to have the whole house to myself"

"Honey, you don't have to pretend with me" – her mother said.

"I'm going to be fine" – Emma said – "I'm fine" – she added.

"At least dine with me" – Mary Margaret said; Neal made a sound, drawing the attention of his mother and sister – "Me and Neal, of course" – she said smiling at her son.

* * *

After dinner Regina went to her room and was surprised when she saw two little heads looking at her under the sheets of her bed.

"What are you two doing here?" – she asked, trying to stifle a laugh.

"Can we sleep with you tonight?" – Roland asked, looking at her with his puppy eyes.

"Pretty please?" – Henry added with a charming smile.

"How can I say no?" – Regina said, lying down on the bed between the two of them – "Any particular reason for two of my favorite people in the world to invade my bedroom?"

"It seemed a good opportunity since Robin isn't here" – Henry said – "But I think we could repeat this when Robin arrives from the trip. This bed is big enough for the four of us"

"We'll see" – Regina said smiling.

"Can you tell us a story?" – Roland asked.

"What kind of story, honey?" – Regina asked, stroking his hair.

"Umm … About you and dad" – he said.

"Yeah mom, you never told us how the two of you met" – Henry said, sitting on the bed.

Regina smiled remembering the first time she saw Robin.

"Well, I could be persuaded to tell you" – she said, looking at Henry and Roland. They immediately wrapped their little arms around her and gave her a kiss in each side of her face – "Now I can tell you" – she said laughing – "After Pan's curse we all had to go back to the Enchanted Forest" – she began to tell the story – "Now that I think about it, I should have thanked him for having cast the curse. Anyway … Snow and I were walking through the forest when we heard a little noise coming from the shrubs" – she explained, shaking the sheets as she tried to recreate the whole scene, making Henry and Roland laugh – "But suddenly" – she made a dramatic pause – "a flying monkey appeared from the sky" – she said grabbing Henry and Roland's legs – "and grabbed my arm!"

The boys laughed.

"It was not funny!" – Regina said trying to sound serious which made the boys laugh even more – "So, where was I?"

"The flying monkey had you, mom" – Henry said.

"Right … the flying monkey lifted me in the air but then Snow grabbed one of my legs and we both fell on the floor"

"Why didn't you try to use your magic fire balls on him?" – Henry asked.

"I forgot telling you that part. I had tried that but it didn't work" – Henry and Roland remained in silence, waiting for Regina to continue – "Snow and I were trying to think in a way to defeat the beast when suddenly we heard someone saying _Get down!_" – Regina said, trying to imitate Robin's voice

"It was dad!" – Roland enthusiastically said.

"Yes, it was" – Regina said smiling – "We did as he said and then we saw an arrow hitting the monkey's face and he fled"

"Dad's arrow never misses its target" – Roland spoke again.

"And then you thanked him …" – Henry stated.

"Quite the opposite" – she said, trying not to laugh, remembering the way she had spoken with Robin. _A simple thank you would suffice_ – she could almost hear him saying – "I actually said that I didn't ask for his help"

"Unbelievable, mom" – Henry said, shaking his head.

"I know that I was not very nice to him" – she stated.

"Not very nice? I'm surprised you are going to marry him" – Henry said.

"Ah-ah, my son is so funny" – Regina said, tickling his belly; Roland started to laugh too – "Oh, you think this is funny? Come here, little man" – she added, tickling him too.

"Okay, okay … please stop" – Henry tried to say laughing at the same time – "Another story, another story"

"So you can make fun of me again?" – Regina said laughing as well.

"No, I promise … I promise …"

"Okay then … what story do you want me to tell you?" – she asked, covering both of the boys with a blanket.

"Tell us a story about you. A story before you became Queen; before you had magic" – Henry suggested.

Regina couldn't help but smile. She was glad Henry didn't ask her to tell him stories about the Evil Queen. She was not that person anymore and that kind of story would only cause him nightmares; she really did a lot of bad things which she was not proud of. But the story of a little girl named Regina was a very different story.

"Once upon a time there was a girl named Regina …" – she started to say.

After a few minutes Henry and Roland were peacefully asleep. She kissed both of their foreheads and then she closed her eyes too.

* * *

Emma entered in her room and heard the sound of the waves crashing down on the soft sand outside the balcony door. She made her way to the bed and lay down but when she saw Killian's side of the bed empty she rolled her body and went over to the place where he was supposed to be. She could still feel his scent on his pillow and her eyes filled with tears.

She felt alone and she hated. She didn't feel like that since she was in the foster care; since Neal left her; since she went to prison. She hated that feeling.

That house was her home but know it seemed everything but that. Killian was her home and he was not there.

"Why couldn't you just tell him? God Emma Swan, you're so stupid!" – she spoke to herself – "Isn't he your true love? You're supposed to be able to tell him this kind of stuff, specially this kind of stuff…"

_What if he's not your true love?_ – a little voice inside her head said – _What proof do you have that __**you**__ are his true love? Did he save you from a sleeping curse with a true love kiss? Do you have a magical tattoo? Did pixie dust show you the way to find him?_

Emma put her arms around herself and started to cry. She felt the pregnancy test inside her pocket and took it out. She didn't know how long she stared at the stick before she fell asleep unaware that somewhere, in the middle of the sea, Killian was looking at a small box full of hope and possibility.

* * *

**I hope you liked this chapter. Thanks again for reading and please review (:**


	3. stormy talks

**I made a small trailer for this fanfic, if you want to see it just check my youtube channel (mentioned on my profile) or follow this link: **_** watch?v=FbjWiehURwc**_

**Warning: it can have a few spoilers for the next chapters, I hope you like (:**

* * *

_The heart of man is very much like the sea, it has its storms, its tides and its depths; it has its pearls too_ _―_ Vincent Van Gogh

* * *

The sky was full of stars and Killian could feel a light breeze sweeping through the open window of what would be considered the "captain's quarters" if this boat was actually a ship named Jolly Roger. He constantly had to wonder how all of this happened. After being lost for three hundred years, here he was, preparing for the big talk with David.

During the trip the men shared some stories about their adventures in the Enchanted Forest and in Neverland. While Killian told them about his time in Neverland he remembered that some of the stories that he had shared with David and Robin were the same that he used to tell Henry as bedtime stories.

He really liked the way Henry listened to him, forcing his big curious eyes to stay opened, trying to fight the sleep. Even after Henry falls asleep, Killian always finishes the story hoping that maybe, somehow, Henry still listens to his voice in his dreams.

One day, after he pulled the sheet up to cover Henry's body and made his way towards the bedroom door he listened Henry's voice:

"_Killian?" – he softly asked opening his eyes._

_Killian turned his body and approached him, sitting again on the bed._

"_What is it?" – he softly asked – "I thought you were already asleep dreaming about pirate ships"_

"_I was" – Henry said with a smile. He opened his mouth to say something more but then he closed it again._

"_Hey …" – Killian said touching his arm – "Whatever it is, you can tell me. You know that, right?"_

_Henry nodded and Killian remained in silence waiting for him to continue._

"_It's Robin and my mom – Regina – they are going to marry and I … I was just wondering if you and my mom …"_

"_Oh …" – Killian was taken aback by Henry's words. He was not expecting having this kind of conversation with him – "Would you like if your mother and I …" – he said feeling a little bit nervous about Henry's answer._

"_Isn't that what people who love each other do? I mean, that's what happens in the books and movies, right? The couple gets married" – Henry tried to explain._

_Killian stood in silence looking at the kid in front of him._

"_Did you just give me your blessing to ask your mother to marry me?" – he asked, breaking the silence._

"_What do you think?" – Henry said with a big smile on his face._

He never found difficult to speak with David, at least when the subject wasn't Emma. He knew that David and he were friends but he was also Emma's father and sometimes that could be a problem – like in that particular moment. If David was not Emma's father he could ask him for some advice and his opinion about the right words to use; the right way to impress the father of the girlfriend.

Why couldn't he be like Robin? He didn't have to go through all this stuff since Regina's father was dead. Even David didn't have to go through this; Snow's father had died before David even knew about her existence.

Why did Emma have to be the daughter of Snow White and Prince Charming? Why couldn't she be Regina's sister or … Snow's sister?

Killian's heart was beating so fast inside his chest that he could almost hear it.

_What happened to "I'm a pirate, remember"?_ – Emma's voice invaded his mind, making him smile.

"Here you are!" – Killian almost jumped when a voice interrupted his thoughts. He quickly hid the box inside the pocket of his coat and turned his body to the stairs.

"Bloody hell" – he said releasing the air that he didn't know was trapped in his lungs – "I thought you were David" – he said, facing Robin.

"Just me" – Robin said approaching his friend – "Are you alright? You seem nervous" – he said, trying not to laugh.

"Oh, you think?" – Killian ironically said.

"Well, you survived lunch and Regina's attempt to sabotage this whole plan" – Robin said, hitting him playfully on his arm.

"Thank you for that, by the way" – Killian said rolling his eyes.

"You know Regina. She can be very … intense" – Robin said – "I'm surprised she didn't find out sooner"

Killian started to pace around the room.

"I can't do this" – he mumbled.

"Yes, you can!" – Robin quickly said – "It's just David…" – Killian gave him a look, running his fingers through his hair – "What do you always say?"

"What?" – Killian asked confused –"I don't –"

"What do you always say" – Robin repeated, interrupting Killian –"A man not willing to fight for what he wants …"

"… deserves what he gets" – Killian completed.

"Now go" – Robin said, pushing him towards the stairs – "Good luck" – he murmured when Killian disappeared from his view.

* * *

David was at the helm of the boat looking at the sea when he heard Killian's footsteps.

"Look who is now the captain of the boat" – David said, teasing Killian but the pirate remained in silence. David raised his eyebrow. _Odd _– he thought – "You look like you need a drink" – he said, trying to break the awkward silence – "Actually, I could use a drink too"

Killian opened his mouth to agree with him. It would be easier to make David agree with him after a few drinks, but he quickly erased that thought. He wanted to do this in the right way and in the right way, David needed to be sober.

"No, no drinking" – he said, looking at David – "Though I'm sure we're going to need more than one drink after I tell you what I should have told you hours ago"

"Okaaaay, you realize that I didn't understand a thing that you just said, right?" – David said, raising her eyebrows.

"Sometimes you really sound like Emma" – Killian said smiling at the thought of Emma saying those exactly same words to him.

"Technically is Emma who sounds like me, since I'm her father" – David corrected him.

"Aye …" – Killian said starting to feel nervous again – "Speaking of being a father and all of that … I need to tell you something"

David remained in silence staring at Killian with a worried look.

"As you know … Emma and I are living together for quite some time –"

"One year" – David interrupted him with a serious voice.

"Right, one year" – Killian said, clearing his throat trying to hide his nervousness – "So, what I'm trying to say is that … I thought that maybe … Actually I have been thinking about this for quite some time and according to Henry this would eventually going to happen because that's what happens in the books and movies so –"

"Killian!" – David exclaimed, interrupting Killian again. He closed his eyes for a second before speaking again – "Is she … pregnant?"

Killian blinked his eyes in confusion.

"What?" – he said so low that he wasn't sure if David had heard him – "Who's pregnant?" – he asked confused.

"What do you mean, _who?_ Emma!" – David exclaimed.

Killian almost lost his balance as he heard David's words.

"What … why would she ..." – he murmured – "Why would you think that?" – he managed to say.

"Isn't that what you were trying to say?" – David said, running his fingers through his hair.

"No …" – he said looking at a nervous David.

"So why did you start to talk about _living together_ and _this would eventually going to happen_, because let's face it, I know that you two sleep in the same bed –"

"You really don't want to talk about that" – Killian quickly said.

David shook his head.

"Now I really need a drink" – he said, searching for the beer.

_Can this become more embarrassing?_ – Killian thought.

"Can we celebrate now?" – Robin said appearing in front of them with a big smile on his face, holding three beers in his hands. He quickly realized his mistake when he looked at the surprised look on David's face.

Killian hid his face with his hand, preparing for the worse. David looked at Robbin and then at Killian.

"Can someone explain to me what's going on?" – David asked.

"I should probably go back to …"– Robin started to say before David interrupted him.

"No, you're not going anywhere until someone decides to explain to me what the hell is going on!" – he said, turning his attention to Killian.

The pirate took a deep breath and approached the prince.

"I planned this trip for a reason, mate … but somehow this end up going in the complete opposite direction and the truth is that what I wanted to say to you is actually very simple" – he started to explain – "I love your daughter" – Killian said like it was his deepest secret – "I know that before I met her I was not the most friendly person. I've made a lot of things that I'm not proud of, but if I had the chance to change all the choices that I've made in the past … I wouldn't do it because if I had chosen differently I wouldn't have met Emma and I can't imagine spending the rest of my life without her" – David stared at Killian waiting for the inevitable question – "I know that pirates aren't supposed to fall in love with princesses but I also know that Emma is the only woman that I could and I'll truly love and once we return to Storybrooke I would like to ask her to marry me. Do you give me your blessing to marry her?"

David remained in silence looking into Killian's eyes. From the moment his daughter opened her eyes he imagined how her future would be like; who would be the one to conquer her heart and he never thought that her little girl would share her life with a pirate. Pirates aren't supposed to fall in love with princesses … but what if in a certain page of a forgotten fairytale book is written that once upon a time a certain pirate and a certain princess fell in love?

He always thought that no men would be good enough for her daughter but maybe he was wrong because after seeing Emma and Killian together he couldn't deny that Killian would in fact go till the end of the world (or time) for her.

David opened his mouth to speak but suddenly the night became darker and the sky full of stars disappeared. The sound of a thunder broke the silence and suddenly the calm sea was replaced by rough waves and high wind.

David grabbed the helm of the boat trying to balance himself as Killian was pushed against the left side of the boat; Robin clutched at the mast. For a few seconds David actually thought that they were in Neverland again. The storm was getting worse and when Killian tried to stand up the boom of the boat hit him in the head and he unconsciously fell overboard. Robin and David immediately heard the sound of splash and panic filled their heads.

"Killian!" – David yelled as he ran to the place where the pirate fell. Robin was right beside him, searching the water as well. They could feel the boat shaking because of the rough waves.

"Can you see him?" – Robin asked without taking his eyes from the sea.

"No" – David said as the memory of when Emma jumped overboard in Neverland invaded his mind. He couldn't help but think that this storm was very similar to the one in Neverland. The only difference was that this time there was no mermaid on the boat but despite that it looked like the storm was caused by magic and not by nature – "I'm going to jump" – he finally said starting to climb the gunwale of the boat.

"You're going to do what?" – Robin asked in shock.

"It's the only way! He will drown if we don't find him in time" – David said, rubbing the rainwater from his brow.

"If you jump you will drown too" – Robin tried to explain – "There has to be another way"

"There is no other way!" – David exclaimed, throwing his arms in the air.

"Then I'll jump too" – Robin said, approaching to David, starting to climb the gunwale.

"No" – David said trying to stop him – "Someone needs to be in charge of the boat"

"What boat?" – Robin said gesturing to the destroyed mast and to the ripped sail – "Do you really think that this thing will survive to this storm? Our only hope are the lifebuoys"

David nodded and helped Robin search for the buoys. They threw them to the sea. Both men looked at the sea and then they jumped.

The first thing that David felt after he jumped from the boat was the cold water and the rough waves hitting his body. When he returned to the surface he immediately tried to locate Robin.

"Robin? Robin?" – he yelled, looking around, trying to see his friend.

"I'm here!" – Robin said, putting a hand in the air as the other clutched the lifebuoy.

"I'm going to dive in trying to find him. Hold the buoys until I return. If I don't find him, you try and I hold the buoys" – David said.

Robin nodded and David disappeared under water. He started to search for Killian but with the turbid water and the lack of light it was difficult for him to find his best friend.

He returned to the surface to breathe again.

"Did you find him?" – Robin immediately asked.

"No, I could barely see anything" – David said, trying to keep his head out of water.

"Let me try" – Robin said trying to swim till where David was. He filled his lungs with air and dive into the water.

He tried to see any sight of Killian: his hair, his clothes, his hook … but all he could see was water surrounding him. He felt the need to breathe and started to swim to the surface, but when he had almost reached the surface he saw what it seemed like a dark coat.

"I think I found him" – he said after he took a quick breath.

Robin pointed at the place in the water where he had seen the coat. David followed the direction of Robin's finger and dive in.

Once under water he looked around and immediately saw Killian's body. His eyes were closed. David approached him and grabbed one of his arms. He started to swim till the surface where Robin was nervously waiting. Once he saw them, Robin grabbed Killian's other arm and swam to the buoy.

"Is he alive?" – he asked trying hard to breathe.

David leaned his head in the direction of Killian's head trying to detect if he was breathing or not.

"I don't know …" – David said not sure if the air he felt hitting his face was the wind or also Killian's breathing – "We need to reach land" – he said, shaking Killian, trying to get some reaction from the pirate.

_C'mon Killian_ – he said to himself.

"There!" – Robin yelled, pointing to somewhere behind David. The prince turned his body and saw what seemed to be trees – "Do you think we can swim till there?" – Robin asked.

David looked at Killian's unconscious body before he answered:

"We have to" – he said.

* * *

When Emma woke up the first thing that she heard was the sound of the waves crashing down on the sand of the beach. Usually, the sound of the waves made her smile, but at that moment, that sound reminded her of Killian and his absence.

She got out from the bed and noticed that she was still wearing her red jacket and jeans, so she made her way to the bathroom and took a quick shower before heading to the sheriff station.

It was a typical Monday morning in Storybrooke. The sun was shining and there was no sign of a cloud in the sky.

Once in the station, Emma decided to do some paperwork. She was still the sheriff of Storybrooke but now she had two more deputies to deal with besides her father. Killian and Robin were now part of the team but unlike David and Emma who spent most of their time in the station or the in the main street, Killian was usually by the docks or the beach, making sure that nothing bad happened there; Robin liked to spend his days near the woods and the animal shelter.

Emma's work was interrupted by the sound of the door of the station opening.

"Aren't you supposed to be at the school?" – Emma asked.

"My class is only in a few hours" – Mary Margaret said, sitting in the chair next to Emma – "So I decided to pass by and see how my daughter is doing"

"I'm fine, just have a lot of work to do" – she said pointing to the papers over her desk.

"Here" – Mary Margaret said giving Emma a small cup – "I thought you might need it"

"Thanks" – Emma said with a big smile on her face – "I totally forgot to drink my cup of coffee this morning"

"I'm glad you did. Drinking coffee is not good for the baby" – Mary Margaret said. Emma almost spat out what she had in her mouth – "That's why I bought you a decaf" – her mother added.

"Oh…" – Emma said looking at the cup of decaf she was holding.

For a moment she almost thought that this was all a dream, a beautiful dream but at the same time … Her doubts invaded her mind, just like last night: _What if he's not your true love? What if __**you **__are not his true love?_ She instinctively put a hand over her belly. _Could she go through all of that again? Would she be able to raise a child alone? Would she be able to handle rejection all over again?_

Her thoughts were interrupted by the touch of Mary Margaret's hand on her arm.

"Honey, if there's something bothering you …" – Mary Margaret gently said before she was interrupted.

"Has any of you talked to David, Killian or Robin since last night?" – Regina nervously said entering in the station with her phone in the air.

"No … Why?" – Mary Margaret asked turning her body to Regina.

"Because I've been trying to call Robin all morning and all that this machine has to say to me is: _Sorry, but we are unable to complete your call as dialed. Please check the number and dial again, or call your operator to help you"_ – Regina said, starting to panic.

"Maybe they are in a place with no signal" – Mary Margaret said, trying to sound confident.

"You think?" – Regina said, sitting next to her.

"Don't worry, this kind of thing happen" – Mary Margaret said – "I'm sure it's normal not have signal in the middle of the ocean"

"You're probably right …" – Regina said trying to calm herself – "What about you sheriff, what do you think?" – she asked, turning her attention to a pale Emma –"Emma, are you feeling alright?"

"Yeah … I think I just need to go to the bathroom or …" – Emma said, getting up from the chair almost losing her balance.

"Honey!" – Mary Margaret cried holding one of Emma's arms.

"Maybe we should call Doctor Whale" – Regina said approaching Emma – "You're pale"

"No" – Emma quickly said –"I'm not sick … I'm just preg - tired"

"I know I don't have your super power but I'm pretty sure that you're not _just tired_" – Regina said, forcing Emma to sit again – "We should go to the hospital, Emma"

Emma took off her jacket and opened her mouth to reply, but when she was about to speak the sound of something hitting the ground caught the women attention. They both looked at the small stick lying on the floor.

"Is this a …" – Regina started to say as she leaned down to pick the stick from the ground. She looked at the pregnancy test and then at Emma – "You're pregnant!" – she stated.

Emma remained in silence.

"Oh my God! Why didn't you tell me?" – Regina enthusiastically said – "Please tell me I'm not the last one to know about this, Miss Swan"

"Nobody else knows" – Mary Margaret said – "I was the only one who knew"

"What? You didn't tell Killian?" – Regina asked looking at Emma – "Why the hell didn't you tell him?" – Regina insisted making Emma rise from the chair.

"Because I don't have a magic tattoo in my arm stating that I'm his soul mate or maybe because pixie dust didn't show me the way to find him!" – Emma blurted – "Maybe because I didn't save him from a sleeping curse with a true love kiss … maybe because I don't have any proof that he's my true love … that I am his true love!" – she said, trying to hide the tears from her eyes.

Both Regina and Mary Margaret looked at Emma with concerned.

"That's why you're acting so strange …" – Mary Margaret murmured – "Emma, you don't need to –"

"So that's what you're afraid of?" – Regina suddenly said, interrupting Mary Margaret – "Look at me, Emma Swan" – she said with a serious voice – "If you were not pregnant I would hit that stubborn head of yours with all my strength! Are you blind? You don't need any proof. Stop complicate things! Everyone in this town can see how much that pirate loves you and you're worried about him not being your true love? If you want any proof just look at the mirror" – she said, pointing at Emma's belly – "Do you want more proof than that?"

"I just …" – Emma said with a trembling voice

"You just nothing" – Regina interrupted her this time with a gentle voice – "Don't put your walls up again, Emma. He doesn't deserve that".

"I know …" – Emma softly said.

"Can I ask you something?" – Regina asked her. Emma looked at her, waiting for the question – "Just for the record, I'm asking you this not because I don't know the answer - which I already know - but because you need to hear your own answer; you need to hear yourself saying those words" – Regina said looking at Emma's eyes – "Do you love Killian?"

"Of course I do" – Emma immediately said.

"Of course you do what?" – Regina insisted.

"Of course I love him" – Emma said, hearing her own voice suddenly realizing why Regina asked her that question – "I love Killian" – she said smiling for the first time since Killian went to the trip.

_She loved him. Perhaps she always had. Perhaps she had loved him since the first time she saw him … and even with her tendency to complicate things and all her doubts there was one thing she was certain of: she would always love him; always and forever._

"Are you feeling better now?" – Regina asked, smiling at her.

"Yes"– she said letting herself fall on the chair – "Yes, I am"

"But …" – her mother asked, already guessing that there was a "but" coming from her daughter.

"But I can't shake the feeling that something bad is going to happen and …" – Emma started to say, her voice breaking – "… and that I'm going to lose him"

"You're not going to lose him, honey" – Mary Margaret said, squeezing her hand.

"I just don't want to feel like I'm lost again …" – Emma softly said.

"If you get lost, he'll find you" – Regina gently said making Emma smile again – "Just ask your mother"

"You know our family saying, honey" – Mary Margaret said – "If you love them and they love you, they will always find you"

* * *

After carrying Killian for what seemed like an eternity and swimming in a sea full of waves, Robin and David finally felt the soft sand under their feet. They laid down Killian in the sand and immediately searched for his heartbeat.

"Open your eyes, Killian!" – David shook him – "You have to open your eyes!"

He started to hit Killian's chest not accepting that his friend was gone. The image of Emma invaded his mind. _How would he tell her that Killian died? She would not be able to move on._

Suddenly, Robin's voice interrupted his thoughts.

"David, stop!" – he said – "He's opening his eyes! He's alive!"

David looked at Killian who was now coughing and spitting water. The look on David's face after realizing that his friend was alive was the same he gave Emma after he saved her from drowning in Neverland.

Robin grabbed Killian's shoulders, helping him to sit.

"What happened?" – Killian said at the same time he tried to breathe.

"You scared the hell of us!" – David said, sitting next to him.

"You didn't answer my question, mate" – he said after coughing.

"You fell overboard after you hit your head" – David said remembering the moment he saw Killian disappearing in the sea – "We had to leave the boat behind"

"No … I'm not talking about that … I'm talking about _the question_" – Killian said, emphasizing the word _question_.

"Are you serious? We thought you were dead!" – David exclaimed – "You almost died Killian!"

"I was not going to die before knowing your answer" – Killian said smiling.

"Unbelievable" – Robin murmured, rolling his eyes.

"I need to know, David" – Killian said with a serious voice – "Do I have your blessing to marry Emma?"

David stood up and extended his hand to Killian.

"Why do you think I saved your life?" – he said, holding his hand, helping him getting up.

* * *

**I hope you liked this chapter. Thank you for reading and please review. I really appreciate all your kind words (:**


	4. lost

_**Hello dear readers (: **_

**I wanted to thank you all for your support; it really means the world to me. I also noticed that some people mentioned in the reviews that Snow was very OOC because she was able to keep two secrets. I just want you to know that I always try to stay truthful to the characters and the reason Snow was able to keep a secret was because she didn't have to lie. I really think that the main reason that she is not very good at keeping secrets is because she doesn't like to lie and secrets usually involve lies. **

**In season 3, we saw her telling Emma that Neal was alive because she was not capable of lying to her daughter and because she believed she was doing the right thing by telling Emma the truth. In this story, Snow only told a little lie (chapter 2) when Regina interrupted her conversation with Emma. Anyway, I hope this chapter helps you to understand a little bit more about the relationship between Snow and secrets.**

**Thank you again for reading this story. I hope you like this chapter.**

* * *

_The beauty is an illusion, and also a warning: there's a dark side to beauty, as with poisonous butterflies __―_ Margaret Atwood

* * *

That night, Regina's house had three more people at the dinner table. After the little talk with Emma, the women decided to dinner together.

They failed to call the men during the afternoon but Mary Margaret remained optimistic and kept telling that they probably had no signal at the sea, so they would have to wait a few days until they return. Despite that, Emma was feeling a little better; the talk with her mother and Regina really helped her facing her fears. Now, all that she wanted was to tell Killian about the little pirate she was carrying inside of her. She still had her doubts but now she was able to believe in a happy ending – in their happy ending. _I just have to wait for his return_ – she thought – _then all will be fine._

Once at the table, the boys shared what they have done during the day and Mary Margaret informed them about the new school projects. Regina made her special lasagna and almost forced Emma to eat all the food on her plate. She was thrilled with the idea of being an aunt, or maybe a godmother. She would certainly have a little chat with Emma about that subject.

She caught herself wondering how it would be like if she was on Emma's position. She always wanted to be a mother; to be pregnant. Robin and she never discussed the subject but maybe after the wedding they could have the baby talk; maybe she will be the next with a big belly; maybe one day her wish will come true.

After dinner, Mary Margaret and Regina started the dishes while Emma and the boys decided to play one of Roland's videogames.

"I was little surprise when you told me you were the only one who knew" – Regina said in a low voice.

"Why?" – Mary Margaret said a little bit louder than she intended to – "Why?" – she murmured, narrowing her eyes.

"Because you're not the best person at keeping secrets" – Regina stated.

"I can keep a secret!" – she replied. Regina raised her eyebrow and gave her a look – "What? It's true"

"You're a terrible liar, Snow" – Regina said as she cleaned the dishes – "In fact, I think you you're incapable of lying"

"There's a difference between lying and keeping a secret" – she mumbled.

"Whatever. I'm still impressed that no one found out"

"Well, maybe because I didn't have to lie to anyone" – Mary Margaret tried to explain – "It's not like someone asked me: _Hey, is Emma pregnant?_"

"Yet" – Regina added.

"She's going to tell him and then there will be no more secret to keep" – she stated.

"True, but only if Killian has a little chit chat with David" – Regina said with her devilish smile – "Because if the pirate doesn't has the guts to have _the talk_ with David, then you still going to have a secret to keep"

"How do you even know about that?" – Mary Margaret asked.

"You and Robin really suck at lying" – she said.

"You can't tell anyone" – Mary Margaret murmured.

"Contrarily to some people I know what a secret is" – Regina said with a smirk. Mary Margaret opened her mouth to speak but Regina cut her off – "Don't worry, I'll teach you how to be a liar, a proper liar"

A few hours later Emma and Henry were at home watching one of Henry's favorite shows but Emma couldn't stop looking at the sea outside the big window of the living room. She was so caught up on her thoughts that she didn't even notice when suddenly Henry turned off the TV.

"Mom …" – Henry said causing Emma to look at him –"You don't have to pretend with me"

Emma was looking at her son with a confuse expression.

"I know" – Henry said reaching for her hand.

Emma could feel her heart beating faster after hearing Henry's words. _He knew. How did he find out? Did Regina tell him? Did Mary Margaret tell him? Was her belly already big enough for him to notice?_

"I … I …" – she tried to say, starting to panic – "How did you…"

"Mom, it's okay …" – he said, trying to calm her down – "I know how you feel. I feel the same way" – Emma blinked her eyes trying to follow what Henry was saying – "I miss him too" – Henry explained, giving her a shy smile – "It's strange, isn't it? Not even two day have passed and we already feel like something isn't right; like something is missing"

Emma let go the air she didn't know she was holding and smiled. She was glad that Henry didn't know about the pregnancy, she wanted to tell him with Killian by her side.

"How can you express your feelings better than your own mother? That's not fair" – she said smiling.

"Well, at least we can say that my ability to express my feelings it's not hereditary, so I guess you'll have to figure it out a way to be a little bit like me" – he teased her.

"Maybe tomorrow, kid. Now it's time for bed" – she said getting up from the couch.

Henry rose from the couch and climbed the stairs. Emma followed him until his bedroom. She sat on Henry's bed covering him with the blanket.

"I'm not as good as Killian at telling stories but I can read one of your books, if you want" – she said reaching for one of Henry's books behind him.

"What if I tell you one of his stories?" – Henry said.

"You're the one who needs to sleep, remember?" – Emma said, raising her eyebrow.

"C'mon mom, I promise to sleep after I finish telling you the story" – Henry said with puppy eyes – "Deal?"

Emma looked at him and ruffled his hair.

"Okay, Rumpelstiltskin" – she finally said – "But you better fall asleep as soon as the story ends"

Henry started to tell one of Killian's stories and Emma was surprised with all the details he was mentioning. He wanted to tell the story exactly as Killian had told him. After a few minutes Henry started to yawn and Emma noticed that he kept repeating the same words all over again so she gently continued the story for him. She remembered hearing Killian telling this story to Henry in one of the times she watched them from the doorframe of Henry's bedroom.

When Henry closed his eyes and fell asleep she kissed his forehead and turned off the light of the room.

She made her way down the stairs and opened the door that led to the beach. She could feel the soft sand on her bare feet as she walked through the beach.

It was a beautiful night, the sky was full of stars and the moon was brighter than ever. She sat near the water and looked at the sea.

"Are you thinking about me, _pirate_?" – Emma said to herself picking a sea shell from the sand – "I wish I could talk to you right now. I almost envy the sea for being able to see you, to talk to you … Why can't I talk to you like the sea?" – she said, throwing the sea shell in the water – "I miss you. Come back soon" – she said, getting up from the sand, making her way towards the house.

* * *

The men were sitting next the fire drinking some coconuts they found on the island. They tried to figure it out a way to leave the desert island but none of the plan sounded good enough to work out. Their only hope was to wait for help. Their family would eventually notice that they were gone for too long and would find a way to find them. They just needed to wait and make sure that they survive the wait.

"You know …" – Robin said – "I'm pretty sure that, after this, Regina will never let me put a foot on a boat"

"You're probably right" – David said laughing – "She may even curse Killian since he was the one who had this brilliant idea" – he added.

"Just drink your coconut" – Killian mumbled.

"I thought that pirates knew how to swim" – David teased him – "I guess I was wrong"

"I know how to swim" – Killian retorted

"That was not what it seemed like" – Robin said, winking at David.

"I hit my head, remember? Otherwise I would return to the boat in the blink of an eye" – Killian said – "I'm a bloody pirate!"

"And I'm a _bloody_ thief who needs to sleep" – Robin said yawning – "Goodnight David. Sleep well, _pirate_" – he said, lying down on the sand.

Killian and David remained in silence looking at the waves crashing on the soft sand. If only they had a boat they could be at home in a few hours.

"What would you do if my answer was different?" – David said breaking the silence. Killian turned his body to face the prince. –"Would you marry her even without my blessing?"

Killian stood in silence for a few seconds before answering.

"Yes, I would" – he said, turning his attention to the sea.

"You would?" – David asked, raising his eyebrow.

"Yes, David, I would" – Killian repeated – "If she wanted to marry me then yes, I would marry her, even without your blessing" – he added.

"So why go through all this trouble?" – David asked.

"Because we're family and … because I wanted to this in a proper way" – he explained –"Besides, I know that you tend to be a little over protective over Emma, so…"

"Of course I am. She's my daughter" – David stated.

"And I'm not saying that it is a bad thing" – Killian quickly said – "I would probably be worse than you, if I had a daughter" – he said smiling.

"Are you saying that I should give you a hard time before I allow you to marry my daughter?" – David said.

"That won't be necessary. I already put us in a big mess"

"It was not your fault, Killian" – David said – "It was an accident"

"Still … the trip was my idea" – he said. David put a hand on Killian's shoulder trying to ensure his friend that the accident was not his fault. Killian looked at his friend and smiled – "You're a good man David, I'm glad we're friends"

"I'm glad we're friends too, Prince Charles" – he said with a smirk before lying down on the sand.

_He remembers_ – Killian thought, remembering his trip to the past with Emma and what he said to David: _I'd go to the end of the world for her, or time._

He looked at the sea thinking about Emma and in a way to come back to her before he closed his eyes and fall asleep.

_Maybe I'll see you in my dreams, Emma … Jones._

* * *

**The next morning**

Emma woke up with a hand pressed to her abdomen and tears on her cheeks. She quickly looked at the side of the bed where Killian used to lie hoping to see him but she immediately remembered that she had slept alone.

_It was just a nightmare _–she said to herself trying to erase the bad dream from her memory.

In her dream Killian and she were walking through the beach; she had told him about the pregnancy and Killian had his arms wrapped around her body but suddenly she couldn't feel his touch anymore.

She turned her body to look at him but he had disappeared. She looked around the beach but all she could see was sand and water. She started to run at the same time she called his name. She searched for him for hours without success until she saw a ship like the Jolly Roger at the sea; the ship was moving away from her and when she looked at the helm of the ship she saw him – Killian was at the helm of the ship, sailing away from her.

She yelled his name but he didn't look at her. She continued to yell as the ship disappeared little by little into the sea. He was leaving her.

She went into the water and started to swim but when she was almost reaching the ship she felt something grabbing her feet and pushing her to underwater. That's when she woke up, finding it hard to breathe.

She immediately grabbed her phone and searched for Killian's number. She tried to call him but the only sound she heard was the machine saying that it was not possible to complete the call as dialed. She tried again only to hear the same message. _Still no signal_ – she thought. After a few more calls this time to her father and Robin, she finally gave up.

She got out from the bed and went to Henry's bedroom. After waking up him she made her way down the stairs and walked into the kitchen. She started to make breakfast trying to distract herself from the dream.

A few minutes later Henry entered in the kitchen.

"This is all for breakfast?" – he asked, sitting on one of the chairs of the table kitchen.

Emma looked around the room and realized that she was surrounded by food.

"Not that I'm complaining …" – Henry said, picking one waffle from the plate – "… but don't you think you made a lot of food?"

There were two plates full of waffles next to Henry; three plates with pancakes; at least six breads all over the table; eggs in the frying pan; a plate with lots of bacon; three glasses of orange juice and a cup of hot chocolate with cinnamon.

The kitchen was a mess, not only because of the amount of food, but also because of the plates, glasses, cutlery and pans scattered all over the place.

"I guess I'm a little distracted this morning" – she said realizing that the stupid dream was still on her mind.

_It was just a dream, just a dream, just a dream, just … _The sound of her phone ringing interrupted her thoughts. She reached for it immediately with the hope of hearing Killian on the other side.

"Hello?" – she quickly said.

"Hi, honey" – a familiar voice said.

"Mary Margaret, hi …" – she said, trying to disguise the disappointment in her voice.

"Is everything okay?" – her mother asked.

"Yeah … everything is fine" – Emma said – "Have you talked to da- David, this morning?" – she asked.

"No" – Mary Margaret said –"I tried to call him but they probably have –"

"No signal" – Emma completed.

"Don't worry; I'm sure they're fine" – Mary Margaret softly said – "Besides, stress is not good for the bab-"

"I know" – Emma interrupted her. She remained in silence for a few seconds before speaking again –"Did you eat breakfast yet?" – she asked.

"No, I was just making my way to the kitchen"

"Great! You can eat it here, then" – Emma immediately said.

"Oh no, I don't want to bother you, you should rest and –"– Mary Margaret tried to say before Emma interrupted her.

"Actually, I was hoping you could help me. I think I made enough food for an entire week" – Emma said.

"I'm on my way, then" – Mary Margaret said smiling.

After eating breakfast together, Emma made her way to the sheriff station, while Mary Margaret had to go to Granny's so she could drop off Neal with Ruby and Granny; after that, Henry and she went to the school.

* * *

"Maybe we can make a raft" – Robin suggested.

"No, it's too risky" – Killian said – "And even if it wasn't we wouldn't know in which direction to go"

The men were trying to find a way out of the island for hours without success. Their best idea was to wait for some fishermen to pass by the island so they could ask them for help.

"I thought you knew how to navigate using the stars" – David said looking at Killian.

"And I do … but in order to do that first there has to be stars" – he said pointing to the clouds in the sky – "and second it would be easier if we used the sextant that is lost in the sea forever"

"Great, so even if we had a boat we wouldn't know in which direction to go" – Robin stated.

"Probably not …" – Killian said, scratching his head –"At least not without some guide, like a compass or a map"

"Or a GPS" – David added.

"We're officially lost" – Robin said letting himself fall on the sand.

"Don't worry, they are going to find us" – David said, sitting next to his friend – "We just have to wait"

"I don't think that Regina, Mary Margaret or Emma know how to sail a boat" – he said.

"And they don't have to …" – David said, touching Robin's shoulder – "Regina and Emma have magic; they'll find a way to find us"

"Until then" – Killian said, grabbing Robin's hand and extending his hook to David –"I suggest we start to search for some food"

"I already miss Regina's lasagna" – Robin said as they made their way into the jungle.

* * *

Emma was sitting at her desk. She had a lot of paper work to do, in fact, she was literally surrounded by papers.

She was trying for hours to organize all the documents of the station but the more she tried, more documents appeared. She tried to focus in her work but she couldn't; she couldn't shake the feeling that something bad was about to happen or had already happened.

The memory of her last dream invaded her mind. She grabbed the photo of Killian and she with both of her hands. She didn't know how long she was looking at the photo until she heard Regina's voice.

"Hello, Sheriff" – she said, sitting on the chair in front of Emma's desk.

"Madame Mayor" – Emma said, meeting Regina's eyes – "What can I do for you?" – she asked.

"The question is: what can _I_ do for you" – she said, crossing her legs and resting her hands on her lap. Emma gave her a look saying without words that she was not following – "If you need to take some time out …" – Regina explained – "You know … since you're pregnant" – she added, after making sure that there was no one else in the station.

"Regina, I …" – Emma tried to speak.

"I'm serious, Emma" – Regina interrupted her – "There is no problem at all … maybe a month?" – she suggested.

"A month?" – Emma asked in disbelief.

"You're right … maybe two months" – Regina said, thinking out loud.

"Regina, I'm fine …" – Emma tried to explain – "Besides, a month is already too much, don't you think?" – she added.

"No" – Regina said like it was the most obvious thing in the world – "I'm the Mayor, remember? And if I say that a month it's not too much, then it's not too much"

"And I appreciate your concern but I'm fine, really" – Emma said –"As you can see I have a lot of work to do" – she said, pointing to the papers over her desk.

"Precisely!" – Regina exclaimed – "Don't you see my point?"

"Regina, I'm just two months pregnant" – Emma said after she took a deep breath – "We can talk about that when I reach the forty week" – Regina opened her mouth to protest but Emma cut her off – "Have you spoken to Robin, today?"

"No …" – she said with a sad expression – "I know that Snow said that they probably don't have signal in the high sea but I'm starting to freak out!"

"Yeah, me too" – Emma mumbled.

"No, no, no… you can't!" – Regina quickly said. Emma looked at her confused –"Stress is not good for the baby, Emma! We shouldn't be talking about this!" – Emma tried to speak but Regina continued to talk – "You know what? We don't need to freak out because tomorrow they will be back and everything will return to normal, right?"

"Right" – Emma said, thinking what could be considered _normal_ in their lives.

* * *

It was already night when Killian, David and Robin found a small river in the center of the island. They had tried to find food and water during the all day, but the best they could find was some fruit. The coconuts they had drank didn't satisfy their thirsty, so finding water became their priority.

"Clean water, finally" – David said, leaning down so he could drink some fresh water.

The reflection of the moon on the water made the river look like it was made of silver. It was a beautiful island, more beautiful than Neverland; at least there was no Peter Pan to hunt them.

The men drank all the water they were capable of saving in their stomach.

"Go ahead" – Killian said, washing his face while Robin and David made their way to the beach – "I'm right behind you"

After cleaning his face and his hand he drank a little more of fresh water and started to rise from the ground when suddenly a sound in the water caught his attention. The sight of a woman emerging from the water almost made him lost his balance. The woman had long brown hair and eyes black as night; her lips were pink and she had tanned skin.

_A mermaid_ – Killian thought as her tail turned into two long legs.

"Hello sailor …" – she said with a seductive voice – "or should I call you pirate?"

"I prefer Captain" – he said, trying to reach for his sword, quickly realizing that he had lost it.

"So do I, Captain Hook" – she said, approaching him – "or do you want me to call you Killian?" – she smiled, showing her perfect teeth.

"How do you know my name?" – he said stepping back.

"It's always nice to know the name of the man you're rescuing" – the mermaid said.

"Rescuing? Are you here to rescue us? Did they send you to help us?" – Killian said unable to hide the hope in his voice.

"Not us" – she corrected him –"You"

Killian looked into her eyes and immediately realized that she couldn't be trusted. She was hiding something.

"Who sent you?" – he asked, his voice serious.

"Can't tell" – she said smiling.

"You can't or you won't?" – Killian insisted. The mermaid smiled again and began to brush her hair with her fingers – "Look, I won't leave the island without my friends, so if you're really here to rescue me, help them too … otherwise I'm not going anywhere with you"

"I can persuade you" – she seductively said.

"I doubt that" – Killian said –"Are you going to help _us_ or not?"

The mermaid bit her lip and looked at him. He remained in silence waiting for her answer but after a few seconds he realized that the mermaid wouldn't change her mind. He started to make his way back to the place where Robin and David were when suddenly he heard **her** calling his name.

_No … it's not possible_ – he said to himself, hearing again the sound of a familiar voice.

"Killian …" – she said again – "Why don't you look at me? I've missed you"

He closed his eyes. He knew that if he looked back it would his undoing. He tried to take a step forward but the sound of her voice froze all his movements. He tried to remind himself that she wasn't real, she wasn't _her_, but then he felt her soft hand touching his back.

"Don't you miss me?" – she murmured in his ear.

Unable to stop himself, he turned his body so he could look at her.

"Emma …" – he said so low that he wasn't sure that he had actually spoken.

"Yeah … it's me" – she said, caressing his cheek.

Killian continued to look at her, feeling the need to touch her blonde hair; her soft skin. She smiled at him and leaned her head to kiss him but before she could reach his lips he spoke.

"No …" – he said before their lips touched – "You're not real. You're just an illusion. She's in Storybrooke and …"

"Shhhh …" – she said, touching his lips with her finger – "I'm here. I'm real"

"No …" – Killian said, trying to resist her.

"Don't you remember what I said to you?" – she murmured – "I said that I would save you. Let me save you" – she said, leaning her head so she could kiss him.

He was not able to stop her when she kissed him. She grabbed the back of his head and ran her fingers through his hair, pulling him even closer. But then, while she kissed him Killian felt like something wasn't right; like something was missing. There wasn't any connection between them. He felt empty while he kissed her.

He grabbed her arms and pushed her away; the water was already touching his waist.

"No, you're not her. You're not Emma" – he said looking at the woman in front of him; the woman with Emma's face.

"I can be. I can be whoever you want me to be" – she said – "All you have to do is kiss me" – the mermaid said kissing him again and he immediately felt the difference between her kisses and Emma's. There was no love on the mermaid's lips, only lies.

"No, stop!" – he tried to say between her kisses – "I don't want an illusion. I want reality or nothing" – Killian said, pushing her away.

"And this doesn't feel real?" – she said approaching him. She kissed him again, trying hard to open his mouth with her tongue.

"No, it doesn't" – Killian said, stepping away from her – "I know how a real kiss is and this isn't it. I know the difference".

The mermaid smiled and showed her true face before speaking:

"You know … I was just trying to add some pleasure to our trip but if you don't want it then I guess we'll have to do this in the hard way" – she said looking at him with her black eyes – "Because I'm not the type who breaks a deal"

The mermaid grabbed his arm and pushed him into the water. He tried to let go from her but she was swimming so fast that all he could feel was the water hitting his face.

He didn't think twice when he leaned his hook to her tail. The mermaid immediately stopped when she felt the hook hurting her tail. The red color of her blood started to mix with the water.

Killian removed his hook from the mermaid's body. She tried to hit him with her tail but failed. He tried to reach the surface but she was faster than him and grabbed one of his legs.

He was starting to lose his strength; he needed air. Suddenly he felt someone grabbing his arm, pulling him out of the water. He gasped for air.

"What the hell is going on?" – David yelled. He and Robin were grabbing both of Killian's arms.

Before he could answer him, he pushed them aside and hit the mermaid's chest with his hook. She fell into the water as soon as Killian removed his hook from her chest. Both men watched her dead body disappear in the river.

"We really need to find a way to leave this bloody island" – he said, letting himself fall in the ground.

* * *

**I hope you liked this chapter. Thank you for reading and please share your thoughts with me (:**


	5. hope and agony

_I wait for you like a lonely house_ _―_ Pablo Neruda

* * *

Robin couldn't stop blinking his eyes. He had heard many stories about mermaids and how tricky they were, alluring the sailors to their death, but he never had seen one with his own eyes before. Most of his days were spent in the woods, and the only beasts he had seen were trolls, flying monkeys and black knights.

The blood of the mermaid was all that remained as the body disappeared into the water. He was so focused in what he had just seen that he didn't even notice Killian and David talking with each other

"… Emma … I thought she was Emma …" – Killian said, trying to recover his breath.

"Killian, calm down" – David tried to say but Killian continued to talk.

"She said she was trying to rescue me ..." – he started to explain – "It was part of the deal … someone –"

"I don't understand" – David interrupted him – "If she was trying to help us then why did she –"

"She wasn't" – Killian quickly said – "It was just me. She just wanted me" – he said, running his fingers through his hair – "Someone sent her"

"Who sent her?" – David immediately asked, realizing that it was not Snow or Regina or Emma who sent the mermaid, otherwise she wouldn't just try to rescue Killian.

"I don't know … She said she couldn't tell" – Killian said, remembering the mermaid's words.

"Something isn't right" – David said getting up from the ground – "This doesn't make any sense. There are no mermaids in this realm"

"Apparently now there are" – Killian said with his head in his hands – "I can't believe I fell for that"

David looked into Killian's direction.

"Hey, don't blame yourself" – he said, touching Killian's shoulder – "She tricked you"

"I should have known that it wasn't _her_!" – Killian said, rising from the ground – "I should have tried to make her say who sent her instead of letting her seduce me. She could have been our answer to get out of this island and now, because of me, she's dead."

"She would have killed Robin or me if you had not killed her" – David said.

"Not if I haven't been so blind in the first place!"

"I once fell for that too in the Enchanted Forest" – David started to say. He had to make Killian understand that it wasn't his fault – "I was trying to help Abigail to save the man she loved. She needed some of the water of a lake with magical properties but the lake was guarded by a mermaid and when I tried to steal some of the water she appeared and transformed herself into Snow. She kissed me and for a moment it felt real but then, when she kissed me again I realized that something wasn't right, that something was missing" – Killian listened to David and remained in silence looking at his friend, remembering the similar situation that had happened to him minutes ago – "Of all the powers that mermaids have I think this one is the most dangerous of all" – David said – "We're human and contrarily to these beasts, we have feelings and sometimes those feelings can be used against us. The mermaids think that the human feelings are our greatest weakness but in the end they are our greatest strength"

"What did you say?" – Robin asked approaching them.

"Do you want me to tell the story again?" – David asked, looking at his friend –"Because it could ta-"

"No, not that …" – Robin interrupted him – "You said that mermaids have powers"

"Yes, they have many powers … They can allure men to their death, travel between realms, change the weather and …"

"Cause storms" – Killian stated, realizing what Robin was trying to say.

"What if the accident with the boat was not an accident? What if someone conjured the storm?" – Robin asked.

"Not someone" – David said – "The mermaid"

"She said that someone sent her. That person is probably the one who told her to cause the storm. It must have been part of the deal" – Killian said, trying to put the pieces of the puzzle together – "That's the only explanation"

"But why?" – David asked – "Who would want to harm us?"

The men looked at each other trying to find the last piece of the puzzle.

"I have no idea, mate" – Killian said, looking at the sea. _But I intend to find out_ – he thought.

* * *

Like the morning before, her subconscious still struggled by her deepest fears. Emma had woken up, sweaty and terrified. In her dream she lost Killian or the baby or both. She never felt so powerless. Being forced to watch herself losing the people she loved over and over again was starting to mess with her head.

She sat on the side of her bed and fought to control her breath. She instinctively touched her stomach, trying to assure herself that everything was fine; that it was just a bad dream.

She wanted nothing more than to be able to see him; to know that he was safe. That's when she remembered that, in a few hours, Killian would be there by her side. The trip was supposed to be only for a couple of days and this was the second day she had woken up alone, even if it seemed like a whole year. So, according to her counts, the men should return during today. She smiled at the thought of seeing Killian again. Truth to be told, she was not sure she would be able to sleep alone for much longer or wake up without the presence of him by her side.

After taking Henry to school she went to the sheriff station and tried to distract herself with work.

After lunch, Leroy entered in the station.

"Good afternoon, Leroy" – Emma said smiling at the same time she tried to organize some papers on her desk.

"Hi …" – Leroy said with a sad smile. Hearing the strange tone of voice of the dwarf, Emma looked at him – "Umm… Something happened …" – he said.

"What is it?" – Emma immediately asked – "Trouble at the mines again?"

"No … everything is fine at the mines …" – Leroy nervously said, approaching Emma's desk.

"So what is it?" – Emma asked again.

"The docks … Something happened at the docks …" – Leroy said without looking at Emma.

"Oh … okay, usually is Killian who takes care of the problems at the docks but if it is important …"

"It's important!" – Leroy quickly said –"It's about my boat … is at the docks and –"

Before Leroy could finish the sentence Emma rose from her chair.

"Why didn't you tell me that sooner?" – Emma exclaimed – "They returned" – she said unable to stop smiling.

"Emma … I –" – Leroy tried to say.

"Thank you so much for telling me" – she said, hugging him – "We meet at the docks"

As Emma made her way to her car, she called Regina and Mary Margaret telling them the big news. They agreed to meet at the docks.

Emma could feel her heart beating inside her chest. It seemed that Killian had been gone for a thousand years when in reality it had only been a couple of days. She couldn't help but smile as she drove to the docks.

_He was back, safe and sound. He had returned home; he had come back to her like he always does_.

She couldn't wait to meet his deep blue eyes again.

Emma pressed down harder the accelerator. She was ready to tell him _everything_.

When she parked the car and approached to the place where the boats were, she didn't expect to see half of Storybrooke there too.

_Odd_ – she thought – _Did they come to see them too? _

She caught some of the dwarfs looking at her with a sad expression. She started to pass through the amount of people that were looking at the water and couldn't help but notice that some of them were looking at her with a worried look while others tried to avoid eye contact. She opened her mouth to ask why were all of them there; why were all with the funeral look on their faces, but she suddenly felt someone touching her shoulder.

"What the hell is going on?" – Regina asked behind her – "Why is half of Storybrooke here? Don't they know what privacy is?"

Both women continued to walk ignoring the way people were looking at them, at least, Emma was trying to; Regina gave them her _Evil Queen_ look.

When they finally realized to where all people were looking at Emma reached for Regina's arm almost losing her balance. Regina suddenly became pale and almost forgot how to breathe.

The remains of what once was Leroy's boat were floating on the water. At that moment time had stopped for Emma and Regina. There was no sight of the men. All they could see was a destroyed boat with no one a board. Tears started to fall from Emma's eyes. Her nightmares were becoming true and this time she couldn't wake up and erase them; this time they were real.

_No, no, no_ – she could hear her thoughts screaming inside of her mind – _This isn't happening; this can't be happening. He was supposed to come back. Why did this keep happening to her? Was she destined to be alone? How could she be the savior and not be capable of saving the people she loved?_

"He's not dead" – a familiar voice said.

Regina turned her body to look at Mary Margaret. Emma remained in silence looking at the remains of the boat, trying to ignore her mother's voice.

"They're not dead" – Mary Margaret said approaching them.

"Stop with your optimism about everythi –" – Regina tried to say, cleaning some tears from her eyes.

"He's not dead" – Mary Margaret said again –"We share a heart. I would have known if David was dead. I would have felt it … and if he's not dead, Killian and Robin aren't either. You have to believe!"

"Stop!" – Emma blurted – "Just stop acting like this is some fairytale! Because it's not … this is real life and they are … they …"

"Emma …" – Mary Margaret tried to speak.

"They're dead …" – Emma murmured crying – "I … I can't … He can't be …" – she said touching her stomach, feeling more powerless than ever. _Why didn't she tell him?_

She felt her knees trembling and her body started to shake. Regina grabbed one of her arms, preventing her from falling.

"Emma, breathe …" – Regina said. Emma looked at Regina's face, noticing her red eyes and some tears on her face – "Your mother is right … We have to believe … _They_ would want us to believe" – she added.

Emma nodded and took a deep breath, trying to calm herself. She wanted to be optimistic as her mother and strong as Regina, but in that moment, as much as she tried, she couldn't be neither of them. She saw Mr. Gold and Belle approaching them and ran in their direction.

"Gold, help us" – she begged.

Rumpelstiltskin looked at Regina and Mary Margaret's faces and then to the place where the pieces of the boat were floating quickly realizing what had happened.

"Emma …" – he said trying not to hurt Emma's feelings – "There's no way …"

"It must be something that you can do …" – Emma insisted, trying to fight the tears that were falling from her eyes – "Please … your magic must be powerful enough to –"

"You know that it isn't" – he interrupted her, remembering Neal's death – "I'm sorry, but all the evidences indicate that they're gone" – he said, feeling Belle's hand on his arm.

"No … you don't know that …" – Emma said not knowing if she was trying to convince Mr. Gold or herself – "Mary Margaret … she says that David is alive … they share a heart and … and …" – she tried to explain, starting to cry again.

Belle approached Emma holding her in her embrace.

"I'm so sorry, Emma" – she whispered caressing her hair.

"It must be something … it must be something we can do…" – Emma said releasing herself from Belle's embrace and meeting Rumpelstiltskin's eyes – "If they are alive then it must be something that we can do"

"I can try to do a locator spell" – Rumpelstiltskin said – "But it may not work if they –"

"Do it!" – Regina interrupted him – "Please…" – she softly said.

Belle looked at her husband and squeezed his hand.

"Very well" – he said, looking at the women – "As you know, when Greg and Tamara kidnapped Henry I did a locator spell that showed us that he was in Neverland. I used a drop of my blood to perform the spell because Henry is my grandson"

"You need the blood of a relative" – Regina stated.

Before Mr. Gold could reply Emma spoke:

"You can use mine" – she said. There was no need to use Roland, Henry or little Neal's blood. David was her father so her blood could be used to perform the spell.

Rumpelstiltskin made appear the same globe he used when they followed Henry till Neverland. Emma pricked her finger on the needle and let the blood fall on the globe. They waited in silence as they watched the blood spreading.

"Something isn't right" – Rumpelstiltskin said, leaning his body to the globe – "There's something blocking the spell"

"What? What do you mean?" – Regina asked.

"I don't know how to explain it" – Rumpelstiltskin said, staring at the globe – "It's like there is some barrier blocking the spell" – he added – "I'm sorry but this spell is useless"

"So that's it? He's gone forever?" – Regina exclaimed, feeling all the hope she had inside of her disappear at the possibility of never seeing Robin again. She instinctively looked at her engagement ring.

"We can try to perform another locator spell but it can take some time …" – Rumpelstiltskin said – "And I'm going to need your help" – he said, pointing at Emma and Regina – "But I should warn you, the spell might not work and we can have the same result as before and there is nothing worse than false hope"

* * *

The men were sitting around the fire, trying to process all the information they got after the mermaid's incident.

David was making a list of some possible scenarios, writing them with a stick on the ground.

"So, according to our suspicions the boat accident was not an accident" – he said, pointing with the stick to the words he had written on the ground.

"Aye" – Killian said after drinking some of his coconut – "The mermaid conjured the storm which affected, specifically, the place where the boat was … and it worked"

"Then we managed to escape and found this island" – David said –"And today the mermaid showed her face saying that someone sent her, the question is: who?"

"It has to be someone with power and money, otherwise it wouldn't be able to make a deal with a mermaid" – Killian explained.

"Do you think the person who sent her promised her money?" – David asked.

"That or gold and jewelry" – Killian replied – "Mermaids are known for their vanity; they like expensive and rare objects" – he added.

"So, the person who sent her must be powerful and rich" – David said, writing his words on the ground – "But why us? Why did this person attack _us_?"

"I don't know, mate" – Killian said – "I made many enemies during the years I used to sail the seas but they are all dead now. Not many people have the chance to live for three hundred years"

"Didn't you make any enemy recently?" – David asked, looking at his friend – "During the year of Pan's curse, perhaps?"

"Blackbeard" – Killian said, remembering the year he spent away from Emma – "But he died"

"Are you sure?" – David insisted – "Because if there is a possibility of –"

"I'm sure, David" – Killian interrupted him – "I killed him" – he said low, remembering the day he threw the man to the sharks in his attempt to erase Emma from his memory and the constant reminder that he would never see her again; in his attempt to be the man he used to be before he met her.

The men remained in silence for a few moments hearing the sound of the ocean. There were only few stars in the sky because of the many clouds that were making the night seem darker.

"We have no idea who tried to kill us, then" – David said, throwing the stick away from him, breaking the silence.

"I don't think that someone tried to kill us" – Robin spoke for the first time. David turned his attention to the man sitting next to him – "At least not on purpose" – he added.

"Robin, the storm that destroyed the boat was caused by magic" – David said – "Someone wanted to destroy our boat"

"Then why did the mermaid say that she was trying to rescue Killian? It doesn't make sense if we were supposed to die in the first place" – Robin replied – "I think the storm was an attempt to get to Killian but things didn't go the way the mermaid planned because he hit with his head and fell overboard"

"It would be easier for her to kidnap me if I was unconscious" – Killian stated.

"Maybe she thought you were dead and didn't want to face the person who hired her" – Robin said – "If the deal was to rescue you and you were dead, she would gain nothing in taking you to whoever hired her"

"But why me? Why would someone pay to kidnap me and not to kill me?" – Killian asked more confused than ever.

"I don't know Killian, but whoever it is, wants you alive" – Robin said, noticing the concerned look on Killian's face – "We really need to find a way to go back to Storybrooke"

"We were supposed to go back today" – David said – "I'm sure, by now, they've noticed that something isn't right" – he added.

"I hope so because we're running out of coconuts" – Robin said, trying to cheer up his friends.

* * *

Later that night, Emma was at her parent's apartment reading one of the many spell books that Rumpelstiltskin had managed to find in his store. Most of them required specific ingredients that Emma didn't even know that existed.

She was not able to eat anything after knowing about the men disappearance. Fortunately, Henry did not remember that they were supposed to return during that day so he didn't ask any questions about it. Regina had managed to keep him and Roland away from the docks so they wouldn't find out about the boat accident.

Emma caught herself wondering how she would tell Henry about what had happened.

_How did you tell a child that his stepfathers and grandfather are lost somewhere in the sea? How could she tell him that they were gone? How could she tell him that he would never see them again?_

"You're really going to read all of these books?" – Henry's voice interrupted her thoughts. He sat next to her on the couch.

"I'm trying to improve my magic" – Emma said, faking a smile –"Weren't you the one who wanted me to practice my magic more often?"

"Cool" – Henry said with a big smile on his face.

_Cool _– Henry's words echoed in her mind. _If only you knew the truth, kid – _Emma said to herself.

"I think I'm going to drink a hot chocolate with cinnamon. Do you want something?" – he said, getting up from the couch.

"No, I'm good, kid" – Emma said glad that he didn't mention Killian.

She continued to read the spell book she had on her lap trying to keep her eyes open. She was very tired. The fear and the worrying were exhausting but she fought the sleep the best she could. She had to find a way to find him, no matter what.

She yawned a few times and without realizing her eyes started to close. She lay down on the couch; her hands still grabbing the book.

A few minutes later Mary Margaret found Emma sound asleep. Henry was in the kitchen drinking a cup of hot chocolate. She covered her daughter with a blanket and went to the kitchen.

"What do you think about sleeping in the spare room of your favorite grandmother?" – she said, sitting next to Henry.

"Does that mean that I can drink another cup of hot chocolate?" – he asked, looking at Mary Margaret with his puppy eyes.

"I don't know … did you make enough for two?" – she asked, grabbing one cup for herself.

"What do you think?" – Henry said smiling.

* * *

**I hope you liked this chapter. Thank you for reading and please review (:**


	6. déjà-vu

**I'm so sorry for the amount of time it took to update this. College work stole all my time to write this story. I hope this chapter makes up for the wait!**

**Happy reading.**

* * *

_How dark it is; how far I am from shore _— Gregory Orr

* * *

**The next morning**

"No …" – Emma murmured during her sleep.

Her body started to shake as tears fell from her closed eyes. She wanted to escape from her deepest fears but as much as she tried she couldn't open her eyes. It was like she was stuck in her nightmares.

"Emma" – a familiar voice said, touching her arm – "Emma, wake up!"

Her eyes remained closed and she winced, showing a facial expression of pain as her body continued to shake, making the book she was still holding fall to the ground.

"You have to wake up, Emma" – the voice said again – "Wake up…"

"No!" – she suddenly yelled, opening her eyes, gasping for air.

"Shh …. It's okay …" – Emma heard someone say – "It was just a dream"

She looked at the person kneeling in front of her.

"Regina?" – she said confused, feeling the touch of her friend's hand on her shoulder – "What … What are you doing here?" – she asked, looking around the room – "What am I doing here?" – she added, moving herself to a sitting position.

"You fell asleep last night" – Regina said, sitting next to her.

"I did?" – she said so low that she wasn't even sure if Regina had heard her – "Where's Henry?" – she asked.

"Don't worry, Snow took him with her to school" – Regina said.

Emma looked at the kitchen table and noticed that there were a lot of books and papers scattered all over the table.

"I thought we agreed to meet at your house to continue the research" – she said.

"Yes, I know … but when your mother called me saying that you were still sleeping I thought it would be better if I meet you here instead" – Regina said.

"Did you find anything?" – Emma asked, rising from the couch, making her way to the kitchen.

"Unfortunately not" – Regina said, yawning as she approached Emma.

"How long have you been awake?" – Emma asked, noticing that Regina had bags under her eyes; her hair and makeup were also a little mussed.

"I didn't sleep" – Regina said, reaching for a cup of coffee that Mary Margaret had prepared before heading out to school – "I couldn't" – she added.

Shame seized Emma as soon as she heard Regina's words. Regina had spent the whole night searching for a way to find them while she fell asleep the moment she sat down on the couch.

How could she be so weak to succumb to the sleep? She was the savior. She was supposed to save the people she loved; instead she fell asleep without even finding a way to reach them.

"Stop it" – Regina said, interrupting Emma's thoughts – "You're pregnant, Emma. You need to sleep … besides, we have more chances to find something if we do the research together"

"I'm so sorry, Regina … I shouldn't have slept" – Emma said – "Not before I had found a way to bring them back ho-"

"Emma, you're pregnant now" – Regina interrupted her – "It's absolutely normal if you feel more tired than before" – she added – "You needed to rest, to save your magic"

"What if we find a spell and my magic isn't strong enough?" – Emma asked with a worried look on her face.

"We're in this together, Emma" – Regina said, holding Emma's hand – "We have enough magic to do any kind of spell"

"Have you talked to Gold?" – Emma asked – "Did he find anything?"

"He's been trying to collect as many ingredients he can that might be necessary to perform a locator spell" – Regina explained.

"I read that some ingredients to perform this kind of spells are hard to find" – Emma nervously said.

"I know" – Regina said.

"What if he doesn't has what we need? What if-"

"Emma, you need to calm down" – Regina exclaimed – "We need to find the spell first, remember?" – she said, raising her voice. Emma remained in silence looking at her friend – "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have talked to you like that" – Regina said, running her fingers through her messed hair.

"No, don't apologize" – Emma said – "I'm the one who should apologize" – she started to explain – "I wouldn't know how to deal with all of this without you, Regina. You've been so supportive about everything and all I have been doing lately is complaining. Robin was on that boat too and your wedding is in a few weeks and …" – Emma took a deep breath before speaking – "And I don't know how you do it … how you manage to remain strong and confident"

"I'm not the only one who is strong" – she said with a small smile – "You're too"

"All I have been doing lately is crying and complaining and regretting things I should have said or done" – Emma softly said, pushing a strand of her hair behind her ear.

"That doesn't mean you're not strong Emma, because you are" – Regina said – "Besides, you can always blame the hormones" – she added, trying to make Emma laugh.

"I'm serious" – Emma laughed quietly – "No more crying. I need to start acting like a savior and saviors don't cry".

* * *

Rumpelstiltskin was at his pawnshop collecting some antiques and items that could be needed to perform a locator spell. He searched for rare ingredients as well. Despite the fact that he agreed to help Emma, Regina and Snow he couldn't help but think all of this research would be for nothing.

The locator spell that he had cast at the docks should have worked. He was starting to doubt if the spell hadn't worked because of some force that was blocking it or because it was not possible to perform a locator spell to find something who was no longer in this world to be found; who was no longer alive. If it was that the case there was no magic in the world capable of bringing them back (to life) home.

He opened some old books searching for answers. Books about light magic; books about dark magic; books about blood magic … None of them said a word about finding dead people or corpses. All the spells he found only worked in living things.

_Spells only serve life, not death_ – he read – _because only life can be changed, altered, improved._

He started to read another book.

_Everything is subject to limitations or conditions. Everything is finite._

He flipped through the book, looking at the all the pictures and words in it.

_There must always be a balance. Nature is bound by the laws of the alpha and the omega: that which begins must end; that which is born must die; that which is done by magic must have a means to be undone by magic._

He continued to read trying to find something relevant.

_Magic is the power to affect change in the world by supernatural means. Magic can often be split into bright and dark, though depending on the situation, can also be neutral._

He tried another spell book hoping to find a new list of spells and rituals.

_Linking Spell: a spell that is able to link two people together._

The list had many of different spells.

_Pregnancy Identification Spell: a spell used to identify if another is in fact pregnant._

He closed the book and opened another one; he was reading one of the pages when Belle softly touched his shoulder.

"Did you find a spell that can help?" – she asked, caressing his arm.

"I'm not even sure that that spell exists" – Rumpelstiltskin said, leaning his head so he could look at his wife.

"What do you mean?" – Belle said with a worried expression on her face, sitting next to him.

"I know that none of you want to believe it but there is a very big possibility that they –"

"Rumple" – Belle interrupted him – "We don't know that. _You_ don't know that" – she said – "Just look at us, we've lost each other so many times and we're still _here, together_"

"Belle, our situation is different" – he said, holding her hand gently – "I'm the dark one; I'm made of magic and magic can always be restored …"– he explained –"If we're willing to pay the price" – he added, remembering Neal's sacrifice_; a life for a life_.

"I know that, but we can't give up without even trying" – she said.

"That's the problem Belle, we've already tried" – he said, closing the book he was reading –"And we failed"

"No, you said that something was blocking the spell" – Belle insisted, refusing to give up so easily – "What if you try to perform it again? Maybe this time it will work"

"I don't know Belle; I'm not sure if the spell failed because of some force that was blocking it or because …" – Rumpelstiltskin didn't finish his sentence – "Why torture them with false hope?" – he asked, referring to the women.

"It's not false hope, Rumple" – Belle said – "It's a belief, faith … We can't take that away from them. We have to believe"

Rumpelstiltskin stared at his wife for a few seconds, remembering the reason why he had fallen in love with her. She was so positive, so kind, so Belle. It was if she had a light inside of her capable of illuminate all of his darkness; all of the bad things in the world. He leaned in and kissed her.

"You're right, as always" – he said smiling as their foreheads touched – "I'll continue to search"

"And I'm going to help you" – Belle said, grabbing the book next to her.

* * *

Emma had no idea for how long she and Regina were searching and performing spells. She had lost count of the hours they were at her mother's apartment. Regina's eyes were becoming redder because of the lack of sleep and Emma was feeling more exhausted as the hours passed by, even if she refused to admit it.

She was reading one of the spell books for the second time when the sound of something crashing almost made her jump from her chair. She immediately looked at Regina.

"I can't do this anymore" – she said, looking at the wall in front of her – "This is worse than any curse I could ever cast"

Emma opened her mouth but before she could say anything, the door of the apartment opened.

Mary Margaret was carrying Neal in her arms while Henry and Roland were speaking and laughing at each other, but when they looked at Emma and Regina's faces they immediately stopped talking and focused their attention on the women and the mess around them.

"Hi, moms" – Henry said approaching them – "What happened?" – he asked, pointing at the pieces of glasses lying on the floor.

"It was me" – Emma said after looking at a speechless Regina – "Regina was trying to teach me a new spell but it didn't end well"

"You're still practicing?" – Henry asked – "What about last night?" – he asked again.

"I already told you" – Emma said – "I'm trying to improve my magic"

"Why?" – he insisted.

"Why what?" – Emma asked confused.

"Why are you trying to improve your magic?" – Henry immediately said. Emma tried to speak but he spoke again – "Why now? Why do you need it? Did something happen? Is there a new curse coming?"

Emma approached Henry and caressed his arm, trying to assure him that everything was fine.

"You don't need to worry, kid. Everything is fine" – she said, raising her head and looking at Regina and Mary Margaret – "I'm just trying to –"

"When will daddy come home?" – Roland asked Regina, interrupting Emma.

Silence invaded the room. Regina didn't know what to say. She was not prepared to tell him the truth and she was not ready to lie to him either. She had thought that by now, Emma and she would had found a way to reach Robin and the others but Roland's question came before the answer even exist and know she didn't know what to do or say. She looked at Emma and Mary Margaret trying to find an answer but they were all speechless.

Suddenly someone broke the silence:

"That's it, isn't it?" – Henry said with a trembling voice – "That's why you've been practicing your magic…"

"Henry –" – Emma tried to say.

"What happened?" – he asked – "Are they hurt? Are they lost? Are they –" – Neal crying interrupted him.

Mary Margaret started to sing a lullaby, trying to calm him down but the baby continued to cry. Tears were beginning to appear in Roland's eyes and he turned again his attention to Regina.

"Is daddy hurt? Why did Henry say that?" – Roland started to babble with a trembling voice – "Where is daddy?"

Regina leaned down her body so she could hold Roland's hands and look into his eyes.

"Shhh … honey, please don't cry" – she softly said – "Everything will be fine. Please don't cry"

"You have to tell me the truth" – Henry said – "I deserve to know what happened to them"

As Henry continued to talk Emma looked around the room trying to understand when the chaos had started. Mary Margaret was trying to make Neal fall asleep but his crying didn't seem to have and end. Roland was crying too in Regina's arms as the Queen caressed his air and said gentle words, trying to comfort him. Emma focused again on her son, realizing that he was trying to stay strong and fighting the tears already in his eyes. She reached for his hand but he took a step back.

"I think we should talk about this at home" – she said.

"Why? So you can continue to lie to me with no one else around to hear it?" – Henry accused her.

"Kid …" – Emma tried to say.

"Stop calling me that" – he blurted – "I'm not a kid anymore. I can handle it. Whatever it is, I can handle it" – Henry insisted.

"No, you can't!" – Emma almost yelled. _Why was so hard for him to understand? Why couldn't he just do what she says for once? She was her mother. She knew what was best for him –_"Look what this conversation did to Roland. We need to go home"

Henry remained in silence looking at his mother. He didn't want to go home without knowing what exactly had happened. Was he destined to lose every single member of his family? He needed proof. He needed to know what her mother was hiding from him.

"What home?" – he said before running to the room where he had spent the night.

Emma stood speechless as Henry ran away from her. His words echoed in her mind. _What home? _Was their house by the beach still a home or just a house?

Emma took a step forward but Mary Margaret's voice stopped her.

"Just give him some time. I'm sure he will come around" – she said and Emma nodded as she realized that her brother was no longer crying – "Can you hold him for a second? I need to prepare his food" – Mary Margaret asked.

"Sure" – Emma said and somehow holding Neal made her feel more relaxed. She looked at her brother and saw him smiling at her and that genuine smile managed to steal a smile from her – "Thanks" – she said looking into his big green eyes.

She looked around and saw that Roland had fallen asleep on the couch. His head was lying on Regina's lap as she caressed his dark brown hair.

"This is going to be a long night, little brother" – she whispered.

* * *

Henry was lying on the bed looking at the ceiling. He didn't know if he was mad or sad. Maybe it was a mix of both. He couldn't understand how they could have kept this information from him. He deserved to know the truth; he needed to know the truth. Did they forget all the times he helped during Operation Cobra? He was so good at finding evidences. Maybe if they told him the truth he could help them doing whatever Emma and Regina were trying to do.

He sat on the bed, trying to figure out a way to make himself useful but his eyes caught the picture that was on the bedside table.

Emma was the one who had taken the picture. They were at Granny's and Regina had brought her new camera with her.

_Men only_ was written behind the photo. David had Neal on his arms, Killian was seated next to the prince, Henry was seated between him and Robin and Roland was seated on the table. He could almost hear Granny yelling and reminding them about the rules of the restaurant.

He put the picture on the bedside table and got up from the bed.

He opened the door of the room without making a sound. He could see Emma and Mary Margaret's back on the kitchen and Regina seated on the couch. There was no way he could get out of the house without being seen. He closed the door and bit his lip trying to figure it out a way to get out of the house when he saw the window above the bed. He climbed to the bed again and opened the window.

_I can do it_ – he thought as he looked outside the window – _It's just a small jump, well it's more like a fall… but I can do it_ – he leaned his body to the open window – _Regina or Emma's magic can heal any wound or broken leg or arm … or both – _he closed his eyes and jumped.

* * *

Regina was carrying Roland in her arms. He was sound asleep and she didn't want to wake him. She needed to think in a good story to tell him about the disappearance of Robin. Mary Margaret put a blanket on his shoulders and opened the front door.

"Meet me at my place after breakfast" – Regina said to Emma – "We have to continue the searching for … something" – she added. Emma nodded – "And make sure Henry is okay and give him an extra goodnight kiss" – she said before leaving the house – "If you need my help with anything call me"

As soon as Regina left the house, Emma let herself fall on the couch. Mary Margaret put Neal in his crib and seated next to her daughter.

"I don't know what to tell him" – Emma confessed, running her fingers through her hair.

"Yes you do" – Mary Margaret softly said. Emma looked at her, trying to figure it out what her mother was trying to say – "You have to tell him to have hope but to do that you have to believe, to have hope too"

"I don't know if I can, I'm not like you" – Emma said – "I know that optimism runs in the family but I think it skipped one generation"

"You'll know what to do" – Mart Margaret said – "You're such a strong woman, Emma, but more important, you're a great mother.

"A great mother?" – Emma said, covering her face with both hands and faking a laugh – "Look how well my attempt of a conversation with Henry went… Did you hear what he said?" – she asked, remembering Henry's words – "He doesn't want to go home. He doesn't even considers our house a home … and the sad part is that I think he's right"

"We both know that's not true" – Mary Margaret said, holding Emma's hands – "Do you think that Killian would want you to say that if he was here?"

Emma's heart skipped a bit when she heard her mother saying Killian's name.

"That's the problem. He isn't here" – she blurted.

"But he will be" – her mother quickly said – "We're going to find a way to find them because that's what this family does, we find each other, no matter what"

Emma remained in silence trying to find the courage to talk to Henry.

"I'm going to talk to him" – she said, getting up from the couch. Mary Margaret smiled at her.

Emma looked at the closed door in front of her and took a deep breath. She knocked on the door and waited for an answer. After a few seconds she decided to speak.

"Henry, it's me … can I come in?" – she gently said – "I have to talk to you about …" – she stopped talking trying to find the right words to say. She rested her head on the door – "I really need to talk to you"

The door remained closed and nobody spoke. Her right hand was hovering over the door knob. _Maybe he fell asleep_ – she thought.

She decided to open the door slowly. She looked at the bed, hoping to see her son sound asleep but all she saw was empty sheets. She noticed the open window and panicked.

_This is not happening. This can't be happening. Not again. Not you too. I can't lose you too._

She ran to the window, trying to see any sign of her son but all she could see was the black night and the moon. She became pale, her body started to tremble as she ran out of the room.

She had almost reached the front door when her mother's voice made her stop.

"Emma, what's wrong? Where are you going?" – she asked with concern.

Emma wanted to speak but the words got stuck in her throat. How was she supposed to speak when she could barely breathe? All she could think about was Henry.

"Honey, talk to me … What is it?" – Mary Margaret asked as she approached her – "Did Henry say something that upset you?"

"He's not in the room" – Emma managed to say with a trembling voice –"He, he ran away … I think he jumped out the window … I, I need to find him" – she said opening the door.

"Wait, I'm coming with you … let me just call Belle to –"

"No, it's late" – she interrupted her – "You need to stay with Neal, you need to stay with him…"

"Let me call Regina, then …" – Mary Margaret said, picking the phone.

"No … She needs to sleep and Roland needs her …" – Emma nervously said, taking a step forward – "I have to go, I have to find him" – she said, stepping away from the house.

She was not sure how much time had passed since she left her mother's house and started looking for Henry. Different kind of scenarios started to invade her mind.

_Was he okay? Was he hurt? Was he still in town? Was he lost? Would she be able to find him? What if she never sees him again? God, he was just a kid … he shouldn't have to be experiencing all this pain and sadness. He was supposed to be worried about school and videogames not about lost parents or death._

She was driving through the main street for the third time, hoping to see any sign of Henry. There was no one on the street. Granny's was already closed.

She wanted to ask if someone had seen him but there was no one to ask. She felt helpless. Storybrooke was a small town but with so many places where someone could hide.

She felt guilty because somehow she could see herself in Henry's reaction. He had ran away just like she always did when she was his age and even now she had this tendency to run away from her problems and to think that running away was the best way to fix things, to fix herself.

But since Storybrooke became a safe place again and she found her family she started to feel safe again and loved and truly happy. She should have known that her happiness wouldn't last, it never did and it never will, Killian and Henry's disappearance were the proof of that.

Without even realizing she found herself at the docks. She used to love to go there but now, despite all the beautiful memories that she had about that place, all she could think about was the image of the remains of the Leroy's boat.

She detected some movement near the boats and got out of the car. She approached the place where she had seen the shadow with caution because of the lack of light. It was like a déjà vu. It was like she was living the same moment when she found out about the accident all over again but this time alone, without Regina by her side.

Suddenly she saw the person she was looking for – Henry. He was looking at the place where the destroyed boat was. He heard her approaching. Emma ran to him with tears in her eyes and hugged him, making him look at her.

"Oh, thank God" – Emma said, pulling him even closer to her – "What were you thinking? You scared the hell of me!" – she said, feeling the tears on her face.

"I had to know …" – Henry said – "I had to find some proof … that something had happened" – he explained, trying not to cry.

"I thought I had lost you, Henry …" – Emma said.

"I'm sorry mom" – he said, hugging her – "I'm _so_ sorry, I didn't want to –"

"Don't do that again" – she interrupted him – "Never do that again. I can't lose you too" – she added, biting her lower lip.

Henry turned his body to the place he had been looking at since he jumped out the window. They couldn't be dead. They had to be somewhere else, alive. Good always wins, right? She felt Emma's hand on his shoulder.

"We need to find them, mom" – he said without taking his eyes from the water – "It must be a way"

"We've been trying to locate them but none of the locators spells that we used worked" – Emma softly said.

"What does that mean?" – Henry asked worried.

"I don't know, kid" – Emma said.

"You're doing it again …" – Henry said, turning his body so he could face her – "You're keeping information to yourself. You're lying"

"Kid …" – Emma tried to say.

"I'm not a kid anymore!" – he said – "I might like hot cocoa with cinnamon and to hear stories before sleeping and working on Operation Cobra but I already faced villains like Peter Pan and Zelena and Greg and Tamara and flying monkeys and …" – Henry took a deep breath before continuing – "I had to face death. I'm almost fourteen years old, mom. I'm not a kid"

Emma looked at her son realizing that he was right. He was so much more than a kid and that scared her. She didn't want him to deal with this kind of stuff. He might not be a kid anymore but he would always be her son, her kid.

"I'm just trying to protect you" – she admitted –"I don't want you to get hurt. I don't want to hurt you"

"You won't. The lies will" – Henry said.

"I know … that's why I'm asking you to trust me on this" – Emma said, caressing his cheek – "Just give me some time to try to figure it out what is really happening before I give you an answer"

Henry nodded and hugged her again.

"We always find each other, mom … You know that, right?" – he asked, resting his head on her stomach.

"Yeah, I know" – she murmured, kissing the top of his head.

* * *

No matter how hard he tried, Killian couldn't sleep. The men were lying down on the sand near the fire. Robin and David had their eyes closed while Killian was looking at the few stars shinning in the sky.

Old memories invaded his mind and he tried to erase them so his thoughts could focus on a different thing: the person who hired the mermaid to kidnap him … or rescue him. As much as he tried he couldn't figure it out who could be that person and he hated that feeling. He didn't like to think about the consequences of having an enemy at this stage of his life.

He was finally building a life and a family and whoever this person was could put in danger the people he loved; use them to get to him. As a matter of fact, that had already happened: Robin and David almost died because of the storm that destroyed the boat and were now stuck in this island.

Killian couldn't stop feeling guilty about all that happened. If he hadn't suggested this trip none of this would happened but on the other hand he could almost feel relieved for Emma and Henry not being in this mess; they were safe.

_Are they? _How could he be certain of that if he was stuck in this island? What if this person decided to go to Storybrooke and hurt them?

"Can't sleep?" – David's voice interrupted his thoughts.

He sat down and looked at the prince.

"We're going to need more wood for the fire" – David said – "And definitely more coconuts maybe we can find new fruits too. Robin is good at finding things in the woods, and yes, I know that there are no woods in this island, only jungle but still … I think we can manage to find some food. We survived Neverland, right?"

"Do you think they are safe?" – Killian suddenly asked not answering David's question.

"Yes, everything was fine in Storybrooke when we left. Why are you asking this?" – David asked.

"I was just thinking about all that happened" – Killian started to say – "If there's someone out there looking for me I … I don't know, what if this person decides to go to Storybrooke and do something?"

"I don't think we should worry about that right now" – David said.

"How can you be so calm? They could be in dangerous, because of me!" – Killian nervously said.

"I think we should focus on one problem at the time" – David calmly said – "First we need to figure it out a way to get out of this island. Besides, there's no way for us to know what is happening in Storybrooke so we need to believe that they are fine and that we will see them soon"

Killian caught himself thinking how much alike David and Mary Margaret were. He didn't know how they could remain so optimistic after all they've been through.

"And don't forget they have magic" – Robin spoke still with his eyes closed – "Powerful magic"

"I thought you were sleeping" – David said.

"It's impossible to sleep with you two talking and the sound of what seems to be a whale approaching the beach" – he said – "I never thought the sound of the sea could be so disturbing and noisy … I don't know how you and Emma can sleep … your house is literally on the beach … how did you –"

"It's not a whale" – Killian interrupted him, realizing that the sound they were hearing was not the sound of the waves crashing on the sand. He turned his attention to the ocean and nothing prepared him for what he saw.

"Is that …" – David started to say, standing up from the sand.

"Aye" – Killian softly said not believing in his own eyes –"It's the Jolly Roger"

* * *

**I hope you liked this chapter. Thank you for reading and please share your thoughts with me (:**


	7. the captain

**Hello dear readers (:**

**Thank you so much for your support! I love reading the reviews! This story is for you so I really appreciate all your kind words.**

**Happy reading and happy 2015!**

* * *

_I can't exactly describe how I feel, but it's not quite right. And it leaves me cold_ _―_ F. Scott Fitzgerald

* * *

"What do you mean _It's the Jolly Roger_?" – Robin said, rising from the sand.

Killian's attention was entirely on the ship that was approaching the beach, his ship. He was so focused on what he thought he would never see again that he didn't listen the amount of questions that Robin was asking about the ship.

"It's impossible …" – he murmured to himself – "This isn't real. It can't be…"

He couldn't exactly tell what he was feeling in that moment. It was a mix of emotions. He should be happy for seeing the ship again but now, seeing it approaching him, somehow it didn't feel right. It was like he was seeing himself in a mirror; an _old mirror_ reflecting his past – the pirate obsessed with vengeance – the man he used to be; _the man before Emma_.

He always thought that the Jolly Roger would always be his home but now, looking at it, the only thing he could see was a ship, a beautiful ship, but not a home. A ship with too many painful memories. A ship with the story of his life without Emma.

"Can you two stop looking at the ship and explain to me what is going on?" – Robin exclaimed – "Didn't you trade your ship for a magic bean?" – he asked. Killian just nodded – "So why is the ship here? Isn't it supposed to be in another realm?" – Robin asked confused – "Wait, are we in another realm? What if are us that are in another realm? Is that possible?"

"Robin, your babbling is not helping, at all" – David said – "Killian to whom did you sell your ship?"

"Some old man who said that his captain always liked the Jolly and couldn't be happier to know that I was selling it" – Killian said, turning his attention to David.

"And what's the name of this captain?" – David asked.

"I don't know" – Killian simply said, turning his attention back to the ship.

"You didn't ask?" – David exclaimed, not wanting to believe that they didn't have a clue what kind of people was in the ship – "We need to know who we are going to deal with, Killian!"

"Knowing the name of the bloody captain was the least of my concerns" – he said – "I just wanted the magic bean" – _I just wanted Emma_, he thought.

"So you don't know the name of the owner of the Jolly" – David said. It wasn't a question.

"No, I don't know the name of the captain" – Killian softly said.

The men remained in silence for a few seconds but then Robin spoke:

"What does a white flag means?" – he asked

"No harm" – Killian immediately said, seeing the white flag that Robin was talking about.

"It seems you sold your ship to decent people and not thieves or pirates, shocking" – David said, ignoring Robin's complains about the thieves' part.

Killian looked at the sea thinking that maybe the ship that was once his could be his way back home.

* * *

"I lied to him" – Regina said as soon as Emma entered in her place – "I never lied to him and now I did"

"It's for the best Regina" – Emma said, entering in the living room. She immediately noticed the amount of books scattered all over the room – "He's just a kid … and technically you didn't lie, we don't know the truth so …"

"I told him that they were late because they lost track of the time fishing" – Regina said, remembering the exact moment when Roland woke up and asked her where was Robin and when would he come back. She had fallen asleep in an armchair next to him, after she put him to bed, no wanting to leave him alone – "That's a lie" – she sadly added – "How did it go your talk with Henry?"

"He knows" – Emma said, looking at a nervous Regina – "I had to tell him, he jumped out of the window and went to the docks and –"

"He saw the remains of the boat" – Regina interrupted her – "Did you tell him about the locator spells?" – she asked, running her fingers through her hair.

"More less" – Emma said – "He knows the locator spells didn't work but doesn't know the reason why they don't work"

"Neither do we" – Rumpelstiltskin suddenly said, appearing in the middle of the living room. In another time Regina would complain about the way he entered in her house but not this time; they needed all the help they could get.

"Did you find something?" – she suddenly asked, rising from the couch.

"I believe I did" – he calmly said as he sat next to Emma.

"Spell it out" – Regina nervously said – "Do you know where they are?"

"No, all the locator spells that I tried didn't work" – Rumpelstiltskin said – "But I found an old spell that is able to tell us if they are alive or not" – he explained, looking at the two nervous women next to him.

After a few minutes of silence Emma spoke:

"Mary Margaret and David share a heart if he was dead she would have felt it" – she said with a trembling voice – "How does this spell help us finding them?"

"The thing is, Miss Swan, we used your blood to perform the locator spell because David is your father but it failed" – he started to say – "Blood attracts blood as life attracts life, the spell should have worked. We need real proof. We need to know why all the locator spells don't work otherwise we're just wasting our time"

"What do you need to perform the spell?" – Regina asked after looking at Emma and seeing her nodding.

"Are you one hundred percent sure you want to do this?" – Rumpelstiltskin asked – "Sometimes the truth is crueler than the lies"

"What do you need?" – Regina said again.

"I need something to connect with them, more specifically, I need a bond of blood" – Rumpelstiltskin said – "I'm going to use the blood of a relative to do the connection, just like I did with the locator spell but this time –"

"Wait, again the blood thing?" – Emma asked – "If we use my blood the only person we're going to know that is alive is my dad"

"Roland has Robin's blood running in his veins" – Rumpelstiltskin stated. Regina was about to protest but he spoke again – "The spell only requires a drop of blood"

"I don't think we should involve him in this mess" – Regina softly said –"Magic always comes with a price"

"A drop of blood in exchange of certainty" – Rumpelstiltskin said – "I think is a good price"

"What about Killian?" – Emma suddenly asked – "How do we do to know if he …" – she bit her lower lip.

"I'm afraid we won't be able to know if the pirate is alive or not" – he said – "The spell only works if we use the blood of a relative"

"But –" – Emma tried to say.

"We'll find a way, Emma" – Regina interrupted her trying to calm her down. She mouthed _don't worry_ and Emma immediately realized that she was referring to the stress and the baby combination, so she took a deep breath and tried not to think about the possibility of never seeing Killian again.

"Shall we begin?" – Rumpelstiltskin asked, rising from the couch.

"No, Roland is at school. We'll do it later" – Regina said – "I still have to figure it out a way to get a drop of his blood"

"I'll come back at midnight then" – he said before disappearing.

Emma and Regina remained in silence looking at the place where the Dark One had been moments later.

* * *

"It's been hours since we saw movement in the ship" – Robin said, standing up from the sand – "Why didn't anyone approach us?"

The men had lost count of the time they were looking at the ship. It was night when they saw the ship appearing right in from of their eyes and the sky was now starting to turn black again and nothing new happened.

Every type of questions was starting to invade their minds. _Who was the captain of the Jolly Roger? What kind of people were aboard of the ship. Would they going to help them? Could they trust them?_

"Do you think they saw us?" – Robin asked again – "Do you think they know there's someone stuck on this island?"

"Obviously" – David said before Robin started to panic – "Otherwise they wouldn't put that flag on the mast" – he added.

"Right …" – Robin said, sitting down on the sand again – "Still, don't you think that something isn't right? Nothing happened since the ship appeared" – he asked.

"We are stuck on an island!" – David stated – "None of this seems right to me, Robin"

"I agree with Robin" – Killian spoke for the first time – "Something isn't right. The appearance of the Jolly can't be a coincidence" – he couldn't quite explain it but he couldn't shake the feeling that something big was about to happen. Good or bad, he didn't know.

"This can be our only chance to go home, guys" – David said, trying to remain positive.

"What if it is a trap?" – Robin asked.

"What if it isn't?" – David insisted. Robin opened his mouth to speak again but David was faster than him – "We need to get out of this island and right now our only chance is that ship over there" – he said pointing at the ship – "We can't let this opportunity slip through our fingers. We need to believe guys, and if we have to fight, we'll fight"

As soon as David stopped talking a small boat with three men aboard left the Jolly Roger and started to move towards the beach.

Suddenly, Killian's mind started to work at the speed of light. They had lost hours looking at the ship and totally forgot to elaborate a plan in case things didn't go as they hope.

They would need to think quickly. Surely, they were outnumbered but all they needed were some weapons and the odds could quickly be on their favor. The only thing they would have to worry about was the way they would manage to get the weapons. The men aboard were certainly pirates and pirates have weapons. Killian, David and Robin were all good fighters so if they managed to steal the right weapons they could have a chance.

"Dave, fill your pockets with as many sand as you can" – Killian started to say – "Robin, grab some of the wood and make at least three torches"

The men looked at him with a confused look on their faces but quickly understood his plan.

The sand could help them during an attack if they throw it into the men's eyes. That would give them time to steal their weapons and knock them down.

The torches would be used as soon as the boat arrived at the beach. They couldn't confront the men without some kind of weapon.

Killian was searching for some stones and filling his pockets with sand.

Robin gave David and Killian a torch in the precise moment that the boat arrived. They approached the boat slowly.

"We were sent to lead you to the ship" – one of the men spoke.

Killian noticed he was the oldest of the three men on the boat. He also noticed that they didn't look dangerous. They were definitely pirates but there was something about them that didn't quite fit in the pirate model.

"Who are you and who sent you?" – David demanded to know.

"We are members of the crew of the ship that goes by the name Jolly Roger" – the man said.

David noticed that the man hadn't completely answered the question.

"Who sent you?" – he asked again.

"The Captain of the Jolly Roger" – the man simply said – "We are just following the Captain's orders"

"And are we supposed to believe that you are here to help us?" – Robin asked – "How do we know that this isn't a trap?"

"You don't" – the man said. David was ready to speak but the man spoke again – "The Captain warned us that you could have this reaction, that you could be a little suspicious about us and the rescue thing, so the Captain told us to inform you that the destination of the ship is a land named Storybrooke"

"How do –" – Killian spoke, after being quiet during the conversation, but was interrupted before he could finish the sentence.

"The Captain knows everything, Killian Jones" – he said, answering the question Killian was about to ask (How did they know about Storybrooke?)

"You know who I am" – Killian stated. It wasn't a question.

"As I said: the Captain knows everything" – he said again – "The Captain also informed us about the name of your friends. The illustrious Prince Charming, also known in this realm by the name David Nolan" – he added, turning his attention to the prince –"and the famous thief of the Enchanted Forest, Robin of Locksley, also known as Robin Hood"

"What do you want from us?" – David asked, raising his voice.

"You have nothing to fear from us. The Captain just wants to help you" – the man said.

Killian couldn't hear the word _captain_ again. The man was constantly saying it. It was if this _captain_ was a ghost. It was if the _captain's _name was a big secret. _The captain, the captain, the captain_ … couldn't he just say the name of the bloody _captain_?

"May I know the name of the _Captain_ of the Jolly Roger?" – Killian tried to say without showing his annoyance.

Actually, it was kind of ironic because in a small part of his mind he was still the Captain of the Jolly. Killian couldn't quite explain it but the man sounded like he was speaking somebody else's words. He sounded like a puppet.

"We are not allowed to reveal the Captain's name" – the old man said – "The only thing that we can say for sure is that the Captain truly wants you to return to your land"

"So, you're saying that some _captain_, out of the kindness of his heart, decided to help us?" – Killian said – "Because, let me tell you something, according to my experience, pirates don't do that kind of things"

"You, more than anyone, should know that people have the tendency to surprise you" – he said.

"What is that supposed to me –" – Killian tried to say.

"We'll go" – David said, interrupting Killian, noticing that the men had thrown their swords to the sand – "We'll go with you"

* * *

"How did you manage to get that vial with Roland's blood?" – Emma asked looking at the vial.

"I asked Whale for a small favor" – Regina said, sitting on the couch –"I asked him to do Roland a blood test. Of course that first I had to explain to him that the needle was like an arrow, a little bit smaller than the arrows that Robin uses" – she said with a sad voice.

"Did he ask about him again?" – Emma asked.

"Just that he misses him and can't wait for him to come home" – she said remembering Roland's words and the way his eyes shined every time he talked about his father.

Emma wanted to say something to comfort Regina; to make her feel better but she couldn't, comforting people was not one of her qualities and she hated it.

"It's almost midnight, Rumpelstiltskin should be –" – Regina started to say.

"Here!" – Rumpelstiltskin completed Regina's sentence – "I'm always punctual, dearie"

"Let's begin then" – Emma said, approaching him.

"Do you have the boy's blood?" – he asked.

"Yes, what more do you need?" – Regina asked nervously – "I've brought some ingredients from my vault"

"I'm going to need a glass with black sand, three candles, salt and a handful of herbs" – Rumple said – "I've brought the rest of the ingredients … they are rare ingredients I must say: two eyes of a blue dragon and the ashes of a phoenix"

After Regina find all the ingredients, they put it all together and Rumpelstiltskin started to cast the spell. Emma couldn't understand a single word of what he was saying but the yellow smoke that was starting to appear around the ingredients was probably a signal that the spell was working.

"I'm going to need the blood to finish the spell" – Rumpelstiltskin informed them.

Regina immediately grabbed the vial with Roland's blood and let it fall on the ingredients. Emma grabbed a knife and made a small cut on her hand and then she closed it and watched the blood fall from her hand to the ingredients that disappeared and turned into smoke.

Rumpelstiltskin opened a transparent box and the smoke immediately entered in it and became white.

"We should have the results in a few seconds" – he said.

"How? – Emma asked – "How are we going to know if they are alive or not?"

"The smoke that is now inside the box will divide into two colors: one for Robin and one for David, indicating that both are alive, if not, the color of the smoke will turn black" – Rumpelstiltskin began to explain – "The first color that will appear will be Robin's, since Roland's blood was the first to touch the ingredients"

"So, we just have to wait for the smoke that is now white, to change into two colors?" – Emma asked.

"Precisely" – he said.

The women waited for the results, not taking their eyes from the box. Black was the forbidden color. There had to be two colors inside that box and neither of them could be black.

Suddenly, some of the smoke started to change and a green color invaded not only the box but also Regina's eyes.

"He's alive" – she murmured feeling her eyes fill with tears – "He's alive" – she said again, this time louder. Before Emma could say something, Regina wrapped her in a crushing hug and she couldn't help smiling at the good news.

Regina took a step back, releasing Emma from the embrace and started to clean the tears from her face, focusing once more on the box.

Just as had happened before, the white smoke started to change and a brown color appeared next to the green.

"Oh my God" – Emma said, covering her mouth with her hands – "David is alive. My dad is alive" – she said, turning her attention to a smiling Regina – "They are both alive. We have to tell my mom" – she stated, searching for her phone.

She was searching for her mother's name on the contact list when Rumpelstiltskin's voice caught her attention.

"Very peculiar" – he said, looking at the box.

Fear invaded Emma's heart at the possibility of her happiness turn into sadness.

"What is it? Did something happen with the spell?" – she quickly asked.

"As a matter of fact, yes, something happened with the spell" – he said, not taking his eyes from the box – "The spell is still working"

"Why?" – Regina asked – "We already have the results"

Rumpelstiltskin's attention left the box and his eyes were now on Emma's. _Could it be possible?_ – he asked himself.

"You will be happy to know that the results of the spell were better than we expected" – he said – "According to the spell not only David and Robin are alive but also the pirate" – he added with a weird smile.

"What?" – Emma softly said – "Gold, if this is some kind of joke …"

Rumpelstiltskin moved a little bit to the left, so Emma could see the box that his body was hiding. She almost lost her balance when she saw not two, but three colors inside of it. Green, brown and blue.

_How was this possible? _The spell was only supposed to reveal if David and Robin were alive. They didn't use any blood bond to know if Killian was alive…

"So, when will it be the big announcement, dearie?" – Rumpelstiltskin asked, interrupting her thoughts.

"I … I don't know, I need to call Mary Margaret, she needs to know" – she said confused. She was still trying to process the news – "The rest of the town I don't know … I don't know if we should tell people now, I mean … we haven't found them yet…"

"No, no, no, dearie" – Rumpelstiltskin interrupted her – "I'm not talking about the news, I'm talking about the _big _news" – he said, emphasizing the word _big_ and Emma felt his eyes on her belly.

She instinctively covered her abdomen with one of her hands, finally understanding his riddles.

"How did you know?" – she asked

"There's a reason for the spell have revealed not two but three lives … and the answer lies inside of you" – he explained – "You're pregnant" – it wasn't a question – "Technically, because you're carrying his child, your blood is now bond to his"

The three people in the room remained in silence for a few moments.

"Only Mary Margaret and I know" – Regina said, looking at him with her serious look.

"Of course, your secret is safe with me, Miss Swan" – he said, understanding Regina's unspoken words.

Emma nodded – "Thanks"

"Well, my work here is done" – Rumpelstiltskin said, approaching the front door – "Good night to you both, and Emma …" – he said as he opened the door – "congratulations"

As soon as he closed the door, his hand reached for the scarf he had inside the pocket of his jacket. He hadn't mentioned but as soon as Emma cut her hand he felt like someone had opened a bottle full of magic; rare magic, so he cleaned some of her blood that remained on the table when the spell ended.

Finding out that she was pregnant would definitely help in his investigation and that little detail could, in fact, be the key of the whole mystery.

* * *

"Are you sure this is a good idea?" – Robin asked for the second time since they got aboard of the small boat.

The pirates were on the other edge of the boat speaking so loud that it was like they had forgotten that they were not alone on the boat.

"There's no turning back now, is it?" – Killian said, looking at the Jolly Roger as they approached the ship.

"We should have got more information from them" – Robin murmured so that the other men didn't hear him – "We should have thought of a plan, we should –"

"We should have taken the opportunity and that's what we are doing right now" – David said – "Look, guys, I'm sorry I made the decision without consulting you first but this is our only chance" – he started to explain in a low voice – "When I saw them throwing the weapons to the sand I knew that something wasn't right … it couldn't be that easy …"

"Oh, I'm so much better now, David!" – Robin ironically said – "You decided to accept their _help _because this is no help at all … it's a trap! Are you out of your mind?"

"Don't you get it? They know about Storybrooke!" – David murmured – "This Captain is up to something, we can't let them get anywhere near the town"

Robin nodded, understanding David's plan. They couldn't let the ship discover Storybrooke; they had to do something to prevent that from happening. God knows what these pirates were up to … they could be planning to cast a new curse or worse.

"What do you think, Killian?" – David asked, noticing that Killian had barely spoken since they got aboard.

"I think you're right" – he said without taking his eyes from the ship – "We can't trust them. There's something about them … about the way they talk about this _Captain_ … I don't know how to explain it but when the man looked at me there was something that … it was like he knew me"

"He knew all of us" – Davis said – "Our names, our monikers, where we live…"

"No … it's more than that –" – Killian tried to say but before he could finish the sentence the boat stopped and he quickly noticed that they were right in front of the ship that was once his.

The men in the ship had thrown a rope ladder and one of the men that was with them on the boat started to climb it, David was next, then Robin and then Killian and the other two men that remained on the boat.

As soon as Killian stepped into the ship he immediately glanced around. The ship looked well-kept, the deck looked tidy, the wood polished and even at night he could see that it still gleamed like when the ship was his. He also noticed that the crew was not as big as he imagined, perhaps ten or eleven men.

"The Captain told us to escort you to the brig, since the only quarters available are not in the best conditions" – a tall man informed them. Next to him were two men, one of them with a small scar on his face.

As they made their way to the brig, Killian started to try to put the pieces of the puzzle together. He didn't buy the lame excuse about the quarters, not when the ship looked so well-kept. This captain didn't want them in the quarters. The crew with so few men was also a strange thing. Any captain of a ship with a bigger crew could easily take the ship to himself in a blink of an eye. His thoughts were interrupted as soon as they got to the brig.

The brig was a long narrow room, divided into four cells. The four cells were empty. One of the man gestured for them to enter in the cells, each one in a different one. David was the first to enter and he noticed that the crewman left the door unlocked.

"Aren't you going to lock the door?" – David asked with a confused look.

"No, the Captain told us to treat you like guests and not hostages" – the man said.

David sat on the tiny bed next to the wall. Robin was the next to enter in his cell.

Killian took a step forward but one of the crewmen stopped him before he could enter into his cell.

"The Captain asked to see you" – he said.

Killian looked at his friends who were looking at him with a concern look on their faces. He opened his mouth to say something but the crewman spoke again.

"Only you" – he said answering the question Killian hadn't had the time to ask – "The Captain wishes you no harm, only to talk to the former owner of the Jolly" – the man added when he saw Robin and David trying to approach Killian.

"I'll go" – Killian said with a confident voice.

He needed to know who this captain was. They needed all the information they could get about these people.

He was no fool; the unlocked doors meant nothing, just an attempt to gain their trust. They couldn't lose focus.

He looked at David and Robin once more trying to reassure them that he had all under control before he left the brig.

The men led him through the bowels of the ship, like he didn't know the way to the Captain's quarters. A few minutes later they arrived at an open door that would lead him to the cabin.

"The Captain is waiting inside" – the man with a scar on the face informed him. Killian watched them take a few steps back, leaving him alone in front of the open door.

He entered into the room and glanced around the dark cabin. Only a few candles illuminated the cabin and he felt a strange feeling as he entered deeper into the room that had been his.

He recognized the shelves scattered with books, the desk, the maps on the walls, and the bed in the corner of the room. He felt a light breeze sweeping through the open window and that was when he noticed what looked like a shadow next to the window.

He took a step forward and opened his mouth to say a few words to the _so famous captain_ but when his feet started to move, the moonlight lit the person who was looking at the ocean outside the window.

His heart stopped. He couldn't see the person's face, only the back of the body but he didn't need it because in that moment time and space had stopped for him.

Even in the dark he would recognize that long and brown hair, those arms, that thin waist, that body smelling like the ocean.

He had been right. The captain was a ghost. Unconsciously he reached for the ghost, like a moth who is drawn to the light.

He grabbed the person's arm, realizing that it was not a ghost at all. It was real. The person turned its body and suddenly Killian saw himself reflected in the eyes of the last person he thought he would ever see again.

"Milah" – he said, breaking the silence.

* * *

**I know, I know … I'm a horrible person for leaving you like this but please don't hate me. I promise you that it will all make sense. Next chapter will explain a lot of things … and who doesn't love a good twist? (:**

**Let me know what you think!**


	8. talking with a ghost

_There is no present or future – only the past, happening over and over again – now __―_ Eugene O'Neill

* * *

"_According to an old pirate legend, once upon a time a brave pirate and his crew arrived in a peaceful and rich kingdom. _

_In that kingdom lived a beautiful princess. When the pirate saw her he immediately knew that his eyes had never seen true beauty until that moment. So one night he invaded the castle so he could talk to her, touch her, know her. _

_He found her in the garden of the palace. When his blue eyes met her green eyes he saw that there was no fear in them, only curiosity. He told her stories about his adventures in the sea and the princess caught herself falling for his world … and for him. They promised each other never to be apart again so they decided to meet in secret. _

_Each time they were together their love grew a little more until one day the king caught them. He forced the pirate to abandon his land and locked the princess in a tower. _

_Driven by sadness, the princess ripped off her heart and threw it into the sea. The king, desperate to have his daughter's heart back, announced that the man who found the princess's heart would marry her and would be paid in gold. _

_When the pirate knew about what had happened he began to search for the heart. He searched for it day and night until one day he saw a red heart, floating on the water. He didn't think twice and jumped out of the ship. _

_He started to swim, trying to reach the heart but, as much as he tried, the heart was always too far away from him. He was exhausted but he didn't stop swimming. Hours later he finally reached the heart. He felt so relieved that he didn't realize that he was holding the heart with too much strength. His eyes looked to his hands and he had never felt so much pain as he felt in that moment when the princess's heart broke in his strong hands. _

_Feeling his heart bleeding inside his chest he ripped it out and crushed it, letting his body disappear in the arms of the ocean…"_

"… _and that's why, my dear friends, pirates aren't supposed to fall in love with princesses" – Killian said after telling to his crew the tale of the "Princess's curse" – "A princess's heart is too weak for a man with the ocean running in his veins and because of that she will bring you nothing but misery..." – he continued to say after drinking his beer – "Besides, why go through all that pain when there are countless other women out there without the power to curse you?"_

_The men made a toast and_ _laughed. Many of them were already drunk._

"_Story time is over" – Killian said – "Go back to work!"_

_He returned to the captain's quarter and sat on the bed, closing his eyes._

"_So… Captain" – he heard a voice saying and smiled – "What if __**I **__was a princess?"_

"_What about it?" – he asked, opening his eyes._

"_Would you have fallen in love with me?" – Milah asked with a seductive voice, approaching him._

_He remained a few seconds in silence looking at her before answering._

"_No …" – he started to say, watching the way her mouth opened ready to protest – "because if you were a princess" – he continued – "I wouldn't have met you in that ugly bar"_

"_Why? I could have been there" – she protested._

"_Royalty doesn't like rum" – he said – "So, no, you wouldn't be there and I wouldn't have met you"_

"_I'm glad I'm not a princess then" – she said, sitting on his lap._

"_So am I" – Killian said, leaning his head so he could kiss her._

"_Just one more thing" – she said before he could reach her lips._

"_Milah …" – he pleaded, trying to kiss her. She laughed and touched his lips with her finger._

"_Promise me something" – she said. He remained in silence, waiting for her to continue – "Promise me that you will never fall in love with a princess"_

"_I thought you had heard the story, love …" – he said – "Pirates aren't supposed to fall in love with princesses"_

"_Promise me, Killian!" – Milah insisted._

"_Why would I want to fall in love with a princess if I'm in love with you?" – he said, trying to kiss her._

"_As much as I love to hear you say that …" – she teased him, leaning her face to him, almost reaching his lips – "that didn't sound like a promise" – she murmured._

"_Fine, I promise. I won't fall in love with a princess…" – he said, making her smile – "except if her hair is blonde" – he teased – "in that case I will definitely fall for her"_

"_Hey!" – Milah said, punching him in the arm._

"_I'm kidding, I'm kidding" – Killian said laughing._

"_That is not funny!" – she said – "I'm trying to have a serious conversation!"_

"_Sorry love…" – Killian said, stroking her hair._

"_Promise me, Killian" – she insisted – "Promise me"_

"_I promise" – he murmured before he kissed her._

Milah … As soon as he said her name she took a step forward and cupped his face with both of her hands, not giving him another moment to respond, bringing her mouth to his.

He didn't even have time to react when she reached her lips and started to kiss him. It all happened too fast. One second he was looking at a ghost and the next she was kissing him – the woman who made him in a heartless pirate obsessed with revenge.

He could feel her lips on his lips and her tongue seeking immediate entrance, forcing his mouth to open so their tongues could meet again after three hundred years. He was incapable of controlling his body and without even realizing he opened his mouth so he could deepen their kiss.

Milah's hands were now on his hair, on the back of his neck, trying to pull him closer, needing the distance that was between them to disappear. His body betrayed him once more and he groaned as the kiss deepened. He could feel Milah lacing her fingers into his hair and his own hands grasped at her waist with hunger … but then, suddenly, something inside of him woke up – images of a sleepy face buried in his bare chest and blonde hair tickling his nose; the sound of a beautiful laugh; the taste of soft lips … Emma.

He opened his eyes and looked at the woman who was kissing him. He grabbed her arms and pulled her away from him.

"Stop…" – his voice barely above a whisper.

"You have no idea how much I've missed you, Killian …" – she spoke for the first time, taking a step forward so she could touch him again.

"Don't …" – he managed to say, stepping away from her – "You … how … how is this possible? How are you here?" – he tried to say, running his hands through his hair.

"Shhh …" – she said, reaching his lips with her fingers – "I know this can be a big shock right now but … it doesn't matter, I'm here now. We're together"

"Of course it matters" – Killian said, trying to hide the trembling in his voice – "I thought you were dead! I mourned you! For three hundred years my life was nothing but pain!" – he exclaimed, taking her hands from his face.

He could feel his heart beating faster than ever. Nothing had prepared him for that and as much as he tried to process all that was happening, he couldn't. It was all too unreal for him to believe it; to understand it.

"I know that but I'm here now and –" – Milah tried to say.

"Milah … I saw you dying right in front of me" – he interrupted her – "I saw you dead"

"I was never dead" – she said.

"What?" – Killian said so low that he wasn't sure she had heard him.

"You had to believe it. It was the only way" – Milah said.

"The only way for what?" – he asked, raising his voice, incapable of controlling his nerves.

"For _him_ to believe it!" – she yelled back – "Rumpelstiltskin! He had to believe that I was dead, it was the only way for us to be free; to be together!"

"Together?" – Killian said, faking a laugh – "You have any idea –"

"Do you remember the day he found you?" – Milah interrupted him – "You didn't tell me about your duel with him but I heard some of the men talking about it and I knew it was a matter of time for him to find out the truth about us" – she started to explain – "That night, when all were sleeping I went to see an old woman, known in the village for her powers. I begged for her help" – Killian opened his mouth to speak but she cut him off – "She told me about an ancient spell used to fake someone's death. It was a temporary spell. I could have really died if he hadn't crushed my heart during the time of the spell … but in the end everything went as planned"

Killian remained in silence incapable of speaking. It all looked like a nightmare and he wished nothing but to wake up.

"I thought that when the spell ended I would go back to the place where I had been killed but instead I went back to the place where the spell had been performed – the witch's house" – she tried to explain, seeing Killian's reaction – "When I woke up I searched for you but I couldn't find you anywhere. You had disappeared" – she continued to explain – "Some men told me that they had seen a ship disappearing into the sea and that's when I realized that you had used the magic bean"

Silence invaded the room. Killian was paralyzed. It was all too unreal for him to believe it; he didn't want to believe it. He didn't want to revive all that had happened years ago. He didn't want his old life back, not now, not anymore.

"Please say something" – Milah's words interrupted his thoughts.

"Three hundred years, Milah" – Killian started to say, looking at her – "Do you know how long three hundred years is? I mourned you like a mad man. I sought to avenge you. For three hundred years you never left my damned mind" – he said raising his voice – "I thought you were dead and now you tell me that, during all that time you've been alive? Why didn't you do something? Why didn't you try to reach me? Why didn't you tell me about your plan?" – Milah tried to speak but Killian spoke again – "You tricked me! You made me look like a fool! You bought the Jolly …"

"I tried to find you, Killian" – she said – "And I did find you … I just … It wasn't the right moment for us to meet …" – she explained, trying to touch him but he took a step back, avoiding the contact – "I never stopped loving you and I know that even after all these years you –"

Suddenly, before Milah could finish the sentence a disturbing thought invaded Killian's mind.

_After all these years._

"How are you still alive?" – he asked – "You've never been in Neverland … How do you look exactly the same after three hundred years?"

"It was the spell" – Milah said – "Some spells require some specific ingredients, specially the old ones" – she explained – "For the spell to work my life had to be linked to another life so I could remain alive during my _fake death_. The witch told me that that effect would be permanent but to be honest I didn't care" – she said smiling – "My life is linked to yours"

Killian almost lost his balance and instinctively put his hand over his chest, above his heart.

"What? That is not possible" – he murmured.

"It is. As long as you live, I live too" – Milah said – "During all this time I had time to learn a little bit more about magic" – she added – "It can be very tricky but it can also be very useful" – she said, snapping her fingers, showing an old mirror on the wall – "I used to spend hours looking at you" – she said, approaching the mirror.

"You have magic?" – Killian asked in disbelief.

"Three hundred years is a long time, Killian" – she said – "How do you think I bought this ship? How do you think I managed to find a magic bean? How do you think I knew the exact time to find you?"

"You're the one who sent the mermaid" – Killian said. It wasn't a question. It was all starting to make sense.

"Actually it was a siren" – Milah said, turning her attention to him – "A waste of time. That fish was incapable of doing a simple task. I mean … how hard it is to conjure a storm and kidnap a man?"

"You're completely mad …" – Killian murmured, looking at her like he was looking at a stranger – "You could have killed us all!" – he exclaimed.

"I just wanted you" – she said – "I had to find a way to reach you, _only you_. People can't know that I'm alive yet. Not when we're so close to have everything we ever wanted"

"Everything we ever wanted?" – he repeated her words – "What are you talking about?"

"It's all about timing, my love" – she said, reducing the distance between them – "Soon, we'll no longer have to hide in the shadows. We'll be indestructible. Soon, we'll finally be together forever"

"It's been three hundred years" – Killian tried to explain – "A lot has changed. You can't expect things to be as they were three hundred years ago…"

"Because of Emma?" – she asked, saying Emma's name like it was poison.

"How do you know about Emma?" – he asked, feeling immediately protective over Emma.

"I know a lot of things, Killian" – Milah said – "Whatever your feelings for her are … they aren't real. You're living a lie"

He wanted to laugh at her words. _You're living a lie_. His past was the lie, not his present, not his future.

"No" – he said looking at her – "The only lie I lived was the life before I met her" – he stated.

"We'll see about that" – Milah said.

Before he could even reply, two men appeared in the room.

"I'll tell you the rest of the story tomorrow. John and Thomas will lead you to the brig" – she said – "Oh, and Killian" – she added after giving the men the orders – "I would hate to make your friends walk the plank for knowing too much"

* * *

He wanted to return to the room as soon as the men dragged him out of it. He needed to know more about what was happening; he needed more information.

His head was a mess. His entirely life had been a lie. It was like waking up from a dream he thought it was real.

He knew there had to be more about this story than just what Milah told him. Her appearance couldn't be a coincidence.

_It's all about timing_. Why now? Why didn't she reveal herself sooner? It had to be a reason; a very strong reason.

The worst part was that he couldn't share his thoughts with anyone. He couldn't tell David or Robin what happened; who the _Captain_ was. He would have to lie to them.

"Finally!" – David exclaimed as soon as he entered in the brig – "What took you so long? We were about to go search for you!"

"Always so worried about me" – Killian said, faking a smile, trying to remain calm.

"What happened? What did the Captain want?" – Robin asked approaching him – "Who is this _Captain_?"

"No one to be concern about" – he lied – "His name is James"

"James?" – David asked – "Please tell me he doesn't look like me"

"Why would he look like you?" – Robin asked confused.

"I had a twin brother and his name was James" – David started to explain – "I never met him but from the stories I've heard he had a very twisted mind, so he could very well be the responsible for all this mess" – he explained – "but he's dead and dead people don't buy ships, right?"

"Aye" – Killian softly said, trying not to think about Milah.

"What's his last name?" – David asked.

"Hmm … Parker" – Killian lied again – "James Parker"

"So … what did you talk about?" – Robin asked.

"Many things … pirate things" – he said, clearing his throat. The men waited for him to continue – "The Jolly, the sea …"

"Killian, are you okay?" – David interrupted him, touching his shoulder – "You don't look like yourself. If something happened…"

"I'm fine, a little bit tired, that's all" – he said walking towards his cell. He had to increase the distance between them. It was easier to lie if he didn't have to look at them – "We should rest"

"Wait!" – Robin said – "Did he say something about Storybrooke? Can we trust him?"

Killian looked at his friends. They were waiting for his answer with hope in their eyes. He felt like the worse person in the world for lying to them, but lying was better than to see them dead.

"Yes, we can trust him" – Killian said, forcing a smile – "He just wants to buy some provisions for his next travel. Nothing to worry about" – he added, before lying down in bed.

Robin and David looked at each other, speaking without words. Something wasn't right.

"Killian –" – Robin tried to say.

"Tomorrow" – they heard Killian say from his cell – "We'll talk tomorrow"

* * *

Emma was at home looking at the television, pretending to be watching a cooking show. As much as she tried not to think about what happened hours ago, she couldn't.

All this time she had tried to remain positive and not to think about the possibility of the men being dead and now she knew that they weren't. They were alive. She might not know where they were but she knew they were alive somewhere. She just had to find them.

She didn't want to go to her bed, not when she knew Killian wouldn't be there. She had slept alone for many years but now the thought of sleeping alone was unbearable.

The reason why the locator spells didn't work was still a mystery. Emma was not a specialist in magic but seeing the Dark One as clueless as she scared her.

Were they too out of reach? Were they being victims of some magic? Could some force being blocking the spells?

"You're still up?" – Henry's voice interrupted her thoughts.

"What are you doing here?" – Emma asked – "You're supposed to be sleeping"

"I can't sleep" – he said, sitting next to her.

"Do you want to talk about it?" – Emma asked, caressing his hair.

"Talking about it doesn't change anything" – Henry said with a sad voice.

Emma looked at her son. She hated seeing him like that – hurt, sad, hopeless.

"Well, I have something to say to you" – she said with a small smile – "Gold helped Regina and I performing a spell so we could know for sure if Killian, David and Robin were alive …" – Henry looked at her with his big brown eyes, waiting for her to continue – "And they are. They are alive, kid"

Henry immediately hugged her, wrapping his arms around her belly and Emma could feel his smile on her abdomen.

"I knew it, mom. I knew it" – he said – "They are heroes and heroes always win; good always wins" – he said releasing Emma from the embrace – "Where are they?"

"We don't know it yet" – she said looking at him – "We're still trying to figure it out why the locator spells don't work"

"That's why you didn't tell me, right?" – Henry suddenly said –"You thought the locator spells didn't work because they could be dead, wasn't it?"

"Yes" – Emma admitted – "I was afraid that that was the reason why the spells didn't work. I'm sorry I didn't tell you … I was just trying to –"

"I understand mom, really" – Henry interrupted her – "Where do you think they are?" – he asked, leaning his head on her shoulder.

"I don't know, kid ... I just hope they're safe" – Emma said.

* * *

**The next morning**

"Why can't we go too?" – David almost yelled when four men appeared in the brig to escort Killian to the Captain's quarters, again.

After two nights without sleeping, David and Robin immediately fell asleep as soon as they lay down in bed but not Killian. How could he after all that happened? He needed to know more; he needed to know the rest of the story.

The men were still asleep when the pirates came searching for Killian. David and Robin protested when two men grabbed their friend and leaded him out of the brig. The two other pirates remained in the brig, preventing them to leave.

When Killian entered in the room Milah was seated on the bed, looking at him.

"I hope you slept well, my love" – she said approaching him, trying to touch his face.

"Don't" – he said grabbing her hand before she could touch him – "I want to know why. Why now?"

She smiled at him before turning her back, grabbing a bottle of rum.

"Care for a drink?" – she asked after her lips touched the bottle.

"We both know I'm not here for a drink" – he said stiffly.

"No. You're here to fall in love with me all over again" – Milah seductively said.

"Why are you here now? Why did you decide to appear now?" – Killian asked, ignoring her words – "What changed?"

"Don't you see? Nothing changed, that's why I'm here" – she said trying to touch him again – "That's why I found you"

"You didn't find me. You kidnapped me!" – he exclaimed.

"Kidnapped you? I thought I had told my men to inform you that I intend to help you go back to Storybrooke, safe and sound"

"What do you know about Storybrooke?" – Killian asked.

"That's part of the rest of the story, my love" – Milah softly said.

Killian remained in silence waiting for her to continue.

"Are you sure you don't want a drink?" – she said shaking the bottle. He ignored her – "You used to be more fun, Killian"

He could see the sun shining outside the window. It was a beautiful day but the place where he was stuck was anything but beautiful.

"When you were in Neverland I didn't have the power I have now. I didn't know a way to get to you" – Milah started to explain – "During all that time I decided to learn magic so I could find you; so I could be stronger; so no one would dare to try to kill me again" – she said the last sentence with anger in her voice – "I learned a lot of magic. You could say I got addicted to it. I used to watch you, using that mirror" – she said pointing at the mirror on the wall – "When you returned from Neverland I already had enough magic to reach you, in fact, I had three magic beans that I could had used but then … I found something and –"

"So you're saying that you had the chance to tell me that you were alive; that you could have reached me but you chose not to because you found _something_" – he interrupted her faking a laugh, running his hand through his hair.

"It's not just something!" – she tried to explain – "It's a prophecy …"

"A prophecy" – Killian repeated her words – "What has a prophecy to do with any of this; with me?"

"It has everything to do with you!" – Milah exclaimed.

"And why is that?" – Killian asked, preparing himself for another lie.

Milah remained in silence before speaking again, trying to decide if she should share the information or not.

"The prophecy says that someday the savior will have a child" – she began to say and Killian tensed when he heard the word _savior_ – "That child will be very special because its heart will have many powers"

"I already know that" – Killian said as Henry's face invaded his mind. The boy had the heart of the truest believer – "And don't you dare to hur –"

"I'm not talking about Henry" – Milah interrupted him and Killian tensed – "Like the sea is eternal, the child's heart will be immortal" – she said like she was reading some old book about legends and prophecies – "Because the child's mother is the savior and the father has the sea running into his veins, the child's heart will have the power of immortality; the power to save and cure; the power to concede an eternal life to anyone capable of ripping its heart out of its chest and perform the _undying spell. _Contrary to most people, as soon as the heart leaves its body the child will immediately die, like a wave that dies on the sand every time it tries to abandon the sea" – she finished the prophecy – "You're the father, Killian. Your blood is made of sea. You found the savior. You two will create a child with the power that everyone desires"

"No …" – he murmured, not wanting to believe what he had just heard – "I don't believe you. That is not possible"

"It is!" – Milah said, taking a step forward – "This prophecy was written in the beginning of all times, my love. It was made for people like us to fulfil it so we can live forever. That's why I'm here. The time for the prophecy to happen is now. That's why you have to go back to Storybrooke. That's why I wanted to find you … to warn you"

"To warn me?" – Killian exclaimed – "I don't want this. I don't want any of this … How could you ever think that I would agree with your twisted plan?"

"Killian, it's a small price to pay for an eternal life" – Milah said – "Magic always comes with a price, you know that"

"A small price?" – he yelled not able to control his anger – "It's a baby, Milah … You want to kill a baby so you can live forever?"

"So _we_ can live forever" – she corrected him.

Killian remained in silence looking at the woman he once loved, seeing anything but that woman. The Milah he remembered was gone.

"The prophecy is not going to happen" – he said breaking the silence.

"You can't fight destiny and destiny wants this to happen" – Milah stated.

"Apparently your destiny was to die on this ship but clearly you didn't so…" – Killian said.

"My destiny is to be with you and the prophecy will make sure of that" – she said.

"This prophecy will never happen because that baby will never exist" – Killian said, trying to hide the nervousness in his voice.

"You always wanted to be a father, Killian" – Milah said with a smile – "After the prophecy is fulfilled you can be. You can have a child that will live forever; you can have a son"

"I already have a son" – Killian stated.

Milah started to laugh after hearing Killian's words.

"Really, Killian? Bae's son? My grandson? Actually he could almost be considered your grandson" – she said still laughing – "That boy will never be your son and do you want to know why? Because he doesn't sees you like a father, only like an obstacle who stood between Emma and Baelfire; the man who destroyed the chance of his parents being together; the man who destroyed his family"

"Shut up!" – he yelled.

"The only reason destiny allowed you and Emma to be together was for the prophecy to happen" – she continued to say – "You two don't belong together. All happens for a reason and in your case the reason is the prophecy, not love"

"You don't know what you're talking about" – Killian said – "You don't know me … not anymore"

"Oh, I do know you Killian … because you and I are the same" – Milah said, grabbing his hand, exposing the tattoo with her name – "This is the proof of your love for me and no one will ever change that, not even a blonde distraction … and this hook" – she said, touching the hook – "This is the proof of the sacrifice you did for me, for us" – she added.

"No … you don't kno –" – Killian tried to say.

"I'm curious, what is it about her that is so special that caught the Captain Hook's attention, despite the prophecy, of course" – she interrupted him, grabbing the bottle of rum again – "It's because she's royalty … because she's a princess? I thought you didn't like princesses, Killian … wait, it's because she is the Saviouuuuuur, isn't it?"

Killian wanted to ignore her words but he felt the need to speak what his heart was yelling inside his chest.

"No … I don't love her because she's a princess or the Savior, I _love_ …" – he started to say but suddenly he felt something pushing him to the ground and all went black before he could finish his sentence.

… _I love her because she's Emma._

* * *

**I know there's a lot of Killian and Milah in this chapter but it was necessary to reveal some of the mysteries of this story.**

**This idea about a prophecy and Milah and a baby and all of this stuff came into my mind and I knew I had to write a story about it. I hope you're not getting too confused ... I'm trying my best to explain all of it in a simple way and next chapters will reveal more details about the characters and all the mess that is happening.**

**I really hope you're liking this story and thank you so much for the reviews!**

**I love you guys! (:**


	9. home

**Thanks for being so patient. I've missed writing this story so much but finding the time to write has been unbelievable difficult. You guys have been absolutely awesome. Thank you so much for your support; it's for you!**

* * *

_The past is full of life, eager to irritate us, provoke and insult us, tempt us to destroy or repaint it_ — Milan Kundera

* * *

"So let me get this straight" – Regina began to say – "You're planning on get inside of a _boat _without knowing how to sail a _boat, _so you can start some kind of suicide mission?" – she continued to say, pacing restlessly around the room.

"I'm not going to stay here doing nothing" – Emma said, rising from the couch – "We have already lost too much time"

"Did you miss the part that you don't know how to sail a boat?" – Regina said, throwing her arms in the air.

"I watched Killian do it many times" – Emma said, trying to sound confident – "I think I know how to do it"

The two women were at Regina's house trying to figure it out a way to find their loved ones. They tried to perform some locator spells but none of them worked, so Emma suggested that they should start to think about a plan that didn't involve using magic.

"Do you really think your mother will agree to this?" – Regina asked.

"No" – Emma softly said – "But she doesn't need to know. I don't want her to know" – she added – "There's no need for her to get worried"

"You can't go" – Regina stated – "Much less in your condition"

Emma was about to complain about the reference of her condition but chose just to roll her eyes.

"I'm going and there's nothing that you can do or say that it's going to change my mind" – Emma said not leaving room for discussion.

"Emma, I'm not letting you go on some suicide mission" – Regina insisted.

"It's not a suicide mission" – Emma tried to explain, sitting on the couch again – "It's a plan. Is it perfect? No, but what plan is?" – she continued to say – "This may be the only chance we have to find them. We already know that they are out there somewhere. Please, Regina, you have to let me try"

Regina remained in silence looking at her friend, trying to figure it out a way to make her see reason, but deep down she knew Emma was right. Using magic was no longer an option. They needed to act before it was too late.

Suddenly memories of Robin and she invaded her mind.

She was supposed to be planning her wedding, taking care of the little details, choosing the flowers for her bouquet … but she was doing anything but that.

Storybrooke was supposed to be a safe place now that all the villains were defeated; a place where she could finally build her happy ending.

"Okay" – Regina finally said, breaking the silence – "When do we leave?"

"_We_?" – Emma asked, still processing Regina's words – "No, you're not coming"

"Someone has to take care of you" – she simply said – "_Both of you_ … and Robin is out there too…"

"I thought you were not going to help me on my _suicide mission_" – Emma said, emphasizing the last two words.

"Well … that's the thing, Miss Swan" – she started to say – "With my help you may not end up dead" – Regina teased and Emma couldn't help a smile.

"Thanks" – she said still smiling.

"We need to start packing and come up with some cover story to justify our absence" – Regina said – "And obviously we still need to be one hundred per cent sure that you do know, in fact, how to sail a boat –"

"No, we have to go _now_" – Emma interrupted her – "I'll call Henry and Mary Margaret and-"

"We need provisions Emma" – Regina spoke, trying to put some sense on Emma's mind – "We need to figure it out things here first and then we can go"

Emma wanted to leave as soon as possible. She wanted to end with this nightmare so things could return to normal and for that to happen her family needed to be complete again.

"We leave at sunset" – Emma said before leaving Regina's house.

* * *

He opened his eyes slowly, raising his arm and feeling his head hurt as he touched it. The last thing he remembered before falling asleep was the need of saying Emma's name, but for some reason her name never left his lips.

"What happened?" – Killian mumbled, still trying to open his eyes, realizing that he was seated on an old chair.

"You're awake" – Milah said, taking her eyes from the book she was reading so she could look at him.

"What happened?" – Killian repeated confused. He looked around the room, quickly realizing that they weren't in the Captain's quarters anymore. They were in another room – "Why are we in another room? What did you do?"

"I needed to confirm some information" – she said closing the book she was holding in her hands – "And obviously I couldn't leave you all alone in that room, so…"

Killian looked once more around the room, this time noticing the little details. The room was full of books and small boxes and, for some reason, Killian felt a strange feeling as he examined the amount of boxes in the shelves. He took his eyes from the shelves and looked at the woman in front of him.

"What did you do to me?" – he asked, starting to remember their last conversation before all went black.

"You could say that jealousy got the best of me" – she started to say – "I had to knock you out with some little spell before you could say something you would regret later"

"You did what?" – Killian said, narrowing his eyes – "What is wrong with you?"

"What is wrong with me? What is wrong with _you_!" – she shouted back – "Did you really think that I was just let you talk about your feelings for another woman? Did you really think that I would listen to that and do nothing?"

"Is that such a big surprise hearing me say that?" – Killian asked – "Didn't you watch me during all this time?"

"I can't see you when you are in Storybrooke" – Milah stated – "There is too many magic interference in that town" – she said, pacing the room – "Regardless, I don't need to have access to what happens in Storybrooke to know that your so called feelings for her are just an illusion so the prophecy can happen"

"Stop talking about that bloody thing!" – Killian exclaimed, rising from his chair.

"You have to face the truth, Killian …" – Milah stated.

"No, you're the one who has to face the truth, Milah!" – he said – "This whole idea of yours about a magic baby made you blind"

"I'm anything but blind" – she yelled

"But you are, Milah … power made you blind, anger made you blind, magic made you blind" – Killian tried to explain so she could see reason – "You know who I see when I look at you? I see _him _… you look just like _him_"

"I'm nothing like him!" – Milah said with fury in her voice – "He's a coward and soon I'm going to destroy him; we are going to destroy him" – she added.

"My business with him is over" – he said – "Vengeance won't bring back your old life, Milah, it only turns you into a different person, a worse person" – Killian tried to explain –"Just let it go, move on, start a new life"

"You really don't get it, do you?" – Milah said – "I don't want to move on" – she said approaching him.

"Milah …" – he started to explain – "You and I … it's not going to happen again … we can't go back to what we were" – Killian said – "I don't want to go back to what we were"

Milah remained in silence looking at his deep blue eyes and then she sat on one of the chairs in the room and opened the book she was reading while Killian had been unconscious.

He looked at her confused and waited a few moments for her to say something but she continued with her eyes focused on the book.

"You're not going to say anything?" – he asked, breaking the silence – "You're just going to remain in silence reading some old book?"

"No" – she said without looking at him – "I'm just going to wait for you to realize who you really are"

"And who would that be?" – Killian asked, feeling exhausted.

"A pirate" – she said – "The man I fell in love with"

Killian was used of being teased by Emma about being a pirate, but when he heard Milah saying that word it was like the word gained a total different meaning. She was not talking about the pirate who had become a hero, or the pirate who believed in good form. She was talking about the obsessive pirate with a rotten heart.

"And I'm going to wait for you to realize that, no matter how much time it takes" – Milah's voice interrupted his thoughts.

"This plan of yours is not going to work, you know?" – Killian started to say – "My family is going to find me, all of us"

"I doubt that" – she said, closing the book.

"You clearly don't know who you're dealing with" – Killian said remembering David's words: _That's what this family does, we find people. And we always do because we really don't like to give up._

"I'm not saying that they won't try to find you" – Milah said – "I'm just saying that they won't succeed" – she added smiling. Killian remained in silence trying to understand Milah's words – "Did you really think that it would be that easy? I mean … I had almost three hundred years to build this plan …"

"What's that supposed to mean?" – Killian asked, trying not to sound nervous.

"It means that they can try to perform any kind of locator spell that exists in this entire world that none of them will work" – she said with a proud smile on her face – "I used an old spell specially made to block any kind of locator spell that someone tries to use on you and on your two new best friends" – Milah explained – "As you can see no one is going to find you unless I allow them"

"She's going to find a way" – Killian replied through gritted teeth.

"Perhaps …" – Milah said getting up from the chair – "But maybe when she does it will be too late" – she said archly – "Who knows, maybe her father…"

"Leave David and Robin out of this" – he interrupted her before she could finish her sentence – "Let them go, just let them go, I'll stay with you …"

"You will, just not right now" – Milah said – "First we need to fulfill the prophecy and I have to be sure that you're still the Killian that I remember" – she added, grabbing one of the boxes of the shelf.

She opened the box and Killian could not believe in what his eyes were seeing – a heart. Suddenly it all started to make sense: the strange behavior of the crew that looked more like puppets than like pirates, the reason why the men never mentioned Milah's name, the feeling he had when the old man was speaking to him on the island like he already knew him… She was controlling them, everywhere and every time.

"Should I order some drinks?" – she asked holding the heart on her hands.

Killian was about to complain but then he decided to play his part on convincing Milah that he was still a pirate. This was clearly the first of many tests and he didn't intend to fail, especially when failing could mean hurting people he cared about. He nodded and Milah started to talk to the heart, a few moments later a man entered in the room with a bottle of wine and two glasses.

"Do you want to see some of the ingredients that I have stored in these shelves?" – she asked as she looked at the shelf full of boxes

Killian approached her and grabbed the bottle of wine that the crew man had brought. The man was on the other side of the room lighting some candles.

Killian was now behind Milah but she was so focused on the boxes in front of her that she didn't even notice Killian raising his arm, hitting her with the bottle of wine right in her head. Milah fell to the ground dropping the heart she was still holding, letting it fall too.

The crew man immediately stopped what he was doing and started to run towards Killian but he quickly grabbed the heart that was still beating near Milah's unconscious body.

The man was trying to reach his sword when Killian spoke:

"Drop the sword" – he quickly said.

"Is not like I have a choice, is it?" – the man said, dropping the sword.

Killian looked at the heart and then to the man in front of him.

"What's your name?" – he asked.

"Thomas" – the man said.

"Contrarily to what you may think, Thomas, control you is not on my priority list right now" – Killian said – "What do you say about making a deal?"

"What kind of a deal?" – he asked suspicious.

"You help me and my friends get back to our land and in exchange I give you your heart back" – Killian explain.

"Why should I trust you? How do I know that you will not break the deal once you reach land?" – the man asked.

"Well, for starters I could have crushed your heart the moment you tried to reach for your sword and attack me but I didn't, does that not count for anything?" – he sarcastically asked – "What happened to good form and the bloody pirate code?"

The man remained in silence looking at Killian, analyzing his options.

"Even if you give me back my heart I won't be able to put it back on my chest … I don't have magic" – he said – "She's the only one who can give me my freedom" – Thomas said, pointing at Milah.

"She's not the only one who has magic in this world" – Killian said – "I give you my word that once we reach my land I'll find a way to put your heart in the right place again"

"What do I have to do?" – he asked.

"Tell the rest of the crew what I just told you, once you do that and they agree (and trust me they would be stupid if they didn't), release my friends and meet me here so we can make a plan and reach land" – Killian said – "Do you know if we are too far away from a land named Storybrooke?"

"We are actually pretty close" – Thomas said – "The Captain gave us the coordinates to a land with that name but told us to stay in high sea"

"Finally good news" – Killian said as Thomas started to walk to the door. Before he could leave the room, Killian spoke again – "Thomas, wait …" – he said, reaching him – "I think this belongs to you" – he said, placing the man's heart in his hand.

"Why are you doing this" – Thomas asked, looking at the heart in his hand and the man in front of him.

"Because I think that actions speak louder than words" – Killian said – "Besides, I think it will be easier for you to convince the rest of the crew if you show them some proof of my _good form_"

Killian didn't know how much time had passed when he heard the sound of voices increasing but he was sure of one thing: during all the waiting he couldn't take his eyes from Milah's unconscious body. He couldn't explain exactly why. Maybe it was because he wanted to be sure that she didn't wake up; maybe it was because he was still trying to see some sign of the old Milah, some sign of hope, of kindness, of goodness.

He had wished, so many times, for a chance to have her again in his arms; for a chance to see her again; for a chance to hear her voice one more time … and now, all that he wished was that he had never wished that at all.

How would he explain all of this mess to David and Robin? How would he explain it to Emma? All he could feel was guilt. If he hadn't met her she wouldn't have to deal with all of this mess all over again. She would have the life that she deserved. She wouldn't have been cursed with some magical baby and the constant threat of it. Everything was finally well in Storybrooke and now, they would have to deal with another villain because he had brought the ghosts of his past to their lives.

"Killian, are you alright?" – Killian heard David's voice as soon as his friend entered in the room – "What is going on?"

Robin and Thomas were right behind David.

"Did they agree to help us?" – Killian asked Thomas, ignoring David's question.

"Yes" – Thomas said – "What about her? What are we going to do with her?" – he said pointing at Milah,

"Nothing … she's going to stay here" – Killian said.

"Stay here?" – Thomas asked confused – "But what if she wakes up? She has magic. She can kill us all"

"Not if we're not here anymore" – Killian simply said.

"You want to leave the ship" – Thomas said. It wasn't a question.

"We'll going to use the lifeboats" – Killian said – "and we're going to leave this ship behind"

"Can someone explain to me what is going on?" – David exclaimed – "Who the hell is she?" – he asked referring to Milah.

Thomas looked at Killian and then at Robin and David.

"I'm going to inform the men about the plan" – he said leaving the three men alone in the room.

"So?" – David insisted – "Are you going to tell us what is going on or not?"

"Her name is Milah" – Killian said, finally facing his friends. He noticed David's eyes widening – "We have to get out of here" – he added.

"Is she the Captain?" – David asked again. Killian opened his mouth to answer but David spoke again – "Of course she is …" – he said, running his hand through his hair – "You lied to us …" – he accused Killian, realizing who this Milah person was.

"David, I think we should get out of here first" – Robin tried to say.

"What else did you lie about, _Hook_?" – David said, ignoring Robin's words – "Did you know this whole time where the Jolly Roger was? Did you know these pirates? Is this some kind of twisted plan of yours?"

"How can you say that?" – Killian said, raising his voice – "Yes, I lied but it was only to protect you! She threatened to kill you if I told you the truth!" – he added.

Silence invaded the room. Robin wanted to say something constructive to break the heavy silence but no words came to his mouth.

"I thought you trusted me …" – Killian suddenly said – "I thought we were friends but it seems I'm just _Hook_ to you" – he said before leaving the room, leaving a speechless David behind.

Before they left the ship, the rest of the crew went to the room where Milah was still unconscious and searched for their hearts. Once every man found their hearts, Thomas led Killian, David and Robin to a small boat where two pirates were already aboard. The rest of the crew was divided in two groups, each one in one boat.

Robin could feel the tension between David and Killian; none of them opened the mouth since they left the room.

_Why couldn't they talk with each other like they used to? Why had David to be so harsh? _Deep down he knew the answer: he was hurt, and when people are hurt they say things that they don't mean.

They were on the boat for quite some time when Robin touched David's shoulder, trying to tell him that he should talk with Killian.

David looked at Killian's back. The pirate was on the other side of the boat, looking at the sea. He started to move in his direction and sat next to him. They remained in silence for a few seconds until David broke the silence.

"I'm sorry …" – he started to say – "for what I said back there, I shouldn't have doubted you"

"No, you shouldn't" – Killian said without looking at him.

"I was in shock … I mean, first we are hostages and then you're the leader of the whole crew" – David tried to explain.

"I'm not the leader of anything, David" – Killian said, still not looking at David – "I simply made a deal with them so we could return home"

David grabbed Killian's arm, making him turn his body and face him.

"Look, I _really_ am sorry for the way I talked to you" – David said, making sure that Killian was really listening to him – "I shouldn't have called you Hook because you're not Hook anymore. You're Killian and you're my friend"

Killian looked at his friend and then turned his attention back to the ocean. David sighed.

"You have every right to hate me. I understand" – David continued to say – "But I hated you before and we became friends so …"

"I don't hate you, Dave" – Killian said low.

"You're calling me Dave … I take that as a good sign" – David teased. Killian smiled – "So, how are you dealing with all of this?"

"I don't know" – he honestly said – "I thought she was dead. It's like all my memories are lies"

"Did she give you any explanation?" – David asked.

"She said she used some old spell to fake her own death and then she started to learn magic and now she's back and want us to be together again" – Killian said, not telling David about the prophecy.

"But why now?" – David asked – "Why did she appear after almost three hundred years? It must be a reason, right?"

"So, are the two of you friends again, or what?" – Robin said, saving Killian from telling another lie.

"What can I say, David can't resist my charm" – Killian said, trying to hide his discomfort.

"Right" – Robin said, rolling his eyes – "Can I hear the story too, or it's some big secret?"

Killian explained the story again, this time with a few more details, like the fact that his life was linked to Milah's and the way he was able to knock her out. Before any of them could ask him again about the reason why Milah had decided to appear just now he spoke again.

"I think we shouldn't tell Emma or anyone else about the Jolly Roger" – he said – "I think it's better if they don't know what happened"

"We can't keep this from them" – David said – "I doubt your dead wife is going to give up so easily"

"She was never my wife" – Killian corrected him.

"Details … the important thing is that they need to know; they need to be prepared" – David insisted.

"I don't want to involve Emma in this" – Killian said – "I don't want her to know about –"

"Milah" – Robin said – "You don't want her to know about Milah"

"Yes, I don't want her to know about her because I don't want her to worry … I don't want her to put her walls up again" – Killian explained –"We are building a life together, a life that I never thought I would want, but I do … I want it more than anything in the world" – he added – "Telling her about this will ruin everything"

"Killian, your life is linked to hers" – Robin reminded him – "You can't just ignore that"

"I know that, but don't you see it? If I tell Emma then this becomes real" – Killian declared like he was on denial.

"This is already real" – David said.

"Look, all I'm asking is for us to keep this as a secret for now" – Killian tried again – "We don't have to lie to them, we just have to hide some information" – he said, feeling already guilty for having those kind of thoughts – "We just tell them about the storm and the island and then we tell them that this men found us … we can pretend that they are fishermen"

"These men have their hearts out of their chests" – Robin said – "How are we going to explain that?"

"We aren't" – Killian stated.

"But didn't you make a deal with them?" – Robin asked again, trying to understand Killian's plan.

"Yes, I did" – Killian said – "That's why, once we arrive, I'm going to talk to Gold"

"You're going to talk to Gold?" – Robin asked in disbelief.

"Aye. It appears that our business is not over, after all" – he said already trying to figure it out how he would tell Gold the news.

* * *

"I still think this is a bad idea" – Regina said as they put their bags on the boat.

"I'm the Sheriff and you're the Mayor, technically we're not stealing the boat" – Emma said, getting aboard.

"I'm not talking about stealing the boat and you know it" – Regina replied – "Do you even know how to read a nautical chart?"

"Did you put all the bags on the boat?" – Emma asked, ignoring Regina's complaints – "It's almost sunset, we need to go before Mary Margaret decides to show up and ruin all of this plan"

As soon as she finished her sentence, her phone started to ring. It was Mary Margaret

"Speaking of" – she said to herself. She got out of the boat and went to the boat house.

Regina was already on the boat. She was at the bow of the boat looking at the ocean when suddenly she saw something on the water. At first she couldn't really tell what was it but then, she realized that three boats were approaching the docks.

"It can't be real" – she murmured to herself.

She searched for her phone and called Henry telling him to meet her at the docks and to bring Mary Margaret too. She looked around trying to see Emma but she was still inside of the boat house.

Regina got out of the boat and started to walk through the docks, trying to be as near as she could from the boats. She couldn't take her eyes from the boats, searching for a familiar face. She noticed that one of the boats was slower than the other two that were moving faster. Suddenly a voice made her heart beat faster than ever.

"Regina!" – she heard someone from the boat yelling. She tried to figure it out to which boat she should look when someone stood up from one of the boats and made her knees tremble. Robin.

She could feel the tears on her face and her whole body trembling. She put one of hands over her mouth, trying to stop crying but she couldn't. She closed her eyes, trying to calm herself and after a few moments she felt something wet touching her face. Regina opened her eyes and saw herself reflected in the most beautiful eyes that she had ever seen.

Before she could say something, Robin kissed her and she responded to the kiss immediately. She could feel his hands on her waist and smiled. When they finally pulled back Regina noticed that Robin was completely drenched.

"You're drenched" – she said smiling and crying at the same time.

"I couldn't wait any longer" – he said as their foreheads touched.

"That's your excuse for jumping overboard?" – Regina teased.

"I missed you" – Robin murmured.

"I missed you more" – she said, feeling the tears appearing in her eyes, again.

"That's not possible" – he said, cleaning the tears from Regina's face.

"It is" – she replied – "When I saw the remains of the boat … I, I thought you were dead" – Regina said, trying to hide the trembling in her voice.

"I would never leave you alone at the altar" – Robin said, caressing her face, trying to make her laugh.

"No comedic timing, at all" – Regina said, smiling at the same time.

Robin opened his mouth to speak but was interrupted.

"I think my mom is about to show up. We need to hide the bags from the boat before she finds out about –" – Emma didn't finish her sentence. She was looking at Robin like she was seeing a ghost – "Robin … how, how are you …"

She saw some movement behind Regina and Robin and then she saw her father running towards her. Before she could even react, her father wrapped his arms around her and hugged her tight.

"Oh thank God, Emma" – he breathed – "Are you okay?"

"Are you?" – she asked smiling – "I can't believe you're really here … how … what, what happened?" – Emma nervously asked – "Dad, I thought …"

"I know, honey" – David said, caressing her hair – "I know"

Emma didn't know how much time she hugged her father. All that she knew was that she missed him and the way he always was able to calm her down just by caressing her hair.

"I need to call mom" – Emma said, releasing herself from the embrace – "She needs to know… and …" – she started to search for her mother's name when suddenly something inside of her woke up – "Dad, where is Killian? Why isn't he here?" – she nervously asked and almost froze.

David was about to reply when Mary Margaret appeared. Henry was already talking with Regina and Robin.

Emma was used to the public demonstration of affection of her parents but seeing them and Robin and Regina reunited made her heart ache. Her family was back and she was feeling more alone than ever.

Why wasn't he there? She was trying to fight the tears that were starting to appear in her eyes but the pain inside her chest was so strong that it was like she couldn't breathe anymore.

The sun had almost disappeared in the ocean but when the last sun ray started to say goodbye, Emma saw the last light of the day illuminating him.

She didn't even have time to think twice. Her legs started to move faster than ever because distance between them was simply not a possibility, it had never been. She jumped into his arms and in a blink of an eye, Emma's body collided against Killian's firmer one. She wrapped her arms around his neck and burrowed her face against his shoulder. Killian felt her tears staining his shirt and her body trembling against his chest.

Emma's legs were wrapped around his waist. He pulled her even closer, tightening his hold around her as he took in the smell of her hair and skin, feeling that a huge weight had been lifted from his chest after a week without her.

They remained like this for a long time. Their silence only interrupted by Emma's sobs.

"Killian" – she tried to say, increasing her sobs.

"Sssh, love" – Killian softly said, caressing her hair – "It's okay … I'm here"

Another sob immediately raked her whole body and he felt Emma shaking her head against him.

"I tried to find you … I did …" – Emma said with a trembling voice – "but I couldn't …" – she said, lifting her head so she could look at him.

The sight of her red and tired eyes was like a knife through his heart. He had seen her hurt and sad but he had never seen the amount of pain and guilt that was now plaguing her beautiful face.

"This wasn't your fault" – he gently said, putting a strand of hair behind her ear – "None of this was your fault"

"I thought I had lost you …" – Emma said gripping on the thin material of his shirt, bringing him even closer.

"You didn't" – Killian said, looking right into her green eyes – "You won't, I promise"

Her fearful gaze met Killian's deep blue eyes. She crashed her lips against his making sure that he was really there, that he wasn't an illusion. There was so much more that she still needed to tell him but right now, all that she wanted to do was to show him how much she had missed him.

A few seconds later she left his lips and gasped for air. They looked around the docks expecting to see the eyes of their family on them but there was no one else around.

"It seems they gave us some privacy, shocking" – Killian said touching Emma's nose with his own, making her smile.

"Let's go home" – she said and Killian smiled.

When Emma and Killian entered in the house, Henry jumped from the couch and ran towards Killian, hugging him tight. He had wanted to do that at the docks but Regina told him to wait just a few more minutes and let Emma and Killian have their moment.

"I've missed you" – Henry said.

For a second, Killian was taken aback by Henry's words but then, almost unconsciously he brought him even closer.

"I've missed you too" – he said.

"Can you tell me one of your stories before I fall a sleep?" – Henry softly asked.

"Of course" – Killian said – "I've missed our story time" – he added.

"Me too"

After he put Henry to sleep, Killian went to his and Emma's room. She was lying in bed with her eyes closed. He made his way towards her and lay down next to her, trying not to wake her.

"I used to sleep on your side of the bed" – she said, opening her eyes.

He wrapped his arms around her body and pulled her closer to him so they were both on his side of the bed.

"This version is better" – Emma said, burying her head on his chest. After a few seconds she spoke again – "We need to talk"

"I know …" – he murmured, feeling his heart race because he was not ready to hide things from her; he was not ready to lie – "Do you mind if we talk tomorrow?"

"No, it's fine … We have time" – Emma said, caressing his face – "You must be tired" – she added before kissing him.

Killian knew that Emma would want to talk; she wouldn't be Emma if she didn't. He also knew that she was pretty good at finding out when he was lying so he really needed to find a way to make her believe in him.

As much as he hated himself for not telling her the whole truth he knew that it was the best thing to do for now. Talking about Milah, and the prophecy and the linking spell wasn't going to change the fact that he was cursed by his ghosts from the past. And even knowing that he was indeed cursed, he refused to curse Emma too and if the only way to prevent that from happening was not telling her the truth, so be it.

Hours passed and, unlike Killian, Emma was sound asleep. Knowing that he was right there, with her, made her feel safe and as much as she wanted to spend the whole night making sure that he was really there, she was so exhausted that she fell asleep sooner than she expected.

Killian tried to fall asleep but he couldn't. He stood in silence seeing the way the moonlight touched Emma's face, contemplating the way she breathed.

Suddenly the peaceful silence was interrupted by a knock on the window. Killian slowly got out of the bed, making sure that he didn't disturb Emma's sleep.

He saw a crow on the other side of the window and opened it. The bird had a note wrapped around its paw.

As soon as Killian grabbed the note the crow fled leaving him alone with the small note on his hand. He read the note, wishing that he didn't:

_Glad to see you're still a pirate._

_Love, M._

* * *

**That Milah, what a bitch (:**

**So, dear readers, do I deserve a review? Sound of your thoughts in the box bellow and don't forget to watch OUAT!**

**Thank you so much for reading this chapter. Love you guys!**


	10. distance

**You guys have been absolutely awesome. Happy reading!**

* * *

_Telling never did me any good. Telling is worse for me than not telling_ — Ernest Hemingway

* * *

Killian couldn't take his eyes from the note. His hand was trembling and the reason was not the cold wind that was coming from the open window. He closed the window and looked around the room, making sure that there was no one in the room but Emma and him.

He left the room and went to Henry's room. The boy was peaceful asleep. Killian searched for something suspect in the room but nothing was wrong.

He made his way down the stairs and started to run through the whole house, opening and closing every door that he found, making sure that the windows were locked. After a few minutes he stopped the search, realizing that there was no one else in the house but the three of them.

He went to the kitchen and searched for the bottle of rum that he had storage in one of the cupboards. He sat on one of the chairs in silence, covering his face with his hand, trying to calm himself.

_How could he have been so stupid? He had done everything that she wanted him to do. _

_He had managed to return home and now, every step he took was a step closer for the prophecy to happen. How could he be with Emma like that? No matter how careful they were, how many precautions they took, none of that would matter … not when magic was involved._

Killian drank some of the rum of the bottle as he tried to find a magical solution capable of fixing all of this mess but as much as he tried he couldn't see a happy ending.

He looked again at the note. He grabbed a paper and a pen and started to write a small message. He took another drink from the bottle.

_He couldn't be selfish anymore, not when it comes to Emma – _he thought as he wrote the note – _This was their best option, at least for now, until he finds a way to fix all of this mess. Emma couldn't get pregnant; it was the only way to get Milah away from their lives and for that to happen he couldn't be near Emma. He couldn't be selfish anymore. They had to be apart._

* * *

**The next morning**

Emma slowly opened her eyes as the morning sun streamed in through the window. After almost a week without being able to have a good night of sleep, she had finally managed to sleep without having any nightmare during the whole night.

Emma rolled her body so she could look at Killian on the other side of the bed but all she found was empty sheets. She could feel her heart beating faster and a thousand questions were starting to invade her mind. She sat up and noticed a small paper on one of the nightstands. Emma grabbed the note and immediately noticed Killian's handwritten: _Went earlier to the sheriff station._

_Odd_ – she thought – _They always went to the station together and the last thing she thought that would happen was Killian to leave her alone after being gone for a week._

She got out of the bed and searched for her phone. She tried to call Killian but then she remembered that he had probably lost his phone during the boat trip, which remembered her that they really needed to talk about what happened during the time that he, David and Robin had been gone.

She went to Henry's bedroom. After waking up him she went to the kitchen and made breakfast. Minutes later, Regina showed up with Roland to pick it up Henry and took him to school. Emma cleaned the kitchen and went to the station.

Once she got there she realized that no one was there, not even her dad who usually was the first one to arrive. She sat at her desk, thinking that maybe Killian was at Granny's and would appear at any moment.

The sound of the door opening caught Emma's attention.

"Sorry I'm late" – David said as he entered in the room – "I lost track of the time. Snow and I…"

"It's okay David" – Emma interrupted him – "I really don't need the details"

"Right" – David said, clearing his throat – "I brought you some coffee" – he said, giving Emma a small cup.

"Hmm, no thanks" – she said, biting her lower lip.

"You don't want coffee?" – David asked surprised by her daughter's answer – "But you always want coffee"

"Yeah, I know" – Emma said, faking a laugh – "I already drank at home" – she lied.

"Okay, then" – David said, before drinking some of his coffee – "Where's Killian?" – he asked, noticing that he was not in the room.

"Actually, I was hoping you had seen him" – Emma said – "He left a note saying that he was here but when I arrived he wasn't, so I thought he was at Granny's but since you didn't see him there …"

"Maybe he's at the docks" – David said, sitting at his desk – "You know he likes to spend his shift there"

"I know … I just have this feeling that there is something going on" – Emma tried to explain –"What exactly happened on the boat trip?"

"You and Killian didn't talk about it?" – David asked, not wanting to have this conversation with her daughter, especially after Killian's request.

"We agreed to talk today …" – she said – "But he left the house while I was still asleep so …" – Emma explained – "I know that maybe I'm being paranoid but … Did something happen? He never acted like this"

"Why don't you wait for him to tell you?" – David said, looking at the paper on his desk – "I'm sure everything is okay, honey, don't worry about it"

"I can't even call him, dad" – Emma said, running her fingers through her hair – "Can you please tell me what happened during all the time you were away? I already know that the boat was destroyed but clearly something happened next"

David took his eyes from the files he was analyzing and looked at her daughter, trying to find the right words to say about what happened during the boat trip.

"At first everything was okay but then a storm came up from nowhere and destroyed the boat" – he started to say, noticing the worried expression on Emma's face – "We managed to swim till an island and wait for help but then no one showed up" – as soon as his words left his mouth, Emma's eyes became wet – "Emma, this wasn't your fault. You didn't know where we were … don't blame yourself" – he said, getting up from his chair so he could grab Emma's hand – "The important thing is that we are safe now"

"How did you manage to come back?" – she asked with a trembling voice – "You guys didn't have any boat …"

David remembered Killian's words and hoped that Robin had told Regina the same story he was now telling Emma.

"Some fishermen that were sailing near the island saw us and brought us back" – he said without looking at her.

"I'm glad they find you" – she softly said, caressing her father's hand – "Do you mind to take care of things here?"

"Go find him, honey" – he said after kissing her cheek.

* * *

Killian was pretty sure that hours had passed since he arrived at Gold's pawnshop. He was leaning against the back door of the shop waiting to see some movement inside. He was hoping that Belle was at the library so he could talk alone with the Dark One.

After all that happened, Belle and Killian had become good friends. Gold and he even managed to tolerate each other for the sake of everyone; still they were far away from being friends.

He detected some movement and knocked on the door with his hook. A few moments later, Gold appeared at the door.

"We're still closed" – he simply said – "And last time I checked the entrance is not here" –Rumpelstiltskin added.

"We need to talk" – Killian said with a serious voice – "Is Belle here?" – he asked.

"She's at the library" – Rumpelstiltskin stated.

"Good" – Killian said passing by Rumpelstiltskin and entering in the shop.

"I know that you've been gone for almost a week, Captain" – Rumpelstiltskin said, closing the door behind him – "But I don't appreciate you invading my store"

"Look, I wouldn't be here if it wasn't important" – Killian said – "And what I'm about to say can't leave this room"

"Very well" – Rumpelstiltskin said, waiting for Killian to continue, remembering the request that Emma had made about the secret pregnancy, a few days ago.

"The men who came back with us" – Killian started to say – "Their hearts were ripped out from their chests. I promised them that I would help them find a way to put their hearts in their chests again" – he said, remembering the time Rumpelstiltskin had ripped his heart too. He tried to erase that memory from his mind so the hatred and the disgust wouldn't return and turn the conversation into a fight.

"And you're telling me this because …" – Rumpelstiltskin said, like he was bored.

"Because I need your help to fix this" – Killian reluctantly said, swallowing his pride.

"And why would I do that, Captain?" – Rumpelstiltskin asked, faking a smile –"Surely you don't think I will help you from the goodness of my heart …" – he said like he was saying some joke –"In fact, why did you come to me? Why didn't you ask your girlfriend or Regina to do this boring job?"

Killian remained in silence. He should have known that it wouldn't be that simple. Of course Rumpelstiltskin wouldn't just help him _from the goodness of his heart_. He would want to know every little detail; every piece of information. He was too perceptive and Killian knew that keeping information from the Dark One would not help him at all.

"You don't want them to know…" – Rumpelstiltskin suddenly said, interrupting Killian's silence – "Or more specifically, you don't want Miss Swan to know" – he added, noticing the way Killian clenched his jaw.

"That's my concern, not yours" – Killian just said – "Do we have a deal, or not?"

"It depends, dearie … What do I get in return?" – Rumpelstiltskin asked with a creepy smile on his face.

"Information" – Killian said.

"Information" – Rumpelstiltskin repeated – "Information about what?"

_This is it_ – Killian thought.

He would have to tell Rumpelstiltskin about Milah. To be fair he wanted to tell him about her. He needed any help he could get and who would be a better help than the Dark One?

He also knew the risks he was taking by telling Gold about Milah. There was no trust between the pirate and the Dark One, and probably never will … so how could they work together without trust? This alliance could mean the death of him but he had to try. There was also Belle. She was her friend and hearing Milah's words about revenge reminded him that Belle would be in danger once Milah started her plan. He could hate Gold with all his soul but he knew that he was the only one who could keep Belle safe. Rumpelstiltskin had to know that Milah was alive.

"There's someone that is seeking revenge on you" – Killian started to say.

"Well, I'm not the friendliest person in town "– Rumpelstiltskin interrupted him – "I had my fair shot of enemies but I really doubt that any of them would want to challenge me again" – he continued to say – "Besides, my dagger is in a safe place and I don't think that anyone would risk losing a hand for trying to steal it from me" – he added, looking at Killian's hook and smiling.

Killian clenched his own hand, trying to ignore Rumpelstiltskin's innuendo and spoke again:

"She doesn't want just to kill you. She wants to destroy you; to crush your heart and it doesn't matter if the place where you keep you dagger is the bottom of the ocean or the stomach of a dragon because what really matters is where you keep your heart" – Killian harshly said, not able to contain his emotions.

The image of Belle invaded Rumpelstiltskin's mind after hearing Killian's disturbed speech.

"She?" – he asked, trying to focus again – "Who is this _she_?"

"You will not believe me" – Killian said, feeling exhausted.

"Try me" – Gold said, sounding like the Dark One that Killian remembered.

Killian looked at him, preparing himself for the storm that was about to come, even if Rumpelstiltskin didn't believe him.

"Milah" – he said, closing his eyes, trying to figure it out if he felt relieved or if the weight of the world on his shoulders had increased. He wasn't sure what he was feeling in that moment.

"You're right" – Rumpelstiltskin said, shaking his head –"I don't believe you"

"I know that this seems crazy…" – Killian tried to explain – "But she has magic and it's just a matter of time until she comes to town" – he continued to say – "I saw the hate in her eyes, the desire to destroy you. She will try to hurt Belle. You can't let that happen"

"She's dead!" – Rumpelstiltskin blurted – "I killed her or did you suddenly forget that?" – he asked with fury.

"I didn't forget anything, crocodile!" – Killian shouted back.

Things were starting to become ugly between Rumpelstiltskin and him. He couldn't lose control, not now. He needed to calm down. He took a deep breath before speaking again.

"You're right … You did kill her on that day" – he said – "The Milah I remember is no longer alive" – Killian added. He grabbed the note he had in his jacket pocket and gave it to Rumpelstiltskin – "You turned her into you"

Rumpelstiltskin noticed the strange expression on Killian's face but ignored it. His eyes were now on the paper, trying to figure it out what kind of information could a small piece of paper have.

He almost lost his balance when he saw the familiar handwriting. He didn't have to see the _M_ in the paper to know who wrote the note. Seconds passed until Rumpelstiltskin spoke again.

"This is not possible" – he murmured.

"I saw her with my own eyes" – Killian said, remembering the moment he had seen her again – "She was the responsible for the storm that destroyed our boat and … she has the Jolly Roger"

"Did you not hear me?" – Rumpelstiltskin interrupted him with venom in his mouth – "This can't be happening. This is not possible" – he repeated.

"She faked her own death …" – Killian said, ignoring Rumpelstiltskin's words – "She used some spell and she faked her own death and …"

Killian continued to talk but time and space seemed to have stopped for Rumpelstiltskin. It was all surreal for him to believe it.

He listened Killian's explanation without interrupting him. He noticed that the pirate's eyes were red and his face looked tired. _Shouldn't he be happy for Milah's return?_

"… and now she's back and she wants to make you pay for what you've done" – Killian finished saying, not telling Rumpelstiltskin about the prophecy – "Did you hear anything that I just said?" – he asked, noticing that Rumpelstiltskin didn't react to the news.

"Who else knows about this?" – he asked after a few seconds of silence.

"Just David and Robin … Why?" – Killian replied.

"Why did you tell me?" – Rumpelstiltskin asked, not answering Killian's question. The pirate looked at him with a confused expression on his face – "Why did you tell me? You could have lied to me about it … you could have made up some excuse in order to get my help and I would never know about …" – he didn't finish the sentence. It was like Milah's name was some kind of poison that he was afraid to taste.

"Because she threatened people that I care about and you're one of the few people in this town with enough power to stop her from hurting them" – Killian said – "Belle is my friend and her life is now in danger because of the choices that we've made in the past –"

"You didn't tell me this just because of Belle" – Rumpelstiltskin interrupted him – "You're keeping information to yourself" – Killian tried to speak but Rumpelstiltskin spoke again – "Why did she appear after almost three hundred years? Why _now_?"

The talk about the prophecy invaded Killian's mind and he tried to erase it from his mind. He couldn't share that information with anyone, not until he finds a way to stop Milah.

"It must be a reason …" – Rumpelstiltskin insisted, moving towards Killian.

"I don't know" – Killian lied, trying to sound convincing.

"Of course you do" – Rumpelstiltskin said.

Killian remained in silence, trying to figure it out what to say next. He could say that she had just now found a way to find him but then how would he explain the fact that she had bought the Jolly? He cursed himself for sharing too much information with Gold.

"You know, our problem could end right here and right now" – Rumpelstiltskin's voice interrupted his thoughts – "From what you told me your life is linked to hers so if you die … she dies too. She would no longer be a problem to me" – he said with a cold voice – "If I were you I would start talking before I change my mind, dearie"

"Then it wouldn't be Milah the responsible for breaking Belle's heart, it would be you" – Killian said – "She believes that you've changed; that you're a better man. She stood by your side all this time even when people told her that you were nothing but a killer"

"Let me guess, you were one of those people" – Rumpelstiltskin said.

"Actually no" – Killian said, remembering one of the many mornings he spent with Belle in the library, trying to find a way to release the fairies from the hat – "I told her that as big a bastard as you were, you did love her … so why don't we stop with the threats and start cooperate with each other" – he added, swallowing his pride – "You're the bloody Dark One, I'm sure it must be something that you can do about the linking spell … it must be a way to unlink me from her, right?"

"There isn't" – Rumpelstiltskin said, still trying to process what Killian had said to Belle – "There isn't any unlinking spell"

"So there is no hope …" – Killian said so low that he wasn't sure Rumpelstiltskin had heard him.

"Why do you want to break the spell?" – Rumpelstiltskin asked after a few seconds of silence –"Your life has been linked to hers during all this time and nothing changed. This spell doesn't control your life, unless she dies, of course" – Killian took his eyes from the ground and looked at him – "That's it, isn't it? You want to kill her"

Killian didn't answer right away. Did he really want to kill her? Was he capable of killing the woman he loved for more than two centuries? Would that be the end of their story?

"There's a difference between wanting and needing to" – Killian finally said.

"And why would you need to kill her? She's threatening me, not you" – Rumpelstiltskin said – "Besides, shouldn't you be happy with her return?"

_To protect the people I love; to protect my family; to protect Emma … to protect my child, if I ever have one _– Killian heard the answer in his mind as soon as Rumpelstiltskin asked the question.

Before he could say anything else, the front door of the pawnshop opened:

"Killian! Hi!" – Belle said, entering in the store – "Is everything alright?" – she asked, after giving him a hug, looking at him and her husband with concern.

"Everything is fine" – Killian said, smiling at her friend, once again she had saved him from the Dark One – "I was just looking for you. I need your help to find some books"

Rumpelstiltskin looked at him with a confused expression but Killian ignored him.

"Sure, it will be my pleasure …" – she said – "But can we do the research tomorrow? I have some work to do here at the store and –"

"Of course, I'll meet you tomorrow at the library" – Killian immediately said.

"Eight o'clock?" – Belle asked.

"Eight o'clock" – Killian repeated before he left the store.

* * *

David was at the sheriff station checking some files when the phone of the station rang. Emma still hadn't returned and the first thing that he thought when he heard the phone ringing was that was probably his daughter the one who was calling to tell him that she had found Killian.

His absence was very unusual. Killian was always where Emma was as Emma was always where Killian was.

He didn't tell anything to Emma but he was starting to fear the worst.

_What if Milah had something to do with his disappearance? What if she had tried to kidnap him again?._

He remembered Emma saying something about a note that Killian had left and tried to erase that kind of thoughts from his mind.

Nevertheless, the fact that he hadn't showed up to work could only be related to what happened during the boat trip. Emma had also mentioned that she and Killian hadn't talked about the boat incident and David caught himself thinking that maybe Killian's behavior had something to do to the fact that he didn't want to share with Emma what had happened during the last week. He was avoiding her in an attempt to not lie to her. Regardless, David knew his daughter and she would eventually sense that something had happened or more specifically, was already happening.

Seeing the hurt in Emma's face made his heart ache. He knew his daughter's trust issues and couldn't help but worry. He saw in her eyes that Killian's behavior was hurting her and seeing Emma like that made him feel guilty for having lied to her, even if it was Killian's request.

He picked up the phone, ready to hear Emma's voice but it was not her voice that he heard on the other side of the line.

"David?" – a familiar voice said.

"Yeah, Robin, it's me" – David answered – "When did you have the time to buy a new phone?"

"I didn't … I'm at the animal shelter" – Robin said – "I need you to come here"

"Why, is something wrong?" – he immediately asked with concern – "Did something happen?"

"No, nothing happened …" – Robin quickly said – "We just need to talk" – he added, clearing his throat.

"Isn't that what we're doing right now?" – David said.

"I need you to come here, David" – he nervously said – "It's important" – he insisted.

"Emma is not at the station" – David started to explain – "She's still searching for Killian … I can't just close the station"

"Ask her to replace you for a bit" – Robin suggested.

"Robin, what's going on?" – David asked suspiciously.

"Just do it!" – he exclaimed before hanging up the phone.

_Did he just hang up on me? _– Davidsaid to himself in disbelief.

After a few moments, David decided to call Emma and tell her to return to the sheriff station. At first she protested – she hadn't found Killian yet. But then, after he told her that he would eventually end up showing up at the station she agreed.

Once she arrived he noticed that she had the same worried expression from that morning. He decided it was best to not make any comment so he just kissed her cheek before leaving the sheriff station.

A few minutes later he arrived at the animal shelter.

"For starters I was not the one who hung up on you" – Robin said as soon as David entered in the animal store.

One of the doors of the room opened and David saw a familiar face approaching him.

"What the hell, Killian!?" – he blurted – "Emma searched all day for you and you decided to spend your time talking with dogs?"

"She didn't come with you, did she?" – Killian asked, looking at the front door.

"No, she's at the sheriff station" – as soon as David said those words, Killian relaxed a bit – "What's going on?"

"I went to see Gold" – Killian said. Robin approached them – "I told him what happened. He knows about Milah"

"How did he react?" – David asked with concern.

"At first he was in shock, then he thought I was lying and finally he realized that the news were true" – Killian explained – "It wasn't a pleasant conversation"

"Please tell me you didn't tell him about the linking spell" – David said, closing his eyes.

"I had to" – Killian stated.

"Are you out of your mind?" – David exclaimed – "How do we know that he won't try to kill you and just end with any threat?"

"I had to know if he could perform some bloody spell capable of unlinking me from her" – Killian explained, running his hand through his hair.

"From your reaction, I'm guessing he didn't give you a positive answer"

"No …" – Killian softly said – "There isn't any spell capable of doing that"

"Maybe he lied to you" – Robin said.

"He didn't" – Killian said – "I know he didn't … I saw it in his face"

Silence invaded the room as the three men tried to figure it out what to do next.

"I think it's about time for Emma to know the truth" – David finally said, breaking the silence.

Killian opened his mouth to protest but Robin interrupted him:

"She's the Savior, Killian" – he said – "Maybe she can find a way to –"

"She can't!" – Killian interrupted him, starting to walk around the room as the memory of the prophecy invaded his mind – "No one can fix this"

"Hey" – David said, trying to get Killian's attention – "We're going to find a way; we always do"

"Not this time, Dave" – he said so low that David and Robin didn't hear him.

"Why don't you start by going with me to the sheriff station" – David continued to say – "She spent the all day searching for you. She deserves an explanation … if you could see her face … she looks so sad…"

"Do you think I don't know that?" – Killian exclaimed – "Do you think it doesn't pains me to know that I'm the one who is hurting her when all I'm trying to do is protect her?"

"You're the one who needs protection, Killian" – David said – "From what you've told us it's you who your dead wife wants" – he tried to explain – "Do you think she's planning to hurt Emma?"

"I will not let anything happen to her" – Killian immediately said.

"You know … the best way for you to assure that is being by her side, not avoiding her" – David replied – "Don't act like you're running from some curse"

_But don't you know David … I'm not running from any curse; I'm the curse – _Killian said to himself.

Suddenly, a sound coming from David's walkie-talkie caught the men's attention.

"David, can you hear me?"

_Bloody hell_ – Killian thought the second he heard Emma's voice.

He had let his walkie-talkie at the station to prevent him from hearing her voice and asked Robin to use the phone of the animal shelter so Emma wouldn't hear his conversation with David.

David raised his eyebrow at Killian before answering:

"Yeah, Emma" – David said – "Is something wrong?"

"Mary Margaret called me" – Emma started to say –"Since it's almost dinner time she wanted to know when you intend to go home and start making the special dinner you promised this morning – her words, not mine" – she explained.

"I lost track of the time. Tell her that I'll be there in a few minutes" – David said, remembering his conversation with his wife on that morning.

"Okay" – Emma said – "Um… dad … do you have any news from Killian?" – she added with a trembling voice – "It's almost sunset and …"

"He's fine, honey" – David softly said – "He's with Robin at the animal shelter" – he said, looking at Killian who avoided his gaze.

"What? Why didn't you tell me sooner?" – Emma exclaimed, not being able to disguise the relief in her voice.

"I was going to but you reached me first" – David quickly said.

"He's fine, right? I mean …" – she nervously asked.

"He's fine, honey" – David said trying to calm her down – "Why don't you close the sheriff station and go home? I'm sure he's already on his way back home too"

"Yeah, you're right, I'll do that" – Emma said – "Thanks, dad"

David finished his conversation with Emma and looked at Killian with a serious look.

"Spare me the lecture, David" – Killian said, noticing the way David was looking at him.

"I was just going to offer you a ride" – David simply said.

"So you can lecture me during the ride? I think I'll pass" – he said.

"This is serious, Killian. You need to go home and fix this, _now_" – David said, raising his voice.

Killian looked at Robin searching for some kind of support but he just gave him a look that meant anything but support. Reluctantly, he followed David to the car.

* * *

Emma was at the kitchen making dinner when she heard the sound of the front door opening. She immediately stopped what she was doing and ran to the hallway.

When Killian finished closing the door and turned his body, Emma was standing right in front of him in silence with her arms crossed over her chest. He opened his mouth to speak but the words got stuck in his throat. Emma closed her eyes and turned her back on him, making her way to the kitchen without a word.

Killian took a deep breath, cursing himself for being the reason of Emma's suffering.

"Love, wait" – he suddenly said, running after her.

"Why? You didn't wait for me this morning, did you?" – she said as she cleaned some of the dishes that were scattered all over the kitchen counter – "Couldn't you just have said where you were or if you were alright? Is that so much to ask?" – Emma blurted – "Damn it Killian! You've been gone for almost a week… I cried like an idiot thinking that you were dead and the first thing you do after you return is run away from me like I have some kind of contagious disease …"

"Emma, it's not –" – Killian tried to explain.

"I told you that we needed to talk and you said that we were going to talk, _today_" – Emma continued to say, ignoring Killian's attempt to talk – "But you avoided me all day so don't say that you're not running away from me, cause I know you are… I'm the expert when it comes to run away, remember?" – she exclaimed, breaking the plate she was holding when she tried to put it on the kitchen counter using too much force.

She immediately felt the cut and saw the blood flowing from her hand.

"Love, are you alright?" – Killian said with concern, trying to make her turn her body so he could see if she was hurt.

"It's nothing, I'm fine" – Emma said, washing her hand, trying to erase any sign of blood.

"Let me see it" – he insisted, touching her arm gently.

"I said I'm fine, Killian" – Emma tried to say but Killian had already grabbed her arm, making her turn her body to him.

She looked at him and couldn't help but think how similar this situation was to the one of some years ago – when she had cut her hand during the beanstalk and Killian had cleaned her wound with rum and a small piece of cloth.

She watched him as he analyzed her hand with concern in his eyes. She looked at her hand and noticed that the blood had disappeared and the cut was much smaller and not so deep than before. _Odd_ – she thought.

"It seems it's just a scratch" – Killian's voice made her look at him again.

She could feel his hand caressing hers and for a moment she felt like everything was back to normal again.

"Please talk to me …" – she murmured, pleading with her eyes – "I already talked with my dad about what happened and I know it can't be easy to talk about it but … I just want to know how are you feeling; how are you dealing with all that happened …"

"I'm fin-" – Killian tried to say.

"Don't say that you're fine because you're not" – she said, releasing her hand from his embrace – "I know that you're not"

Killian remained in silence for a few seconds.

"It was my fault" – he said so low that if Emma wasn't just a few inches from him she wouldn't have heard him.

"It was an accident, it wasn't your fault" – Emma tried to reassure him.

"Yes, it is!" – Killian exclaimed, moving away from Emma.

"Killian –" – Emma said, trying to reach him.

"Is everything alright?" – Henry interrupted her, walking into the kitchen – "I heard something breaking and noise"

"Everything is fine, kid" – Emma said, running her hands through her hair – "I just broke a plate. Dinner is almost ready" – she added.

"Good, I'm starving" – Henry said before leaving the room.

Emma wanted to continue her talk with Killian but he had followed Henry to the living room, leaving her alone in the kitchen. Something was definitely not right. She had never seen him acting like that before.

Henry spent all dinner talking with Killian and Emma could see how much he had missed him. Despite his previous behavior Killian was now back to normal. He even laughed at something that Henry said. She was glad Killian tried to act the same way he always did around Henry. She didn't want Henry to know that Killian and she had been arguing.

After dinner they watched some TV and then Killian put Henry to sleep.

Emma went to her bedroom and decided to wait for Killian there so they could finally talk without being interrupted. She wanted him to tell her why he was acting so strange; why he had that worried look on his face.

It seemed like he was hiding something but then she realized that she was the one who was hiding something from him. Unconsciously she touched her stomach still flat. She hadn't told him yet and as much as she wanted to do it she didn't think that now was the right time to tell him; not when he was acting like he was not her Killian anymore.

She looked around the room and saw one of the books Killian was reading. Belle's influence. She grabbed the book: _Romeo and Juliet. _Emma rolled her eyes and smiled. _Was he really reading Shakespeare?_

She noticed that one of the last pages had a mark on it. He was almost finishing the book. Belle would be so proud – she thought.

It was still hard to believe that Killian had become friend of the wife of his eternal enemy, even if they tried to act like civilized people around each other.

Emma still didn't trust Rumpelstiltskin, not after all he had done to her family (the memory of Killian's heart on his hands made her shiver) but she couldn't deny that he was trying to make an effort to gain the people's trust again and he had indeed helped her finding Killian and the others.

She climbed to bed and started reading the book. She had read the first twelve pages when she looked at the door, searching for any sign of Killian but she saw none. She continued to read but after a few minutes she started to yawn. She tried to keep her eyes opened but the need to sleep was stronger than her desire to stay awake and when Killian entered in the room Emma was already asleep.

After telling one of his stories to Henry, the boy had fallen asleep and Killian stood in silence watching him sleep, trying to find the right words to say to Emma. He had almost said too much in the kitchen, confusing Emma even more. He couldn't make that mistake again.

He climbed to bed, trying not to wake Emma. He noticed that she was grabbing the book he had been reading these past days over her belly. He didn't know the ending of the story yet but he hoped it would be a happy ending.

He grabbed the book slowly and her hands were now resting on her belly. Killian lay down next to her and looked at her face. She seemed peaceful, like the world was a safe place to live and to dream … He didn't know how long he had been staring at her before he kissed her forehead gently.

"I'm sorry" – he murmured, before he turn off the light.

* * *

**Thank you so much for reading this chapter. Don't forget to tell me what you think! I love reading the reviews and I hope you all are still enjoying this story. Love you guys! (:**


	11. shakespearean tragedy

_Under love's heavy burden do I sink_ — William Shakespeare

* * *

Just like the morning before, Emma woke up alone.

_So this is becoming a thing, then –_ she thought, closing her eyes again.

After a few seconds, she sat up to look around the room, searching for some note from Killian, since now that was the only way they communicated with each other, but she saw none.

She got up from the bed and made her way to the bathroom. She definitely needed a shower so she could wake up from the nightmare that her life was becoming. After the quick shower she made her way down the stairs. She heard some voices coming from the kitchen.

As soon as she entered in the kitchen the smell of food almost made her barf. Killian and Henry were making pancakes, talking with each other enthusiastically. Emma suddenly realized that the kitchen was a mess but at least Killian was back to normal, she thought, trying to ignore the smell that was coming from the food.

Killian heard her entering in the room and turned his body to her. He had a towel over his shoulder and could almost be considered the perfect picture of domesticity.

"Good morning, love" – he said, smiling at her.

"Hi, mom!" – Henry exclaimed right after Killian – "We're making pancakes! Doesn't it smell good?" – he added smiling.

Emma just nodded, faking a smile, well aware that if she opened her mouth the only thing that would come from it would not be words but the dinner from last night.

She sat on one of the chairs and had to hold her breath when Henry put a plate of pancakes right in front of her.

"Coffee is almost ready" – Killian said, grabbing a cup from the cupboard.

_Oh God_ – Emma thought, cursing herself for being an addicted to coffee.

Henry was already eating his pancakes. He looked at her and then at her plate, noticing that the pancakes were still intact. She immediately grabbed her fork, pretending to eat the food on her plate.

Killian put the cup of coffee beside her plate and placed a small kiss on her forehead.

"I promised Belle I would meet her at the library" – Killian said – "I know that you're still mad at me about yesterday but I promise that I'm going to fix all of this" – he murmured, so Henry wouldn't hear him – "See you tonight, love" – he said before heading to the door.

"Killian, wait!" – Henry quickly said, swallowing his last piece of pancake – "I'm coming too; I'm already late for school! Bye mom!" – he said, grabbing his school bag – "And don't forget to eat your pancakes!" – he added before following Killian.

As soon as she heard the door closing, she ran to the sink, throwing her head over to vomit all the food she had in her stomach.

"Seriously?" – she said to no one in particular – "Since when do I hate pancakes?"

She looked around the room and decided that it was best to start cleaning the kitchen. She grabbed the cup of coffee that Killian had prepared for her, remembering how good the taste of coffee was.

_It was such a crime not to drink it_ – she thought as she ran the cup under the water from the faucet.

* * *

When Killian opened the library door he immediately caught Belle organizing some books in one of the many shelves of the room. She was using a stepladder so she could reach the books that were in the higher shelves.

"Sorry, I'm late" – he said, entering in the room.

"It's okay" – Belle said, turning her body to him – "I had to clean some books, anyway" – she added smiling.

"Of course you had" – Killian murmured. Belle's concern about the books never ceased to amuse him. He found it adorable the way Belle cared and talked about them, like they were real people.

"So, did you ask her?" – Belle asked him.

"What?" – Killian asked confused, reaching for her hand so he could help her descend the stepladder.

"Did you ask Emma?" – Belle asked again, grabbing his hand – "Did you propose to her? What did she say?"

After all that had happened, Killian had totally forgot about the main reason he was on the boat that leaded him to all the problems that were now trying to steal his happiness from him.

For months the idea of marry Emma never left his mind and now it seemed that the closer he was to make his dream come true, the farther he was from reality.

How could he think about marry her if he didn't even know how to be with her anymore?

Unconsciously he touched the pocket of his jacket, searching for the small box that he used to carry with him since he found the perfect ring. Even if he hadn't asked for David's blessing right after he bought the ring, Killian wanted to be prepared just in case the perfect opportunity to ask Emma appeared.

Of course he wanted to ask David first but sometimes the stars in the sky align and the perfect opportunity appears right in front of your eyes and when that happens you can't just ignore it, you have to take that opportunity and make it more perfect than perfection.

Killian had searched for that moment and was now happy that the moment never came, not just because he wanted to have the talk with David first, but also because it would make things more difficult than they already were if he had indeed asked her to marry him.

_Perfection_ – he thought – _Nothing would be perfect again_.

"No" – Killian softly said.

"She said _no_?" – Belle exclaimed in shock.

"No …" – Killian repeated, noticing the distressed expression on Belle's face – "I didn't ask her yet"

"Of course …" – Belle said – "Now it's not the best time … after all that happened" – she added, referring to the boat's accident – "How are you by the way? We didn't exactly have time to talk about it" – she gently asked.

"I'm fine" – he quickly said but Belle didn't seem convinced – "I just … I just wished that things had turn out different, you know?" – he explained.

"Yeah …" – she said – "But you're here now and I'm sure that whatever happens next will be better" – Belle said smiling at her friend – "Besides, you still have the ring …"

_The ring_ – Killian thought, feeling his heart ache.

He had lost the ring; at least he thought he had. After all that happened the ring was now in the bottom of the ocean, or in the sand of that bloody island or in the Jolly Roger. Wherever it was, it was lost. He had spent hours searching for the perfect ring and now it was gone. His past had stolen his future.

"But first, what do you say we start searching for whatever it is that you're searching for?" – Belle's voice interrupted his thoughts.

"Right" – Killian said, clearing his throat – "Do you have any books about prophecies?" – he asked, trying to focus on what had brought him to the library.

"I think so …" – she said – "There are some old books about prophecies and legends and stuff like that … But why do you want those kind of books?" – she asked with curiosity.

"I'm trying to figure it out some things" – he said, not wanting to give to many details to his friend – "It's nothing important … it's more like a personal research"

"Okay" – Belle simply said – "Follow me"

Killian followed her to the other side of the library. Belle started to search for the books, not taking her eyes from the shelves as she read the title of the books. Before he noticed he was holding five books in his hand, with the help of his hook, while Belle was holding three.

"Do you want my help with the research?" – she asked, dropping the books on one of the tables.

"Oh, no, don't worry" – Killian immediately said –"I'm sure you have more interesting things to do" – he said sitting on one of the chairs.

"Actually no" – Belle said sitting on the chair next to him, opening one of the books – "So, what are we searching for?"

Killian's plan didn't include Belle finding out about the prophecy but he knew that she wouldn't give up on helping him and he could really use an extra hand, besides, no one was better that Belle when it comes to books, so after a few seconds of deliberation he decided that he could reveal some information to Belle without her knowing about the prophecy.

"Can you mark the pages that have any kind of information about prophecies involving the sea or something related to _blood made of sea_?" – he asked, opening one of the books as well.

"Prophecies about the sea" – Belle said to herself, starting to read the first page of her book. Killian did the same and the sound of turning pages invaded the library.

* * *

Emma was at Granny's trying to eat her lunch. She was seated on the same place for almost thirty minutes with her plate still full and didn't even notice the way Granny was looking at her. She was so lost in her own thoughts that she didn't realize that Granny was now pointing at her as she talked to Ruby.

On that morning, after she cleaned the kitchen, Killian's words started to echo in her mind. She didn't quite realize the meaning of the words after he had said them: _I'm going to fix all of this, _but now she couldn't stop listening to his words over and over again.

_What was he talking about? Was there anything to be fixed? Weren't they fine? Yes, they were not on their best terms but that didn't mean that they needed to be fixed. They were not broken, were they?_

"The wolves over there don't stop howling" – a voice interrupted her thoughts – "And they're looking at you"

"Regina, what are you doing here?" – Emma said, looking at her friend that was seated right in front of her and had stolen one of her fries.

"Apparently I'm eating the food that you should have eaten a long time ago" – Regina said – "This junk food is cold" – she added and Emma rolled her eyes – "Are you still with nausea?"

Surprisingly, Emma was hungry. The morning sickness had stopped and since she hadn't eaten her breakfast she was desperate for some food, but then she remembered Killian's words and totally forgot to eat her food.

"No, I just got a little distracted" – Emma stated.

"When do you plan to go to the doctor?" – Regina suddenly asked. Emma had finally tasted her food and was ready to protest but Regina spoke again – "You should call Whale to schedule an appointment"

"Can you speak a little louder?" – Emma murmured sarcastically so the other clients at the restaurant didn't hear her.

"You need to go see Whale" – Regina insisted, looking around the room making sure that no one was listening their conversation.

"I know" – Emma softly said – "I just … I just want to tell Killian first" – she murmured.

"You didn't tell him yet?" – Regina exclaimed and Emma mouthed _shhhh_ to her – "You have to tell him" – she murmured.

"He's acting strange … I don't know why but since he returned he has been distant" – Emma tried to explain – "Now is not the right moment to tell him"

"Stop complicate things. There is no right moment to tell your boyfriend that he's going to be a dad" – Regina explained – "You just do it, especially when you have to start making plans and go to the appointments" – she said, emphasizing the word appointments.

"Speaking of plans" – Emma said, trying to change the subject – "Aren't you supposed to be planning a wedding?"

"I'm going to postpone it" – Regina said, after a few seconds of silence – "There are still a lot of things to do. Robin and I were supposed to choose the flowers and the food and the music last week, but then the accident happened and the whole schedule changed"

"I'm sure it will be a beautiful wedding, Regina" – Emma said, trying to cheer up her friend.

"I know it will" – Regina said smiling – "Besides, now I'll have more time to organize everything with less stress" – she added – "And you better tell Killian about your condition before the wedding, Miss Swan"

* * *

Killian read all of the books that Belle gave him more than once and none of the prophecies that he found spoke about a magical child. He was starting to feel anxious with the lack of answers. He needed to know more about this prophecy so he could find a solution.

"You know, whatever it is that you're searching for, none of these books will give you a certain answer" – Belle said, noticing that Killian was running his hand through his hair nervously.

"What do you mean?" – Killian said, taking his eyes from the book he was reading.

"Prophecies can be misunderstood" – she started to explain – "The accuracy or outcome of any prophecy is altered by the desires and attachments of those who hear or read the prophecy"

"So you're saying that it's possible a prophecy not be real?" – he said, trying to disguise the hope in his voice.

"I'm saying that when you're dealing with a prophecy you can't take words in their usual or most basic sense" – Belle said – "You have to look at them like metaphors or allegories and sometimes the prophecy you're dealing with doesn't even tell you the whole story; sometimes the same prophecy has different versions with different information" – she added – "Like I said, sometimes prophecies can be misunderstood and misinterpreted"

Killian remained in silence remembering Milah's words about the prophecy:

_Like the sea is eternal, the child's heart will be immortal. _

_Because the child's mother is the savior and the father has the sea running into his veins, the child's heart will have the power of immortality; the power to save and cure; the power to concede an eternal life to anyone capable of ripping its heart out of its chest and perform the undying spell. _

_Contrary to most people, as soon as the heart leaves its body the child will immediately die, like a wave that dies on the sand every time it tries to abandon the sea_

Milah. She would come to town eventually and then the real problems would start. He needed to do something. She had magic and she was dangerous. She had used magic on him, so what would stop her from using magic on other people? She could harm them … Not to mention the child.

It was silly but every time he thought about someone hurting his child he immediately felt rage invading his whole body and a needing to protect that he didn't think it was possible; it was like something inside of him changed and he couldn't quite understand that feeling because, truth to be told, there wasn't any child to protect, it was all theoretical.

"Look, whatever it is that you're searching for …" – Belle interrupted his thoughts –"you shouldn't lose hope just yet. I know that you don't want me to know what you're searching for and that's okay" – she continued to say – "I just think that you should share this with someone, especially if it's something that is troubling you"

Killian looked at Belle trying to find the right words to say.

"I don't want you to think that I don't trust you. Because I do" – he started to say – "I just … It's complicated…" – he said, scratching his ear.

"Prophecies are a complicated thing" – Belle softly said – "But I understand … just think about what I said. Sometimes things get a little easier when you share them with other people"

_And sometimes they get more complicated_ – Killian said to himself.

* * *

Hours later, when Killian returned home, he immediately went to the garage and searched for his old jacket.

His research had been a waste of time and now he was more confused than ever. Knowing that could be more about this prophecy than what he knew scared him. The lack of information could be a good sign but also a bad one.

He opened the closet full of boxes and old stuff and immediately saw it. He decided to keep it there the day he had returned from the boat trip. He didn't want to look at the jacket and remember all that happened.

He grabbed the jacket and took it out of the closet, realizing that the jacket was not only dirty but also ripped. The reflection of himself, he thought.

He held the jacket and then he quickly searched for the small box that he had been carrying around with him for the past weeks. Killian knew that was almost impossible for the ring to be there, still he put his hand inside the right pocket and prepared himself to find nothing but then he felt something in his hand.

_It's not possible_ – he thought, touching the small box full of hope and possibility.

He grabbed it and took it out of the pocket so he could see it. Unconsciously, he smiled as soon as he saw the box in his hand. He opened it and saw the ring with a blue diamond inside.

"_What about this one?" – he heard Belle saying from the other side of the store. She raised her arm, showing the ring she was holding._

_Killian put the two rings he was analyzing on the store counter and walked towards her friend._

"_So what do you think?" – she asked again, placing the ring in his hand._

_He looked at the ring, trying to see the appeal that Belle saw in it. The diamond ring was red and Killian quickly realized that the rock was too big. He wanted a simpler ring and maybe with a different color._

"_I don't know …" – he said, scratching the back of his ear – "I don't think it's the right color …"_

"_Yeah, you're probably right" – Belle quickly said, searching for another ring – "What about this?" – she said, showing him a purple ring._

_Killian shook his head. That was definitely not the ring._

"_You do realize that we've been here for three hours" – she said looking at her friend – "Not to mention that we've been searching for the perfect ring for almost a week" – Belle added, emphasizing the word perfect._

"_I know, I know" – Killian said, pacing around the room – "I just –"_

_Killian didn't have the time to finish the sentence. His eyes got stuck in a small ring that seemed to be hiding from the world but not from him. He approached the showcase so he could touch the ring._

"_I think we found it" – he murmured._

"_Let me see it, let me see it" – Belle said, running towards him. Killian didn't even feel Belle's hand in his back trying to see the ring._

_The blue of the diamond of the ring was the reflection of Killian's deep blue eyes; the color of the sea. It was absolutely perfect. He could picture the way the ring would fit in Emma's hand._

_It was different from Snow's ring, specially the color. The diamond was smaller but the rock was brighter. He knew what the ring meant to the Charmings: True love follows this ring whenever it goes – he had heard Charming and Snow say to Neal, every time they told the baby their story. Killian wanted that. He wanted a ring capable of showing how much Emma meant to him._

"_It's beautiful. I think it was worth the wait" – Belle said, caressing Killian's arm._

"_Yes, it was" – Killian finally said and Belle couldn't help but smile, quickly realizing that Killian was not talking about the ring._

"Killian?" – a familiar voice almost made him jump, interrupting his thoughts. He quickly hid the box inside the pocket of the coat before he turned his body – "Is everything alright?"

"Swan…" – he said, looking at Emma.

"What are you doing here?" – she asked, approaching him.

"Hmm … nothing … nothing important" – Killian said at the same time he tried to close the closet with his back.

"Is that your pirate jacket?" – Emma said touching one of the doors of the closet, preventing him from closing it – "Why did you put it in here?"

"I just …" – Killian said after a few seconds of silence – "I'm trying to leave the pirate behind" – he said, faking a smile.

"What? Why?" – she immediately asked, reaching for his arm. He stood in silence, looking at the way Emma was holding his arm – "You don't have to leave the pirate behind. I don't want you to leave the pirate behind, you shouldn't either" – she continued to say – "Your past –"

"Emma, stop" – he interrupted her as soon as he heard the word _past_, releasing his arm from her embrace and closing the closet.

"I'm not going to stop, Killian" – Emma shot back – "Look, I know what's going on" – she added, softly this time, and suddenly Killian became pale – "You're having some kind of identity crisis because of what happened during the trip but what happened wasn't your fault … It was an accident. There's nothing to fix" – she explained – "Maybe what happened made you remember things that you've done in your past and you're worried that I'm going to see you different but I'm not. You can't blame your past for everything bad that happens and you don't have to hide it either" – she added gently.

_You can't blame your past for everything bad that happens –_ Emma's words echoed in his mind like destiny was joking with him. His past was the problem; the reason why everything bad happened and would continue to happen if he didn't do something to stop it.

"The past is a complicated thing, love … and mine is just …" – he tried to say, taking a deep breath – "I just wished mine was different" – he managed to say.

"I don't" – Emma said smiling – "I'm a fan of every part of you, _pirate_"

Killian wanted to put her in his arms the instant he heard her words.

She had used his own words to show him how much she loved him even the parts of him that he was ashamed of. Never in his life had he thought that he would find someone like her. He didn't deserve her. He didn't deserve the life that she had offered him.

Suddenly he realized something: he had nothing to offer to her but pain and disappointment; she had offered him the world and he was about to destroy everything. She had offered him a family, a purpose, something to live for, a new life … How could she forgive him for bringing his ghosts to her life? How could she forgive him for being the ingredient that would curse an innocent child? How could she forgive him for turning life into death?

He opened his mouth to speak but the sound of Emma's phone interrupted him.

Emma took her phone from her jean pocket and answered the call. She mouthed the word _Regina_ to him before leaving the garage and entering inside the house.

After dinner Killian went to his room. He sat on the bed thinking about all that happened during the day. He hadn't lied to Emma when he said that he wanted to leave the pirate behind. He really wanted to do that, now more than ever. If it wasn't for his pirate life none of this mess had started in the first place.

_But if wasn't for your pirate life you hadn't met Emma_ – a voice inside his head said.

He knew that Emma loved him. It had not been easy making her admit her feelings for him but a year ago, when she finally said those three words to him, he knew right there and right then that he could never love anyone but her, and today, hearing her say the same words that he had said to her a year ago made him remember of that moment.

Maybe Belle was right; maybe he should tell her the truth. They could find a solution, together.

He got up from the bed feeling the weight of the world on his shoulders disappearing. He was going to tell her and everything would be alright.

He started to pace around the room, trying to find the right way to tell Emma about the news, when his eyes caught the book he had been reading these past weeks. He grabbed the book and went to bed. Maybe reading was the solution; maybe the book could show him the right words to say to Emma, besides, reading always helped him to relax. He had almost finished the book; there was only a few pages left to read.

He started to read the book. Every time he turned one of the pages he prepared himself for the happy ending but as he continued to read the happy ending never came. There were only a few pages left and Killian started to realize that the story would not end the way he wanted to.

When Emma entered in the room, the lights were already off. Killian was on his side of the bed sound asleep. She climbed to bed, trying not to wake him. She lay down next to him, wrapping her arms around his body.

Emma kissed the back of his neck and closed her eyes unaware that, next to her, Killian was still awake, trying to erase from his mind the last words of the book that was hidden under his pillow, reminding him that not every story had a happy ending:

_A glooming peace this morning with it brings;_

_The sun, for sorrow, will not show his head:_

_Go hence, to have more talk of these sad things:_

_Some shall be pardon'd, and some punished:_

_For never was a story of more woe_

_Than this of Juliet and her Romeo._

* * *

**Thank you so much for reading this chapter.**

**I know that a lot of you want Killian to find out about Emma being pregnant and see his reaction but I promise you it will worth the wait. Just be a little patience, dear readers!**

**Don't forget to tell me what you think! See you next chapter (:**


	12. (un)happy ending

**I'm trying to put some of the events that happened in the show in this story as well, nevertheless, some things will be a little different as you might notice.**

**So I'd like to say that in this fanfic: ****Belle never dated Will; ****Zelena really died; ****Regina can have children.**

**If I remember any more important details I will mention.**

**Happy reading!**

* * *

… _and there was the sea between us again_ — Sylvia Plath

* * *

A week later and Killian's behavior still made Emma uneasy.

She had stopped making questions, hoping that maybe his identity crisis passed and he returned to his normal self but Killian was far from normal and any doubt that Emma had disappeared on one certain morning.

She was lying in bed with her eyes opened, staring at the ceiling for at least an hour. Killian was sound asleep next to her and she was waiting in silence for him to wake up.

These last days he had barely touched her; the only exception was the day he had returned and she had literally jumped into his arms, after that he almost didn't touch her, only small kisses and most of them on her forehead.

He was different; she could feel it and that scared her. The fact that she was slowly losing him scared her, especially because she was feeling now what she had felt when he went on the boat trip that almost killed him. She was feeling that something was about to happen and that she was going to lose him.

She felt the mattress shaking and saw Killian opening his eyes.

"Hi" – she softly said, leaning her head to his so she could reach his lips.

"You're already awake?" – Killian said, moving to a sitting position, preventing Emma from kissing him.

"Yeah" – Emma said, trying to ignore his action – "I was waiting for you … Henry isn't home" – she added.

"I know" – he said, without looking at Emma – "He spent the night at Regina's …"

"Which means that we are alone" – Emma completed his sentence as she moved closer to him.

"You know how David gets when we're late" – he tried to say with a convincing voice but the way Emma was moving her body to his was enough for his voice to betray him.

"I don't care" – she said sitting on his lap, wrapping her legs around his waist.

"Well, I do" – Killian said as Emma kissed his neck. Under different circumstances he would tease her calling her _pirate_ or saying something like _pillage and plunder so early?_

"I'm the Sheriff, remember?" – she teased him, starting to unbutton the shirt of his pajamas – "You're safe with me"

Killian could feel Emma's lips placing kisses along his throat and the side of his neck. The movements of her hips made him forget how to breathe. His head fell back. _Oh Gods how he wanted her. _He could feel her breath on his lips, suddenly realizing that she was going to kiss him and that would be his undoing; he wouldn't be able to stop so he did the only thing that he could do – he opened his eyes.

"I can't" – he murmured. Emma looked at him in silence for a few seconds and Killian saw in her eyes his own heart breaking. She got out of bed without a word. Before she could reach the bathroom door, Killian jumped out of bed too and reached her arm – "It's not what you're thinking" – he said, trying to make her see that his feelings for her didn't change.

"Actually it is" – Emma said, releasing her arm from his hand – "It's exactly what I'm thinking and … and I don't even know what the worst part is: the fact that you're running away from me or the fact that you don't tell me why …" – she said, walking towards the bathroom, trying to hide the trembling in her voice and the tears that were about to fall.

"Emma, wait …" – Killian said, following her.

"That's all I've been doing lately, waiting for you!" – she blurted, turning her body so she could face him – "Waiting for you to come back from that boat trip that almost killed you! Because you're still there Killian! You're still on the middle of the ocean, far away from me and… and I don't understand why … why don't you come back, why are you pushing me away"

"I'm just trying to…" – Killian tried to explain.

"What has changed?" – Emma continued to say, ignoring Killian's words – "What aren't you telling me? I know that there's something else going on, besides your identity crisis … lately you've been distant, acting like you're haunted by something …" – she added – "You barely touch me"

Instinctively, Killian grabbed her hand and caressed her soft skin.

"You know that's not what I'm talking about" – Emma said, releasing her hand from his – "I know that you're hiding something from me and I need you to tell me what it is so we can fix it" – she insisted.

"Not everything can be solved by talking, by _you_ …" – he yelled, walking towards the balcony door, increasing the distance between them. He had never yelled at her before and Emma realized that he wasn't exactly angry, he was ashamed – "There are things that we can't change; that can't be undone" – he suddenly snapped his head up and turned to look at her – "Things that I don't tell you to protect you"

"Protect me from what?" – Emma shot back.

"I've already said too much" – Killian said, running a frustrated hand across his eyes.

"No you didn't! You didn't say anything!" – she exclaimed.

"Emma, don't …" – he murmured.

"What could possibly endanger me so much that I shouldn't know about it?" – Emma said, approaching him – "What aren't you telling me, Killian?"

"I can't…" – Killian said like he was talking to himself – "This problem is mine…"

"Yes you can …" – Emma said, cupping his face in her hands, making him meet her gaze – "Whatever it is you can tell me. Your problems are my problems. We can fix this" – she added, caressing his cheek.

Killian remained in silence, waiting for the right words to appear so he could tell Emma that everything would be okay again; that nothing was wrong … but the words never came. How could they if they were lies?

The silence was suffocating Emma. She needed to hear him saying that everything was fine; that everything was going to be fine like he always did but instead of that Killian was paralyzed in front of her. He was the one who was good with words, not her.

"We're a team" – Emma spoke again, trying to get a reaction from him.

"Do you remember when I told you what my happy ending was?" – Killian finally said, closing his eyes. Emma just nodded, waiting for him to continue – "I said it was you but … but what if …" – he stopped talking for a few seconds before continuing – "… but what if I'm not _your_ happy ending?"

"What?" – Emma breathed.

She was prepared for anything but that. She was prepared for him to tell her that there was a new villain in town; that there was a new threat; that there was someone threatening them. She never thought that he would say that he wasn't good enough for her; not after all they've been through; not after the life they were building together.

"I want you to have the life that you deserve …" – Killian said, removing her hands from his face – "… even if it's not with me" – he finally said, feeling like he had been stabbed by a knife right into his chest – "Deep down we both know that you're better off without me…" – he added, passing by her, ready to leave the room.

_It was better this way. It was for the best. She would be safe. She would be happy._

"Don't you dare walk away from me" – he suddenly heard Emma saying from the spot he left her – "I'm not letting you do that"

Killian stood frozen on the door frame in silence. He could hear footsteps approaching him.

"I love you" – Emma said, grabbing his arm, making him turn his body to her – "Do you hear me? _I – love – you_. Do you understand that? Do you know what that means?" – she said, feeling the tears rolling down her face – "Answer me!" – she insisted, shaking him.

"Yes …" – he said, his voice barely a whisper.

"So why are you trying to steal my happy ending from me?" – she said.

"I'm just trying to do the right thing" – Killian softly said.

"And leaving me is the right thing?" – Emma asked and suddenly Killian saw, inside her upset eyes, the lost girl; the orphan; the woman who didn't believe that anyone could love her – "Damn it Killian! You're the one who always stays … even when I push you away or yell at you … you always stay" – she nervously said – "When you returned you promised me that I wouldn't lose you. Why are you trying to break that promise?" – Emma said, trying to hide the trembling in her voice – "Because that's what you're going to do if you walk through this door" – she took a deep breath before continuing – "So, unless you don't want to be here, unless you don't lov –"

Emma never had the chance to finish her sentence because before the words could leave her mouth, Killian crashed his lips against hers.

His lips were soft on hers and their bodies seemed to almost sigh with relief at being joined again. Her lips parted and she felt his tongue starting to savor her. His arms wrapped around her waist, pulling her even closer. She moved up one of her hands so she could feel the skin of his neck. She heard him moan into her mouth and felt a jolt of electricity running through her body.

An eternity later, she felt him release her very slowly. They stared at each other's eyes in wonder until he sighed:

"I don't think I could ever stop loving you, Emma"

Even if they were together for more than a year, the way he was looking at her in that moment made her knees weak. His face was only inches from hers.

"Good" – she finally managed to say, making him smile.

His arms came around her waist and he pulled her very close. She leaned into him, letting her head rest on his chest, feeling his lips on her hair.

In that moment she realized how much she had missed him; how much she had wanted her life back.

She still couldn't believe how he could think that she was better off without him; that he shouldn't be in her life.

_The boat trip really messed with his head_ – she thought.

How could he not see that she needed him in her life, now more than ever … and then a thought invaded her mind. Maybe if he knew what was about to happen in less than nine months he would stop thinking that he was not worthy of her. He needed reassurance so that was exactly what she would give him.

"I need to tell you something" – she said, lifting her head so she could see his deep blue eyes.

Killian raised his eyebrow and waited for her to continue. She was smiling which made him smile in return.

"What is it?" – he asked, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear.

Emma opened her mouth to speak but the sound of her phone ringing interrupted her.

"Seriously?" – she said, closing her eyes and shaking her head.

"It must be David" – Killian commented.

Emma grabbed her phone and looked at Killian.

"Hi, David" – Emma said and Killian couldn't help but smile at the way Emma said David's name.

The talk was short and as soon as Emma ended the call Killian spoke:

"We're late, aren't we?"

"According to David's watch yes" – she said as she entered into the bathroom and washed her face – "It seems that there are some problems at the mines … Will invaded the place, again"

"Don't worry. He's probably drunk and the Merry Men got tired of listening that annoying song that he always sings when he drinks too much" – Killian said, seeing the way Emma was walking around the room, taking the clothes from her closet.

"Yeah … I know, I was just getting used to lazy mornings, you know?" – she said as she tried to choose one of the many shirts that were now scattered over the bed – "No villains to run after, no curses to break…"

"What if …" – he said, taking from her hands the shirt that she was holding – "… I make you a special dinner tonight so you can relax and tell me whatever it is that you wanted to tell me?" – Killian suggested, sitting on the bed – "I also need to tell you something" – he added, knowing that was about time for Emma to know about all that was happening so they could return to their lazy mornings and David's complaints.

Emma breathed a soft kiss on his lips – "I'd like that" – she said, grabbing her shirt from his hands – "Now get dress, pirate. We're late, remember?" – she added, throwing at him one of his shirts.

* * *

Rumpelstiltskin was at his pawnshop looking at the scarf that was on the table in front of him. He was looking at it for almost half an hour, trying to figure it out what had happened. He let his mind return to the moment when Emma had cut her hand and completed the spell that allowed them to know that the men were alive.

Some of her blood was now in the scarf that he had used when no one was seeing. He had cleaned some of the savior's blood so he could analyze it later.

He had felt power invading the room the second Emma's blood started to flow and he wanted to know why but the mystery seemed to be far from being solved.

The scarf that was painted red was now blue.

"How is this possible?" – he said to himself.

Blood was supposed to be red, not blue. Something was really happening and he wanted to know what that something was; he needed to know.

He searched for some old books that could have some information about the relation between blood and magic and put them on the table so he could read them later.

Rumpelstiltskin started to put all the information that he knew together, like a puzzle:

_Emma was the savior. The savior was pregnant. The child's father was Killian Jones. Killian Jones was a pirate._

And then of course there was also Milah.

_Milah was alive and had magic; Milah had been alive for three hundred years and wanted to destroy him._

None of the information seemed to be related which confused him even more.

_Why had the blood changed its color? Why had he felt such an amount of power coming from Emma's blood? Why had Milah decided to appear just now?_

"A penny for your thoughts?" – Belle's voice brought him back to reality.

"I was a little distracted, wasn't I?" – he said, putting the scarf in his pocket, before turning his body. He saw his wife smiling at him.

"A little" – Belle said, approaching him – "Is everything alright?"

"Of course. Everything is fine" – Rumpelstiltskin said, smiling at her.

"What's this?" – Belle asked, grabbing one of the books that were scattered over the table – "Blood prophecies" – she read the book's title – "Have you talked with Killian?"

"Why would I talk with the pirate?" – The Dark One asked.

"Well … these last days I've been helping him. He's doing a research about prophecies" – Belle began to explain – "I'm kind of worried about him … He tries to disguise it but I can see there's something troubling him"

"He's been reading books about prophecies?" – Rumpelstiltskin asked intrigued.

"Yeah" – Belle said – "Prophecies about the sea … he also mentioned something about blood made of sea, I think" – she continued to say. After Belle mentioned the word _blood_, Rumpelstiltskin's eyes popped wide open – "Perhaps you know something that can help …"

"I'm sorry" – he said, taking the book from her hands – "This book only speaks about blood, no sea involved"

"That's okay" – Belle said – "I'm sure he'll find the answers that he's looking for. See you at lunch?" – she said before heading to the door.

"Of course" – Rumpelstiltskin said, smiling at his wife

As soon as Belle closed the door, Rumpelstiltskin opened the book and started to read it.

_The answer has to be in here_ – he thought, especially now that he knew exactly what to look for.

The pirate had been looking for prophecies about the sea when he should have looked for prophecies about blood. Almost all of the prophecies about the sea spoke about mermaids and their chants, sirens, ghost ships, treasures hidden under the sea … but blood prophecies spoke about different stuff; more complex stuff and the Dark One was now starting to put all the pieces together, completing the puzzle that had been right in front of him this whole time, because, as usual, the Charming family had created the key ingredient for villains to perform powerful spells, curses or fulfill old prophecies … and the ingredient was what the world has of more innocent – a baby.

* * *

Robin was the one able to put some sense in Will's head and managed to take him out of the mines.

Emma had almost lost her patience when Will decided to use Leroy's pickaxe as a mike and started to sing the most annoying song that she had ever heard but before she could take a step forward and end the singing, Killian grabbed her waist, preventing her from moving. He would not let her go near a drunk guy with a pickaxe in his hand. He put her behind him and started to walk towards Will but then it was Robin's turn to interrupt.

"I have an idea" – he said, touching Killian's shoulder.

Robin grabbed one of the pickaxes that were on the floor and started to imitate Will, singing the same song that the thief was singing.

When Will saw Robin doing the exact same thing that he was doing his enthusiasm grew.

"I can't wait for your bachelor party, mate" – he hysterically said – "It's going to be bloody epic!"

Will started to laugh not noticing that Robin was reaching something from his pocket.

"I was thinking the Rabbit Hole for the party" – Will said and somehow he managed to speak and sing at the same time – "We could hire some strippers … oh, no, no … sorry … they prefer to be called exotic dancers" – he said laughing, putting his free hand on Robin's shoulder – "Shhhh …" – he theatrically said pointing at the other people in the room – "I promise not to tell Regi-"

Will didn't have the chance to finish his sentence because in that moment Robin opened the bottle of water that he was hiding and threw the liquid at Will.

"Bloody hell!" – the thief exclaimed, letting the pickaxe fall.

"Wake up" – Robin simply said – "You're supposed to be at the camp doing your chores"

"Maybe I don't want to do my chores" – Will protested – "The mines are so much more fun and guess what … I'm taller than everyone else" – he added.

"Grow up, Will" – Robin said, shaking his head.

"I don't have to!" – he continued to say – "I'm the taller one, get it?" – he said like he was telling a funny joke.

Robin ignored him and with David's help dragged him out of the mines. Minutes later Will was in his usual cell sound asleep.

Emma and the men were at the station when Henry called Emma informing her that he would spend the night at Regina's again. It seemed that the Mills–Locksley family had planned a movie night, which meant that Killian and Emma would have the house to themselves.

After lunch Killian went home so he could start to prepare their evening.

A few hours later Emma left the sheriff station too with the excuse of go shopping, leaving David and Robin in charge of the town's security.

Once home, Killian started to clean the living room. He wanted the room to be perfect for their evening.

He moved some of the furniture, wiped the dinner table at least three times and eyed the floor almost ten times, looking for any sign of dust. Hours later he began to make dinner, remembering the look on Emma's face the first time he had cooked for her.

She had thought that he was joking when he volunteered to make dinner. He would never forget the surprised look on her face when she tasted the food he made.

_Oh my God! I think Granny's just lost a client_ – he could hear her saying.

He searched for some candles and put them all over the living room.

Dinner was almost ready when he sat on the couch. He was looking at the big wall made of glass that allowed him to see the beach and the waves crashing down on the soft sand. Killian couldn't think of a better place to live as he watched the sun disappear over the horizon with the sea in the foreground. He lightened the candles and waited for Emma to come home.

* * *

Emma was at the docks looking at the different boats that were on the water. She didn't waste much time shopping so she decided to spend some of her free time at the docks. She didn't want to go home and disturb Killian and even if she would never admit it she kind of liked it his surprises.

She couldn't stop thinking that in a few minutes she would tell him about the baby; in a few minutes all would be real.

She was trying to guess what would be his reaction.

_He would be happy, right? _– she said to herself, touching her abdomen – _Relax Emma … just breathe_.

_Believing in even the possibility of a happy ending is a very powerful thing_ – she remembered her mother's words.

"I believe" – Emma murmured to her stomach – "We're going to be fine, little one" – she said, realizing that it was the first time that she spoke to the life that was growing inside of her.

She took her eyes from her belly and looked at the sea, seeing the sun disappear in the water, before starting to make her way to her car.

"You must be Emma" – a voice from behind startled her – "Emma Swan, right?"

Emma turned her body so she could see who was talking.

"I'm sorry, do I know you?" – she asked.

"I'm sure you've heard stories about me" – the stranger in front of her said with a mischievous smile – "I'm Milah"

* * *

**Spoiler for chapter 13: Some people believe that the number 13 is an unlucky number.**


	13. erasing memories

_I love her and that's the beginning and end of everything _— F. Scott Fitzgerald

* * *

_Who's Milah in the tattoo?_

_Someone from a long ago…_

Shock was an understatement for what Emma was feeling as soon as the woman in front of her said those words. She tried to remain with a neutral face but she knew that she wasn't doing a good job at disguising the amount of emotions that were starting to invade her whole body. She couldn't even blame the hormones because she knew that she would feel exactly the same thing if she wasn't pregnant.

Emma never got jealous of Milah. She knew that she was a part of Killian's past as much as Neal was hers. He didn't usually mention her but she knew that Milah had been very important in his life and she was okay with that. She was glad that he had good memories of his past and not only sad ones … but that was what Milah was supposed to be: a memory.

And maybe she was being selfish but she couldn't help it. She wasn't prepared to deal with dead people coming to life. _How was that even possible?_

Emma couldn't stop looking at Milah, quickly noticing how different they were from each other – they were opposites.

She was blonde and Milah was brunet;

She had pale skin and Milah had tanned skin;

She had straight hair and Milah's hair was curly;

Their heights were similar but Milah was a little bit taller than her.

The pirate was wearing jeans and a black shirt that hugged her curves.

The word Milah was echoing in her mind and Emma wanted nothing more than to stop it.

"You're dead" – the words slipped out from her mouth before she even realized it.

"I feel very much alive, actually" – Milah said smiling and Emma quickly realized that she didn't like her smile – "I can see from your reaction that Killian didn't tell you that I was alive"

Emma remained in silence, feeling her heart beat faster than ever, right after she heard the woman in front of her say Killian's name. _He knew about Milah being alive?_

"Well, I suppose that what happens in the Jolly stays in the Jolly" – Milah continued to say, starting to walk around her.

Emma was now more confused than ever. This conversation didn't make any sense. Milah being alive didn't make any sense. She was dead. This person couldn't be Milah, it was impossible … but something inside of Emma told her that the woman wasn't lying. She was telling the truth and somehow Emma refused to believe it; she didn't want to believe it.

"What do you know about the Jolly Roger?" – Emma asked. She needed answers.

"More than you will ever know" – Milah said like she was remembering something and Emma got the feeling that she didn't like what that something was.

"Killian sold the ship –"

"To me" – Milah interrupted her – "Of course he didn't know that at the time, otherwise I doubt we would be having this conversation … He just found out about a week ago, after _I save him_"

Something inside of Emma broke as soon as she heard Milah saying those words. She was supposed to be the one to save him … and not because she was the Savior but because she loved him; because she would do anything for him; because she couldn't imagine her world without him. But she wasn't the one who saved him. Milah was.

She was a failure. She wasn't even capable to perform a locator spell and find him. Pathetic.

"Why are you telling me this?" – Emma asked, trying to compose herself – "Why are you here _now_"

"Oh c'mon Emma, you know why …" – Milah said, her eyes never leaving Emma's – "Killian. I'm here because of Killian"

Deep down Emma already knew the answer but that didn't stop her from feeling nervous.

She started to put the pieces of the puzzle together, realizing that the reason for Killian being so distant these past days was right in front of her – Milah; she was the reason.

_Why didn't he tell her? Why did he make it such a big secret? Was he planning to leave her? Was he in love with Milah? Was he having doubts?_

"I guess it's true what they say …" – Milah said as if she was hearing Emma's thoughts – "_True love _never dies" – she noticed the way Emma's eyes widened and added – "Don't tell me that you thought that the two of you were _true love_…"

_What if you're not his true love? – _she heard again the little voice that had been in her head since she found out about the pregnancy_ – What proof do you have that you are his true love?_

Milah was playing with her fears, her doubts. Emma gripped at the fabric of her jacket above her stomach, preventing her hands from shaking. She couldn't let Milah get inside her head. The woman was trying to provoke her and she was letting her.

"Look, I don't know what kind of sick game are you playing but – " – Emma managed to say but Milah interrupted her before she could finish her sentence.

"I'm not playing any game, _princess_" – Milah said stiffly.

"Oh really?" – Emma said in the same tone of voice, trying to take control of the conversation – "So why did you wait three hundred years to show up in his life again?" – she added, trying to get a reaction from the pirate – "In fact, how are you even alive?"

"It's all about timing" – Milah simply said. Emma opened her mouth to speak again but Milah was faster – "Actually, you should be thanking me … if it wasn't for my absence you would have never met him"

"How do you even know about Killian and I?" – Emma asked.

"You really believe it, don't you?" – Milah said smiling, after a few moments of silence. Emma was trying to figure it out what was Milah talking about when she spoke again – "Your relationship … it isn't real. He doesn't love you"

"Shut up" – Emma murmured, closing her eyes and clenching her hands into white-knuckled fists at her sides.

"You're living a lie" – Milah said the same words she had said to Killian – "You two don't belong toge-"

"Shut up!" – Emma growled, cutting her off with fire in her eyes.

She felt a pulse reverberate through her, a heat that started in her chest and exploded out of her, just like when she lost control with the Ice Queen. Before she even noticed her hands started to shine, shooting towards Milah a ball of light magic.

Emma heard the sound of a pleased laughter and opened her eyes.

"As much as I want to get rid of you for good … now is not the best time" – Milah said smiling – "Let me give you a piece of advice, _princess_" – she continued to say, her voice full of amusement at the same time a barrier protected her from Emma's magic – "Old magic always wins, just like old love can never be replaced. I knew that the second his lips touched mine after three hundred years"

"You're lying" – Emma forced out through gritted teeth.

"Am I?" – Milah asked. Her eyes never leaving Emma's – "Deep down you know that I'm telling the truth" – she said disappearing in a dark smoke.

Emma stood in silence looking at the place where Milah had been, unaware that the pirate had made her lost control on purpose so she would have the confirmation that the prophecy was already in motion.

* * *

Killian was pacing around the living room, running his hand through his hair. He was starting to feel anxious and worried. It was almost 10pm and Emma wasn't home yet. He couldn't really explain but he couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong; that something had happened.

He wanted to call her but he didn't even have his phone. Killian was feeling powerless. He needed to do something.

_Maybe I'm being paranoid_ – he said to himself, sitting on the couch – _Maybe she lost track of time._

He tried to calm himself but all his instincts told him to go find her. He wanted to go search for her but at the same time he didn't want to risk her to come home and find the house empty.

After a few minutes Killian got tired of waiting and headed to the hallway but when he was about to reach the door knob the door opened, showing a distressed Emma on the other side.

"Love" – Killian sighed with relief – "I was starting to get worried" – he said at the same time he tried to hug her but when he approached her she passed by him and ran towards the stairs – "Swan …" – he tried to say but the only reply was the sound of a slamming door.

He immediately ran after her and found their bedroom door closed. Cautiously he grabbed the door knob and turned it under his hand, realizing that the door was not locked.

He saw the back of her body as soon as he opened the door. She was looking at the sea outside the balcony door and even if the door of their room was opened he could see that the walls he had destroyed these last years were now surrounding Emma with a relentless force.

Before he had time to say something, Emma spoke:

"When were you going to tell me?" – she asked, without turning her body to him.

"Swan, I, I don't understand …" – Killian cautiously said, walking towards her – "What are you talking about?"

"Milah!" – Emma blurted, turning her body so she could face him – "I'm talking about Milah! When were you going to tell me that she's alive?" – she nervously said – "Were you even going to tell me or –"

"She's here?" – Killian interrupted her with a nervous voice – "What did she say? Are you hurt? Did she hurt you?" – he said, trying to put his hand on her shoulder and see if she was hurt but she quickly pushed it away.

"Stop!" – Emma exclaimed, walking towards the other side of the room –"Stop acting like you care!"

"Love …" – Killian tried to say.

"Don't _love_ me" – she interrupted him hastily and Killian froze with the double meaning of her sentence – "It all makes sense now …" – she said like she was talking to herself – "… why you never talked about the boat trip; why you barely touched me since you returned; why you avoided me this last week …" – she tried to say sharply but her voice betrayed her.

"Lov-Emma, just let me explain" – Killian said.

"Oh, so now you want to explain?" – Emma said, faking a laugh – "What are you going to say, Killian? Are you going to lie to me and say that you acting like a total different person has nothing to do with her?"

Killian remained impassible and silent. Of course his behavior had everything to do with Milah, but how could he say that to Emma without her jumping into conclusions? She was already jumping into conclusions and for a brief moment he wanted to make her believe that he was still in love with Milah; that what they had was nothing but a lie. If he could convince her of that then she would be safe, her problems would be over, the prophecy would never happen, Milah would be gone … He could end with all the threats with just a few words. He could do the right thing and walk away but as much as he tried to convince himself of that he couldn't. How could that be the right thing?

"I don't love her" – he said, breaking the silence and all the chances of releasing Emma from the curse; from him.

"Why?" – Emma immediately asked.

"Why?" – Killian repeated Emma's words, trying to understand her question.

"She's back … You spent almost three hundred years trying to avenge her death; trying to find a way to kill Gold" – Emma started to explain – "You tattooed her name on your arm" – she said, trying not to look at Killian's arm – "Can you really tell me that you never wished for this to happen? For her to come back … for a second chance with her?" – she said louder.

"Of course I wished for that to happen!" – he exclaimed and Emma bit her lower lip, preventing the tears from falling – "But that was before I met _you_!" – he emphasized.

Silence invaded the room. Emma looked at Killian's blue eyes full of promises. She wanted to believe in those promises.

His eyes were like the sea – beautiful and dangerous; it was like that even if you knew that you would drown you would dive in anyway.

"So why did you lie?" – she asked, breaking the silence – "Why didn't you just tell me what was going on?"

"Because …" – Killian said, still flustered – "… she's a part of my past, which means that she's _my _problem … I brought her here. She's here because of _me_ … I'm the one ruining everything …" – he said, running a frustrated hand across his face – "I wanted to find a way to fix all of this before I tell you about her … I wanted to find a way to protect you but instead of that I'm putting you and our family even more in danger"

Emma remained in silence after hearing Killian's disturbed speech, looking at him. He seemed worried and vulnerable as he waited for her response. She searched for a lie in his eyes but she found none.

"Earlier, this morning, you said that you had something to say to me" – Emma said – "You were going to tell me this at dinner" – she stated, it wasn't a question.

"Aye" – Killian said, nodding at the same time and Emma knew that he was telling the truth – "I couldn't keep this from you anymore … I couldn't stand the thought of you thinking that was pushing you away; that I didn't love you anymore"

As soon as Killian ended his sentence Emma ran towards him and wrapped her arms around his body. He was taken aback for a second before encircling her waist, bringing her closer without even thinking. Almost unconsciously he released a huge sigh of relief.

"I was scared that I would lose you" – Emma whispered, burrowing her face on his chest – "I _am_ scared" – she corrected herself. Before Killian could say something in return she spoke again – "She said that you kissed her …" – Emma softly said with her head still resting on his chest. She felt his body tensing and raised her head a bit so she could see his face – "Did you?" – she asked, releasing herself from the embrace, suddenly feeling nervous – "Did you kiss her?"

"No …" – Killian said after a few seconds of silence, trying to disguise his nervous with a smile.

Emma smiled back and Killian relaxed a little but then he realized that Emma's smile wasn't a smile of happiness. She knew that he was lying. _Of course she knew…_

"I almost believed you" – she said and Killian saw her smile disappear at the same time she shook her head.

"It's not what you're thinking" – Killian tried to explain as Emma increased the distance between them – "_She_ kissed me … I, I was in shock … I shouldn't have let her do that but … but I didn't have time to react and –"

"Spare me the details!" – Emma yelled, interrupting him and suddenly he froze – "You're … you're a liar … You've been lying to me about everything, about you, about me …"

"Swan …" – he continued to say – "It didn't mean anything … as soon as I realized what was happening I stopped … I stopped her" – he added – "There is nothing going on between Mil-"

"Just leave …" – Emma interrupted him with a trembling voice, without looking at him, trying not to cry. _She would not cry in front of him._

"Love, please, just …"

"I'm not your love" – she said, turning her back so he couldn't see her face – "I never was… It was wrong from the beginning" – she added.

She could still feel his presence in the room. She could feel his eyes on her back and without even looking at him she knew that his eyes were clouded with pain and vulnerability. He was the one who always stayed; who never leaves … and now she was telling him to go, to leave. She put her hand over her flat stomach. _It always ends this way, doesn't it?_

"Get out, _Hook_!" – she said, her voice stronger this time despite the tears that were running down her cheeks. Her bottom lip was trembling but somehow she managed to keep herself together. She knew that saying those words and calling him by his moniker would hurt him.

Killian's body was tensed and rigid. Hearing Emma say those words to him made his heart clench and the worst part was that the only person that he could blame was himself. He did this. He ruined all that they were building.

He could see the small trembling in Emma's body and all he wanted to do was take her into his arms and protect her from the world, but he couldn't. He was the reason of her suffering. He was the one to blame, so he did the last thing he wanted to do – he walked away and Emma was almost sure that she heard him whispering the words _As you wish_ as he left the room.

* * *

After dinner Regina and the boys sat on the couch with a box full of DVDs, preparing themselves for their movie night. A few minutes later, after some arguing, they eventually decided what movie they were going to watch.

"C'mon Robin" – Regina said from the living room. She was seated between Roland and Henry – "We're all waiting for the popcorns … and you" – she teased.

"Just a minute" – he said from the kitchen.

"Are you sure you don't want to choose another movie, honey?" – Regina asked Roland.

The little boy shook his head at the same time he played with the DVD cover.

"Mom, relax …" – Henry said.

"I don't want him to have nightmares" – Regina whispered to Henry, so Roland didn't hear what she was saying.

"And he won't" – Henry said – "He already saw Pan's shadow and a flying monkey. He's tough, besides it's just a movie"

Regina nodded and turned her attention to the other boy seated beside her.

"This is just a movie, sweetie" – Regina said, caressing Roland's hair – "None of it is real"

Henry tried not to laugh after hearing Regina's sentence.

"Harry Potter and The Sorcerer's stone?" – Robin said, seating next to Roland, reading the cover of the movie that his son was holding in his hands – "What is it about?"

"Magic" – Henry said with a smile.

"At least we're not going to see those annoying foxes, again" – Robin said, giving him the popcorn bucket – "How could they portray me as a fox?" – he said, remembering the day they watched _Robin Hood _and the characters were all humanoid animals.

"You should have seen Killian's reaction when he saw _Peter Pan_" – Henry said smiling – "His jaw almost hit the ground when he saw the infamous Captain Hook" – he continued to say, remembering Killian's face – "After that day I could never find the movie again. I think he hid it" – he added, turning off the lights of the room.

The movie started and all the eyes were on the TV. Just like every kid, Roland loved watching TV. His big brown eyes were focused on the screen and he started to laugh when Harry's cousin fell into the snake's cage or when the Sorting Hat started to talk. Regina was about to make a comment about the accuracy of the magical items and spells when she felt Henry's head lying on her shoulder.

An hour later and Robin was the only one who was still watching the movie. He took his eyes from the TV and turned his head to the left only to find his family sound asleep beside him. Roland's head was lying on Regina's lap, while his fiancée's head was close to Henry's.

He took the TV remote control from Roland's hand and stopped the movie. He touched carefully Roland's body trying not to wake him and carried him to his room. Then, he returned to the living room and did the same thing with Henry. Finally, after climbing up and down the stairs for the fourth time he lifted Regina's body from the couch, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear. He heard her mumbling something that he couldn't quite understand as he carried her bride stile. He put her in their bed and kissed her forehead before leaving the room.

He made his way to the living room so he could finish watching the movie but after a few minutes he heard someone knocking at the door.

He looked at the watch on his wrist and saw that was almost 1am.

Once again he heard the knock on the door. He jumped from the couch and opened the door before the noise could wake Regina and the boys.

"Killian?" – Robin said as soon as he opened the door – "What are you doi– Are you drunk?" – he asked seeing the flask that Killian was holding in his hand.

"Unfortunately no" – Killian said a little bit louder than usual – "I apologize for the invasion" – he said as he passed by Robin, giving him his flask – "Granny's was already closed … I didn't have anywhere to go …"

"You're lucky Regina is already asleep" – Robin said, closing the door. He found Killian seated on the couch, covering his face with his hand – "What happened?" – he asked, seating next to his friend.

"How do you do it?" – Killian asked, not answering Robin's question –"How can you be a husband and a father and …" – he started to babble – "I mean ... I thought I could do it, I thought I could be that, you know …" – he continued to say, without looking at his friend – "I wanted to … I _want_ to but now … now it's over" – he sighed – "I ruined everything"

"Killian, what happened?" – Robin asked again, making Killian look at him. He noticed that his eyes were red.

"She found out" – Killian said – "Emma found out about Milah before I could find a way to fix all of this" – he explained.

"You can still fix this" – Robin said – "Sure, Emma might be hurt right now because you didn't tell her about your dead wife but that doesn't mean that she won't forgive you … that the two of you can't fix this" – he tried to explain.

Suddenly Emma and Milah's voice invaded Killian's head.

_It was wrong from the beginning_

_The child's mother is the savior and the father has the sea running into his veins_

_Get out, Hook!_

_As soon as the heart leaves its body the child will immediately die_

_It was wrong from the beginning_

_The child's mother is the savior and the father has the sea running into his veins_

_Get out, Hook!_

_As soon as the heart leaves its body the child will immediately die_

_It was wrong from the beginning_

_The child's mother is the savior and the father has the sea running into his veins_

_Get out, Hook!_

_As soon as the heart leaves its body the child will immediately die_

"Work things out with Emma" – Robin's voice interrupted Killian's torture.

"It's really bad, mate" – Killian said, getting up from the couch, trying to clear his head. He started to pace around the room – "She told me to leave"

"Just talk to her …" – Robin insisted – "and remember what you always say" – he continued to say, remembering Killian of his own words: _A man not willing to fight for what he wants deserves what he gets_ – "Besides, since Emma is going to be Regina's maid of honor I'm really going to need my best man to be getting along with her"

Robin's words made Killian stop pacing and look at his friend. _Best man?_

"Whoa … I …" – he tried to find the right words to say while Robin couldn't help but smile at Killian's reaction – "I … I don't know what to say …" – he cleared his throat – "I'm honored. Thank you, mate" – he said smiling, forgetting his own problems for a moment – "I didn't know you would –"

"Pick you?" – Robin completed his sentence – "Why not?"

"I, I don't know" – Killian said laughing – "You could have picked one of the Merry Men"

"Will?" – Robin asked, raising his eyebrow – "He probably would miss the wedding"

"What about David?" – Killian asked.

"You and David are my best friends" – Robin started to explain – "But you and I … we used to be outlaws and we got a second chance here in this world" – he said – "Besides, who's better than a pirate to be the best man of a thief?"

"Thank you" – Killian softly said.

"You're welcome" – Robin replied, getting up from the couch – "What do you say we get you a room and tomorrow you work things out with Emma?"

Killian nodded and followed Robin. They passed by Henry's bedroom and Killian stopped next to the door that was half opened. He could see Henry sound asleep in his bed.

"Don't tell the lad that I'm here" – he said to Robin with a low voice –"I don't want him to –"

"Don't worry" – Robin said gently, placing a sympathetic hand on his friend shoulder.

* * *

Before coming to Storybrooke Emma never cried. She used to cry when she was a little girl in the foster system but after that she promised never to cry again; not even when Neal left her and she found out that she was pregnant with Henry.

Everything changed since she found Storybrooke; since she found her family; since she found _him_.

As soon as Killian left the room she let herself fall on the bed and allowed herself to cry. She was crying and she hated it.

After all they've been through. After all of his promises. After all of his reassurances. After she allowed him to know her. It was all a lie. He was a liar. He was just like Neal and her foster families. He hurt her … and she hurt him back. She allowed herself to be vulnerable; to open her heart. She told him her deepest fears – _I was scared that I would lose you. I am scared – _and all this time he was just pretending; pretending to care; pretending to love her.

She took a deep breath trying to calm herself and stop the sobs. She sat on the bed and wiped away the tears. She let out a heavy breath and looked around the empty room. She was alone. She had told him to get out and he did. Why was she feeling so bad if she was the one who asked him to go? Why was she feeling so hollow if he did exactly what she asked him to do?

Her eyes caught the sight of something. She got out of bed and grabbed the bag that was lying on the floor. She opened it and saw the phone that she had bought for Killian, after she left the sheriff station. He had lost his during the boat trip so Emma took the opportunity to buy him a new one. Tears started to sting in her eyes again and she put the phone in the bag.

Emma opened her closet and started to take some of her clothing from it.

_Where is it? – s_he said to herself.

She continued to search. Her shirts were now scattered on the floor. She opened one of the drawers of the closet, only to find it full of panties and socks. She opened another one and she found it, hidden under a scarf. She grabbed it and sat on the bed.

Minutes passed and Emma was still looking at the small box in front of her. The letters _E_ and _K _were engraved on the top of the wooden box. Emma bit her lower lip and opened it.

_I'm not a sentimental person _– a lie she used to tell to herself.

The box was not full, nevertheless it had almost the same number of things that her old childhood box had.

The first thing that she saw when she opened the box was the red rose that Killian had given her on their first date. She had cast a spell on it, preventing it from dying.

Then she saw the little piece of cloth stained with blood; her blood. It was the cloth Killian had used to clean her cut on the beanstalk.

Memories started to invade her mind and she wanted to close the box but she couldn't.

She saw the compass that Killian and she had found on her little adventure. There was also a copy of the page of Henry's book where the two of them appeared.

She felt her stomach hurt when she saw the stick of the pregnancy test inside the box. She didn't know why she kept it; why she kept it in there. Maybe because in her deepest fantasies she could see herself, ten years later, opening that same box and smile at that little stick.

Suddenly, she grabbed the box and let the objects fall over the bed. She grabbed the rose and destroyed it, then she tore the piece of cloth and the image of Killian and her dancing on the King Midas's ball, feeling the tears running down her cheeks. She broke the compass and the pregnancy test and threw the box to the floor.

She was not a sentimental person.

* * *

Killian was lying in bed with his eyes opened, staring at the ceiling. He couldn't sleep. Emma's words were stuck in his head and he kept remember their fight. How could she forgive him? How could he forgive himself?

He shouldn't have left. He should have stayed and explain to her everything. But instead of that he left. He did what she asked. _What she asked._ She asked him to go … to leave her. She didn't want him in her life anymore. He was alone again.

_You can join us and be a part of something, or you can do what you can do best, and be alone._ She was right, maybe he was better alone. The problem was that he didn't know how to be alone anymore, not since he met her.

He got out of bed. The house was quiet as he made his way down the stairs. He was the only one awake. Robin, Regina and the boys were sound asleep. He entered in the kitchen and opened the cupboard, trying to find a cup, when suddenly the lights came on.

"I think I told you that I don't do rum" – he heard Regina say from the doorframe.

She was wearing a silk robe and Killian immediately noticed why he hadn't heard her footsteps – she was barefoot.

"I was just searching for a cup" – Killian said – "You usually have some tea in the fridge"

"Seat down, pirate" – Regina said, opening one of the kitchen's cabinets – "You don't need tea, you need this and a pep talk" – she said showing him a bottle of red wine.

She put two glasses on the table and sat on the chair in front of Killian. She opened the bottle and filled the glasses with wine.

"What are you doing here?" – Regina asked, after drinking some of her wine.

"I was thirsty" – Killian said – "I was looking for something non-alcoholic to drink" – he added and Regina gave him a look – "Not that I'm complaining" – he said, grabbing the glass of wine.

"No, Killian" – Regina said –"What are you doing _here_? Aren't you supposed to be at home?"

Killian drank some of his wine before answering:

"So Robin didn't tell you … I see …" – he said, touching the glass of wine with his fingers.

"No, he told me" – she corrected him – "I'm just waiting for you to tell me the rest of the story" – she added and Killian tensed – "You can start talking"

"Regina, I really don't kn –" – Killian tried to say.

"Cut the crap, Killian" – Regina interrupted him –"I used to be the Evil Queen. I know when a story is over and something tells me that you just told Robin the beginning"

"So what part of the story do you know?" – Killian said, after a few seconds of silence, filling the glasses with more wine.

"The part that your ex-wife is alive and almost killed my fiancé" – she started to say – "Robin mentioned that she faked her own death and that now your life is linked to hers" – she added – "She's Gold's wife, isn't she?"

"Aye" – Killian softly said – "She has magic"

"Powerful magic" – Regina said.

"What do you mean?" – Killian asked.

"Well, since she's alive for almost three hundred years, her magic is almost as strong as Rumpelstiltskin's" – she explained. Noticing the worried expression on Killian's face, Regina spoke again – "Robin told me that she has the Jolly Roger and that Emma found out about her. Did she talk with her?"

Killian nodded.

"What is the rest of the story, Killian?" – Regina asked, her eyes never leaving Killian's – "If she has a ship and magic why did she appear just now?"

Killian sighed, covering his face with his hand. He couldn't keep the secret anymore.

"Because of the prophecy" – he murmured.

"Prophecy? What prophecy?" – Regina asked.

"The prophecy about Emma and me" – he said, looking at Regina. She remained in silence, waiting for him to continue – "Milah said that the whole point of Emma and me being together is because we are destined to create a baby with the power of immortality" – he started to explain – "The child's heart will have the power to save and cure; the power to concede an eternal life"

Regina's eyes widened at the mention of a baby but Killian was so focused on the prophecy that he didn't notice the Queen's reaction.

"Isn't that a good thing?" – she asked, trying to disguise her nerves.

"The only way for anyone to have access to the baby's power is by performing a spell" – Killian continued to say, remembering Milah's words – "The _undying spell_" – he stopped talking for a few seconds – "The baby has to die, Regina" – he finally said.

"What?" – Regina breathed, trying to process what Killian had just said.

"And it's all my fault" – Killian exclaimed, shaking his head – "The baby will have this power, this _curse_, because I'm the father, because my blood is made of sea, because I found Emma"

"This is not your fault. Do you hear me? This is not your fault" – Regina said, reaching for his hand – "That woman will not go near your baby, I promise" – Killian looked at Regina with a confused expression but before he could say anything Regina spoke again – "What happened?" – she suddenly asked, noticing the piece of cloth that he had wrapped around his arm, above his wrist – "Are you hurt?"

"It's nothing" – Killian said, releasing his hand from Regina's.

The shirt that Robin had borrowed him didn't cover his arms and that was why Regina noticed the piece of cloth around his arm.

After Emma told him to leave he didn't come directly to Regina and Robin's house. He decided to go to the docks and it was there that in a fit of rage he ripped some of his shirt and covered his tattoo with it.

_You tattooed her name on your arm. You tattooed her name on your arm. You tattooed her name on your arm. You tattooed her name on your arm. You tattooed her name on your arm. __You tattooed her name on your arm. __You tattooed her name on your arm. __You tattooed her name on your arm._

At least now he didn't have to look at the tattoo with the name of the person who had destroyed his life.

"It doesn't seem like nothing" – Regina insisted.

"I ripped some of my shirt so I could cover the tattoo" – Killian explained – "Her name is on the tattoo"

"You tattooed Megan's name on your arm?" – Regina asked.

"Her name is Milah" – Killian corrected her.

"Let me see it" – Regina said, grabbing his arm and taking the piece of cloth off his arm before Killian could even protest – "I can erase it, if you want to"

"You can?" – Killian asked, with his eyes full of hope.

Regina rolled her eyes and suddenly a ball of fire appeared on her hand.

"Megan isn't the only one who has magic" – she said and Killian couldn't help but smile when Regina said the name Megan instead of Milah – "So, do you want me to do it, or not?"

"Yes, I want you to do it" – Killian stated.

"Are you sure?" – Regina asked again.

"Yes, Regina, I'm sure" – Killian said.

"Alright then" – Regina said, touching Killian's arm – "This might sting a little" – she added. After a few seconds, Regina lifted Killian's arm – "All done. No more Megan"

Killian looked at his arm, not believing in what his eyes were seeing. Milah's name was gone. His arm was clean again.

"Thank you" – he said, taking his eyes from his arm so he could look at Regina.

Before Regina could say _you're welcome_,a voice interrupted her.

"Should I be concerned that my soon to be wife is drinking with another man?" – Robin said from the doorframe.

Both Killian and Regina laughed.

"He's already taken" – Regina teased Robin as he seated on the chair next to her – "Besides, he's your best man and soon he will be married with my maid of honor, so…" – Robin opened his mouth to protest but before he could say anything Regina gave him a quick kiss on his lips – "We were just talking about Megan" – she added.

"Who's Megan?" – Robin asked confused.

"Killian's ex-dead-wife" – Regina said.

"Her name is Milah and she was never my wife" – Killian corrected her, rolling his eyes.

"So you really did make him tell the rest of the story" – Robin said to Regina.

"I told you I could make him talk" – Regina said.

"In case both of you didn't notice I'm right here" – Killian said, raising his eyebrows at Regina and Robin.

"Are you going to share the rest of the story with me, mate, or should I continue to talk with my soon to be wife?" – Robin asked.

Killian took a deep breath and started to explain to Robin what he had said to Regina minutes ago. He added some information about the prophecy, like the fact that contrary to most people, the child would immediately die if anyone ripped its heart out of its chest.

"Maybe this was for the best" – Killian said after telling them about the prophecy – "Maybe Emma and I being apart is for the best, at least this way the prophecy will never happen"

"Killian, you have to go home" – Regina said with a serious voice – "You have to tell Emma about this"

"Did you not hear what I just said?" – Killian nervously said – "Milah is in town. She wants this prophecy to happen and the only way to prevent that is if I stay away from Emma"

"Listen to me" – Regina said approaching her face to him – "You can't stop living your life because some ghost of your past showed up in town and wants to fulfill some twisted prophecy" – she continued to say – "Just look at Snow and Charming … Zelena wanted to use Neal to perform her time travel spell. Babies can be used in many spells but that doesn't mean that you should live the rest of your life in fear just because you're afraid that something or someone will hurt your child" – she explained – "You're not alone. We can help you defeat Me-Milah"

Killian remained in silence looking at Regina. He wanted to believe in her words. He wanted to fix things with Emma and return home.

"You really believe that?" – he asked, breaking the silence.

"Yes" – Regina declared – "Emma and I have magic and from what you told me Milah is also threatening Gold so I'm sure we can use his magic as well" – she added – "But you have to tell Emma the truth. She needs you" – _more than you know,_ she said to herself, realizing from Killian's speech that Emma didn't tell him that he was going to be a father.

* * *

**Hello dear readers! **

**I know that there's a lot of angst in this chapter but I promise that things will be better in the next chapter.**

**Thank you so much for reading this story and please don't forget to tell me what you think!**

**Love you guys (:**


	14. no more secrets

**Yesterday was my birthday (I'm twenty now), so I decided to give you a present! I really really really hope you like it!**

**Happy reading dear readers!**

* * *

_Some of us have hearts, you know. Some of us don't give up on true love_ — Sophie Kinsella

* * *

Emma woke up with the sound of the waves crashing down on the soft sand outside the balcony door and the morning sun touching her face. She didn't remember when she had fallen asleep but it was clear that she had. Being pregnant made her feel more tired and sleepy.

She was still wearing the clothes from the day before. She sat up rubbing her eyes but when she looked around the room she saw the mess that she had made. All her memories were scattered on the floor. She immediately got out the bed and ran till the place where the broken box was. She grabbed it carefully and her eyes became wet. The top of the wooden box was still intact and she could still see the letters _E_ and _K _engraved on it.

_She kissed me … I, I was in shock … I shouldn't have let her do that but … but I didn't have time to react. It didn't mean anything … as soon as I realized what was happening I stopped … I stopped her. Love, please, just …_

Killian's words started to invade her mind and she bit her lower lip.

She hadn't let him explain. She didn't want to hear him. She told him to leave.

_He didn't want to leave … you know that _– a small voice in her head started to say –_ If he wanted to he would have left the second Milah appeared, but he didn't._

She tightened her grip on the box. She wanted to blame him but now, thinking about all that happened, she realized that she was not exactly angry at him; she was angry at herself.

He had told her that he was going to tell her about Milah. He was going to but … he was scared; scared of her reaction; scared of scaring her.

_He was scared_… like she was scared.

She was scared and she did what she always does: she pushed people away and then she ran.

No, she wouldn't run. Not this time. She wouldn't run. Not from him.

_I don't think I could ever stop loving you, Emma – _she heard the words Killian had said before all this mess started.

She needed to fix this. She needed him.

Emma looked at the box on her hands and then to the rest of the broken objects. She couldn't destroy their life like that, especially now that they were creating a new life.

"I can fix this" – she softly said.

She started to think of all the times that Killian made her laugh; all the times that Killian surprised her; all the times that Killian kissed her; all the times that Killian caressed her skin; all the times that Killian woke up by her side; all the times that Killian made her dance; all the times that Killian found her; all the times that Killian made her feel alive and loved and happy …

She opened her eyes, feeling the wooden box on her hands heavier. The box was perfect again.

Emma's eyes were shinning. She opened the box and saw all the things that she had destroyed; that she thought that she had lost intact … and once again her box was full of hope and possibility.

She headed to the bathroom and took a quick shower.

A calming sensation went through her as the warm water hit her body but then a scary thought invaded her mind, making her shiver: _What if he really left? What if he is not in town anymore?_

_No, no, no, no…_

She turned off the water and grabbed the first shirt and jeans she found and a pair of her black boots. Her hair was piled messily on top of her head.

She searched for the key of her car and left the house.

* * *

Killian waited until Regina and the boys left the house before he got out of his room. He didn't want Henry to know that he had spent the night there. There was no need to worry the boy. Emma and he were going to fix everything and things would return to normal.

After his talk with Regina and Robin, Killian returned to his room trying to get some sleep but he couldn't. Every time he closed his eyes all he could see was Emma's disappointed face. He spent the whole night looking at the ceiling, trying to erase the last words that Emma had said to him.

Regina and Robin were right. He could fix this. He could have his life back. He didn't need to live in fear anymore. He had a family and friends now. He was not alone anymore.

He took off the shirt that Robin had borrowed him and entered in the bathroom. He looked at himself in the mirror and immediately noticed the clean skin of his right arm. He touched the place where the tattoo had been in these last three hundred years and smiled. He felt relieved, like some curse had been broken.

He took a quick shower and then he went to the kitchen. He drank a cup of coffee and ate a piece of pie that Regina had made.

After his quick breakfast he made his way to his and Emma's house before Regina had the time to return home and start complaining about his presence on her house.

He opened the door slowly, preparing himself to face Emma. This time he was going to tell her everything, even if she yelled at him and tell him to leave, he would tell her.

The house was quiet as he made his way to the living room.

_Maybe she's still asleep_ – Killian thought.

He ran to the stairs and found the door of their bedroom half opened. Cautiously he opened the door but he saw no one in the room. His heart started to beat faster than ever. He wanted to see her, he _needed_ to see her. The thought of Emma hating him was killing him. She needed to know the truth and he wanted to tell her but she was not at home.

_Why wasn't she at home?_

She wasn't a morning person. Usually he was the one who had to drag her out of bed. She was supposed to be asleep. Her golden hair was supposed to be elegantly scattered on his chest, hiding her cheeks from the sun, looking like a fiery halo. One of her hands was supposed to be around the bare expanse of his torso. She was supposed to be in his arms … but she wasn't.

He approached the bed and saw a strange object on it – a wooden box. He had never seen that box before.

He sat on the bed and grabbed the small box. He immediately saw the _E_ and _K_ letters engraved on the top of the wooden box. He touched the letters gently with his fingers. Emma had a box with their initials letters engraved on it.

He remembered the day she had shown him her childhood box but he had no idea that she had another box; a beautiful box about them.

He couldn't take his eyes from the small object on his hand and suddenly a thought invaded his mind – Emma had been with that box on her hands as well otherwise the wooden box would be hidden wherever Emma hid it.

The box was perfectly fine which meant that this box was important to Emma … and whatever was inside of it.

Unconsciously his hand started to open the wooden box but when Killian noticed his action he stopped. It was _bad form_ to invade Emma's privacy like that.

He put the box on the bed and made his way out of the room. He was going to find her.

* * *

Regina was in her office when she heard someone knocking on the door.

_The pirate, again? – _she thought as she headed to the hallway.

She opened the front door ready to protest with the pirate but the person in front of her was not Killian.

"Emma?" – Regina asked, looking at her friend – "What are you doi-"

"Do you know where Killian is?" – Emma interrupted her with a trembling voice.

_Great, the pirate totally ignored my advices_ – Regina said to herself – _Why the hell didn't he search for Emma, like I told him to?_

"We had a fight and he didn't sleep at home" – Emma continued to say.

"I know" – Regina said. Emma looked at her confused – "He spent the night here"

"He spent the night here …" – Emma repeated Regina's words – "So he didn't –"

"Leave town?" – Regina completed Emma's sentence – "Of course he didn't. He was miserable. I'm pretty sure he didn't even sleep" – she continued to say, hand coming out to guide her to inside the house – "And you didn't even tell him about the baby"

"I was going to …" – Emma said, watching Regina closing the front door – "but then –"

"Meg-Milah appeared" – Regina completed Emma's sentence again – "The pirate and I had a little chat" – she explained, noticing the confused look on Emma's face.

"He knew that she was alive and he didn't tell me, Regina" – Emma said.

"Neither did you" – Regina said with a judgy look, referring to the baby – "Besides, you're not mad at him because he didn't tell you about his dead ex-wife, you're mad because you're afraid that you might lose you him to her" – Emma remained in silence, looking at her friend –"And before that could happen you pushed him away"

"Don't you get it? Everything was fine!" – Emma exclaimed – "Killian and I … we were fine, we were good but since I found out about the baby it's like everything is falling apart …" – she continued to say – "It's like I'm cursed or something …"

"You're not" – Regina stated – "You're the savior, you can't be cursed" – she added.

"I just want things to get back to normal, you know?" – Emma sighed.

"So work things out with Killian" – Regina gently said – "Don't push him away, especially not now" – she added – "I'll pick up Henry from school so he can stay here tonight"

Emma nodded and left Regina's house. She was going to find him.

* * *

Killian entered in the sheriff station. His eyes immediately caught David seated at his desk, reading some files.

He passed by David and opened one of the doors of the sheriff station, trying to find any sign of Emma.

"Good morning, Dave. Sorry I'm late. Can I help you with something?" – David ironically said, turning his body to face Killian.

Killian ignored his words and continued to search for Emma. Seeing the way Killian was acting, David approached him.

"Hey, what's wrong?" – he asked, grabbing Killian's arm.

"Where's Emma?" – Killian asked, unable to hide his nervousness.

David looked at his friend and immediately noticed the bags under Killian's eyes and that his hair was mussed.

"I don't know … she didn't show up today"– David said – "Did something happen? Is something wrong with my daughter?"

Killian stood in silence looking at David; seeing the concern in his eyes – the concern about a daughter, the type of concern that he would never experience.

"It's nothing, David" – Killian said, interrupting the silence – "I just need to talk to her, that's all…"

"You're not leaving this station until you tell me what is really going on" – David said, preventing Killian from reaching the front door.

Killian ran a frustrated hand through his hair. David remained in silence waiting for him to talk.

"We had a fight last night…" – Killian said after he took a deep breath. David opened his mouth to speak but Killian cut him off – "… and before you can give me some stern lecture, _yes_ it was my fault and _yes_ I should have told her the truth…" – he added – "and she had every right to _kick me out_ of the house" – he murmured.

"So she knows …" – David said, referring to the fact of Milah being alive.

"She knows…" – Killian repeated.

David grabbed the phone of the sheriff station and tried to call Emma. After a few seconds he hung up the phone.

"She didn't answer the phone" – he said, sitting on his chair but when he looked at the spot where Killian was he didn't see his friend.

He heard the sound of a door closing and wished Killian a silent good luck already certain that if anyone could find his daughter that person was Killian Jones.

* * *

Emma was about to go search for Killian in the sheriff station when she had a better idea – the docks. _Yes, Killian would be there. _

She entered in her car and made her way to the docks. Her whole body started to be invaded by guilt.

_If she hadn't told him to leave …_ _God, why did she keep doing that? Why did she keep pulling away from the people she loved?_

_He was miserable_ – she could hear Regina's words and immediately felt like someone had punched her in her stomach.

Honestly, she would feel devastated if she had heard the same words that she had told Killian:

_You're a liar … _

_You've been lying to me about everything, about you, about me …_

_I'm not your love … I never was … _

_It was wrong from the beginning_

Tears started to sting in her eyes, blurring her vision. She took a deep breath, trying to fight the tears from falling. She was not going to cry; she was tired of crying.

A few minutes later and she found herself at the docks. She immediately got out of her yellow bug and ran to the boat house.

Emma called for his name but there was no response. She looked around the room, searching for him but all that she found were lonely boats.

She got out of the boat house and started to search around the docks near the water, where the boats were moored.

She detected some movement and approached one of the boats. As she walked till the place where she thought she had seen a shadow of a person she started to hear some voices – men voices.

Emma felt all eyes on her as soon as she arrived at the spot where a group of at least ten men were chatting and eating. They all stopped when they saw her. She had never seen these men before.

"Hi" – she awkwardly said, breaking the silence – "I'm the Sheriff of Storybrooke" – she said, clearing her throat, trying to look like a Sheriff and not a lost girl – "I'm looking for a person … uhh, a man … dark hair, blue eyes … his names is –"

"Killian Jones" – one of the men completed her sentence.

"Yeah" – Emma said, looking at the man that had spoken –"I'm sorry but … how do you know him? I'm pretty sure I've never seen you before"

"He was the one who saved me – _us_" – he said pointing at the men around him. Emma looked at him with a confused look – "From the Captain" – the man explained, noticing that Emma was not following – "We are – _were_ –members of the crew of the Jolly Roger. The Captain held us prisoners, uhh, she had our hearts so she was able to control us"

Emma tried to put all the pieces of the puzzle together but none of what this man was saying made sense. Her father had told her that they had been rescued by some fishermen that were passing near the island and these men were clearly not fishermen, they looked like pirates.

The man had also mentioned the Jolly Roger which meant that her father had lied to her and she had believed it. She had felt so guilty for not being able to find them that her super power didn't detect her father's lie and she had actually believed in him. Killian had probably asked him to tell that ridiculous story so he could hide what really happened.

"By Captain you mean Milah, right?" – Emma asked, trying to remain with a neutral face at the thought of the pirate. Milah's words about the Jolly started to make sense now.

"Aye" – the crewman said – "And you must be Emma" – before Emma could ask how this complete stranger knew her name the man spoke again – "I heard your husband and the two other men talking about you" – he explained.

Emma was about to correct the man about Killian being her husband but the words never left her mouth – "What's your name?"

"I'm Thomas" – he said.

"So, Thomas, you said that Killian helped you …" – Emma said, trying to get some answers.

"Aye, thanks to him we have our hearts again" – Thomas said – "He had my heart in his hand … he could have crushed it but he didn't. He saved me" – he added – "He clearly knows what _good form_ means"

Emma smiled. Hearing Thomas talking like that about Killian made her feel proud of the man she had chosen to spend the rest of her life with; the hero he had become … and as much as she wanted to continue to hear the crewman talk about what happened in the Jolly Roger she needed to find Killian.

"I'm looking for him" – she said, looking at the rest of the men, sounding like a true captain talking to her crew – "Did any of you see him?"

The men shook their heads.

She looked at Thomas but the man gave her the same answer than the rest of the crew.

"Thank you" – she softly said before heading to her car, feeling lonelier than ever.

* * *

Killian was passing by the Storybrooke Elementary School when he saw someone running in his direction. He immediately hid the pain in his eyes with a soft smile.

"Hi, lad" – he said, smiling at Henry.

"Hi" – the boy said, sounding a little nervous.

"Is everything alright?" – Killian asked, noticing Henry's strange behavior. _Did he know about their fight?_

"Yeah … hmm, school stuff, that's all" – Henry said – "What are you doing here? Aren't you a little bit old for school? "

Killian raised his eyebrow and smirked, reacting the same way he always did when Emma tease him about his age.

"I'm looking for your mother" – he said – "Do you know where she is?"

"No … the class ended just now, I'm on my lunch break" – Henry said – "I didn't speak with her today. Is something wrong? Did something happen?" – he asked.

"No, no, no, everything is fine" – Killian immediately said – "I just needed to talk to her but I lost my phone so …"

"Did you try the sheriff station?" – Henry asked.

"Aye … she's not there" – Killian said.

"Maybe she's in the loft with grandma" – Henry suggested.

"Perhaps she is" – he said, faking a smile. He had checked the loft just a few minutes ago and she wasn't there – "See you at home, lad. Don't eat too many fries" – he said before turning his body and start to walk again.

"Yeah …" – Henry softly said. He watched as Killian started to turn away. _C'mon Henry, just ask him,_ a little voice inside his head murmured – "Da-Killian wait!" – he suddenly said, making Killian turn his body to him – "I need to ask you something" – he added, making his way towards him.

"What is it?" – Killian asked, looking at Henry.

"Hmm … it's a school project … uhh, we have to pick a family member and write about it" – Henry explained.

"That sounds … how do you say it … _cool_" – Killian said with his typical accent, smiling.

"Yeah, it is _cool_" – he said, imitating Killian's accent – "Before I found my mom I used to suck at this kind of projects but now … now I really like it" – he said with a shy smile.

"I'm sure you'll get the best grade of the class" – Killian proudly said – "If you need my help with anything –"

"I do" – Henry immediately said – "I, hmm, I wanted to write about my dad …" – he added – "… and I was hoping you could help me"

"Sure" – Killian said – "I'll tell you whatever you need to know about Baelfire, I mean Neal" – he continued to say.

"No, I wasn't talking abou –"– Henry tried to say but Killian interrupted him.

"I was with him for a short period of time but I can tell you about our time together" – Killian explained – "When I met him he had your age, I think"

"I'm not talking about my father; about Neal" – Henry interrupted Killian from his memories – "I … I miss him and I will always love him but he was never really my dad … we never did father and son's stuff, you know?" – he tried to explained, noticing the confused look on Killian's face – "He never put me to sleep or made pancakes with me. He never helped me with my homework or read me stories before I fall asleep. He never taught me how to play dice or tie knots or read the stars. He never taught me how to sail a ship but you … you do all this stuff and more"

"Henry …" – Killian murmured, starting to realize what Henry was trying to say.

"I spend more time with you than I ever spent with him ..." – Henry continued to say – "We may not have the same blood running into our veins but that doesn't make you less my father than he was" – he added, looking at Killian's deep blue eyes – "So what I'm trying to say is that _I picked you _for my school project"

Killian was almost sure that he had forgotten how to breathe after hearing Henry's words, especially his last words – _I picked you_.

_I would pick you _– Emma's words of when he had been in the hospital started to echo in his mind – _I would pick you_. Maybe without even notice she was already predicting their future; the future where Emma trusted him the safety of her child; the future where Emma allowed him to be a father figure to Henry. He could almost complete her sentence _I would pick you_ to be Henry's father.

Gods, he could hear his own heart beating inside his chest. He was happy. His life was a total mess but somehow none of that mattered anymore.

He had never called Henry by _son_ but that didn't mean that he didn't consider him his child. He had already admitted it to Milah in the Jolly Roger but then, after hearing her cold words, the doubts starting to invade his mind:

_That boy will never be your son and do you want to know why? Because he doesn't sees you like a father, only like an obstacle who stood between Emma and Baelfire; the man who destroyed the chance of his parents being together; the man who destroyed his family_

She was wrong. Now he was one hundred per cent sure that she was wrong.

Killian opened his mouth to speak but then a new doubt appeared as he looked at Henry's brown eyes – Bae's eyes.

_What if he thinks that I'm trying to replace Baelfire? What if Emma thinks that I'm trying to erase all Henry's memories of Bae? What if she doesn't see me like I'm good enough to be his father? What if I disappoint him …?_

Henry's eyes brought him back to reality. The boy was waiting for his answer.

Killian wanted to hug him, ruffle his hair, _bloody hell_, he wanted to take Henry with him, find Emma and go home – their home. But he needed Henry to know that his intentions were pure; that he wasn't trying to replace his father.

"I don't want you to think that I'm trying to replace Bael-Neal" – he finally said.

"I know, I know … and I understand if you don't want me to –"– Henry tried to say but Killian didn't let him finish his sentence.

"I want to" – he immediately said, touching Henry's shoulder, making sure that there were no more doubts.

_I want you to call me that _– he said to himself.

Killian watched as a big smile started to appear on Henry's face. Taking him by surprise, Henry hugged him tight.

"Thank you, dad" – he murmured against Killian's chest.

_Dad_. It was the first time ever that someone called him that and he never thought that a small word could have such power over him. _Dad_. He was a dad. With or without prophecy he already had a son.

"No, thank _you_" – he said, releasing the air that he didn't know was trapped in his lungs as his hand cradled the back of Henry's head.

* * *

David watched from his desk Emma entering in the sheriff station the same way Killian did hours ago. Before he could say anything Emma did the exact same thing that Killian did. She passed by him and opened one of the doors of the sheriff station, trying to find any sign of Killian.

David approached her – "Emma" – he said, grabbing her arm gently. He looked at her daughter and immediately noticed the bags under Emma's red eyes, quickly realizing that she had been crying.

"Don't" – she said, trying to free herself from her father's hold.

"He's not here" – David said, releasing her.

They remained in silence for a few seconds.

"You lied to me" – Emma finally said – "When I asked you how you managed to come back you said that some fishermen found you and brought you back"

"Honey …" – David tried to explain.

"It's okay. I'm not blaming you" – she simply said – "The lie … It was Killian's idea, right?"

"He was just trying to protect you" – David said, trying to make Emma understand Killian's reasons.

"I know" – Emma sighed.

David looked at her with a surprised look. No yelling, no accusations, no narrow eyes.

"I already said things that I didn't mean" – she answered her father's thoughts.

"He was looking for you" – David said.

"He was?" – Emma asked, biting her lower lip.

"He would go till the end of the world for you, or time" – David said, remembering the words Killian had told him in the past.

"I told him to leave …" – Emma said with a trembling voice – "I told him horrible things, dad" – her voice broke on _dad_ and David immediately pulled her toward him, his arms wrapping around her as his hand caressed her blonde hair.

Emma wanted to blame the damn hormones as soon as she started to cry. She buried her head into her father's shoulder, feeling the sobs through her whole body. She was crying in her father's arms, letting the tears stain his shirt. Suddenly she found it hard to breath.

"Honey, breathe" – David gently said, leaning back so he could look at her – "You have to breath, Emma" – he said, taking a big breath himself and nodding at her to do the same.

She did what her father told her and after a few tries the sobs stopped.

"I'm okay" – she mumbled as her father caressed her cheek.

"I'll drive you home" – David said after a few seconds, searching for his car keys.

"No … I'm fine, dad. I can drive" – Emma said.

"Emma …" – her father tried to say.

"I'm fine" – she repeated – "You need to stay here … if Killian shows up call me, okay?" – she added.

David reluctantly nodded. He knew that arguing with Emma would be pointless.

"Thank you, dad" – she said before leaving the station.

* * *

After searching at the animal shelter and the woods, Killian decided to go to the docks. Storybrooke was such a small town but with so many places that Killian was starting to feel exhausted – not physically but mentally.

He cursed himself. He shouldn't have left. He shouldn't have kept information from her. It was wrong from the beginning.

_It was wrong from the beginning_ – Emma's words summarized his situation.

He looked at the horizon. The sunset would be in a few minutes and he hadn't found her yet.

There was no one at the docks but him, unaware that a few hours ago Emma had been in the same spot he was now, looking at the same boats he was now looking at.

The smell of the ocean woke up a memory in him:

"_I should've known you'd try to take me to the ocean" - Emma laughed, sloshing out into the frigid water._

_Killian remained in silence and waded in behind her, smiling at the sound of Emma's laugh. Gods, he loved that sound._

"_You know that we are fully clothed, right?" – she said, feeling the water covering her stomach._

"_I've missed you" – he softly said, swirling her to face him._

_It had been months since the last time they had been this close to each other. _

_After Emma become the Dark One she refused to approached to anyone, especially to the people she loved, even after Killian told her that he wasn't afraid of her, that he believed in her. It was in one of those moments, when Killian had tried to reach for her, that he said those three big words to her – I love you. _

_After hearing those words Emma paralyzed, allowing Killian to approach her without she even realize it, reducing the distance between them._

_I love you – he repeated, pushing a stray lock of hair behind her ear._

_I know – she mumbled, feeling the touch of his hand on her skin – I guess I always knew … You said it so many times in so many different ways and I … I never said it back until I decided to turn myself into this – she added and suddenly panic invaded her whole body. He was too close. She took a step back, preventing him from touching her – You should hate me now. I'm the Dark One._

_I could never hate you – he said, moving towards her, making Emma take another step back._

_You have to – she said with a trembling voice._

_Love … – he tried to say but Emma immediately disappeared in a dark smoke, leaving Killian alone with the word "Love" lost in the distance between them._

_A few months later, with Merlin's help they finally found a way to take out all of the darkness from Emma's heart, releasing her from the dagger … and now here they were, in the wide open seas, together._

"_I've missed you too" – she said, putting her arms around his neck and wrapping her legs around his torso._

"_Are you trying to escape from the water?" – he teased her, feeling one of her hands caressing his hair._

_Emma blew out a shaky laugh, moving her head quickly left and right. Killian remained in silence, looking at the beautiful woman in his arms. _

_Emma looked him straight in the eyes before she leaned her head to him so she could reach his lips. He reacted to the kiss immediately, opening his mouth so he could deepen the kiss. Both of Emma's hands were now on his hair and Killian groaned, grasping at her waist with hunger._

"_Are you sure?" – he whispered against her lips as he drew away from her, realizing what was about to happen. Emma nodded, smiling softly as she leaned in to kiss him but Killian spoke again – "We don't have to do this now, here … We can wait"_

"_We've waited long enough" – she mumbled against his lips – "I want this now, here, with you" – she said, emphasizing each one of the words – "I need you"_

_He crashed his lips against hers and she relaxed slightly against him, cupping his face and kissing him back fervently, desperate for more._

_His hand reached the bottom of her shirt and their lips parted as Emma lifted her arms, allowing him to take off her shirt. As soon as the shirt was off of her body she kissed his neck and started to unbutton his shirt, feeling his hot skin under her hands. Killian could feel Emma's lips placing kisses along his throat and he let his head fall back. He could feel her hands taking off his belt from his pants. He grabbed her hair and looked at her like she was not real, like this was just a dream and he would wake up at any minute. Emma was certain that it was possible to drown in his deep blue eyes – he was the most beautiful man she had ever seen and he was hers._

_She traced her fingertips low across his belly, enjoying the way his abdominal muscles reacted at her touch, and then she took off her own pants immediately feeling Killian's skin against her skin. She didn't know when he had taken off his pants but she was glad he did. _

_He crashed his lips against hers once again and felt Emma's nails digging into the back of his neck. He bit her lips lightly and all of sudden it was just too much._

_They made love in the wide open seas, far away from the world. An eternity later and Emma's legs were still wrapped around Killian's torso while he carried her out of the water. He laid her down on the soft sand. Emma opened her eyes and smiled as Killian's thumb found the little cleft in her chin. He smiled back rubbing his nose against hers in a tender motion. They made love in the moonlight._

Without even realizing, Killian found himself at the beach, searching for the exact same spot where once he had been happy; where he had been whole again.

The sun had almost disappeared in the ocean when he saw someone seated on the sand near the water – the person he was looking for.

After leaving the sheriff station Emma went home, hoping to find Killian there but the house was empty, so she opened the door that led to the beach. She didn't know how long she had been walking until she finally stopped. She could barely see their house from the spot she was seated.

Killian and she used to enjoy long walks on the beach; his finger intertwined; her head resting on his shoulder … and somehow they always ended up on that spot of the beach. The familiar beach rocks remembered her of the place where they had made love for the first time and so many times after.

She was hearing the sound of the waves crashing; feeling the water softly touching her barefoot feet when another sound mixed with the sound of the ocean caught her attention.

She slowly turned her head and got up from the sand, not believing in her own eyes.

Killian approached her in silence, not really knowing how she would react to the words he wanted to say to her. She had always been an open book to him but now he was afraid that the book was forever closed.

When he was just a few steps from her he opened his mouth to speak but before he could say anything Emma's body collided against Killian's. He could feel her hands grabbing his shirt and her body trembling as she tried to suppress the sobs.

"I'm sorry, I'm _so_ sorry" – she managed to say, with her head buried in his chest – "I'm sorry …"

After hearing her soft voice he finally encircled her waist, trying to reassure her that he was there; that he was not going anywhere.

"I'm the one who should apologize" – he murmured against her soft hair as a huge weight had been lifted from his chest.

"No … I shouldn't have said those things" – she said with a trembling voice, moving her head back just enough to be able to look up at him – "I didn't mean what I said to you"

"I know –" – Killian tried to say but Emma interrupted him.

"No, you don't" – she said, looking at his deep blue eyes – "I was angry and … and afraid and I needed to – I wanted to – blame you for making me feel that way" – she tried to explain before she took a deep pause, looking at her feet – "Because the truth is that … the thought of you wake up some day and realize that I'm just a disappointment, that I'm not what you expected me to be scares me" – her voice broke on _scares me._

"Hey …" – Killian immediately said, lifting her chin gently with his hand – "You don't have to worry about that, _ever_" – he said, losing himself inside her green eyes, realizing that Milah's presence was starting to create doubts in Emma's mind; she was thinking that she was just a rebound and she couldn't be more wrong – "I told you, even if I wanted to I couldn't stop loving you" – he added

And just like that Killian took her breath away once more and tears started to prick her eyes, moved by his words. She immediately cupped his face with her hands and kissed his lips passionately – a burning desire running through her whole body.

His tongue darted out to tease her lips and she gasped in pleasure. He smirked and deepened the kiss, his body relaxing completely.

"I _need_ you" – she murmured a few seconds later, gasping for air.

Killian heard the same words she had said to him a year ago on that same spot and was unable to control his body. He grabbed her thighs, allowing Emma to wrap her legs around his torso, lifting her onto him. His arm with the hook encircled her, tinging his hold around her as she kissed his lips with passion. His hands kept pulling her closer while they entered in the ocean.

There was so much more that he needed to tell her but he had missed her more than he ever thought it was possible. He needed her. He wanted to forget the world or the world to forget him and just be with his Swan.

He didn't want to think about Milah or the boat accident or the prophecy. He was tired of living in fear. He knew that he was going to have to tell Emma about everything but right now all he wanted to do was to touch her bare skin and feel her without regrets. All he wanted was for them to be just Emma and just Killian; no titles: no savior, no pirate, no princess, no hero.

The sun finally disappeared in the horizon allowing them to get lost, not in the wide open seas, but in each other.

* * *

**The next morning**

Killian woke up with the sound of seagulls and waves crashing on the sand. He slowly opened his eyes, quickly realizing that he was on the beach.

Emma was still asleep. Her head was buried in his chest and Killian stood in silence contemplating the way she breathed. She was just wearing his leather jacket and her panties. He was only wearing his black jeans.

Killian noticed that Emma's right hand was grabbing his necklaces and smiled. He started to caress her hair.

A few minutes later he felt Emma moving her head and placed a kiss on her forehead.

"Hi …" – she murmured, lifting her head a little bit so she could look at him.

"Hi" – he repeated tenderly.

She moved herself into a sitting position and Killian imitated her. She looked at the man in front of her and caressed his cheek. Killian put his hand over hers and she immediately noticed that there was something different in his arm. She grabbed it and finally realized what was missing – the tattoo.

"How?" – she softly asked.

"Regina" – Killian said.

"Killian, you didn't have to –"– Emma tried to say.

"Yes, I did" – Killian interrupted her – "I wanted to" – he added and Emma smiled – "We need to talk. I want to tell you what happened during the boat trip" – he said, pushing a stray lock of hair behind her ear.

Emma remained in silence as Killian started to tell her what had really happened during the boat trip. He told her about the storm, the mermaid/siren and finally about the Jolly Roger and Milah.

When he explained to her how Milah had managed to survive Rumpelstiltskin's attack and stay alive for almost three hundred years, thanks to the linking spell, Emma's eyes immediately widened with concern. Her hand immediately rested over his chest, trying to make sure that his heart was still beating. He assured her that the linking spell didn't control his actions and that he was fine, regardless Emma's expression didn't change. She was worried … how could she not be? He could die at any minute if something happened to Milah. No, there was to be a way to unlink them and she was not going to rest until she found it.

He continued to talk about the time they were in the Jolly Roger, explaining to her how they managed to escape with the help of the crewmen.

"I know" – she interrupted him. Killian looked at her confused – "Thomas told me what you've done"

"You talked with Thomas?" – he asked.

"Yes … I was searching for you at the docks and I saw a group of men, clearly not from town" – she started to explained – "I described you and I asked if anyone had seen you and Thomas said your name and explained to me that you saved them"

"I didn't save anyone love …" – Killian mumbled – "I was just trying to find a way back home"

"Stop being modest Killian" – Emma said – "You saved them … and Robin and my dad"

Killian rolled his eyes. He was still getting used of being seen as person who helped other people; he was still getting used of being a hero.

"There's something else you need to know" – Killian said after taking a deep breath – "I should have told you sooner" – he continued to say, touching the little cleft in her chin – "No more secrets"

Emma looked at him in a strange way. Kilian's words started to echo in her mind:

_There's something else you need to know_

_I should have told you sooner_

_No more secrets_

She was the one who should have been saying those words, not him.

Killian was about to tell her about the prophecy when Emma grabbed his hand and took it off of her face. That action made Killian think that maybe he shouldn't have brought it up the subject; that Emma had misunderstood the word _secrets_ and she was going to blame him for hiding more information from her … but then he realized that she was still holding his hand with not one but both of her hands, guiding his hand to somewhere.

He followed the movement of their hands and when he felt his hand touching her stomach he took his eyes from his hand and looked at her. Emma bit her lower lip when Killian's eyes met hers.

"No more secrets" – she softly said, repeating Killian's words.

He looked at her with a confused expression and unconsciously Emma tightened the grip, preventing him of letting go his hand from hers; preventing him from running away.

"I'm pregnant" – Emma finally said.

* * *

**I know, I know, cliffhanger … but she finally told him! So, am I forgiven for the amount of time it took me to update? **

**Sound of your thoughts in the box bellow! **

**I hope to see you next chapter!**


	15. blue blood

**Hello dear readers (:**

**I'm so sorry for the waiting! My muse decided to get into a coma (deep sleep, a state of extreme unresponsiveness …), anyway I'm back and the good news is that I already started to write the next chapter so the next update won't take this long, I promise!**

**There are some details that you also need to know. As I said in chapter 12 I'm trying to put some of the events that happened in the show in this story as well, however some things will be different. I already mentioned some details and there is another one that you need to know: **

**Rumpelstiltskin is still the Dark One (in this story Emma became the Dark One but after she released herself from the darkness and the dagger Rumple became the Dark One again … I know that this probably doesn't make any sense but I really need him to be the Dark One, I hope you don't mind)**

**Happy reading!**

* * *

_And then her heart changed, or at least she understood it; and the winter passed, and the sun shone upon her_ — J.R.R. Tolkien

* * *

The world slowed down around him and all that Killian could hear were Emma's words and his own heart beating.

_I'm pregnant_

Killian was almost sure that his heart had never beaten so loudly against his ribs before.

His good hand was still touching Emma's stomach. He could feel her warm skin burning and freezing him at the same time but instead of breaking the contact between Emma's stomach and his hand he caught himself pressing gently his hand on her belly, like she was his own source of light and he a man who had never seen light until that moment.

An image of a little girl running on the beach as the soft wind caressed her blonde hair invaded his mind. He could actually hear the sound of her laugh, the same sound of Emma's laugh.

Flashes of what never happened were now everything that he could see as he looked at Emma's stomach.

A little boy with the ocean in his eyes playing with the helm of a big ship; a little girl sound asleep in the arms of a blonde woman; a boy with the color of the sun in his hair grabbing seashells from the sand as a girl tried to reach a man with dark hair who was teaching her how to swim in the big sea.

The trembling of Emma's body made him take his eyes from her stomach and face her green eyes full of doubt and something else … hope. She closed her eyes instantly, avoiding eye-contact as soon as blue met green.

He was unable to erase the most pure smile that Emma's words had drawn on his face.

He wanted to turn all the flashes of possibility and hope that he had seen moments ago into reality; into memories. _How could he not want that?_

"You're with child…" – Killian softly said, unable to hide the emotion from his voice as a euphoric grin took over his face.

Emma's eyes were still closed as she tried to find the right words to say.

"I … we … I know we never talked about this, about having kids …" – she managed to say.

"Swan …" – Killian tried to say as if he was reading Emma's thoughts.

" … and I know that you probably think that it's too soon but I …" – Emma continued to say with a trembling voice.

"Swan …" – he whispered again, trying to make her open her eyes and look at him.

"I need to know how you feel about it … this … us …" – she added.

"Emma, look at me" – Killian said, his fingers placed under her chin and his thumb stroking her jaw, making her lift her head and look at him.

"I …" – she anxiously said, starting to panic.

Before she could say one more word Killian closed every inch of space between them, pressing his lips against hers. Emma fell on the soft sand and shock was replaced by a sensation of relief as she returned his passionate kiss.

Suddenly Killian pulled back.

"I'm sorry love" – he nervously said – "Are you alright?" – he asked with concern, quickly moving his body so he was no longer on top of her.

Emma couldn't help but smile at his reaction. He was already being overprotective. She could feel the tears starting to appear in her eyes.

She moved her body to a sitting position and before Killian could ask again if she was alright she threw her arms around his neck, catching him off guard and making him fall on the sand. She was now on top of him.

"I'm more than alright" – she said with a big smile on her face, looking at his worried eyes, trying to reassure him that everything was fine; that she and the baby were fine – "Are you happy?" – she whispered.

Killian gently touched Emma's face with his hand.

"No" – he finally spoke, seeing her deep green eyes changing from happiness to worry – "I'm more than happy" – he said, drawing a smile on Emma's face.

Killian couldn't keep his eyes from the woman in front of him. He always considered Emma a beautiful woman but now … now the woman in front of him looked more beautiful than ever. He couldn't keep his eyes away from her. Emma Swan never ceased to amaze him.

"Are you going to just stare at me?" – Emma said, smiling.

She had pictured in her head so many scenarios but nothing prepared her for the reality she was now living. It was so different from what she had imagined. It was perfect. He was overjoyed and deep down she knew that he would be overjoyed; beneath her deepest fears she knew that he would be _more than happy_.

"David is going to kill me" – Killian said as a wide smile appeared in his face.

"I'm an adult Killian and you are a thousand years older than my father" – she teased him – "I think the odds are in our favor"

Killian leaned his head so he could reach her lips and Emma could still feel his smile as his lips pressed delicately to hers. When he finally pulled back, her forehead remained against his. Killian's hand settled on her belly.

"How do you think Henry is going to react?" – she softly asked and as soon as Emma said Henry's name Killian smiled, remembering what the boy had told him – "What?" – Emma asked, noticing the shy smile on Killian's face.

"It's nothing" – Killian said, still smiling.

"Did I ever tell you about this super power that I –" – Emma's sentence was interrupted by Killian's kiss – "Tell me …" – she softly said, cupping his face as their foreheads touched.

"He called me dad" – he finally said.

Emma slowly leaned her head so she could look at him. _He called me dad. __**Dad**__. _Tears started to sting in her green eyes and before she knew it she started to cry. Before Killian could say something to comfort her, Emma spoke:

"You have no idea how much that means to me" – she said, crying tears of happiness.

"Love …" – Killian tried to say, cleaning her tears with his thumb.

"You might not be his biological father but that doesn't mean that he's not your son … that you're not his _dad_ …" – Emma explained. Her speech similar to Henry's – "Just because your blood doesn't run through his veins …"

Suddenly reality hit him.

Emma continued to talk but all he could hear was the sound of his own heart beating.

_I'm pregnant. _She was pregnant. Emma was pregnant.

_Just because your blood doesn't run through his veins …_

His world stopped.

No, no, no, no … This isn't happening. This isn't real. This can't be happening.

He had been so happy about the baby that he allowed himself to forget about all the mess that his life had become and as soon as he heard Emma saying that she was pregnant nothing else mattered. He had forgotten about everything because all that mattered was the beautiful woman in front of him but then this beautiful woman also woke him up and brought him back to reality.

… _your blood doesn't run through his veins …_

His blood didn't run through Henry's blood but the child that was now growing in Emma's stomach did.

Milah's words invaded his mind:

_Because the child's mother is the savior and the father has the sea running into his veins, the child's heart will have the power of immortality … You're the father, Killian. Your blood is made of sea …_

All he wanted to prevent from happening was already happening.

He had tried so hard to avoid the _p_ word; he had tried to hide the _p_ word from Emma and now another _p_ word was haunting him.

_The prophecy. The pregnancy._

His gut twisted at the thought of putting Emma and the baby in danger. He couldn't lose her. He needed her … and there was an actual physical pain every time he imagined his life without her – without them.

He had just found out about the baby and already knew that he would dry the ocean and move the stars in the sky if that meant that nothing bad happened to his child.

It was such a strange feeling and at the same time it was not strange at all.

"… you're already turning him into a pirate, you know that, right?" – Emma's smile fell from her face as soon as she looked at Killian. She had never seen a living man so pale in her entire life – "Killian?" – Emma shook him slightly but he didn't react – "You're kind of scaring me" – she tried to say like she was joking but her voice betrayed her.

_Was he having second thoughts about the baby? _

"Gods" – Killian whispered, meeting Emma's eyes but immediately avoiding eye contact – "What have I done …" – he said, getting up from the sand, hardly keeping his balance.

"Okay, now you're scaring me" – Emma said, rushing over to him – "What's wrong?" – she asked, trying to hide the nervousness of her voice.

"Emma …" – the way Killian said her name made Emma feel more desperate than ever. She was panicking – "I … there's something you need to know …"

"If this is about the baby …" – she started to say, already preparing herself for the worse.

"The baby is the reason Milah's here" – he interrupted her.

"What?" – Emma breathed – "I don't understand … what does our baby has to do with her?

_Our_ baby. Killian's heart skipped a bit at Emma's words.

"She wants to use the child to perform a spell …" – he began to say – "According to her the baby will have some special powers, powerful magic…"

_True love's magic?_ – Emma immediately thought – _No, she didn't even know if Killian was her true love; if she was his true love…_

"How does she even know that our child will be born with magic?" – Emma asked. _Could they really be true love? Does Milah know that they are true love? Does Killian know?_

Killian remained in silence looking at her and Emma quickly realized that he looked concerned like some curse was about to come and change their entire lives forever.

"Because of the prophecy …" – he finally said unable to hide the pain in his voice.

"Prophecy …" – Emma interrupted him. She was prepared to hear Killian say that they were true love and that that was the reason the baby would have magic not to hear the word prophecy. She shook her head, trying to erase the idea of Killian and her being true love – "There is no such thing as prophecies, Killian" – she said, focusing on what Killian was saying.

Killian raised his eyebrow and gave her a _says-the-daughter-of-snow-white-and-prince-charming_ look. No matter how many monsters she defeated or how many curses she broke, Emma would always be a skeptical person.

"Okay … so this _prophecy_" – she said, emphasizing the word _prophecy –_ "What does it say besides the fact that the baby will have magic? What kind of spell does she want to perform? Does she want to steal the baby's magic? Does she –"

"Emma" – Killian suddenly interrupted her, grabbing one of her arms so he could catch Emma's attention. Emma immediately knew that something bad was about to happen by the way Killian said her name – "You need to listen to me and prepare for what I am about to say" – he gently said.

Emma remained in silence waiting for him to continue.

"The prophecy says that one day the savior will have a child and that the child's father will have the sea running into his veins" – he started to say – "The child's heart will have the power to concede an eternal life to anyone capable of ripping its heart out of its chest and perform the _undying spell_ and contrary to most people …" – Killian took a deep breath before continuing to explain, he could feel his heart aching – "and contrary to most people as soon as the heart leaves its body the child will immediately die"

… _the child will immediately die_

… _child will immediately die_

… _will immediately die_

… _immediately die_

… _die_

Time and space stopped

_No, no, no, no_ – Emma could hear her own voice yelling in her mind – _This can't be happening. Not again._

She suffered from the moment she was born because she was destined to be the Savior; because she was supposed to break the curse and save everyone; because somehow she had the _power_ to bring back all the happy endings.

Then it was Henry's turn to suffer because he was the owner of the heart of the truest believer and Pan wanted to steal it; because his heart had the _power _to save his life.

After that it was Neal's turn to be in danger. Her little brother almost died so Zelena could perform her time travel spell because he was one of the ingredients with the _power_ that she needed for the spell to work … and now … _God_, now her child was the next one destined to suffer and die because of some magical _power_.

It was like her family was cursed.

"She knows …." – Emma murmured – "That's why she didn't kill me" – she added at the same time she remembered her encounter with Milah.

"What?" – Killian immediately asked, fear and rage invading his body – "What do you mean she didn't kill you? Did she threaten you? Did she hurt you?"

_Damn it_ – Emma cursed herself – _Why did she have to say that? There was no way he would let this pass. _

Suddenly she realized something. She could have killed him. If Milah hadn't blocked her spell she could have killed her and consequently Killian.

"Emma!" – he insisted.

"She made it pretty clear that she didn't want me around but she didn't do anything when I lost control of my magic, she didn't react … I didn't understand it at the time but now, now it makes sense" – Emma explained – "She didn't react because she needs me alive … because that's the only way for the prophecy to happen"

"She wants to kill you …" – Killian said – "She wants to kill you and she wants to kill the baby" – he added, hearing the rushing roar of blood that filled his head – "No … I'm not going to let that happen" – he said shaking his head – "This has to end"

Emma looked at Killian and froze.

"Don't even think about it" – she seriously said, realizing the double meaning of Killian's words – "Don't even think about it" – she repeated.

"She threatened _you_" – Killian tried to explained – "She wants to kill you" – he said, trying to hide the trembling in his voice

"She won't" – Emma stated – "She can't. She wants this baby to be born which means that she can't touch me. I'm safe" – she explained, she was now on a Savior's mode; she needed to be rational – "We have months to figure it out a way to protect this baby. She can't do anything to me until the baby is born and she can't do anything to the baby either" – she said, touching her stomach – "The only thing we have to worry about right now is to find a way to unlink you from her. That's the priority now"

"No, it's you" – Killian said the same words he had said to her years ago – "The priority is you, Emma_. Both of you_" – he added, touching Emma's stomach.

"Killian you have to let me do this!" – Emma exclaimed, grabbing Killian's arms – "I can't live like this, I can't … " – she tried to say as a sob wrecked her body – "I can't live with the fear that you can die at any second … that this can be the last time I talk to you … that this can be the last time I see your smile … that I hear your voice …"

"Swan …" – Killian tried to say.

"No Killian, no!" – Emma insisted – "I can't live like this and I'm not going to stop until I find a way to break the linking spell, so don't ask me to stop because I'm not going to stop!" – she said, letting her head rest on his chest – "I can't lose you" – she whispered.

Killian caressed her hair gently, trying to calm her down. He never thought that someone could care about him so much; that someone could be so worry about his safety. He didn't deserve her but somehow Emma wanted him in her life. She loved him and he loved her.

"How many times do I have to tell you, Swan?" – Killian softly said – "I'm a survivor"

* * *

"Mom, I'm home!" – Henry said as soon as he entered in the house.

"Living room!" – he heard his mother's voice.

He took off his coat and let his school bag fall on the floor before heading to the living room. He immediately saw Emma seated on the couch with legs crossed, reading some papers.

"Hi, kid!" – Emma said, taking her eyes from the papers and smiling at her son.

"Hi" – he said, sitting next to her.

"So, how was school?" – Emma asked.

"Is everything alright?" – Henry asked, not answering Emma's question. Noticing the confused look on Emma's face Henry added – "I've spent the night at Regina's and I didn't even see you yesterday … Did something happen?"

"Sorry kid, there was just some things that Killian and I had to solve" – Emma said – "He's in the kitchen" – she answered the question Henry was about to ask – "We have to tell you something"

"Bad news or good news?" – Henry asked.

_Both_ – Emma thought.

"I think –" – Emma started to say but Killian's voice interrupted her.

"Yes Regina I know that I ate the rest of the pie" – he said, entering in the living room. Emma and Henry couldn't help but smile at the way Killian kept rolling his eyes and almost took out his cellphone from his ear (the new cellphone Emma bought him) – "Can you not use your Evil Queen voice, please?" – he said emphasizing the word _evil_ – "Yes 8pm" – Killian said before ending the call.

Killian made his way to the couch where Emma and Henry were and sat next to them. Emma and Killian exchanged a look.

"So …" – Henry said. He was seated between them and he had no idea why his parents were acting so strange – "Bad news or good news?"

Emma looked at Killian again. He nodded at her and she took a deep breath. _C'mon Emma, just tell him._

"Seriously guys what is going on?" – Henry insisted.

"How would you feel if I told you that …" – Emma started to say and then paused. Killian's arm was resting on the back of the coach and she felt his hand caressing her shoulder, giving her the confidence that she needed to continue – "that we're going to have a baby?"

"What?" – Henry said as his eyes widened – "You're pregnant?"

"Yeah" – Emma softly said, biting her lower lip – "Are you … are you happy?"

"Of course I'm happy mom!" – Henry said with a big smile – "This is awesome!"

Emma could feel the tears starting to appear in her eyes. The damn hormones were starting to show up again. Seeing Henry's reaction warmed Emma's heart.

"Are you ready to be a big brother, lad?" – Killian said, making Henry turn his attention to him.

"I'm more than ready" – he said, grinning from ear to ear.

"I know you are" – Killian said, ruffling his hair – "Besides, there is no way your mother and I can handle this without you"

_You couldn't handle it. Perhaps you're the one who couldn't handle it_ – Emma remembered their words before their first kiss.

"We're going to tell the rest of the family tonight at dinner …" – she said – "but we wanted to tell you first"

"So, I'm going to have a little brother or a little sister?" – Henry enthusiastically asked.

Emma looked at Killian remembering what had happened hours ago.

_They had come home to take a quick shower and eat something when Killian mentioned that they needed to go to see Whale and dragged her till the hospital, despite Emma's protests._

"_Killian we have to schedule an appointment first" – Emma said as they entered in the hospital._

"_Why do we have to schedule an appointment if we are already here?" – Killian asked._

"_Because that's how things work in this world" – Emma tried to explain – "This is not an emergency we can't expect for the doctor to just –"– she saw Whale drinking coffee with two nurses and didn't finished her sentence._

"_You were saying …" – Killian said, raising his eyebrow. She rolled her eyes and was ready to protest when Killian spoke again – "Swan, I remember your mother coming quite frequently to the hospital when she was pregnant with your brother"_

"_God, you sound like Regina" – Emma said quickly realizing what she had just said._

"_She knows?" – Killian asked._

"_And my mom" – Emma said, biting her lower lip – "I found out that I was pregnant a day before your boat trip with David and Robin" – she quickly said – "Are you mad?"_

"_I'm not mad, Swan" – Killian said, looking right into her eyes. After a few seconds of silence he asked – "Why didn't you tell me sooner?"_

"_I was going to but then I … I was afraid of your reaction…" – she started to explain. Killian opened his mouth to speak but Emma continued to talk – "… and then the accident happened and all I could think about was that I had lost you and that I didn't even have the courage to tell you about the baby" – she added – "… and when you came back you were acting so strange that I … I thought …"_

"_It's okay, love, I understand" – Killian said, caressing her hair – "And you don't ever have to worry about my reaction. You can tell me anything. We're a team, remember?"_

_Before Emma could say something in response someone approached them._

"_What's my favorite couple doing here?" – Whale asked._

_Favorite couple? – Emma said to herself before looking at Killian. The pirate was smirking and she forced herself not to roll her eyes._

_Emma had just explained to Whale what his favorite couple was doing there when he immediately dragged them to one of the exam rooms._

_The room was large and well lit and Emma couldn't stop thinking how different this situation was from when she had been pregnant with Henry._

_Whale wanted to confirm if she was indeed pregnant so he suggested that Emma did a urine test. She went to a smaller room while Killian waited in the exam room. As soon as the door was closed he started pacing the room._

_Emma told him that she had already done it a pregnancy test, regardless he couldn't help but being nervous._

_Gods, he didn't know anything about this modern technology that he was looking at. Could these machines really allow him to see his child? Would the test Emma was doing really confirm that she was with child? What if the answer was no? What if Emma was not pregnant? Would they try again despite the danger of the prophecy? What if the answer was yes? Could he really do this? Could he really be a father?_

_He was so lost in his own thoughts that he didn't even notice Emma entering in the room. It was only when she sat on the edge of the exam table and the paper underneath her crinkled that he noticed the concerned look on her face._

"_Are you okay?" – Emma asked._

"_Aye" – he said, forcing a smile but Emma gave him the liar detector look – "I don't know … I'm just…"_

"_Killian Jones … you're nervous" – she said, not able to hide her smile as Killian scratched the back of his ear – "It's okay, I'm nervous too" – Emma added._

_Suddenly a sharp knock on the door caught their attention. Doctor Whale walked in, peering between a file folder and the anxious couple._

"_So, are you two ready to see the little one?" – he said, after a few seconds of silence._

"_Does that mean …" – Killian murmured with his eyes widened._

"_Yes, Captain, it's official" – Whale said – "You two are going to have a baby"_

_Almost unconsciously Killian sighed in relief and Emma touched her stomach. _

_Whale asked Emma to lie back on the table and lift her shirt so he could rub the gel on her stomach. He started to ask her questions about the symptoms she was having. Killian watched every move Whale made with curiosity and anxiety. His eyes widened when Whale told them that they're going to try to see the baby and figure it out how many weeks pregnant Emma was._

"_Hook, please have a seat" – Whale suddenly said – "You have the look" – he emphasized the word "look", implying that it was for the best if they didn't have to scrap him up off the floor as soon as the baby appeared in the monitor._

_Instead of seating, Killian approached the exam table and grabbed Emma's hand gently. A few moments later they were both staring at the small screen in front of them as a grey picture with the outline of a baby on it appeared on the screen. _

_Emma gasped as soon as she saw the little one kicking around inside of her. Killian increased the hold on Emma's hand, releasing the air he didn't know he was holding in his lungs._

"_There we are …" – Doctor Whale said, continuing to move the wand over Emma's belly – "The baby is still small and according to the information that you gave me I'd say that you're eleven weeks pregnant" – Whale explained – "1 1/2 inches long from head to bottom. You won't feel the baby's acrobatics for another month or two"_

_Emma couldn't believe in her own eyes. The baby was still so small and even if she couldn't feel it yet it looked so human. She lifted her head a bit to look at the man beside her and her heart skipped a bit when she saw the look on Killian's face. His shinning eyes didn't leave the monitor and he had a broad grin on his face._

"_Do you know if …" – Emma softly said, catching Doctor Whale's attention._

"_I might be able to tell you the sex next month if you want to" – Whale gently said, reading Emma's mind._

"_Are you sure you didn't feel that, love?" – Killian asked in awe as the baby moved its tiny arms and legs._

_Emma just shook her head no. Killian couldn't take his eyes from the monitor as Whale explained to them the baby's anatomy._

_They watched the baby for a few more minutes before the doctor printed off multiples copies of the sonogram images for them, after that they scheduled the next appointment._

"So you don't know if it's a boy or a girl …" – Henry said, after hearing about the appointment.

"Nope" – Emma said – "Unless you can see something in this picture that the doctor couldn't" – she added, giving him one of the baby's pictures.

"Wow" – Henry said, looking at the picture with his big brown eyes – "I can't believe I was once like this" – he added without taking his eyes from the picture. Emma noticed that Killian was also looking at the picture as if it was the first time he was looking at it – "Grandpa and grandma are going to freak out"

"Speaking of … I think we have a dinner to prepare" – Emma said, starting to get up from the couch, catching Killian's attention.

"You're not going anywhere, Swan" – he suddenly said – "Henry and I can handle things, right my boy?"

"Of course" – Henry said, getting up from the couch so he could follow Killian to the kitchen. Emma was ready to protest when Henry spoke again – "Dad and I can handle things"

_Dad_. It was the first time she heard Henry calling Killian like that. She never thought that a small word could warm her heart the way it did and in that moment she knew that she wanted to spend the rest of her life with the father of her children. She was more than happy.

* * *

Emma wasn't sure how they made it through dinner. Henry and Killian couldn't hide the grin on their faces but thankfully David was distracted talking with Robin about work. Mary Margaret was focused on Neal and didn't seem to notice the way Regina was looking at Emma and Killian. The former Evil Queen was more than aware that something was happening but every time she tried to bring it up the subject Roland interrupted her with some question or Henry started to talk about school.

They were almost finishing the dessert when David spoke:

"Honey, you didn't touch your glass" – he said, noticing that Emma's glass was still full of wine – "I bought your favorite"

Emma and Killian exchanged a look. Regina and Mary Margaret did the same. David noticed the strange behavior of Emma and turned his attention to Killian, giving him the _what-did-you-do_ look. The grin on Killian's face immediately disappeared.

"There's something we need to tell you" – Emma said, grabbing Killian's hand.

The image of Killian asking for his blessing invaded David's mind. He took a deep breath preparing himself for the big announcement, not noticing the big smile on Mary Margaret's face.

"I … I'm pregnant" – Emma said after a few seconds of silence.

Mary Margaret immediately jumped off the chair and ran towards Emma and Killian.

"Finally!" – Regina said, throwing her arms in the air.

"You knew?" – both David and Robin asked, making Regina roll her eyes.

Mary Margaret's reaction caught Emma by surprise. Her mother already knew about the pregnancy but by the way she was holding Killian it was like she didn't know anything about it. She reacted even more enthusiastically than she had reacted when she found out the first time. When Mary Margaret finally released Killian from the crushing hug the pirate found himself face to face with David. The prince was looking at him with a serious look. Killian opened his mouth and was about to speak when David placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Congratulations!" – David said smiling.

"For a second I thought you were going to kill me" – Killian joked as David gave him a brotherly hug.

"Too many witnesses" – David whispered in Killian's ear before approaching his daughter.

Emma was still wrapped in Mary Margaret's crushing hug when she met David's eyes. She slowly released herself from her mother's embrace and as soon as she said the word _dad_, she found herself in her father's arms.

She immediately felt the familiar hand cradling the back of her head, caressing her hair gently. She didn't know how long she stood in David's arms all she knew was that she didn't need to say anything; it was like David and her didn't need words to communicate and Emma caught herself thinking that maybe she was a daddy's girl after all.

After Robin and Regina congratulated the happy couple the people in the room started to throw questions at Killian and Emma. Regina immediately asked if she had already scheduled an appointment. Mary Margaret and David started to discuss if the baby was going to be a girl or a boy; David even suggested that they could have been expecting twins, since he once had a twin brother. Emma showed them the multiples baby's pictures and repeated what Whale had told her and Killian during the appointment.

The whole family couldn't stop smiling and making plans for the future and Emma realized how different the situation was from the time she had been pregnant with Henry; she realized that this was what meant to have a family. Unfortunately, the family part was not the only difference from her first pregnancy.

"There's something else you need to know" – Emma said, exchanging a look with Killian before sitting again on her chair.

The rest of the family did the same, except Roland who was now seated on the couch watching TV.

Regina grabbed Robin's hand preparing herself to hear the rest of the story, more specifically to hear again about the prophecy.

The serious tone of Killian's voice made all the smiles disappeared from the room. Killian continued to explain how Milah managed to survive and how the boat accident was her doing. After a deep breath he started to explain why Milah decided to appear just now; he revealed the prophecy.

"Milah?" – Henry interrupted him, realizing who this Milah person really was – "My grandmother?"

Killian just nodded.

_This family tree is so messed up_ – Henry thought – _And as usual the other side of the family had to be_ _made of villains, first Rumpelstiltskin, then Peter Pan and Zelena and now Milah._

A death silence invaded the room as soon as Killian ended the tale. Emma could see in her parents' faces not only the memories of the time when they had to put her in a magic wardrobe and send her away but also the time when Zelena kidnapped Neal.

"She's not going to win" – Henry's voice broke the silence – "She can't win"

"Henry …" – Emma softly said.

"Mom, how many curses did we defeat? How many villains?" – Henry said – "She's not going to win" – he repeated.

"Henry is right" – Mary Margaret said, trying to hide the trembling in her voice with a smile – "We're going to find a way like we always do"

"Of course we are" – David said, looking at his daughter – "No one is going to touch this baby"

"It's not that simple!" – Emma said, raising her voice – "Killian's life is linked to hers!"

"Emma we've already talked about this" – Killian said, caressing Emma's hand.

"I did a research on some of my spell books and unfortunately I didn't find anything about unlinking spells" – Regina said before Emma could protest – "So as far as we know the only way to break the spell is …" – it was obvious to everyone at the table what Regina was trying to say so she didn't have to finish her sentence.

"Can't you perform some sort of protective spell to block the linking spell?" – Robin asked, trying to figure it out a way to help his friend.

"I'm afraid that the linking spell is stronger than any kind of protective spell ever invented" – Regina explained – "That's why there isn't any way to undo the spell, at least not according to any book that I read"

"I don't care what those books say" – Emma spoke – "I'm going to break this spell"

"No you won't, dearie" – a familiar voice immediately invaded the room. Everyone turned their heads and saw Rumpelstiltskin appearing from a purple smoke, his eyes immediately meeting Killian's – "I believe someone forgot to invite me for this family reunion, especially when we're dealing with such a delicate subject"

Emma quickly told Henry to go check on Roland and when the boy opened his mouth to protest Emma gave him a look that didn't leave room for discussion. Henry rose from his chair and sat on the couch next to Roland.

"Get out of my house, crocodile" – Killian said through his tightly clenched teeth.

"You kept information from me" – the Dark One said with a serious voice – "I specifically asked you what was the motive that made my ex-wife decide to appear just now and you said you didn't know"

"What do you want, Gold?" – Emma asked before Killian could protest.

"My ex-wife is in town trying to perform some ritual so she can become immortal and destroy me and the key ingredient for that to happen lies inside of you, Miss Swan" – he started to say – "I think I have the right to know what kind of plan are you –"

"How did you know about the prophecy?" – Emma interrupted him.

"Did you know this all time?" – Regina immediately asked, facing Rumpelstiltskin.

The Dark One took out of his pocket a scarf and approached the table.

"Do you know what this is?" – he asked, looking at Emma.

"A dirty scarf with blue ink" – Emma simply said.

"This is your blood, Miss Swan" – Rumpelstiltskin corrected her. Everyone at the table tensed, looking at Mr. Gold with a confuse look.

"What do you mean is her blood?" – Killian asked, trying to hide the nervousness in his voice.

"Does _blood made of sea_ ring a bell to you?" – Rumpelstiltskin asked, turning his attention to Killian – "When we performed the spell that showed us that the men in this room were alive" – he said, looking at Regina and Emma as he pointed at David, Robin and Killian – "I felt a different kind of power invading the room as soon as Emma cut her hand and her blood started to flow so I cleaned some of her blood from the table with this scarf. When I got home and analyzed the scarf everything seemed normal but then the blood started to change its color" – he explained.

"I did some research about the relation between blood and magic and I didn't find anything about blue blood until my wife appeared and saw the books that I was reading and mentioned that the pirate was doing some research on his own about prophecies related to the sea and involving blood. I started to put all the pieces of the puzzle together (Milah's appearance, Emma's pregnancy, the pirate's research) and I eventually found out about the prophecy" – he said looking right into Emma's eyes – "If she succeeds she will become more powerful than the three of us together. I'm sure you already feel the extra power running into your veins"

The memory of her encounter with Milah and how she lost control of her magic invaded Emma's mind.

"I don't understand …" – Emma said confused – "I saw the color of my blood when I cut my hand and it was red … how can it be blue now?"

"Well, when I said that this was your blood" – Rumpelstiltskin said, showing the scarf – "I didn't exactly mean your blood. It's a mix of your blood and the baby's blood, more specifically the baby's power" – he explained – "It can only be detected minutes later. I believe that when the baby is born its blood will be blue and not red"

"Why did you say that she will become more powerful than the three of us?" – Regina asked.

"Because she will be immortal" – the Dark One said.

"Aren't you immortal?" – she asked again.

"There's a difference between immortality and eternity" – Rumpelstiltskin started to explain – "You can have an eternal life but that doesn't mean that you're immortal; that there isn't a way to kill you"

"The dagger can kill you" – Robin stated.

"Precisely" – Rumpelstiltskin said –"The _undying spell_ will allow her to be immortal which means that whatever happens she can never die and there's no way to defeat something or someone that can't be killed" – he added.

_The child's heart will have the power of immortality; the power to save and cure; the power to concede an eternal life to anyone capable of ripping its heart out of its chest and perform the undying spell _– Milah's words invaded Killian's mind. He was almost one hundred per cent sure that she had mentioned _eternal life_, not _immortal life_.

"Fortunately we don't have to worry about that because that woman is not going to perform any kind of _undying spell_" – David said, trying to remain optimistic.

"What did the books that you read say about the prophecy?" – Killian asked, remembering his talk with the Dark One's wife – "Belle told me that prophecies can be misunderstood; that sometimes a prophecy can have different versions with different information"

"That's correct" – Rumpelstiltskin said.

Killian could still hear Milah's voice in his head.

_Contrary to most people, as soon as the heart leaves its body the child will immediately die, like a wave that dies on the sand every time it tries to abandon the sea_

"You said that the undying spell will allow her to be _immortal_ but when she revealed the prophecy to me she said that the child's heart will have the power to concede an _eternal _life" – he said, emphasizing the words _immortal _and _eternal _life– "Do you think that she doesn't know about the immortality part or –"

"Milah is smart" – Rumpelstiltskin interrupted him – "She had more than enough time to analyze this prophecy in detail, besides there's a reason for the spell to be called the _undying spell_. My guess is that she probably didn't tell you about the immortality part so we would think that we could stand a chance against her once the prophecy was fulfilled … at least that's what I would do if I was her. It's always more fun to let people think that they can win when you already know that they can't"

Killian remained in silence processing Rumpelstiltskin's words and as much as he hated to admit it the Dark One was probably right.

"What do you know about the child's heart?" – Killian continued to ask.

"Besides the obvious?" – Rumpelstiltskin said.

"She said that as soon as the heart leaves its body the baby will die" – Killian explained.

"Interesting…" – Rumpelstiltskin said, caressing his chin. None of his sources said anything about that little detail.

"Interesting?" – David said, raising his voice more than he intended to.

"I didn't find anything about that but it makes sense" – the Dark One said, ignoring the prince's words – "The heart usually is the source of power of the most people who are born with magic. I thought that Milah was just going to take away the baby's magic but I guess this explains the sacrifice part that I've read about" – he explained – "My theory is that the child will be bond to this magic … stripping away the baby from its source of magic is like stripping away the baby from its life, which means that the connection between the baby and the magic will be very strong, not only because the source of its magic is the same as the source of its life but also because the magic that we're talking about is not an ordinary magic, it's rare…" – he continued to explain.

"It changes the most basic laws of magic. Everything is finite, that's why magic can't bring back the dead. Which begins must end; which is born must die. This magic will allow people to live not only forever but also to be immortal… It must always be a balance and I believe that the baby's sacrifice was the way that Nature found to assure that balance: a mortal life for an immortal life, I suppose" – Rumpelstiltskin said.

After his explanation Rumpelstiltskin noticed the pale faces of the people seated at the table. He realized that they were all waiting for him to tell them that the information that the pirate had shared was not real but instead of that he did not only confirmed it but also said that there was absolutely no way to solve this problem.

He always knew that Milah was an ambitious woman, that's why she had left him in the first place but he never thought that she would be capable of killing an innocent person; a baby.

Milah's craving for power could only mean that she was willing to do anything at all to destroy him and suddenly Killian's words about Belle being in danger invaded his mind.

"Now that we're all in the same boat there's just one more important detail – a not negotiable detail" – he said, breaking the silence in the room – "My wife can't know about this"

"Don't you think that she should know…." – Mary Margaret tried to say before Rumpelstiltskin interrupted her.

"As I said this is not negotiable" – he repeated, looking directly at Killian – "I look forward for the next family reunion" – he said before disappearing in a purple smoke.

* * *

**So, it was about time for the prophecy and the pregnancy to be revealed, don't you think? It only took me 15 chapters to end all your suffering … but don't get to comfortable I have BIG plans for this story and don't forget Belle's words: **_**Prophecies are a complicated thing.**_

**Love you guys! (:**


	16. playing pirates

**Hello dear readers (:**

**I'm back! I'm so sorry for the waiting! I know it's been centuries since my last update but I really couldn't finish this chapter and I'm still not one hundred percent happy with it but I decided to post it anyway. I hope you like!**

**Happy reading!**

* * *

_It's not the pain I'm afraid of; I know about the pain. What I'm afraid of is the end of this small, sweet dream __―_ Stephen King

* * *

**Two weeks later**

"Red is definitely your color" – Regina said as Emma tried one of the dresses that the Queen had picked.

An hour had passed since they entered in the store and Emma was starting to get tired and bored. Regina, on the other hand got more excited every time she found a new dress for Emma to try. She had already picked her wedding dress and was now focused on Emma's maid of honor dress.

"I don't think any color is my color anymore. I'm starting to show" – Emma said, looking at her reflection in the mirror – "And my belly will be the triple of its size"

"No one will notice your big belly because all eyes will be on the bride, more specifically, me" – Regina said trying to cheer up her friend.

She knew that Emma was worried about the pregnancy. The revelation of the baby's magic was something that Emma was still trying to process … and there was also Milah and her obsession with the baby.

The Savior tried to avoid the subject but Regina knew that Emma was doing some research on her own and that she hadn't found the answers that she was looking for.

Since they found out about the linking spell, Emma spent her free time trying to find a way to unlink Killian from Milah. Unfortunately she didn't find any unlinking spell so Killian's life was still at risk, which complicated things since they couldn't kill Milah, as a last resource, if she tried to harm the baby or Emma.

The Queen knew that Killian would gladly give his life away if that meant that Emma and the baby were safe but she didn't mention it to Emma because that would only make the Savior even more anxious than she already was.

"How is your research going?" – she asked, trying to get some information – "Did you find anything yet?"

"No, nothing" – Emma said after taking a deep breath – "It's like someone decided to rip all the pages about unlinking spells"

"I'm afraid it's worse" – Regina said, making Emma look at her as she tried to get rid of the dress – "No one did ever create that kind of spell, that's why linking spells are unbreakable"

"There has to be a way … some kind of loophole" – Emma said, refusing to believe that Killian's life would be forever linked to Milah's.

"Didn't Belle get suspicious? You spend more time at the library than at the sheriff station" – Regina asked.

"I don't usually stay at the library" – Emma said – "I prefer to read the books at home … besides I don't want any more troubles with Gold"

"I still don't understand why is he keeping this from Belle" – Regina started to say, running her finger through her dark hair – "She would be more alert if she knew about Milah"

"That's why I have to find a way to unlink Killian from her" – Emma immediately said – "I can't risk Gold to-"

"… kill Milah" – Regina completed her sentence.

"It would be the safest option for him" – Emma said, feeling her stomach ache – "And he hates Killian"

"But Belle doesn't" – Regina quickly said, trying to comfort Emma – "Killian and her are practically besties" – she explained – "If Gold kills Milah to protect Belle he will lose her anyway. She will hate him forever"

"I can't risk it" – Emma stated.

* * *

Killian was at the docks making sure that the men had everything they needed for the journey. The crew had decided to stay a few days in town after their hearts returned to their chests. Apparently Smee wasn't the only pirate in town who had fell in love with frozen yogurt.

Killian had helped them restore some of the old boats that didn't belong to anyone and were doomed to stay forever out of the water so they could sail in better and bigger boats than the lifeboats.

"How do you plan to travel to another realm without a portal?" – Killian asked as he grabbed one of the boxes full of provisions and carried it to one of the boats.

"Who said that we don't have a portal?" – Thomas replied. Killian raised one of his eyebrows, waiting for him to explain. Tomas took of his pocket two magic beans – "I stole them before we left the ship. The Captain had three but we used one of them to travel to your world"

_Your world – _Thomas words echoed in Killian's mind.

Thomas was right; this was his world now, this or any world with Emma in it. He never thought he could ever feel at home away from the sea; away from his ship but the truth was that now he couldn't imagine his life away from Storybrooke.

He loved his life. He loved living with Emma and Henry. He loved the lunches at Granny's with the all family. He loved spending time with Belle at the library. He loved his driving lessons with David. He loved cooking for the entire family. He loved babysitting Neal and Roland. He loved helping Henry with his homework. He loved watching Emma when she thinks no one is looking, noticing the small details that no one sees but him. He loved his family.

"Those aren't easy to come by" – he said, clearing his throat trying to disguise the smile on his lips.

"I'm well aware" – Thomas said smiling.

"Are you going to sell the other?" – Killian asked with curiosity.

"I have a debt to pay" – Thomas said extending his arm to Killian and putting one of the beans on his hand. Before Killian could react the crewman spoke again – "You saved our lives and got us new boats, according to the pirate code this is the least I can do, besides you never know when you might need to use a magic bean" – he added.

"I'm not planning to go anywhere, mate" – Killian said, remembering once again that Storybrooke was his home – "But thank you"

A few hours later the men disappeared in the ocean. Killian stood at the docks, remembering the times he used to sail; the people he met during his trips; the places he saw; the food he tasted; the storms he fought; his time at the royal navy … Liam.

_I hope you're proud of me, brother _– Killian said to himself.

"Thinking about me?" – a voice startled him.

Killian immediately grabbed the gun that, like all the deputies and Emma, he used to carry with him.

"Leave" – he said through gritted teeth, turning his body to face her.

Milah ignored the gun that Killian was pointing at her and smiled.

"I was right, you're still a pirate after all" – she said.

"Everybody knows about your twisted plan so I suggest you leave Milah, _now_" – Killian said stiffly.

Milah seemed to be taken aback for a moment but she quickly disguised it with a neutral face.

Killian immediately realized that she wasn't counting that he would tell her plan to Rumpelstiltskin. That would definitely destroy the element of surprise and could also put at risk her plan.

"You told _him_?" – she asked in disbelief. Killian clenched his jaw – "How could you do that? That man destroyed our lives and now … now you two are friends?" – she exclaimed.

"We're not friends" – Killian immediately said.

"This is about his wife, isn't it?" – Milah asked, narrowing her eyes – "You warned him so he could protect her from me" – she stated, putting all the pieces together.

"This is about me trying to stop your madness" – Killian said, raising his voice – "You threatened people that I care about. You threatened my family!"

"You have to stop see me as the enemy! We're in this together, Killian!" – Milah exclaimed.

"We're not together!" – Killian said, grabbing her arms so he could put some reason in her – "I don't even know you anymore"

"But I know you …" – Milah softly said trying to touch his face.

Killian took a step back avoiding her touch.

"No you don't" – he said shaking his head – "because if you did you would know that I would never agree to this sick plan of yours"

Milah remained in silence for a few seconds, looking at Killian through narrowed eyes.

"You know, it's kind of ironic because this illusion that you have about this little life of yours is what will make you want to fulfill the prophecy …" – Milah said with a mischievous smile – "You may not see it now but I know that when the time comes you will be the one to want to crush the child's heart" – she explained before disappearing in a dark smoke.

Killian stood in silence looking at the place where Milah had been with a million questions in his mind. He could feel his hand trembling at the thought of crushing his child's heart. Fortunately the sound of his phone ringing erased Milah's voice from his mind.

"David" – Killian immediately said, trying to disguise the nervous of his voice.

"Killian, it's an emergency" – David said, making Killian's heart beat faster than ever. _Milah _– "Robin needs my help on some wedding arrangements; I hope he doesn't drag me to wherever he wants to go to pick the color of the towels" – the prince explained and Killian released the air he didn't know it was trapped in his lungs – "Anyway, Snow has some businesses to attend at school and Granny called saying that she has an appointment at the hospital so she can't take care of Neal … oh, and the Merry Men are with the flu so Roland can't stay with them" – Killian tried to speak but David continued to talk – "As you know Regina and Emma are shopping so…"

"You want me to take care of the lads" – Killian stated.

"Yeah, that was the idea" – David said.

"Alright, so where –"

"Robin is going to meet me at the loft with Roland in about five minutes so you better run, old man" – David interrupted Killian.

Killian rolled his eyes and bit his tongue, trying to ignore David's teasing.

"I'm on my way, _Charming_" – he said, emphasizing the word _charming._

* * *

As soon as Killian entered in the loft Roland ran towards him and jumped into his arms.

"Can we play pirates today, uncle Killian?" – Roland asked with his big brown eyes shining.

"_Play pirates_?" – Robin asked confused, before Killian could answer the little boy.

"Uncle Killian and I stea-"

"No pirate games today, lad" – Killian said before Roland could finish his sentence and reveal to the family that he had taught a four years old boy how to steal a boat.

Robin raised one of his eyebrows but Killian ignored him.

"You have food in the fridge" – David said from the kitchen – "If he gets too grumpy give him a cup of milk and some cookies but not the full packet" – he explained, putting his son on the couch, then he kissed his forehead – "Have fun" – he added as he passed by Killian and opened the front door.

Killian was almost sure that he heard Robin asking David if he knew what _playing pirates_ meant as he closed the door.

The pirate put Roland next to Neal and looked at the two boys sat on the couch.

"So what are we going to do today, lads?" – he asked smiling.

A few minutes later Killian was down on the ground attempting to imitate the two boys' sounds of cars at full speed. Each one of them had their own vehicles and was driving it under the dinner table and over the couch. Killian hit his head a few times on the dining table, making the boys laugh every time he cursed himself and said _bloody hell_.

After the car race it was painting time. Killian helped the boys choose the colors and prevented Neal from eating one of the markers. In the end the boys' hands and faces had more color than the paper sheets, so Killian decided that it was bath's time, otherwise Regina and Mary Margaret would kill him slowly as soon as they saw the ink on the boys' skin.

He was so focused on the two boys in the bathtub that he didn't even notice Emma leaning on the door frame of the bathroom. A small smile graced her lips as she watched Killian and the boys.

"Maybe we should teach Neal how to sail a boat too, uncle Killian" – Roland said as Killian washed his hair.

"You think so?" – Killian asked. Neal looked at the two of them for a second and then continued to play with the plastic boats that were floating on the water.

"Yeah, so he can play pirates with us" – Roland said, playing with a plastic submarine.

"I think you're right, lad" – Killian said – "We're going to drive David nuts" – he added.

"Can we make Will walk the plank?" – Roland asked, turning his attention to Killian again.

"Does he know how to swim?" – Killian said, trying not to laugh at Roland's idea.

"I don't know …" – Roland said after thinking about it for a few seconds.

"Maybe we should ask him first, you know … good form and all" – Killian suggested.

Roland was about to ask another question when he noticed Emma's presence.

"Aunt Emma!" – the boy exclaimed, making Killian turn his body so he could look at Emma.

He immediately noticed a sparkle in her eyes that made his heart beat a little harder against his ribcage.

"It's bad form to eavesdrop, Swan" – he said smiling.

"I didn't want to interrupt you and your plans to throw Will overboard" – Emma said.

"It was Roland's idea, not mine" – Killian said, winking at the boy.

"And he only has this kind of ideas because you taught him how to steal boats and –"

"Correction: I taught him how to sail a boat" – Killian interrupted Emma – "Wait, how do you know that the boy and I use to steal boats?"

"I might have seen you with Roland and Henry at the docks, once or twice, pretending to be the owners of all the boats of Storybrooke" – Emma said.

"That's bad form, Swan" – Killian said, pretending to be shocked.

"No" – Emma said approaching to the bathtub – "This is bad form" – she said before splashing water at Killian.

Neal and Roland started to laugh while Emma bit her lower lip trying not to laugh at Killian's shocked face.

Killian ran his hand through his damp hair and then looked at the woman next to him.

"Will is not going to be the only one to walk the plank, love" – he whispered with a hoarse voice, sending shivers down Emma's body – "Lads, I think a certain princess needs a bath too" – he said, turning his attention to the two boys.

As soon as Killian said those words Roland yelled _attack! _and started to throw water at Emma. Neal did the same wetting not only Emma but also Killian.

* * *

Regina and Robin were in the living room. They were sat on the couch reading some of Regina's spell books.

"Do you know what playing pirate means?" – Robin asked, closing the book he was reading.

"It means that Roland is spending too much time with Killian" – Regina said without taking her eyes from the book.

"It's okay to admit that you like him. Everybody knows that you like him" – Robin said making Regina narrow her eyes – "Operation _The three musketeers_ kind of revealed the shocking truth that the two of you can be friends"

"It was a shock for me too" – she said after rolling her eyes. Robin gave her the _just-admit-it _look – "Okay, fine, I like him from time to time when he's not against my plans and ideas" – Regina admitted suddenly closing the book, making Robin smile – "And he's good with Henry and Roland (obviously) and with you" – she added – "But no more boat trips while crazy Megan is still around"

"You're worried about him, aren't you?" – Robin asked softly.

"I'm worried that he's going to do something stupid" – Regina said, running her fingers through her hair – "You saw the way he reacted when Emma was gone. Do you really think that he's not going to sacrifice himself if that means that Emma and the child live?"

"Hey, we're going to find a way to unlink him from _Milah_" – Robin said, holding Regina's hands.

"There isn't any unlinking spell, Robin" – Regina said, trying to hide the trembling in her voice – "We're looking for something that doesn't exist" – she exclaimed as she pointed at the books that were scattered on the couch.

"That doesn't mean that there isn't any other spell or another way to defeat her" – Robin insisted – "We're going to find a way, together. That woman is not going to succeed. I saw you defeating Zelena even when you didn't think you could, why would this time be different?"

Regina couldn't take her eyes from the beautiful man in front of her. Even when she didn't think he could have more faith in her he proved her wrong. Her heart started to beat faster. She still couldn't believe that someone could see her as a hero and especially as Regina, _just_ Regina.

Sometimes she had to tell herself that she wasn't dreaming; that this was real; that Robin was real. He had given her so much: faith, happiness, love, family.

"I could marry you, right here and right now, do you know that?" – she said, cupping his face in her hands.

"No, no, no" – Robin said, rubbing his nose against hers in tender motion – "I've spent the afternoon searching for that towels that you asked for. I even dragged David with me for back up and he didn't stop complaining during the entire time that we were in the store"

"Did you find the green towels?" – Regina enthusiastically asked, smiling.

"Yes, the ones with the little red flowers" – Robin replied.

"Great!" – she said, giving him a quick kiss – "Now we have to pick the flowers and the music and –"

"Arrrrrggggghhhhh!" – Roland suddenly screamed just the way Killian had taught him, appearing in the living room.

"Shouldn't you be sleeping, little man?" – Robin asked as Roland climbed to the couch – "It's way past your bed time"

"Uncle Killian says that pirates don't have bed time" – Roland said smiling.

Regina and Robin looked at each other. Regina rolled her eyes and Robin shook his head.

_Roland was spending too much time with Killian._

* * *

Emma watched Killian as he scratched another day off the calendar – the baby's calendar.

After knowing that Emma was pregnant, Killian had bought a calendar so he could count the days until the baby was born.

She loved that Killian knew that she was exactly thirteen weeks and four days pregnant. She couldn't help but smile at that little detail. He was always so supportive.

_He really wanted this_ – she thought touching her stomach – _He really wanted her; them._

She found herself moving forward until she was directly behind him, wrapping her arms around his shoulders, her head coming to rest in the crook of his neck.

"I had the strangest feeling I was being watched" – Killian teased – "Shouldn't you be in bed, Swan?"

"I thought pirates didn't have bed time" – she said as he turned his body to face her.

"Well, sometimes they do" – Killian said – "You should be in bed" – he insisted.

"And I was but I got tired of waiting for you" – Emma said, making Killian smile.

Before she could react, Killian put her arms around her and carried her bride style to their bedroom. He put Emma in their bed and then slid into bed as well.

Killian lifted his good arm in invitation and Emma immediately shifted closer to him. Her head was now rested against his shoulder as his arm came to rest at her waist. She grabbed his hand with hers and pulled it up higher until they both rested against the side of her abdomen.

Killian stood in silence, contemplating Emma's peaceful sleep and remembering his secret talk with David when he returned to the loft:

"_Next time I stay with the boys and you go with Robin" – David said, sitting on the couch. Killian was in front of him with a serious look on his face – "What's wrong?" – he asked._

_Killian hesitated for a second before answering:_

"_I need to talk to you" – he said, sitting next to his friend. David waited for Killian to continue – "You have to promise that this conversation doesn't leave this room" – he added quietly._

"_Killian –"– David tried to protest before Killian interrupted him._

"_You know I wouldn't ask you this if it wasn't important" – Killian said, looking at the kitchen, making sure that Emma wasn't listening – "I don't like to keep secrets from Emma but I don't have a choice. You have to promise me that you won't tell her anything"_

_David nodded and Killian took a deep breath before continuing._

"_You're Emma's father. You would do anything to protect her right?" – Killian asked, already knowing the answer._

"_Of course" – David immediately said._

"_Milah is not going to give up from her plan which means that Emma and the baby will never be safe unless we find a way to stop her" – Killian explained._

"_And we will. Emma and Regina are going to find a way to unlink you from her and then her threats will end" – David said – "She will no longer have the upper hand"_

"_David, there is no unlinking spell" – Killian said quietly – "I know that Emma has been searching for a way to unlink me from Milah but you heard Regina, there isn't any spell capable of doing that"_

"_What are you trying to say?" – David asked, fearing Killian's answer. _

"_I want you to promise me that you will do whatever its necessary to stop Milah from harming Emma and the baby" – Killian said, looking at David's eyes._

_Suddenly, David realized the double meaning of Killian's words._

"_Killian …" – he tried to say._

"_It's the only way to stop her" – Killian interrupted him._

"_Emma would never forgive me" – David said, trying to make Killian see that there had to be another way._

"_And I will never forgive you if you don't do what I'm asking you to" – Killian said, running his fingers through his hair, trying to sound calm – "You have to promise me, David. Promise me that you will kill me if Milah tries to hurt them – if she tries to kill them" – he insisted – "I can't live a life without her, David … I can't live that life, I can't …"_

_David stood in silence looking at his friend, seeing the despair in Killian's eyes. He knew that Killian would gladly give his life to save Emma. He knew that Killian would gladly give his life to save his children and David could relate with that. He would gladly give his life to save Mary Margaret; to save Emma; to save Neal._

_After a few seconds David nodded and Killian knew that the prince had agreed._

Killian's fingers were drawing patterns across Emma's belly while he dreamed about a world with no villains.

* * *

**I started a prequel that explains Operation **_**The Three Musketeers **_**that Robin talked about. The story will be different from the show, since in my story, after Emma becomes the Dark One she will be gone a little longer and our heroes will have to figure it out a way to reach her, anyway, it will be a small fanfic showing the development of Killian's friendship with Regina and Robin.**

**I hope you liked this chapter and don't forget to check **_**The Three Musketeers**_**, it will be released soon! Love you guys! (:**

**PS: I changed the cover of this story!**


	17. the plank

**I wish you a very merry Christmas! **

**Enjoy this chapter, dear readers! (:**

* * *

_There's always going to be bad stuff out there. But here's the amazing thing — light trumps darkness, every time. You stick a candle into the dark, but you can't stick the dark into the light_ _―_ Jodi Picoult

* * *

Emma Swan was never the type of woman who stood hours looking at her reflection in the mirror, seeing the way her clothes fit, until today.

The first time she was pregnant she never had the chance to see the changes on her body the way she was supposed to. There wasn't any mirror large enough in her cell to allow her to see her whole body change and even if it was she would probably refuse to look at it.

According to Killian's calendar she was fifteen weeks and four days pregnant. She had already started to show and some of her clothes didn't fit her anymore so she decided to follow her mother's advice and try another type of clothes – dresses. Yes, Emma Swan was replacing her jeans for dresses … at least for now.

She was wearing a light blue dress that didn't cover her knees and as much as she hated to admit it her mother was right – she felt comfortable wearing the dress and she looked beautiful. If Think was there she would say that she was actually glowing.

Emma was looking into the mirror when her eyes caught her pillow on the bed. She looked around the room, making sure that she was alone and picked the pillow from the bed. She put it underneath her dress and looked again into the mirror. Her eyes widened. She looked like she was nine months pregnant; it was so surreal.

She couldn't stop looking at her reflection in the mirror. She knew that her belly wasn't that size yet but it would be and she couldn't wait to make that vision real. It was like she was looking at her future – a happy one.

On one of the appointments Killian and she decided that they didn't want to know if the baby was a boy or a girl (actually she was the one who suggested that and Killian immediately agreed). It would be a surprise but now, looking at her reflection she kind of regretted that decision because now she really wanted to know if the baby was a boy or a girl.

She didn't tell anyone, but sometimes in her dreams she sees a little girl running on the beach. The girl is always smiling. Her hair is dark brown like Killian's and her eyes look exactly like Killian's eyes. Other times the dream changes and instead of a girl she sees a little boy looking at her with his big blue eyes. The boy's dark hair is always messed and he always carries with him a toy – a small ship with a pirate flag.

She always wakes up with a smile on her face. She can't quite explain it why but in her dreams the baby always looks like Killian and she loves it. She never sees the boy or the girl with blonde hair and green eyes. She doesn't know why but she loves the idea of their baby looking like Killian. It feels so natural, so right …

She put her hand over her fake belly and smiled as her hand caressed it gently.

_Yap. He or she would be just like Killian._

"That was fast" – a voice startled her.

She took her eyes from her stomach and looked at the mirror immediately seeing Killian in the mirror as well. He was leaning against the door frame, smirking.

"I was just …" – Emma tried to say at the same time she pulled the pillow out from under her dress. She didn't even notice that Killian was now standing behind her.

"Put it back, please?" – Killian softly asked, touching Emma's hand gently. She was still holding the pillow.

"Killian …" – Emma tried to protest.

"Emma…" – Killian murmured in her ear in an irresistible way.

Emma put the pillow back under her dress. Killian lifted her right hand and placed it on her belly. His arms came around her and rest on top of hers, lacing their fingers together.

She looked at their hands and then at Killian's reflection. His eyes were fixed on their hands on her stomach.

"I know what we should name him" – Emma said, turning around so she could look at his deep blue eyes.

"Oh, do you?" – Killian said smiling as he raised his eyebrows – "It seems to me that the father should have some say in his so –" – suddenly he stopped talking and looked right into Emma's eyes – "_Him_? I thought…" – he asked confused before Emma interrupted him.

"No, no, no, no" – Emma quickly said, realizing what Killian was thinking – "I don't know if it's a boy … We agreed that it would be a surprise so …" – she added smiling.

"So …" – Killian said, pushing a strand of her hair behind her ear.

Emma looked at Killian's eyes. He was waiting for her to continue. She had been thinking about this for quite some time. She couldn't imagine a better name for their son.

"Liam … I think we should call him Liam" – she finally said, feeling her heart racing, fearing his reaction. He stood in silence for a few seconds.

"You want to name our son after my brother?" – Killian said, breaking the silence.

"Yeah ... but if you don't want to –" – Emma tried to say before Killian interrupted her with a kiss. Her body seemed to almost sigh with relief at Killian's reaction. His arms wrapped around her waist, pulling her even closer. An eternity later, she felt him release her very slowly – "I take that as a yes" – she said smiling.

"Thank you, love" – Killian softly said – "I … It's perfect" – he added and Emma could see his eyes shining.

"It's decided then" – Emma said, caressing his cheek – "I think it's a beautiful name. Just don't tell my dad about it. I'm almost sure that he will try to convince us to name him David" – Emma added – "What?" – she suddenly asked. Killian was uncharacteristically quiet.

"I was just thinking …" – Killian said, scratching behind his ear – "It may not be a boy"

Emma Swan raised her eyebrows.

"Killian Jones … You want it to be a girl" – she said, not even trying to hide the smile on her face.

"I want her _or him_ to be strong and healthy and full of light like you" – Killian said, covering Emma's stomach with his hand.

"And you" – Emma immediately said, putting her hand over his – "I think Liam" – Killian couldn't help but smile – "or _she_" – she added, seeing Killian's reaction – "is going to look just like you" – she said, remembering her dreams.

"She will definitely look like you, Swan" – Killian said.

"See, you really want a girl!" – Emma stated, smiling.

"I just think we should be prepare for any possibility" – Killian explained.

Emma gave him the _liar-detector_ look.

"Okay, fine but I don't like to call the baby _it_ so from now on I will refer to the baby as a_ he_" – she said.

"It makes sense since you already picked _our son's name_" – Killian teased her. Emma opened her mouth to protest but Killian was faster – "You know what? I just got a brilliant idea!" – he started to say – "From now on I will refer to the baby as a _she_, just in case…"

"Uh huh …" – Emma said, biting her lower lip, trying to disguise her smile –"You just can't admit it, can you, babe?"

Before Killian could reply Emma wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him.

* * *

David and Robin were at the sheriff station doing some paperwork when Will came in.

"Is the Sheriff here?" – he immediately asked – "I need to talk to her"

Robin looked at him with a suspicious look. He seemed nervous and that was an unusual look on Will.

"Why?" – Robin asked, approaching Will – "What did you do?"

"You really think that if I had done something I would be here?" – Will said, trying not to roll his eyes.

"Then why are you _here_, Will?" – Robin asked using his serious voice.

"I already told you! I need to talk with the Sheriff!" – Will said, passing by Robin.

He sat on Robin's chair trying to calm his nerves.

Robin was about to protest when David spoke:

"You can talk with us" – David said, as he walked towards Robin. The men were in front of Robin's desk looking at the thief – "I'm sure Robin and I can help you"

Will looked at David and Robin for a long time, trying to decide if he should tell them the reason why he was there. Both men had their arms crossed over their chests and were waiting for him to talk.

Will took a deep breath and then he spoke:

"I want to be a deputy" – he stated.

David tried not to laugh after hearing Will's words while Robin remained with a serious expression on his face.

"You're joking, right?" – Robin asked, narrowing his eyes.

"Do I look like I'm joking to you?" – Will said, leaning on the desk. David and Robin remained in silence looking at him – "Look, I need a job. A _real_ job" – he added, rising from the chair.

"You do know what being a deputy means, right?" – Robin asked, not waiting for Will's answer – "Courage, commitment, _responsibility_" – he stated, emphasizing the last word.

"Oh, c'mon mate!" – Will suddenly said, sitting on the desk, making some papers and pens fall on the ground. Robin opened his mouth to protest but Will was so focused on his speech that he didn't even noticed the way Robin was looking at him – "You know I'm a good fighter and an excellent tracker and a people person! This job is perfect for me! Besides, it will allow me to grow as a human being and be a better person" – Will explained – "Just give me a chance to prove that I can do it. I won't fail you"

Robin shook his head.

"How long did you practice this speech?"

"This one just took me ten minutes. The one that I made for the Sheriff took me at least three hours" – Will simply said.

David and Robin shared a look, trying to decide what to do.

"Look, Emma will not be able to be here at full time and I'm pretty sure that neither will Hook" – Will tried to explained – "You will definitely need an extra help so why not me?"

"He's right. Emma will need rest" – David said, analyzing what Will had said – "Besides, she's also working on a way to unlink Killian so she already spends more time at home than here. We could really use an extra hand, especially now that Milah is around"

Robin could think about a million reasons why Will was the worse option for the job but at the same time he could also be a great help for them. He trusted Will and he knew that if Will really decides to take this job serious he could be a great help for them. There was a new villain in town and they needed all the help they could get.

"So, that means that I'm an employed man?" – Will enthusiastically asked after hearing David's words – "And who is this Milah person?" – he added.

"First we need to discuss this with Emma and Killian" – David said, ignoring Will's question about Milah.

"You better be one hundred per cent sure that you want this, Will!" – Robin added – "This job requires commitment and responsibility"

"Yes Robin, I heard you the first time" – Will said, unable to hide the smile from his face. He was an employed man … well, almost.

* * *

The whole family was at Regina's house. She had made her special lasagna so she decided to invite the Charmings for dinner. She thought that reuniting the family would be good to relax a little and forget about Milah for a few hours.

"So, did something relevant happen while I was gone?" – Emma asked after eating some of the food on her plate.

Robin froze, fork raised midway between plate and mouth. David drank some of his wine before clearing his throat.

"Actually there's something you need to know" – he said, looking at Emma.

Robin and David had been trying to find the right moment to tell Emma and Killian about Will but the moment never came.

All the people on the table remained in silence waiting for David to continue. They were afraid of his answering. Milah's name started to echo in their minds. After weeks of peace they all feared that she had returned and had started to cause any more trouble.

"It's about Will" – David finally said and almost unconsciously everyone sigh with relief.

"Of course" – Emma said, shaking her head – "What did he do this time?" – she asked, preparing herself for another story involving Will Scarlet.

"He didn't do anything" – David quickly said.

"But you did" – Robin murmured before eating some of his lasagna.

"What? I didn't say _yes_" – David protested, looking directly at Robin.

"Oh, please, you practically did" – Robin retorted – "Didn't you see his face? In his mind you said _yes_"

"But I didn't" – David said, raising his fork – "I said that first we needed to discuss it with Emma and Killian" – he tried to explain. Robin's words were now stuck in his mind – "Do you really think that he thinks that I said yes?" – David added.

"Trust me, he's already making plans" – Robin said eating some of his food.

"Guys!" – Emma spoke, trying to end the discussion, making both men look at her – "What is going on?"

"Will wants a job" – David said.

Emma narrowed her eyes, trying to understand David's words.

"At the sheriff's station … with us" – he continued to say – "He wants to be a deputy and according to Robin I may have said yes"

Emma raised her eyebrows in disbelief. Mary Margaret and Henry tried not to laugh.

"I didn't see that coming" – Regina murmured.

"So let me get this straight" – Emma started to say – "You're telling me that the guy that spends more time in the station's cell than in his own bed wants to become a deputy?"

"The guy wants to change, honey" – David said, after hearing his daughter – "Besides, this way we can keep him out of trouble, right?" – he added, trying to sound confident.

Emma rolled her eyes, trying to ignore the annoying optimism of her father and turned her attention to Robin.

"What do you think about this, Robin?" – Emma asked, trying to decide what to do.

"Honestly I don't know" – Robin said – "I've known Will for a very long time and it seemed that he really wanted the job but his lack of responsibility worries me" – he explained – "But David has a point. Perhaps this job it's what he needs to start acting like an adult. He can be a great help. He's a good fighter and a good tracker"

Emma's mind was full of doubts. They really needed an extra help but at same time she didn't know if turning Will into a deputy would be a blessing or a curse. The guy was always getting into trouble and now he wanted to be a deputy? She shook her head. Her gut was telling her that maybe she should give Will a chance but at the same time she had to be rational. She was the Sheriff. There was no room for mistakes. The protection of the town was her responsibility. She was more than the Sheriff, she was also the Savior.

She looked at Killian who had been in silence during the whole discussion. He seemed calm.

"What about you?" – she softly asked, touching his hand gently – "What do you think?"

"You're the Sheriff, love" – Killian said, caressing her hand with his thumb.

"Yeah but we are a team …" – Emma insisted, making Killian smile.

He remained in silence for a few seconds drawing circles on her hand with his thumb.

"If a former pirate can be a deputy so can he, don't you think?" – he smoothly said – "We should give him a chance, love"

"We could use the extra protection" – David insisted.

"Okay, fine" – Emma agreed –"Robin, please call Will and ask him to be at the sheriff's station tomorrow morning so I can talk to him about the job" – she said.

Robin nodded and rose from his seat so he could search for his phone and call Will. He was already anticipating an enthusiastic reaction from the thief.

Killian looked at the other side of the table and saw Roland and Henry. He remembered the time he had to babysit Roland and Neal and suddenly an idea invaded his mind. Roland looked at him like he had heard his thoughts.

Killian leaned his head so he could murmur something into Emma's ear.

"Swan, don't forget to ask Will if he knows how to swim" – he said.

Roland was about to open his mouth when Killian held a finger to his lips. The boy smiled and copied him. Emma noticed the exchange of looks between Killian and Roland and realized the double meaning of her boyfriend's words.

* * *

**The next morning**

When Will entered in the sheriff's station Emma was the only one in there. She was sitting at her desk. Will noticed that she was reading a book. He also noticed that she was chewing a pen and had some papers scattered on her desk. It seemed that she was doing some research.

He tried to close the door without making any sound but before he could take another step forward Emma spoke:

"You're early" – she said, closing the book and rising from her chair.

Will took a deep breath and approached her, trying to look calm.

"Good morning Sheriff" – Will said with his typical accent – "I must say that that dress looks good on you, boss" – he added.

Emma rolled her eyes.

_You're lucky Killian isn't here_ – she said to herself, remembering the time Killian got jealous of his past self and his typical jokes about the flying monkey.

She was wearing a yellow floral dress – another gift from her mother. The dress was simple and comfortable.

"So, _Will_, David and Robin told me that you want to work here with us" – she said, facing Will – "I'd like to know why" – she crossed her arms over her chest. Will opened his mouth to speak but Emma interrupted him – "And I'd like to know the truth and not a three hours speech" – she added, remembering Robin's words about the speech Will had prepared for her.

The thief looked nervous. Emma turned on her liar detector and waited for Will's answer.

After a few seconds of silence he spoke:

"I want this job because I want to be taken serious" – Will said and Emma immediately knew that he was telling the truth – "I want to do something useful. I want to help people just like you and the rest of your family do" – he explained – "I know that this probably sounds strange to you –"

"Not really" – Emma said before Will started to babble – "You want people to see you different. You want to change things and become a better person" – she continued to say – "My family is the kind that believes that everyone deserves a chance to prove themselves so if you really want to be part of this team the job is yours"

As soon as Emma said those words Will let himself fall on the nearest chair.

"Bloody hell" – he murmured still trying to process Emma's words – "I did it … I got the job … I'm an employed man"

"Well, not exactly" – Emma said, trying not to laugh as Will continued to talk to himself like he had won the lottery – "There's still a thing that you need to do before you can be part of the team"

"A thing?" – Will asked confused – "Like a test?"

"You can call it that" – Emma said as she grabbed her jacket and her car's keys – "C'mon everybody is waiting for us"

Will followed her. Emma opened the car's door but before she could enter Will spoke again:

"I know what this is. You want to see what I'm willing to do to get the job, right? A ritual to be part of the team, I like it!" – Will enthusiastically said – "Just so you know if you guys are planning to make me run naked I have no problem with it"

"Yeah, that won't be happening, _ever_" – Emma said, getting in the car, trying to erase Will's words from her mind. She couldn't wait to get to the docks.

* * *

"Did you really had to bring the camera with you?" – Robin said as he helped Regina getting aboard.

They were at the docks waiting for Will and Emma. Killian, David and Roland were already on the boat, checking the plank.

They didn't know who the owner of the boat was. According to Killian, no one ever used the boat except him and the boys. It was probably just an old and abandoned boat created by Regina's curse.

"Of course!" – Regina said taking him a quick photo, making Robin blink his eyes because of the flash – "Did you really think I would let this opportunity pass?"

Before Robin could answer Regina approached Roland and took him a photo as he put the pirate flag on the mast with Killian's help.

"I still think he's spending too much time with you, pirate" – she said after she took the picture.

"If I didn't know you any better I'd say you're jealous" – Killian teased her as he put Roland on the ground. Regina was about to protest when David spoke:

"They're here" – he said, seeing Emma and Will making their way to the boat.

Will looked confused as Emma told him to get aboard but then he saw the wood sword on Roland's hand and the plank.

_Bloody hell_ – he said to himself, realizing why the boy had asked him if he knew how to swim a few days ago.

Emma approached Killian. He immediately wrapped his good arm around her as she leaned her head to his shoulder.

"Can't I just run naked through the woods?" – Will suddenly asked, throwing his arms to the air – "I'm not a fan of water"

"Oh, please, not again" – Emma mumbled as she hid her face on Killian's shoulder. She had to listen Will talking about the naked run during their ride till the docks and she had to fight every impulse in her body to not shove him out of the car.

"Again?!" – Killian immediately asked, turning his head so he could look at Emma.

"Relax, Killian, I didn't see him naked" – Emma said before he could punch Will in the face.

"Let's just do this" – David said, pointing at the plank – "There's a lot of paperwork to do at the station"

Before Will could react Roland was behind him pushing him to the plank. He reluctantly walked forward but then he looked at the water and stopped.

"Keep moving, Will!" – Roland shouted behind him, rising his fake sword in his direction.

Will remained frozen.

"C'mon, Will, it's just a small jump" – Robin insisted – "It's perfectly safe"

The boat was still docked. They weren't even in the high sea. It was impossible for anyone to drown there, Will's head probably wouldn't even get wet.

"It doesn't look safe to me, mate" – Will retorted.

"Jump, Will!" – Roland said, making the plank tremble – "You said you knew how to swim!"

"And I know how to swim!" – Will shouted back – "I just don't like water, I told you that, little devil!" – he added

"If you don't jump my _mom_ will turn you into a fish!" – the boy said, trying to make Will jump.

The sound of something falling to the ground caught Robin, David, Killian and Emma's attention. They immediately noticed Regina's camera on the boat floor.

Roland kept threatening Will as the thief continued to refuse to jump.

Time and space stopped for Regina. She looked like she was frozen.

_Mom_. She kept hearing that word in her mind.

_Roland had just called her mom. _She was sure that she had forgotten how to breathe after hearing Roland's words. He had always called her Regina but now, now he had called her _mom_. She could hear her own heart beating inside her chest.

She loved that boy like she loved Henry; like he was her son.

Roland never called her _mom_, he knew that she wasn't his mother and she was okay with it but after hearing him calling her mom she felt like he really saw her not just as a friend or his father's girlfriend; he saw her like a mom.

"It feels good doesn't it?" – a voice interrupted her thoughts. She took her eyes from Roland and saw Killian beside her.

Killian knew exactly what Regina was feeling. He would never forget the first time Henry called him _dad_; he would never forget how he felt after hearing that word.

Robin wrapped her arms around her and kissed her cheek and she released the air she didn't know was trapped in her lungs.

The sound of something falling to the water and a giggle caught their attention.

"Did you take a picture, mom?" – Roland enthusiastically asked, running towards them.

Regina's heart skipped a bit at Roland's words again.

"Sorry sweetie, I let the camera fall" – Regina finally said.

"That's okay, I think Will is still on the water" – Roland said, picking the camera from the floor and giving it to Regina

"Well, let's take him a picture then!" – Regina said, drawing a smile on Roland's face.

Robin watched as Regina and Roland ran till the bow of the boat

"Maybe we can ask Will to jump again" – he heard Roland saying and smiled, thinking how perfect his family was.

* * *

Belle was at the library organizing some books when she heard the sound of the front door opening. She looked between the shelves and saw a woman entering in the library.

The woman looked around the room like she was searching for someone. She didn't seem familiar. In fact, Belle was almost sure that she had never seen the woman before.

The woman kept looking around the room and that was when Belle realized that the woman hadn't seen her. She was so focused on the woman that she didn't even realize that she was behind the shelves, making impossible for anyone to see her.

The woman was about to leave when Belle stepped out of the books.

"I'm sorry, I was just organizing some books" – she said, making the woman turn her body to her – "Do you need my help with anything? – she asked, putting the books she was carrying on the counter – "If you're looking for a book I can help you find it"

"I thought there was no one at the library" – the woman said as she made her way to the counter.

"Next time just call for me" – Belle said extending her hand to her – "I'm Belle and I'm always here, well almost, sometimes I'm at the shop" – she added, holding the woman's hand.

"Shop?" – the woman asked confused.

"Gold's shop … it's my husband's shop" – Belle explained.

"Oh, so you're Mrs. Gold" – the woman shyly said.

"You can just call me Belle" – Belle said smiling – "I'm sorry to ask but you don't look familiar … are you new in town or …"

"Zelena's curse brought me to this town" – the woman stated – "I have a small house in the forest and I usually spend my time there, that's probably why you never saw me around" – she explained – "But today I decided that it was about time to check the library of this town and see if there was any book for me to read"

"What kind of book do you want to read?" – Belle immediately asked. She always gets excited when someone shows interest in books.

"I don't know … I was hoping you could help me" – the woman said as Belle approached one of the shelves.

"What about _The old man and the sea_?" – Belle said, reaching for the book.

"Did you read it?" – the woman asked with curiosity.

"Just four times" – Belle said smiling – "I think you will like it" – she added as she gave her the book.

"Alright, then I'll read it" – she said as she looked at the cover of the book – "Thank you for your help, Belle"

"You're welcome" – Belle said as the woman made her way to the door – "Can you just tell me your name so I can register it in the system?" – she added before the woman reached the door.

The woman remained in silence for a few seconds before turning her body to Belle.

"Caroline. My name is Caroline" – Milah lied.

Once she was out of the library she translocated herself to her ship. She threw the book against one of the captain's quarter's wall and looked at the hand that had touched Belle's skin. She wanted to kill her but she knew that it wasn't the right time, not yet.

She had spied Belle for a few weeks. She had taken a great risk today when she decided to visit the library but she needed to get close to Belle if she wanted her plan to work. She would have to learn her routine and only then she could strike.

Her death wasn't going to be in an empty library, it was going to be in the open; in the main street so everyone could see Rumpelstiltskin's wife die in pain and covered with blood.

"I just have to wait for the right moment" – and Milah was a very patient woman.

* * *

**You better prepare your heart for the next chapters, no more fluff!**


	18. hit and run

**Important information: **

**In this story Killian never was in the Underworld and he never was the Dark One. As I said in chapter 14 when our heroes found Merlin he successfully removed the darkness from Emma.**

**Enjoy!**

* * *

_We dreamed how we were perfect, and we were _— Sylvia Plath

* * *

**Two months later**

"Are you sure that Regina will be able to keep her occupied?" – Killian asked as he carried one of the many boxes that were in David's truck to the house.

"Relax … you should be more worried about Will being alone at the Sheriff's station" – Robin said, following Killian.

"I want it to be a surprise" – Killian stated, entering in the room that soon would be the baby's nursery.

Killian put the box he was carrying on the ground and looked around the room, remembering the events of the night before, when Emma and he returned home, after the dinner with the Charmings.

_Emma's back hit the front door as soon as she closed it. Before she realized it Killian's lips took her by surprise. Her fingers immediately got lost into his unruly hair. His good hand caressed her cheek and tilted her head slightly to deepen their kiss._

_After a few seconds Emma backed away a bit, disconnecting their lips so she could control her breathing. Her hands left his hair and gripped the lapels of his jacket. Killian buried his head in the nick above her shoulder, where her breastbone met her cleavage, and Emma could feel his lips kissing her skin, sending shivers down her body._

"_Killian" – she panted as one of her hands sneaked down into his shirt to grasp the necklaces that he always wears._

_He used his hook to hoist one of her legs around his waist and Emma immediately braced her other leg around his waist as well._

"_Just so you know …" – Emma gasped as her legs tightened the hold they had around his waist – "I'm loving the surprise" – she managed to say._

_Killian lifted his head. He looked at her in an amusing way, making the adorable crinkle between his eyebrows appear._

"_This is not the surprise" – he said hoarsely, capturing her lips with his again._

_Emma could feel him smirking against her lips, causing her to smile as well. Killian could feel Emma's tongue seeking immediate entrance, forcing his mouth to open. He groaned as the kiss deepened and his hand grasped at her waist with hunger._

_Emma started to unbutton his shirt, feeling his hot skin under her hands. Killian reached the bottom of her shirt and Emma lifted her arms, allowing him to take off her shirt._

_Killian's eyes widened as he looked at Emma's figure. She was wearing a blue lace bra and he immediately noticed the changes in her body. Killian pushed down her shoulders one blue strap and then the other, slowly, as Emma placed kisses along his throat. His hand reached behind her back and unfastened her bra._

_Emma looked straight into his blazing blue eyes. Killian's hair was all messy, making him look younger. She caressed his cheek gently, tracing the scar on his cheek with her fingers as he carried her upstairs._

_Once in their bedroom Killian laid her down on the bed and admired her spread on the sheets. His eyes were fixed on her round stomach. She was a vision. _

_As soon as they were both completely naked, Killian made his way to the bed. Emma immediately wrapped her legs around his torso. He placed his hand on her stomach, caressing it tenderly. _

_They had never discussed it but Killian knew that the baby that was growing inside of Emma was the product of true love. They never had the chance to break any curse with a true love kiss but he knew that Emma was his true love. How else could he explain that he had found her after three hundred years? People aren't supposed to live that long but he did ... he did it so he could find her._

_Emma could feel Killian's hips nestled firmly between her legs. He rested his sweaty forehead against hers as they found their rhythm. Emma laced her fingers into his hair, pressing his face into her neck as the sounds of moans invaded the room._

_Minutes later Killian gently pulled out of her and rolled onto the other side of the bed, wrapping his good arm around Emma's belly, bringing her body against his._

"_What about the surprise?" – Emma mumbled as Killian covered them both with the sheets._

"_Tomorrow" – he murmured before he kissed her forehead._

_Emma closed her eyes and cuddled closer to his body. Their legs were tangled beneath the covers and the last thing Killian saw before he fell asleep was Emma's smile gracing her lips._

"The wedding is already next month so there is no way that Regina will let Emma escape until they find her a dress" – Robin's voice brought Killian back to the present.

"Do you really think that we're going to turn this room into a nursery in a day?" – David said, entering in the room.

"We have to!" – Killian immediately said –"We have everything we need" – he added, looking at the boxes scattered all over the room.

The men started to unpack the boxes and David couldn't help but remember the time he tried to put Neal's crib together. It took Emma and him hours to build it.

Killian had bought light blue paint for the walls. They didn't know if the baby was a boy or a girl but Emma had said, on one of their many conversations about the baby, that light blue would look nice on the walls because it reminded her of the sea; even if the baby was a girl she would like the color so Killian had bought the color of the sea. He also asked Regina to do a little spell so the paint could dry quickly.

Killian opened one of the boxes and saw the baby clothes and toys that Mary Margaret and Regina had offered them.

David had helped him choose the new furniture. He also bought a lot of shelves since Belle had offered them a box full of books.

"Anton said that the beans are growing fast" – David said as he opened the paint bucket – "He said that in a few months we will have enough beans to travel to any realm we want to"

"They're still under the protection spell, right?" – Killian asked

"Of course" – David said – "Don't worry the beans are safe. Regina used magic to hide the field" – he added.

After Thomas gave Killian the magic bean David thought that maybe they could use it to create more beans. Magic beans were so rare so if they managed to make more they could use them in case of emergency or if they ever decided to return to the Enchanted Forest.

David knew that deep down Mary Margaret still wished to rebuild the castle and the lands that were taken by the Ogres. As much as they loved Storybrooke the Enchanted Forest was there home. They were royals and there was a lot of people that missed the Enchanted Forest; a lot of people was counting on them to lead them back to their home.

The beans could also be used to visit Elsa and Anna since the portal they used to return to Arendele didn't work anymore, besides portals could be tricky sometimes; magic beans were safer and portable.

"Do you miss it?" – Killian asked, looking at his friend.

"Sometimes" – David said after a few seconds – "I miss the possibilities" – he explained – "The Enchanted Forest can offer us a new kind of life"

"The Enchanted Forest is no longer the place we remember" – Killian said, remembering the time they went to the Enchanted Forest after Pan's curse – "The land is no longer fertile … the houses lie in ruins and let's not forget the ogres issue"

"I know that but …" – David took a deep breath before continuing – "but can you imagine what it would be like if we actually made the Enchanted Forest a safe place again? I lost the chance to raise Emma … to teach her how to ride a horse in the royal gardens, to play hide and seek in the castle hallways" – he explained – "I don't want to miss the chance to do all of those things for the second time"

"I understand, Dave" – Killian said, imagining himself doing those exact same thing with his child – "But I'm not so sure if Emma would want to go …"

"Yeah, I know…" – David sighed.

"Would you consider go back without us?" – Killian asked.

"No" – David said, smiling as he realized that Killian would stood by Emma's side no matter her decision – "It wouldn't be a home without family"

"Perhaps one day…" – Killian said. He knew that Henry would love to live in the Enchanted Forest … he wasn't so sure about Emma though but everything was possible – "Don't give up from the dream just yet, Dave" – he added, winking at his friend.

Perhaps in a few years he would see David playing in the castle hallways not only with Neal but also with his grandchildren.

* * *

Will was in the sheriff station trying to do some paperwork. David had asked him to organize the archive since, according to him, there were some loose papers that needed to be arranged in a particular order for easy reference.

After two months of being watched like a child he was finally without a babysitter around. This was his chance to prove that he could spend his shift without a supervisor. This was his chance to prove that he could be a responsible man and finally be taken serious.

He was putting some loose papers into a box when a certain name written on a file caught his attention.

He opened the file and his eyes immediately saw a photo of a beautiful woman.

_Ice maker_ – he read to himself.

Emma had informed him that they kept the register of all the people with magic in town.

He grabbed the picture and looked closely at it. The woman looked familiar. He forced his memory to remember the time or the place he had seen that woman. After a few minutes the sound of the woman's voice invaded his mind and he finally remembered where he had seen her.

"Bloody hell" – he cursed himself, taking his eyes from the photo as he looked at the cell behind him – "She probably thinks I'm a criminal" – he mumbled, remembering the time he had seen the Queen of Arendele.

His eyes found the photo again. She looked beautiful with her long golden braid and her light blue eyes.

Regret surrounded him as he remembered the time he had been locked away in the cell. His hangover had totally blurred his vision that was the only explanation for him not to been able to see her beauty when she was only a few footsteps away from him. He definitely didn't make the best first impression.

He read the file and found out that Elsa had used a portal to return to Arendele; the portal no longer worked.

He couldn't quite explain it why but knowing that Elsa would never return to Storybrooke made him feel sad. He didn't even know the woman and the thought of never seeing her again made his heart ache.

He shook his head trying to control the beating of his heart.

He looked again at the photo. Elsa was smiling. He put the photo back in the file and closed the box before putting it back in the cupboard.

_This was ridiculous_ – he thought – _He didn't even know the woman. How could he miss her?_

He needed to clear his head. He grabbed the sheriff station's keys and opened the door. He needed a Granny's special burger and a coke … with no ice.

* * *

Killian looked around the room unable to hide the smile from his face. The nursery was almost ready. Robin and David were in the kitchen eating a snack and he could hear them discussing baby names.

"David is a good name" – Killian heard David saying and shook his head as he remembered Emma's words: _I'm almost sure that he will try to convince us to name him David_.

This wasn't the first time Killian had heard David suggesting baby names – baby boy names. He didn't understand why everybody kept assuming that the baby was a boy. Emma's constant references to the baby as if it was a boy didn't help either. Despite Killian's efforts to explain that the baby could be a girl, the whole family was convinced that the baby was actually a boy.

"You do know that there is a fifty percent chance that the baby will be a girl, right?" – Robin said.

_Finally some support!_ – Killian said to himself after hearing his friend's words.

Silence invaded the house and Killian could practically imagine the look on David's face. He was probably trying to find a solution for the baby names suggestions.

After a few seconds of silence, David finally spoke:

"Well, if it's a girl they can always name her Davina" – Killian heard David's suggestion and rolled his eyes. His stubbornness never ceased to amuse him.

He approached the baby's crib and touched the small box inside his pocket. He had been thinking about this for quite some time and he had finally reached to a decision. He was going to purpose to Emma. He had waited for the right time and this was it; this was the surprise.

He had imagined a hundred of places to propose to her and he finally decided that this was the right place to do it. Their child's nursery was the perfect place. It represented everything good in his life – in their life: hope, light, happiness, family, love, future …

He grabbed the small box and took it out of the pocket. He opened the box and he immediately saw the blue diamond ring inside. He stared at the ring for a few seconds and them he put the box in the crib, next to the stuffed animal – a stuffed cygnet.

He sat on the floor and grabbed the box full of books. The nursery was almost ready. He just needed to find the right place to put the shelves and finish putting together the rocking chair.

He could already see Emma rocking back and forth in the chair by the window with the baby on her lap. He could already see himself rocking back and forth in the chair by the window with the baby on his lap. He started to imagine himself whispering her about the stars, telling her stories about princesses and magic beans, holding her in his arms in the chair by the window.

The sound of a giggle caught his attention. He turned his head and immediately saw Neal holding one of the many stuffed animals that were scattered over the room.

David had brought him with him after lunch. The boy had been playing with the stuffed animals for hours. He was an easy kid.

Neal looked at him with his big green eyes. He grabbed the teddy bear and walked towards Killian.

The boy sat next to Killian as the pirate unpacked the box full of books.

"Do you want to help me, buddy?" – he asked tenderly.

The boy nodded and grabbed one of the books. Killian smiled. The boy was like a mini David. Killian just hoped that he didn't inherit his parents' stubbornness.

He remembered one of times when David had hurt himself during his shift and refused to go to the hospital. Killian had to call Mary Margaret so David could see reason. He could still hear Mary Margaret's complaints and see the way David pursed his lips together as he heard his wife's protests. As soon as the call ended the prince had looked at him with a murderous look. During that week he gave Killian the silent treatment.

Mary Margaret was also a stubborn person. He remembered when Robin had tried to teach her a new way to shoot arrows and she insisted that her way was better. After that the competition between them increased. Every month they drag the all family to the woods so they could see who the better shooter is.

"_Your family is stubborn as hell, you know that?" – he said to Emma after one of Robin and Snow's shows._

"_That's why you fit in so well" – Emma teased him as she rested her head on his chest._

He remembered Liam and smiled. His brother was also a stubborn one. David reminded him of him.

Killian looked at the blonde boy that was sat next to him and smiled. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad if Neal inherited his parents' stubbornness.

After a few minutes David and Robin found them in a deep conversation.

"Of course I'll teach you everything you need to know about sailing" – Killian enthusiastically said – "We'll have a lot of adventures and we'll drive your daddy absolutely nuts, you'll see" – he added, playing with one of the stuffed animals that were now surrounding them.

David cleared his throat. Killian and Neal looked at him and shared a look.

"I hope I'm not interrupting" – David said, entering in the room.

"Not at all, Dave" – Killian said, smiling – "We were just making plans for the future" – he teased, winking at the boy.

"Of course you were" – David said. Killian noticed that he was carrying a small box – "I forgot to give you this earlier" – he said, opening the box – "Neal doesn't need it anymore and Mary Margaret thought that the baby should have it. It's a family thing"

David gave Killian the crib mobile.

"Emma never had the chance to have it" – he explained.

Killian looked at the little unicorns that were dangling from each spot of the mobile. He remembered Emma telling him about the little unicorns. He knew how important the mobile was for her and her parents even if Emma never had the chance to fall asleep looking at it.

"Thank you, David" – Killian said, taking his eyes from the mobile so he could look at his friend – "I'm sure Emma will love it"

* * *

It was almost sunset when Emma left the store. After spending hours trying all types of dresses Regina finally released her from her torture. She was pretty sure that they had entered in every clothing store of Storybrooke. Regina insisted that Emma needed to try different types of dresses before they reached a decision.

Emma tried to disguise her discomfort. She knew that Regina was just worried about the wedding. She also knew that it was the bridesmaid job to help the bride planning the wedding and she was definitely failing in that department, so the least she could do was keep her mouth closed and try the damn dresses.

The wedding was in the next month and as much as Regina tried to disguise it she was starting to get nervous.

They had bought a long red dress. According to Regina the dress didn't accentuate Emma's stomach.

The dress formed a fitted bodice with princess seams and an apron neckline supported by adjustable spaghetti straps that crisscrossed atop a sultry open back; a billowing maxi skirt cascaded from a fitted waistline into an elegant finale.

Emma was glad that the dress was comfortable. She also liked the fact that the dress was red. It reminded her the time Killian and her attended King Midas's ball.

_It's called a waltz. There's only one rule: pick a partner who knows what he's doing _– she could still hear Killian's words. She would never forget their first dance.

She couldn't wait to get home and take a warm bath, maybe she could convince Killian to join her.

She was walking through the main street when she remembered that Killian had promised her a surprise. She was unable to hide the smile from her face. She was almost sure that she would never get used to his surprises and his constant demonstrations of affection.

"What do you think daddy is planning?" – Emma asked, caressing her round stomach.

Talking with the baby always calmed her. According to Killian's book babies liked to hear the mother's voice. He used to read to her after dinner. Emma had a feeling that he had already bought another book about babies and she couldn't wait for them to read it together.

She had almost reached her bug when a suspicious car caught her attention. She could feel that something wasn't right. A shiver coursed down her spine. She focused her attention on the car and tried to see the driver's face.

A movement on the street made her took her eyes from the car. She turned her body and saw Belle slowly crossing the street. She was holding at least three books. The librarian was also reading a paper.

Emma heard the sound of a car's engine and turned her attention back to the suspicious car. The car was now moving towards Belle.

Emma looked at her friend. She was still distracted with the paper.

Emma almost forgot how to breathe when she finally saw the person who was driving the car.

Without thinking twice Emma started to run towards her friend.

Belle was crossing the street when she heard someone screaming her name.

"Belle!" – she heard again from the other side of the street – "Belle!"

She stopped walking and looked around the street. Her eyes immediately caught Emma. The Savior was running towards her and Belle froze, not knowing why Emma was running in her direction.

She slowly turned her body and saw a car approaching her at high speed. Her eyes widened and she tried to force her body to move but she couldn't. She looked at the car and saw a woman in the driver's seat. The woman looked familiar. The car was only a few feet away. Belle remained frozen and prepared herself for the impact.

Emma reached her at that moment and pushed her away with such strength that all the books that she was carrying fell to the ground as she hit her head on the side walk. She slipped into unconsciousness.

After a few seconds Belle blinked her eyes. She could feel her head hurt. She tried to move her right arm so she could touch her head and she immediately saw the blood on her hands.

Her skirt and her blouse were ripped. Her legs and arms were covered with some scratches and she could feel them starting to sting.

Suddenly she remembered Emma screaming her name and looked around the street. The Savior was a few feet away from her.

Belle was hoping to find her friend only with a few bruises and ripped clothes but nothing prepared her for what she was seeing. Emma was lying on the ground covered with blood. She could see the amount of bruises that covered her body and she started to panic. Emma's eyes were closed and Belle couldn't see any sign of life in her body.

The librarian immediately realized that Emma had pushed her away the moment the car was about to hit her, sacrificing her own health so she could save her life. Emma had been hit by the car because of her. She needed to do something to help her friend.

She crawled to her. When she reached her, Belle noticed the blood flowing from Emma's round stomach and feared the worst.

_No, no, no_ – she said to her herself – _C'mon Emma, open your eyes. You have to open your eyes._

She could feel her eyes watering. Her body started to tremble as she tried to remove the blood from Emma's face.

"You can't be –" – she gulped, unable to finish her sentence.

She could feel her heart beating against her ribcage. She tried to control her breathing but she was starting to get dizzy.

She looked one more time at Emma and then the darkness stole all her strength, making her fall to the ground.

* * *

**I warned you.**


	19. the sacrifice

_Some stories don't have happy endings. Even love stories. Maybe especially love stories_ _―_ Kristin Hannah

* * *

The men were in the kitchen talking enthusiastically. They had finished the nursery just like Killian had predicted. The pirate opened the fridge and grabbed three beers. It was time to celebrate. He put the beers on the kitchen table and sat on the chair next to David. A few minutes later he heard his phone ringing.

He saw Will's name on the screen and rolled his eyes. Will's call could only mean that he had done something stupid. He showed Robin and David his phone and the men rolled their eyes.

"What did you do now, Will?" – Killian asked, pinching the ridge of his nose already prepared for one of Will's big stories.

The way Killian pronounced Will's name made the men smile. They looked at the pirate waiting for his typical snarky comment but Killian remained in silence.

David and Robin watched him as he rose from his chair, hardly keeping his balance. He was pale. David noticed that Killian's right hand was trembling. Before he could ask if something was wrong Killian let the phone fall to the ground.

He looked at David and Robin and opened his mouth but the words refused to get out of his mouth. He could feel the room spinning, making him feel dizzy.

_No, no, no … this can't be happening._

He could still hear Will's words echoing in his mind and his heart beating against his ribcage. He tried to take a step forward and almost stumbled.

"Killian, what happened?" – David asked worried, approaching him. Killian felt David's hand on his shoulder.

He wanted to speak but the words got stuck in his throat. He felt like he couldn't get enough air. It was like he was in a cage.

"E-Emma …" – he managed to say with a tremble in his voice – "She …" – his voice broke.

He could feel an actual physical pain every time Will's words invaded his mind. He took a step forward avoiding David's touch.

"Killian" – David insisted, feeling his heart racing – "What did Will say to you? What happened to my daughter?" – he asked, grabbing Killian's arm and preventing him from pacing around the room.

"A car …" – Killian said at the same time he tried to control his breathing – "A car hit her, Dave" – his voice broke on _Dave_.

For a few seconds David's heart stopped and he almost forgot how to breathe.

"Did he call 911?" – he said, trying to control the amount of emotions that were invading his body.

"He did" – Robin spoke. David turned his attention to Robin and noticed that he was holding Killian's phone – "She's in the hospital. According to some witnesses she was hit by the car as she pushed Belle out of the street"

Before David could speak Killian headed to the hallway. He grabbed his keys and made his way to the front door.

"Killian, wait!" – David said as he saw the pirate reaching the door knob.

"She is in the hospital, David!" – Killian shouted back – "She is in the hospital because of me!" – he snapped his head.

"What are you talking about?" – David asked, walking towards him. Robin followed him.

"Milah did this" – Killian said, tightening his hand around the door knob.

As soon as Robin said that Emma had saved Belle's life he knew that Milah was the one driving the car. She said that she wanted to destroy Rumpelstiltskin. She said that Belle was her target. He should've seen this coming. He could have prevented this. He should have talked to Belle and warned her about Milah instead of following Rumpelstiltskin's orders.

"I shouldn't have listened to the Crocodile" – he continued to say through gritted teeth.

_This is all my fault_ – he said to himself – _She's here because of me. I dragged Milah into our lives and now Emma can be – _he opened the door, trying to erase that thought from his mind. The simple thought of losing her was unbearable.

David asked Robin to take care of Neal and followed Killian.

* * *

Rumpelstiltskin was at the hospital talking with Doctor Whale when he heard noise coming from the hallway. They both got out of the exam room. Rumpelstiltskin immediately saw four nurses yelling things to each other as they guided two stretchers into the hospital. He almost lost his balance when he saw the person that was lying on one of the stretcher.

"Belle?" – he yelled as she watched his wife pass by him.

The nurses continued to run.

"What happened?" – Rumpelstiltskin asked, running alongside the stretcher.

Whale touched his shoulder, pushing Rumple out of the way as the nurses ran towards two double doors.

"You can't come in there" – Whale said.

"She's my wife!" – Rumpelstiltskin exclaimed, grabbing Whale's arm.

"You have to wait here and let me do my job" – Whale said calmly, releasing himself from the Dark One's hold – "She's in good hands here. I promise" – he added before entering in the room.

Rumpelstiltskin remained in silence facing the two double doors. He tried pushing them in, but they wouldn't budge without a key card. He considered using magic to open the door but the magic never left his fingers.

The image of Milah invaded his mind. This was her doing. He was sure of it. He should have been more careful. He should have predicted this – prevented this.

He remembered Belle lying on the stretcher … and Emma.

_Why was Emma injured? Milah needed her alive. Her target was Belle not Emma, at least until the baby is born._

He sat in the waiting room, trying to control his breathing. Belle's image invaded his mind and he tried to remain positive.

Yes her clothes were ripped but she had only some scratches on her body and he was almost sure that she had opened her eyes as soon as he yelled her name. She had survived a bullet, she would survive this too.

Emma's condition on the other hand seemed pretty bad. The Savior was unconscious and covered with blood.

He remembered his talk with Whale before the women entered in the hospital. They had been working on a machine capable of detecting and informing the amount of magic present in a human's body. This machine was capable of determine the percentage of magic that a person could bear. According to Whale the machine was ready.

Rumpelstiltskin also remembered his talk with Killian and the rest of the Charming family.

"_She said that as soon as the heart leaves its body the baby will die" – Killian explained._

"_I didn't find anything about that but it makes sense" – the Dark One said – "The heart usually is the source of power of the most people who are born with magic. I thought that Milah was just going to take away the baby's magic but I guess this explains the sacrifice part that I've read about"_

"The sacrifice part that I've read about" – he repeated to himself as the image of blue blood invaded his mind.

He needed to talk to Whale. It was time for the machine to start working. He needed to confirm his suspicions. This little detail could change everything.

He had read that the prophecy required a sacrifice and he assumed that it was referring to the baby, especially after the pirate told him that the child would die once the heart leaves its body. That was a crucial detail. Ripping a heart wasn't the same thing than crushing a heart but in this case it was. He had thought that that was the sacrifice but now he had a feeling that he was wrong.

Twenty minutes later a nurse informed him that Belle was okay. He followed her in silence.

"I'll give you a few minutes alone" – the nurse said, stopping in front of a closed door.

Rumpelstiltskin watched the nurse walk away down the hallway. He reached the door knob and took a deep breath before opening the door.

He immediately saw Belle turning her head so she could look at him. She smiled as soon as their eyes met.

"Rumple" – she said softly, extending her hand to him.

Rumpelstiltskin approached her, reaching the edge of the bed. He carefully grabbed her small hand.

"I'm sorry" – he softly said, kissing her hand.

"Rumple, you have nothing to be sorry for" – Belle said, caressing his hair – "This wasn't your fault. Caroline –"

"Her name is not Caroline, Belle" – Rumpelstiltskin interrupted her, cursing himself for being so blind. Milah had been near Belle this whole time and he didn't even notice – "Her name is Milah" – he added, closing his eyes.

"Milah?" – Belle asked confused, realizing whom this Milah person was.

"She's alive" – Rumpelstiltskin said – "Bae's mother is alive" – he explained trying to hide the nervousness in his voice.

"I don't understand" – Belle said, running a hand through her hair – "How is that possible?"

Rumpelstiltskin took a deep breath before explaining what he should have explained to Belle months ago. He told her everything: how Milah faked her own death, the linking spell, the prophecy and the _undying spell_.

"I should have told you sooner" – he said, staring at Belle's eyes – "I'm so sorry Belle. I was just trying to protect you"

"Emma …" – Belle suddenly said – "She pushed me away. She saved my life" – she continued to say, remembering Emma's body lying on the ground – "Is she alright?" – she asked with worry.

"I don't know. I didn't talk to Whale yet" – Rumpelstiltskin explained trying to calm her down.

"Rumple you have to help her!" – Belle whined, reaching for his hand –"She saved my life. You have to help them!"

"I know, I know" – Rumpelstiltskin said calmly, caressing Belle's hand – "I will"

"The prophecy … sometimes the same prophecy has different versions with different information" – Belle continued to say, trying to figure it out a way to help her friends – "Please tell me you found a loophole" – she added, looking at her husband.

"I didn't" – he said after a few seconds of silence – "But I think I found something else … about Emma"

* * *

After dropping off Neal at the Charming's loft Robin went home.

Henry and Roland were on the couch watching TV. He made his way to the kitchen. Regina heard his footsteps and turned her body to the kitchen entrance.

"What's wrong?" – she immediately asked, noticing the worried expression on Robin's face.

"Emma is in the hospital" – he said in low voice, sitting on one of the kitchen chairs.

"What?" – Regina said horrified – "What happened? Is she hurt? The baby?" – she asked as she approached Robin, sitting in front of him.

"She was hit by a car" – Robin explained.

"What? No … we spent the whole day trying dresses and then we left the store and –" – Regina babbled, refusing to believe in her fiancé's words.

"After she left the store she saw a car moving towards Belle" – Robin explained, caressing Regina's hand, trying to calm her down – "She pushed Belle out of the street but she wasn't fast enough and the car hit her. Will called 911" – he said – "Killian believes that this was Milah's doing"

Regina clenched her fist, trying to control her nerves.

_If Killian's life wasn't linked to Milah's she would gladly kill her slowly_ – she thought.

"Where's Killian?" – Regina asked after a few seconds of silence, fearing the worst.

"At the hospital" – Robin said – "Don't worry, I don't think he will go after Milah … at least not for now" – he added, reading Regina's thoughts.

"I hope you're right" – she said softly – "Now is not the time to make stupid decisions"

Regina was familiar with Killian's temper. He could be impulsive and reckless. The pirate would completely lose himself without Emma. He wouldn't be Killian without Emma as Emma wouldn't be Emma without Killian. Neither of them would work anymore without the other. Operation _The Three Musketeers_ revealed that truth – Killian was completely lost when Emma disappeared and became the Dark One. They needed each other otherwise they were doomed to fall apart.

They heard the boys laughing in the living room. Regina felt her stomach contracting and then twisting into a knot.

"Henry …" – Regina murmured – "What am I going to say to him?" – she said, running her fingers through her hair.

"Maybe we should wait for any new information about Emma's condition" – Robin suggested – "There's no need to worry the boy before we know for sure what really happened" – he said – "I'll call David to know about Emma"

"You're right" – Regina sighed – "We'll tell him once we find out more about the accident and then we can go to the hospital" – she added, rising from the chair – "She's going to be okay. She's the Savior, right?" – she said like she was talking to herself.

"Of course" – Robin immediately said, approaching his fiancée – "She's strong" – he added, pulling her into his arms. Regina rested her chin on his shoulder – "Don't worry, everything will be alright" – he said, caressing her hair gently.

"I know" – she whispered, trying to believe in her own words.

* * *

As soon as David stopped the truck Killian immediately got out of the car. He entered in the hospital and immediately asked about Emma. Once the receptionist told him the door number of Emma's room he turned his body and made his way to the room, ignoring her protests and her instructions for him to wait in the waiting room.

He was so focused on finding Emma's room that he didn't even notice a nurse by his side, following through the hallway, only when she touched his arm he noticed her presence. The nurse tried to explain to him that he needed to wait for the doctor's orders before he could see Emma. Killian released himself from her hold and continued to search for the room.

After what it felt like an eternity he found the room. He ignored the nurse's complaints and opened the door.

The sight of Emma lying on the hospital bed made him sick. He could feel an actual physical pain in his stomach as he looked at his Emma and the beeping machines around her. The blood drained from his face and his hand started to tremble.

"Sir, she's okay. She's just resting" – the nurse said, following Killian as he moved towards Emma's bed.

"Are you sure?" – he asked without taking his eyes from Emma.

"Yes, we've already ran some tests and –" – the nurse tried to explain.

"Why isn't the doctor here?" – Killian asked. He snapped his head and looked at the nurse, feeling his heart beating against his ribcage.

Emma was injured. She needed a doctor. _Where the bloody hell was Whale?_

"He'll be here in a minute. He's just running some tests and –" – the nurse explained, trying to calm him down.

"She's twenty four weeks and two days pregnant. Is the baby okay?" – Killian suddenly interrupted her.

"Sir –" – the nurse tried to speak as Killian glared at her.

"Did you check the baby?" – Killian insisted – "She's twenty four weeks and two days pregnant"

"We're still waiting for some tests' results but –"

"So you don't know? That's what you're telling me?" – Killian said, raising his voice more than he intended to – "She's twenty four weeks and two days pregnant" – he repeated nervously.

"Babies at this age are very well protected" – the nurse stated, trying to sound confident.

"I know that!" – Killian exclaimed remembering the parenting book that he had bought after finding out about Emma's pregnancy – "But she's twenty four weeks and two days preg –" – he felt someone grabbing his hand, preventing him from finishing his sentence.

He looked at his hand and saw Emma's fingers closed around his wrist, dragging it down to her belly.

He looked again at her beautiful face as she opened her eyes. She had a few bruises on her left cheek and on her arms but other than that she looked fine. The only evidences of the accident were the long wires and beeping machines around her body.

He immediately sat at her side and pulled her into his arms, burying his head in the nick above her shoulder, where her breastbone met her cleavage. The nurse stepped out of the room, giving them some privacy.

"Swan" – he sobbed, feeling the way her back lifted and fell with each breath she took.

"… ry me"

"Don't ever scare me like that again" – he whispered, caressing her hair, trying to stop the trembling of his body.

"… arry me"

He pulled back so he could look at her. He saw her smile and smiled back, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

"Are you okay?" – he asked again – "The baby?" – he said touching her stomach, searching for any sign of injury.

"Killian" – she softly said, cupping his face in her hands so she could catch his attention – "Marry me" – she said, staring at his deep blue eyes.

"What?" – Killian breathed as he looked at the beautiful woman in front of him.

"Marry me" – Emma repeated, tracing the scar on his cheek with her fingers.

_God, how she loved him. _

They had never talked about marriage, it just never came up... but after hearing the worried questions that Killian threw at the nurse she was incapable of controlling her thoughts and words.

_She's twenty four weeks and two days pregnant _– she could still hear Killian's voice and smiled. He was already an overprotective dad.

She wanted to marry him. She never thought that she would want to be a married woman but all that changed when she met him. She loved him; each day she loved him a little more. She wanted to marry him.

"No…" – Killian pouted, removing Emma's hand from his face as he got up from the bed.

"What do you mean _no_?" – Emma said as she watched Killian walking towards the other side of the room – "I'm in a hospital bed Killian, you can't say no" – she added, trying to remain calm.

Killian turned his body to her and Emma released the air she didn't know was trapped in her lungs. He was smiling.

"You're depriving me of a dashing proposal, Swan" – he chuckled, approaching her as he remembered the ring hidden on the crib.

"You're so old fashioned" – Emma said, touching his hand again.

Killian crashed his lips against hers and Emma grabbed the back of his head pulling him closer.

"What about the baby?" – Killian murmured as he rested his forehead against hers – "Is she okay?"

"He's fine" – Emma said as he guided his hand to her stomach – "I know he is. I can feel it" – she added smiling.

Killian looked at her and Emma saw the question in his eyes. She bit her lower lip and nodded.

"She was going to kill Belle" – Emma said softly, remembering the moment she had seen Milah on the driver's seat – "I needed to do something" – she added. She didn't say _I'm the Savior_ but it was there.

Fear and rage invaded Killian's body. He was supposed to be the one doing something to stop Milah, not Emma. He could hear the rushing roar of blood that filled his head. He felt powerless and he hated it. Emma was on a hospital bed because of Milah's lust of power and vengeance.

Emma was looking at him with a worried look.

"I know that you're the Savior, love, but please …" – Killian finally said, regaining his voice – "please be more careful …" – he said, trying not to think about Milah and her threats – "I can't lose you" – he added, unable to hide his emotions in his voice.

Before Emma could reassure him that he wouldn't lose her Whale entered in the room.

"Where the bloody hell where you?" – Killian immediately asked as soon as he saw Whale – "Is she okay? Is the baby okay?"

"Surprisingly yes. They're both fine" – Whale said, peering between a file folder and an anxious Killian.

The way Whale spoke made Emma's liar detector turn on.

He looked at Emma's face and noticed the confuse look on her face.

"It was bad Emma, really bad" – he explained approaching the bed – "I thought you wouldn't going to survive. You were bleeding into your chest cavity. You got contusions and broken ribs that led to respiratory compromise. The chest trauma caused the exsanguination and loss of cardiac pump function" – Whale looked at Killian and noticed that the pirate was pale – "When we were already in the OR your blood started to turn blue and you started to heal … I had never seen anything like that before"

Whale's words started to echo in Emma's mind. Suddenly her eyes widened as she remembered the time when she had cut her hand during the spell that showed her that Killian was alive. The cut in her hand had healed almost immediately. She didn't pay attention to that at the time because she was completely focused on finding Killian but now all started to make sense.

She had also cut her hand when Killian returned, after their little fight in the kitchen. She remembered the plate breaking and the blood flowing from her hand. After she washed her hand the cut was much smaller than before – it was just a scratch.

"It was him … the baby" – Emma said, realizing all the times that the baby had healed her before – "The baby saved me" – she added smiling.

Killian looked at Emma and remembered the prophecy: _the child's heart will have the power of immortality; __**the power to save and cure**__; the power to concede an eternal life._

"It seems that daddy isn't the only survivor in the family" – Emma's voice caught his attention and he smiled at her.

"There's something else you need to know" – a familiar voice made Killian's smile disappear from his face. He turned his head and saw Rumpelstiltskin approaching them – "But before that I want to say thank you for saving Belle" – Rumpelstiltskin said looking at Emma – "I'm in your debt. I'll do whatever I can to help you"

"Is she okay?" – Emma asked.

"She's fine" – Rumpelstiltskin said before turning his attention to Doctor Whale. They shared a look and the doctor spoke:

"Mr. Gold and I created a machine that calculates the amount of magic present in someone's body; the amount of magic that a person can bear" – Whale explained – "After your magical recovery I ran some tests using this new machine. According to our calculations your body will not be able to resist to the amount of magic that the baby will release during childbirth" – he continued to say, feeling the tension in the room – "The energy that you will waste … I don't think that your heart will be strong enough to resist …."

"What does that mean?" – Emma suddenly asked, trying to understand Whale's riddles.

Whale took a deep breath after looking at Killian and Emma. They were waiting for his answer.

"It means that if you have this child there's a very good chance that you will die" – he finally said.

As soon as the words left Whale's mouth Killian's eyes widened in shock. Before he could open his mouth to speak Rumpelstiltskin spoke:

"He's right, dearie" – he said, noticing Killian's reaction to the news – "Do you remember the sacrifice part that I mentioned?" – he asked not waiting for a response – "I thought it was referring to the baby and the heart issue but it wasn't … it was referring to the mother" – he explained turning his attention to a speechless Emma – "For this baby to live you'll have to die"

Suddenly Milah's voice invaded Killian's mind:

_You know, it's kind of ironic because this illusion that you have about this little life of yours is what will make you want to fulfill the prophecy … You may not see it now but I know that when the time comes you will be the one to want to crush the child's heart_ – he remembered her words.

She was not just playing with his mind, she knew about the sacrifice part. _She knew_. She wanted him to blame the child for Emma's death. He didn't understand her words at the time but now it all made sense.

His heart stopped. _Could Milah be right? Could he let himself revert to Hook?_

Unconsciously he looked at his hook. Emma was his light. What would happen once the light was gone? He was starting to wonder if he could trust himself to be Killian without Emma; to be a _father_ without Emma.

How was he supposed to feel about the child that took her away from him?

* * *

**And if you think things can't get worse, think again … So much angst coming!**


	20. the surprise

_Life contains two tragedies. One is not to get your heart's desire; the other is to get it_ _―_ Socrates

* * *

Emma had to spend the night in the hospital, since Whale wanted to know for sure that she was stabilized before she was discharged home.

They had talked a little more about the consequences of Emma's pregnancy.

Whale had suggested that if they inject her with magic more powerful than the baby's maybe she could survive childbirth.

This suggestion was immediately rejected by Rumpelstiltskin since all the evidences showed that there wasn't any magic more powerful than the one running through the baby's veins.

The baby's magic was not an ordinary magic; it was rare. It changed the most basic laws of magic. The child's magic would allow people to live not only forever but also to be immortal; it could heal people – save people. They should have realized that this kind of magic would come with a price.

Rumpelstiltskin also knew that his dark magic was useless. Light magic was more powerful than dark magic. It was like fire and water: you can use water to end a fire but you can't use fire to stop a flood.

Regina's light magic was also no match for the baby's magic, since she was not the product of true love.

Despite Emma's magical recovery her body was still weak and she eventually fell asleep. Killian on the other hand remained awake for the entire night. How could he sleep after knowing that Emma was doomed to die? He always thought that this baby was the product of true love … but now he knew it wasn't. How could it be if it was sentencing Emma to her death?

He spent the night sat in the armchair next to Emma's bed, watching her sleep, making sure that she was alive.

Before falling asleep Emma asked him not to tell her parents about her condition. He tried to protest but after looking at her pleading eyes he nodded.

When David and Mary Margaret entered in the room Emma was already sound asleep.

Mary Margaret started to throw questions at Killian. She wanted to know about Emma's condition. Killian looked at Mary Margaret's eyes and remembered Emma's request. The desperate look on Mary Margaret's face made his heart ache. He took a deep breath and assured Emma's mother that she was alright; that nothing was wrong. He could feel his mouth burning as soon as the words – the lies – left his mouth. Mary Margaret's embrace only made him feel worse for lying to her.

The sight of David caressing Emma's face made him feel guiltier than ever; it made him feel like a villain.

Killian started to feel like he was about to lose control of the situation. Things would only get worse not better. He was glad that Henry was not there. He didn't know if he would be able to lie to the boy.

The next morning Whale released Emma.

The way back home was one of the worst experiences of Killian's long life.

He was driving the yellow bug and mentally thanked David for all the driving lessons. Having a hook for a hand didn't make him the best driver but he tried his best to drive as safe as he could. The last thing they needed was another accident.

Killian felt like he was in a cage and the reason was not his bad driving.

They were driving in utter silence. Emma's head was resting against her window and Killian could see that she was lost in her own thoughts.

Ten minutes later they arrived home. As soon as Emma entered in their house the death silence ended.

"I want to see the surprise" – she said in a low voice.

"Swan, I don't think that's a good idea" – Killian immediately said, regretting the time he had spent turning the spare room into a nursery.

"I want to know what it is" – Emma insisted, climbing the stair, unconsciously moving towards the nursery. She saw the streaks of light coming from the spare room and approached the half opened door.

"Swan …" – Killian tried to say as she stepped into the nursery.

Emma's eyes widened as soon as she entered in the room. She could not believe in what her eyes were seeing. She couldn't have wished for a better surprise. It was perfect.

She looked around the room and noticed the light blue walls. She smiled as she remembered the moment she told Killian about the color of the walls. _Of course he remembered her words_ – she thought.

The nursery was beautiful. She never had the chance to have one; she never had the chance to experience this with Henry and she was glad that now fate allowed her to have this special moment to remember.

She approached the white furniture and saw the baby clothes that Regina and her mother had offered them. She grabbed one of the baby clothes gently at the same time she tried to disguise the trembling in her hand. The baby sleepwear was white since Killian and her didn't know if the baby was a boy or a girl; on the center she could read: _I love mommy_.

A sob wrecked her body as she looked at those words. She bit her lower lip and blinked her eyes trying to hold back the tears that were forming at the corners of her eyes.

The words: _Magic Rocks_ and _Happy Ending_ were written in the other clothes.

She took her eyes from the baby clothes and turned her head to the left. She saw the mobile – her mobile – on the crib.

It felt like an eternity before she spoke:

"When I think about all the time that I thought that maybe it was too soon …" – she managed to say – "… like I couldn't be a mother, like I couldn't handle it"

"Love, this isn't your fault …" – Killian said softly – "You were just afraid …"

"I know, I know…" – Emma said, taking a deep breath before facing Killian – "But I … I can't do it"

Killian moved towards her immediately.

"Swan, the doctor –" – he tried to say.

"I know what he said" – she sighed, closing her eyes for a moment.

"If you have this baby you could die" – Killian insisted, trying to hide the trembling in his voice.

"It doesn't matter…" – Emma said so low that she didn't know if she had spoken at all – "I can't do it" – she said feeling her voice breaking. She left the room before Killian could open his mouth to speak.

Killian remained frozen in the middle of the nursery. After a few seconds he walked towards the nearest wall and punched it.

This was supposed to be one of the happiest days of his life and that room was supposed to be a place full of hope and possibility, not a reminder of what would never be.

* * *

Regina sat next to Robin on the couch, feeling like a huge weight had been lifted from her chest.

Robin was reading a magazine, more specifically a National Geographic magazine.

Regina rested her head on his shoulder.

"I called Emma" – she said – "She's fine. The baby saved her" – she explained, caressing Robin's arm – "Henry is on the phone with her right now"

"I'm glad she's fine" – Robin said, kissing the top of Regina's head – "Is she still in the hospital?"

"No, she's at home" – Regina said – "I was thinking that maybe Henry could spend one more night here. Emma must be exhausted" – she added – "And I'm pretty sure that the pirate didn't sleep the whole night so he must be even more tired than Emma"

"Probably" – Robin agreed, closing the magazine – "What do you think is going to happen next?" – he asked with concern.

"What do you mean?" – Regina asked, lifting her head a bit so she could look at him.

"Milah attacked Belle" – Robin started to explain – "Do you think that Rumpelstiltskin will –"

"I'll make sure that he doesn't do anything" – Regina interrupted him – "And if he didn't tell Belle about Milah already I'll tell her myself" – she continued to say – "She'll not let anything happen to Killian" – she added.

They remained in silence for a few minutes. Regina closed her eyes as Robin caressed her hair. She loved their quiet moments.

"One month" – Robin murmured.

Regina remained with her eyes closed and smiled, imagining herself walking down the aisle towards her true love – her happy ending.

"One month" – she repeated, feeling Robin's lips on her hair.

She took a deep breath as the smell of forest surrounded her. She was going to marry the man who smelled like forest … all she needed to do was wait one more month.

* * *

Killian was on the balcony of their bedroom. His elbows were propped against the white railing and his eyes were stuck on Emma's figure. She was sat near the water looking at the sea.

Killian could still hear Emma's words echoing in his mind: _I can't do it._

The pain in her voice almost made him fall apart. _How could this be happening?_

He had already accepted his fate. He had already accepted that his life would forever be linked to Milah's, that there was nothing that they could do to change that but he couldn't accept Emma's fate. She couldn't die. He didn't accept that. She was supposed to have a long and happy life. She was supposed to see their children grow up. She was supposed to have a second chance to be a mother.

He closed his eyes trying to find a magical solution; a loophole; a way to save her life … but he found none. The only solution was ending the pregnancy.

When he opened his eyes Emma was no longer on the beach. He made his way towards the sliding door and entered in their room.

The sound of footsteps caught his attention. He followed the sound and saw the nursery door opened. He immediately saw Emma's back. She was in front of the crib, touching one of the little unicorns that were dangling from each spot of the mobile. Killian couldn't see her face but he knew that her bottom lip was trembling and that she was trying to keep herself together.

He hated seeing her like this. He would gladly cut his other hand if that meant the end of her suffering.

He needed to do something. They were a team. He couldn't lose her. He couldn't imagine his life without her. He didn't want to imagine his life without her. Whale and Rumpelstiltskin were right … there was only one solution, he said to himself as he walked towards her.

"Love…" – Killian breathed, wrapping his arms around her waist. Emma remained in silence as Killian kissed her hair – "We don't have to make this decision now, we can take a couple of days before we go back in" – he said softly, feeling his heart aching.

Emma's body tensed.

"For an abortion" – she said gruffly.

Killian closed his eyes trying to control his nerves. She hadn't changed her mind.

"That is not what Whale called it" – he said through gritted teeth, releasing Emma from his embrace and remembering Whale's speech about termination of pregnancy.

He ran his hand through his hair as he walked towards the other side of the room. He knew that this conversation wouldn't going to be easy but he had to do something. He couldn't lose her. He wouldn't.

"That's what it is Killian!" – Emma exclaimed, turning her body to him. Killian immediately saw the amount of sadness and pain that was plaguing her face – "And I'm not going to do it" – she added with a trembling voice.

Killian clenched his hand. He didn't know what to say to make her change her mind. He was feeling completely hopeless. He was afraid. He couldn't imagine his life without her. He wouldn't be able to live that life. He was afraid of the man he would become once Emma was gone. He was afraid of himself. He was not strong enough to take care of another human being alone.

Milah's words invaded his mind again: _When the time comes you will be the one to want to crush the child's heart_.

He was starting to believe in her words. He would become a monster without Emma. He was cursed.

He was not made to be a father. His child would hate him like he had hated his father. He was dooming his child to a life without a mother and with a bad father. He was dooming his child to the same life he once had.

"Swan …" – he tried to find the right words to say.

"I already made my decision, Killian" – Emma immediately said. She wouldn't let him change her mind. She was doing the right thing – "I'm giving our child his best chance" – she added, trying to make him understand her decision.

"No, _Emma_, you're not!" – Killian said, running a frustrated hand across his face – "Stop being selfish!" – he yelled, feeling desperate.

"Excuse me? I'm being selfish?" – Emma was taken aback by Killian's words. She felt her heart drop inside her chest at the way Killian pronounced her name instead of the usual term of endearment.

"Yes, yes you are! You're always saying that we're a team and now …" – Killian said unable to disguise his emotions – "… now you're deciding this alone. You're deciding to leave me…" – he could hear his own voice breaking – "… to leave Henry"

Emma felt her eyes watering and her body starting to tremble.

She didn't want to leave them. Why couldn't he understand that?

"Killian, you have to under –" – she tried to say, feeling her bottom lip trembling.

"No, don't!" – Killian exclaimed, raising his arm – "You want me to be the bad guy? Fine, I'll be the bad guy, I'll be the _villain_, Emma" – he said harshly – "If continuing with this pregnancy means I lose you then we end it"

"It's not an _it_!" – Emma said walking towards him, doing her best to fight back the tears – "It's our baby. It's _Liam_" – she added, smiling.

"Liam is dead, Emma!" – Killian said taking a step back, avoiding Emma's touch – "And I'm not going to let that happen to you too" – he insisted.

"So you get to decide whether I should live or die but when it comes to decide about _your _life I'm supposed to sit down on the couch and do nothing?" – she shouted back, remembering all the times that Killian tried to dissuade her from searching a way to unlink him from Milah.

"It's different and you know it" – he said glaring at Emma – "There isn't any unlinking spell. There's nothing you can do about it"

Emma closed her eyes for a second before moving towards him.

"Killian, you heard his heartbeat …" – Emma softly said, grabbing his arms – "You saw his tiny fingers and –" – she tried to explain.

"Emma, stop it…" – Killian murmured. He closed his eyes, trying not to get affected by Emma's words.

"No, I'm not going to stop and I want you to think about it, okay?" – she pleaded, making Killian open his eyes. The sight of Emma's sad eyes was like a knife through his heart – "Please, Killian"

"Love … we can find another way … we can adopt" – he said tenderly, touching her face with his good hand, trying to diminish Emma's pain – "We can be different from your foster families. We can give him or her a chance to be happy; a chance to have a family" – he added, forcing a smile – "I promise you that this child will never feel abandoned or unloved"

Emma touched Killian's hand and smiled. She could feel the tears running down her cheeks. Killian's words made her love him even more. She rested her forehead against his and tried to control her breathing.

"I know, I know and I love you for that but … this little life inside of me it's a part of you and a part of me" – Emma said, moving her head so she could look at him – "I want him to have your deep blue eyes and your dark hair and –" – she tried to explain, remembering her dreams about the baby.

"I don't need her to look like me. I don't care about that" – Killian interrupted her, gritting his teeth together in frustration – "I care about this child growing up without a mother" – he said looking right into Emma's eyes as he removed his hand from her face – "Look what it did to you"

Killian's last words were like a punch in her stomach, hitting her so hard she thought she would crumble. Emma remained in silence for a few seconds, unable to speak.

Killian knew that using that card would open old scars. He hated himself for being the cause of Emma's suffering but this was his last chance to convince her to stop her suicide. He had to do it.

"You're really trying to guilt me into this" – Emma finally said, regaining her voice.

"Aye" – Killian said without batting an eye – "And that's exactly what I'm going to do if in the end it keeps you alive" – he added before leaving the room.

Emma stood in silence, feeling the tears running down her cheeks. She could hear Killian slamming the front door, leaving her alone at home.

She approached the crib and took a deep breath trying to control her nerves. She looked at the stuffed cygnet in the crib and saw the little box next to it.

* * *

Killian was at the docks. He needed some fresh air. He had lashed out and now Emma's sad face kept haunting him as he tried to control his nerves. He knew he had hurt her and that she probably wouldn't forgive him for saying those words to her but he didn't care. She could hate him all she wanted to if that meant that she would be alive. Better to have a broken heart than to be dead, right?

He was pacing when a shadow caught his attention. Before Milah could say a word Killian had her up against the wall of the boat house, his hook pointed straight at her throat.

"You knew!" – he growled, looking directly at Milah's eyes. The woman remained calm, staring at Killian – "That's why you said that I would …" – his voice broke as he remembered her words about his child.

"Yes" – Milah simply said – "The sacrifice will release you from the spell you're under. It will let you see things clearly" – she added.

Killian shook his head, trying not to be affected by Milah's words. He couldn't let himself succumb to her words – her predictions.

"I'm going to kill you" – he said hoarsely, his face only a few inches from hers.

Milah smiled.

"Killing me doesn't change the fact that _she_ will die" – she said, making Killian clench his jaw. His arm started to tremble – "So in my perspective if you kill me I die, you die and the world gains another orphan. Does that sound like a good plan to you?" – she mocked.

Killian tensed as a memory invaded his mind:

_You don't want to abandon him the way you were abandoned _– he said as Emma and he climbed the beanstalk.

_Was I? – _Emma asked.

_I spent many years in Neverland – home of the Lost Boys. They all share the same look in their eyes… The look you get when you've been left alone – _he said.

_Yeah, well, my world ain't Neverland –_ Emma retorted.

_But an orphan's an orphan – _he stated.

His child would be an orphan. It would be alone like Emma and he had been during almost all their lives. He felt his heart aching. He couldn't let that happen. This child didn't deserve that. This child deserved to be loved; to have a family.

"Fulfilling the prophecy is the only good plan – the _only_ plan, Killian" – Milah's voice interrupted his thoughts – "We'll have eternity … you'll have all the time in the world to forget this town and these people. Soon this life of yours will be erased from your mind. Your actions before the prophecy won't matter" – she explained.

She was trying to convince him to join her in her twisted plan but her words were having the opposite effect. Her words were only increasing his desire to protect his child.

"Sometimes you have to crush a heart so yours can beat forever" – she said with a mischievous smile before disappearing in a dark smoke.

He didn't need forever or immortality. He wanted to grow old with Emma by his side. He wanted to see their children grow up. He wanted to tell them about their adventures and travel between realms with them by his side.

He didn't want to crush a heart, he wanted to protect two.

* * *

Emma was on the couch looking at the small box in her hands. _He was going to propose_.

Surprisingly the image of Killian asking her the big question didn't make her feel nervous, it made her smile.

She remembered the time Walsh had asked her to marry him. She had panicked; she had ran; she had felt like she was in a cage. This time it was different. This time she was calm. This time she was in love. This time she was ready.

She wanted to open the box and see the ring but somehow she forced her hand to stop moving. She had already deprived him of a dashing proposal. She wouldn't going to open that box without him.

The sound of someone knocking on the door interrupted her thoughts.

Emma hid the box inside the pocket of her jacket and walked towards the door.

"Robin" – Emma said as soon as she opened the door.

"Hi!" – Robin said, smiling at her – "I'm happy to see that you're alright"

Emma smiled, hand coming out to guide him to inside the house.

"Did something happen? Is Henry okay?" – she asked, closing the door – "Is Killian okay?" – she added, starting to get anxious.

"No, nothing happened" – Robin said, trying to calm Emma – "Regina made her special lasagna" – he explained. Emma looked at Robin's hands and noticed the container that he was holding – "She's helping Henry with a school project so she sent me here instead" – he added, extending the container to Emma.

"Thanks" – she smiled, grabbing the container.

Emma made her way to the kitchen and put the lasagna on the counter.

"So, where's Killian?" – Robin asked, following her.

Emma bit her bottom lip and Robin realized that something was wrong. Killian would never leave Emma alone after all that happened.

"I don't know" – Emma sighed – "We had a little disagreement" – she explained, remembering their fight.

"Do you want to talk about it?" – Robin asked softly, meeting Emma's eyes.

She looked at him, trying to decide what to do. Maybe she should accept his offer. She didn't have much experience in sharing feelings with people but Robin's question sound sincere. She knew she could trust him.

"Yeah" – she murmured after a few seconds of silence – "Couch?" – she asked.

"Couch" – Robin repeated.

They made their way to the living room and sat on the couch.

"I'm not going to ask you to keep this from Regina …" – Emma started to say – "But please don't tell my parents and Henry. I don't want them to worry" – she said, trying to hide the trembling in her voice.

"Now you're worrying me" – Robin said, noticing the worried look on Emma's face. He remembered his conversation with Regina: _What do you think is going to happen next –_ "I thought that everything was fine. Regina said that the baby saved you" – he said, trying to understand what was making Emma anxious.

"He did" – Emma said with a small smile, feeling her eyes watering – "Do you remember when I told the whole family that I was pregnant and Rumpelstiltskin showed up and explained the _undying spell_?" – she explained, feeling her whole body trembling – "He also said that the prophecy required a sacrifice" – she swallowed.

"The baby will die if the heart leaves its body" – Robin spoke. He remembered reading some pages about the prophecy since Regina had been doing some research about it.

"No …" – Emma said so low that she wasn't sure she had spoken at all – "I mean … that part is true but _that_ is not the sacrifice" – her voice stronger – "The baby's magic … it's too strong … Whale said that there's a very good chance that I'll die during childbirth"

"What?" – Robin breathed, trying to process Emma's words – "There must be something that we can do to prevent that, right? Regina has magic and –"

"It won't work" – Emma said, shaking her head – "Whale said that the only solution is to end this pregnancy but I can't do it … I can't…" – her voice broke on_ can't_ as she felt the tears rolling down her cheek – "And _he_ doesn't understand that. Why can't _he_ just understand?" – Emma said, regaining her voice.

_I have yet to see you fail_ – she remembered Killian's words when they were in Neverland.

_You're the Savior, Swan. You can do it_ – she remembered Killian's words when they traveled through time.

"He's the one who never gives up" – she continued to say – "He's the one who always believes and –"

"He's scared" – Robin interrupted her, grabbing Emma's trembling hands – "Did he ever tell you about the time that you were gone after you became the Dark One?" – he asked softly. Emma remained in silence with a confuse look on her face – "He went off the rails" – he explained.

"What about Operation _The Three Musketeers_?" – she asked, cleaning some tears from her face.

Henry used to talk about that sometimes and Regina even joked about the code name so Emma always assumed that they had shared some good moments together; she always assumed that Operation _The Three Musketeers_ meant friendship and family, not Killian going off the rails.

"Operation _The Three Musketeers_" – Robin repeated smiling, remembering the few good moments during Emma's absence – "We had some good moments but most of the time Killian was so desperate to find you that I thought that he would let himself revert to Hook again"

"He never told me about that" – she muttered.

"He probably didn't want to remember the bad moments…" – Robin said – "And now, knowing that he'll have to go through all of that again; to relive that … he's afraid to lose you again" – he explained.

"And I'm afraid to lose him" – Emma said, feeling the tears rolling down her cheeks again.

Robin pulled her into his arms and Emma hugged him back, surprisingly glad for the comfort. Robin felt Emma's tears staining his shirt and her body trembling against his chest. He caressed her hair, trying to calm her down.

"Did you know about the ring?" – Emma asked, increasing her sobs.

"That's why he planned the boat trip" – Robin gently said, realizing that Emma was talking about the proposal – "He wanted David's blessing to marry you" – he added, stroking her hair.

"He's so old fashioned" – Emma said with a nervous laughter.

"You know what I think?" – Robin said as Emma lifted her head so she could look at him – "I think you're going to be okay. Love is strength, not weakness"

"Thank you" – she said softly.

After making sure that Emma was okay Robin kissed her cheek and left the house. Emma remained on the couch. Robin's words actually helped her to relax a bit.

A few minutes later she started to yawn and she defiantly forced her eyes to remain open. Her lashes fluttered as she lost her battle and gave into sleep. She was exhausted. She needed to sleep.

When she woke up the last sun rays had almost disappeared over the horizon. She blinked her eyes and looked at the big wall made of glass that allowed her to see the beach and the waves crashing down on the sand. She noticed the blanket covering her body and realized that Killian was home. She rose from the couch and started looking for him.

She found him in the nursery. He was sat on the floor, next to the rocking chair and a dozen stuffed animals.

"I found the ring" – she said softly from the doorway, touching the little box inside her jacket pocket.

He turned his head so he could meet her gaze. The way Emma was looking at him made his heart beat faster. She was looking at him with such love that he couldn't help but smile back.

"You're depriving me of a dashing proposal, _again_" – he joked, rising from the floor.

"Well, you didn't answer my question the first time" – she said, approaching him.

Emma saw Killian's smile disappear from his face, realizing that he was reliving the moment when Whale informed them about the consequences of her pregnancy.

She found his cold hand and linked her fingers with his.

"I can't stop thinking about how my life will be like if something happens to you …" – Killian started to say shakily – "I can't, I can't live that life, I can't…" – his voice broke and Emma caressed his hand with her thumb – "I followed you to the past, I followed you to New York, I followed you to Neverland, I followed you to Camelot … and now, now I can't follow you –"

"Don't think like that …" – Emma interrupted him, throwing her arms around his neck. He immediately buried his head in the nick above her shoulder – "Will you just please look at all the stuff you and I have survived together?" – she said, trying to stifle a small laugh – "Peter Pan, flying monkeys, time travel, the Dark One curse, memory loss, the Wicked Witch …" – she explained, remembering some of their adventures – "Are we really going to let some prophecy and Frankenstein lay odds on us?" – she added, pulling back so she could look at him.

"Swan …" – he murmured, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear as Emma took a deep breath.

"And even if something does happen to me you're going to be okay" – Emma continued to say – "I know that you can raise this baby … you'll never be on your own. You have my parents, Regina and Robin, Belle … Henry" – she smiled after saying her son's name.

"And how am I supposed to feel about the child that took you away from me?" – Killian said in low voice, avoiding eye contact as he admitted his deepest fear.

_What if he couldn't love this child? What if he became the monster he once was?_

"What? I don't worry about that for a second because you are not _that_ person" – Emma said, cupping his face in her hands, making him meet her eyes – "You're not your father. You're a good person, Killian" – she added, caressing his face tenderly – "And you already are a great father" – she said like she was hearing his thoughts – "You love Henry and you love this child, nothing will ever change that. Your love will only grow"

"I can't be _me_ without _you_" – Killian said, after a few seconds of silence. His eyes were a watery blue. He looked completely broken.

Emma felt her eyes watering and remembered Robin's words: _He went off the rails. I thought that he would let himself revert to Hook again. He's afraid to lose you again._

"You don't have to" – Emma said, doing her best to fight back the tears – "You are always saying how strong I am; how _bloody_ brilliant I am" – she explained, trying to imitate his accent – "So trust me on this … everything is going to be okay. I know it, I can feel it" – she smiled, guiding Killian's hand towards her belly – "We're going to live happily ever after" – she added, not caring if she sounded like Snow White – "All four of us"

"How can you be so certain?" – Killian asked, touching Emma's stomach.

"Because of you" – Emma said, smiling – "Because you never gave up on me; you never gave up on us – on our future" – she added, seeing Killian's eyes shine at her words – "You taught me how to believe and I believe that we are strong enough to survive this" – she added before kissing his lips.

Killian responded to the kiss immediately. Emma was about to deepen the kiss when Killian pulled back.

"Did you feel that?" – he asked. His eyes stuck on her belly where his hand was rested.

"He's kicking hard" – she giggled, feeling the baby kicking

"This is bloody amazing" – Killian said in awe as another kick came in response. It was the first time he felt the baby moving.

He felt Emma's eyes on him and turned his attention to her. He met her gaze and somehow he saw his entire future inside her eyes. His beautiful swan with a little girl sound asleep in her arms. His beautiful swan running after a little girl on the beach. His beautiful swan helping a little girl build a sand castle.

"Marry me" – they said at the same time.

Emma's eyes crinkled at the corners as she saw the broad grin on Killian's face. She grabbed the small box and took it out of her pocket, placing it in Killian's hand.

"Did you open it?" – he asked, looking at the box.

"No" – Emma said softly.

"So how do you know it's a ring?" – Killian asked, smiling at her – "It can be a bean" – he teased.

"Then I'll wear a bean" – Emma said, making Killian arch his eyebrow – "I have magic, remember? I can turn it into a bean ring. I'm not sure if that's really a thing but –"

Killian opened the box, preventing Emma from finishing her sentence. Her eyes widened as she saw the blue diamond ring. She could feel her heart beating against her ribcage. Killian had chosen the perfect ring.

"It's not a bean" – Emma giggled softly as a tear rolled down her cheek.

"Emma Swan, would you make me the happiest man in all the realms?" – Killian asked, kneeling on one knee.

Emma kneeled down so she was at his eye level. She nodded unable to verbalize her emotions.

"Yes?" – he asked, looking at her with an unbelieving grin on his face.

"Yes" – Emma said laughing, staring at his deep blue eyes full of happiness – "Yes" – she repeated.

"I love you" – Killian said, placing the ring on her finger.

"I love you too" – Emma said, closing every inch of space between them, pressing her lips against his.

Killian fell backwards, dragging Emma with him. She was on top of him kissing him passionately and in that moment Killian realized that this was indeed his favorite place in the world – the nursery, a place full of hope and possibility.

* * *

**Killian angst and I are good bedfellows, sorry about that.**

**I got inspired by One Tree Hill. I actually used some lines from episode 17 of season 6 because they were too perfect for me not to use them. Lucas and Peyton fight was so amazing that I definitely had to turn it into a Captain Swan fight scene, hahaha. **

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I really like to know what you all think so don't be shy! Oh, and please read **_**The Three Musketeers**_** fanfiction so you can understand Operation **_**The Three Musketeers**_** that Robin and Emma talked about!**

**Love you guys! (:**


	21. outlaw queen

**I decided to write a light chapter before Robin and Regina's wedding. As you can see by the title this chapter is mainly an Outlaw Queen focused one.**

**Oh, and I also added a quote at the beginning of each chapter, ****I hope you like!**

**Happy reading, dear readers (:**

* * *

_I knew I did from that first moment we met. It was… Not love at first sight exactly, but - familiarity. Like: oh, hello, it's you. It's going to be you __― _Mhairi McFarlane

* * *

**Four weeks later**

Two years ago Regina never thought that she would be in this situation. She was at her house surrounded by women. Emma had surprised her with a bachelorette party. Regina had insisted that it was not a good idea, since Emma's life was literally at risk already but the Savior totally ignored her advices.

The Queen was also worried that her bachelorette party would also be a total failure. She was not exactly the friendliest person in town so she was not sure that the women of Storybrooke would want to be stuck with her for an entire night. Emma and Mary Margaret were the exception but a party with three people wasn't exactly a party, right?

It turned out that Emma and Mary Margaret weren't the only women who decided to celebrate with Regina her last night as a single woman.

Regina was sat on one of the couches, looking around the living room, trying to make sure that she was indeed awake.

Mary Margaret was talking enthusiastically with Kathryn. It seemed that the two women had forgotten about the Dark Curse and were now good friends.

On the other side of the room she could see Ashley, Ruby and Ariel laughing as they drank what seemed to be a gin martini with orange bitters. Emma and Belle were in the kitchen, making popcorn.

"Are you even listening to me?" – a voice startled her. Regina turned her head and saw Tink frowning – "Do I have to use poppy dust and put you in a cave so I can have your attention, again?"

"Funny" – Regina said, narrowing her eyes, remembering their time in Neverland. A lot had changed since then and she was glad that she had won Tink's friendship again.

"Are you getting cold feet?" – Tink teased, making Regina smile.

"Never" – the Queen said – "I've wasted too much time already, don't you think?" – she added, remembering all the times she had ran away from Robin.

"It only took you two curses for you to finally realize that pixie dust never fails" – Tink said, caressing her friend's hands – "I'm glad you found love again, Regina" – she said kindly.

Regina blinked her eyes, trying to compose herself. Lately she had been feeling a little bit emotionally vulnerable.

Emma and Belle returned to the living room. They were carrying two popcorn buckets.

The women sat on the couch so they could watch a movie. They chose _The proposal_.

After laughing and crying they decided to share some stories and eat ice cream. Ariel was the best storyteller. She told them about the realms she had been, the people she had met and some curiosities about the ocean. Emma caught herself wishing that she could be a fish so she could see all the things that Ariel talked about.

"I'm thirsty!" – Ruby declared, approaching the table where the bottle of champagne was –"What do you say we make a toast?" – she asked, starting to fill the cups with champagne.

She handed Emma a glass of champagne but the Savior shook her head.

"Right" – Ruby said as Emma pointed at her round stomach – "Orange juice?"

"One of the downsides of pregnancy" – Emma sighed.

Ruby handed Regina a glass of champagne. The Queen hesitated before grabbing the glass. After the toast Emma noticed that, once again, Regina hesitated before drinking the champagne. Regina tried to disguise it but Emma saw the subtle snap of fingers and the way Regina's champagne changed to what it looked like orange juice.

_Odd_ – Emma thought as she watched her friend drank some of her drink.

As Regina drank her orange juice a memory invaded her mind – the day Robin proposed to her.

"_I brought your favorite" – Regina said, grabbing a bottle of red wine and showing it to Robin._

"_You mean you brought __**your**__ favorite" – Robin teased, after tasting some of the food in the pan._

_Regina approached him and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek._

"_I always forget …" – she said, walking towards the kitchen counter – "Where do we put the opener?" – she asked, starting to open one of the kitchen drawers._

_Robin's eyes widened as soon as he saw what Regina was doing._

"_No, no, no. Not that drawer" – he said and almost let the wooden spoon fall – "Not that one"_

_Regina turned her body to him and arched an eyebrow._

"_Why?" – she asked suspiciously – "Why can't I open this drawer" – she insisted as Robin approached her._

"_Because … I … just …" – Robin tried to find the right words to say but he was already too nervous to give her an explanation – "Just don't open that drawer"_

"_Robin, what are you hiding from me?" – Regina asked, trying to hide her discomfort._

"_Nothing!" – he immediately said – "I just … the opener is not in that drawer"_

"_How do you know that? You don't even know where we keep the cutlery" – Regina stated as Robin ran a frustrated hand across his face._

_The smell of burnt food caught the thief's attention, making him turn his head to the cooker. Regina reached the drawer and opened it. Her eyes widened as soon as she saw the small box. She bit her lip, trying to hide her enthusiasm. She could hear her own heart beating inside her chest, then an idea invaded her mind. She closed the drawer._

"_I'm going to open this drawer" – she stated, catching Robin's attention. He was trying to save their dinner but apparently the universe was conspiring against him._

"_Regina, don't …" – he tried to say, letting the wooden spoon fall into the pan._

_Robin tried to reach her arm but it was too late, Regina was already opening the drawer. He stood in silence with his eyes closed, waiting for Regina's reaction._

"_There's nothing in this drawer" – Regina said, making Robin open his eyes._

"_What?" – he exclaimed, leaning his body so he could inspect the drawer._

_It was empty. The box had disappeared._

_He shook his head, trying to understand what was happening. Why wasn't the box in there? He had hidden it in there. How was this possible?_

"_Yes" – Regina said._

_Robin looked at her confused. She was smiling at him. He looked at her hands and saw the small box._

"_You should have seen your face" – she murmured in his ear._

"_I told you not to open that drawer" – Robin sighed._

"_Sorry" – Regina said, trying to stifle a laugh – "Don't look so grumpy. I said yes"_

"_You didn't let me ask" – Robin pouted._

"_Because you don't even have to ask" – Regina said, caressing his cheek._

"_You stole the ring" – Robin insisted._

"_You can't steal something that's been given to you" – Regina stated. Robin smiled after hearing the same words Regina had told him years ago._

"_Technically I didn't give you the ring" – Robin started to say, making Regina arched an eyebrow – "Yet" – he added._

_Regina brought her hands up to whack him but he grabbed her hands before they could land on his chest. He brought them up to his face and brushed his lips across her knuckles._

"_Marry me" – Robin said._

_Regina smiled and looked at her right hand. Her eyes widened as soon as she saw that the small box had disappeared._

"_You should have seen your face" – he murmured in her ear, repeating the same exact words Regina had used minutes ago._

_He grabbed the small box and took it out of the pocket._

"_How did you …" – Regina started to say – "Of course, you're a pickpocket … maybe I should consider this whole marriage thing …"_

"_I won't allow a change of heart. You already said yes" – Robin said, pulling her closer – "No take backs"_

_Regina took advantage of his proximity and kissed him. Her hands trailed up his arms and encircled his neck. Robin's arms moved around Regina so he could press her body fully against him. She was pinned between the hard kitchen counter and his body._

_Her hands moved from his hair, down his broad shoulders, one moved lower to grab hold of his ass. Robin pulled away from the kiss and looked down into her eyes. He immediately saw a sparkle in her eyes that made his heart beat a little harder against his ribcage._

_He managed to open the box and place the ring on Regina's finger._

_She looked up at him and smiled. Robin reached down and grabbed her thighs before lifting her up. Regina wrapped her legs around his waist and crashed her lips against his. _

_With her securely against him, he carried her up the stairs. Robin moved towards their bedroom, opening the door as he pushed her against it. _

_Their kiss was full of desire and passion. Robin groaned as the kiss deepened._

_Regina backed away a bit, disconnecting their lips. Her hands moved to his shirt and tugged it up, then she flung the shirt into the room. Her lips pressed against the newly exposed skin, marking it gently._

_Robin moved them away from the door and found his way to the bed._

_Hours later, when Robin entered in their bedroom she saw Regina sat on their bed with a huge grin on her face. She was wrapped with the thin, white sheet that left too little for imagination. The Queen couldn't stop looking at her engagement ring. It was a classic halo diamond ring – it was perfect. She remembered Robin's proposal and blushed. It had been so unpredictable. One minute they were in the kitchen cooking and the next …_

_The sound of footsteps caught her attention and she took her eyes from the ring so she could look at the bedroom door. She immediately saw Robin entering in their bedroom, carrying a tray with two glasses of red wine – her favorite. He was shirtless and the dark sweatpants hung low and loose on his hips._

_He approached the bed and sat across from her._

"_I've been trying to think of a way to make this day really memorable and I had an idea" – Regina said._

"_Another idea? What are you going to steal now?" – Robin teased her._

"_Funny" – she said, narrowing her eyes. Robin remained in silence, waiting for her to continue –"What if we don't have sex until we get married?" – Regina finally said with a big smile on her face. Robin's eyes widened – "Do you still love me?" – she added, seeing Robin's reaction._

"_You're joking, right?" – Robin said, trying to stifle a laugh. Regina shook her head and bit her lower lip. She wasn't joking._

_Robin kept looking at her, waiting for her to change her mind but Regina remained in silence. Not even a day had passed since they had sex and now she wanted to stop? That didn't make any sense. How could they not have sex until they get married? _

"_Hmm, okay … " – Robin said, after a few seconds of silence – "But does that means that I can't kiss you like this?" – he hoarsely said, leaning his body so he could kiss the side of her neck. He had to make her change her mind._

"_No…" – Regina managed to say as Robin found a spot behind her right ear and lingered there until her breath grew ragged._

_Regina had to bit her lower lip to stifle a soft gasp as she felt his lips kissing her delicate skin. Robin found the most sensitive spot on her neck and she was incapable of controlling her own body._

"_Okay, maybe we can just start on the no-sex thing tomorrow night" – she said, pushing him backwards on the bed._

Regina finished her drink and then looked at the empty glass, thinking how different things would be if they had, indeed, started the no-sex thing.

* * *

When the dice game paused for a break, Robin headed straight to the bar. He gave his order to the bartender then turned around and surveyed the room. Will had actually managed to throw a normal party at the Rabbit Hole.

Normally Killian should have been the one responsible for throwing his bachelor party but with all that was happening in his life Robin decided to give him a break and let Will be the one in charge.

He had expected a different party but was glad that Will had opted for a simple party with an open bar.

When he turned to retrieve his drink he heard a familiar voice coming from behind him.

"Enjoying your party, mate?" – Will asked, hitting playfully Robin's arm.

"Surprisingly yes" – Robin replied as Will stole his drink – "I'm glad you listened to me for once"

"I tried to hire a couple of stripers, also known as exotic dancers, but once I told them the name of your bride they ran away like I was casting some curse" – Will said, before motioning to the bartender for another drink – "Regina's reputation precedes her" – he mumbled.

"Well, she would probably curse you if you had indeed hired those exotic dancers" – Robin stated as he looked over at Killian who was a couple of bar stools away.

Killian was talking with David and Eric. The pirate and the prince were sharing some stories about their sailing trips while David tried to understand the nautical terms that Killian and Eric kept referring to.

The Merry Men were playing darts and the dwarfs were drinking and playing poker.

"As you can see there's nothing in this party too wild that can piss off Regina" – Will said, rolling his eyes – "Besides I couldn't risk her to call off the wedding with less than twenty four hours to go" – he added – "And I'm a man of the law now, so…"

Will continued to talk but Robin was so focused on his phone that after a few minutes he stopped listening to him.

Just because it was bad luck to see the bride before the wedding, it didn't mean that it was bad luck to text the bride before the wedding, right?

"If you don't stop texting I'll be forced to burry your talking phone" – a familiar voice startled him – "And you know that there's no one better than a pirate at burying treasures, so …" – Killian said, extending his hand to his friend. Robin gave him the phone reluctantly and Killian gestured him to approach the table were some of the men were playing a dice game.

"I'm pretty sure that the dice are loaded" – Robin said, looking at Killian – "That's why you keep winning"

"What?" – David exclaimed, startling both Killian and Robin – "You're cheating?" – the prince asked, making the men look at him.

"You're supposed to be at the game table" – Killian said.

"You're cheating" – David said, narrowing his eyes. This time it wasn't a question.

"Well, it's your fault" – Killian said, realizing that there was no point in lying – "You should know better than to play a dice game with a pirate"

"He has a point" – Robin murmured.

"Says the_ thief_" – David protested, crossing his arms over his chest. Before Robin could open his mouth David spoke again – "We're playing cards now" – he said, walking towards the game table.

Killian watched Robin following David, then he looked at the phone on his hand.

"Stop texting your fiancé. He's in a middle of an important cards game. David"

Killian smirked after sending the text. Not even a minute later Robin's phone received a new message.

"Give Robin back the phone and go get the regular dice, KILLIAN" – Regina replied.

Killian shook his head. How did she know it was him and not David who sent the message?

A new message appeared on the phone screen.

"NOW, KILLIAN!"

Killian could practically hear Regina yelling those words at him and decided to follow the Queen's orders.

He approached the game table and put the phone next to Robin. The thief looked at the phone and tried to stifle a laugh. A few minutes later a memory invaded his mind:

_She touched her toe to the water, testing the temperature. She lay back in the tub and closed her eyes, picturing in her mind what tomorrow would be like. She stood like this for a few minutes until the sound of someone clearing his throat made her open her eyes. She immediately smiled as her eyes met Robin's._

"_What are you up to?" – Regina asked. Her dark hair was tied back neatly, giving him amply view of her face, the curve of her neck._

"_Just enjoying the view" – Robin said with a tilt of his head, leaning against the doorframe._

_Regina was in the water surrounded by bubbles. She scooped up a bunch of bubbles and blew them into the air, teasing him._

"_There room in there for me?" – Robin asked, walking towards the bathtub. He kneeled beside the tub and kissed her._

"_I thought you'd never ask" – Regina whispered after their kiss._

_Robin entered in the tub still in his clothes, making Regina laugh._

_He sat across from her and traced his hand along her leg under water. Regina shifted closer to him. He locked his arms around her back, bringing her even closer to him so she was sitting on his lap._

_They were so focused on each other that they didn't even notice the water splashing over the edges._

"_I can't believe that the wedding is in less than twenty four hours" – Regina said smiling as she caressed his cheek._

"_I can't believe we're going to be apart for almost twenty four hours" – Robin said._

"_It's bad luck to see the bride before the wedding" – Regina stated._

"_You really believe that?" – Robin asked, arching his eyebrow._

"_Better safe than sorry" – Regina said, placing a kiss on his lips. Before Robin could deepen the kiss she spoke again – "And you need to change those clothes. Killian and David must be on their way to pick you up so …" – Robin leaned his head and placed kisses along her throat. She could feel his hands rubbing gently on her back – "Just because you convinced me to forget about the no-sex thing, doesn't mean that you can convince me to be late to my own bachelorette party" – Regina said, before stepping out of the tub._

_Robin lay back in the tub and watched Regina wrapping herself in a towel._

"_I'll meet you at the altar" – he said._

"_I'll be the one in white" – Regina said, winking at him._

* * *

**I hope you liked this chapter! I love Outlaw Queen and I really wanted to have a chapter focused on Regina and Robin's relationship.**

**Next chapter will be mainly about the wedding and I really think that you guys are going to like it.**

**Thank you so much for reading this story! Share your thoughts with me!**


	22. the wedding

_There is nothing more lovely in life than the union of two people whose love for one another has grown through the years, from the small acorn of passion, into a great rooted tree ―_ Vita Sackville-West

* * *

When Killian made his way down the stairs and entered in the living room Robin was still asleep. The thief had spent the night in Killian and Emma's house, since it was bad luck to see the bride before the wedding. He was sound asleep on the couch so Killian decided to make a quick visit to Emma before the wedding. The Savior had spent the night at Regina's.

He grabbed his keys and made his way to the front door, giving Robin a few more minutes of sleep before the wedding.

Once Killian arrived at Regina's he knocked on the door. He waited a few seconds and no one appeared. He was about to knock on the door with his hook again when, suddenly, the door opened.

He was hoping to see Emma on the other side but there was no one in the hall.

Killian took a step forward and entered in the house. Before he could open his mouth, the door that led to the living room opened violently and Regina appeared.

Killian's eyes widened as soon as he saw Regina.

"You look …" – Killian tried to say as he looked at his friend – "… white" – he managed to say and somehow the sentence sounded like a question.

Regina remained in silence with her hands on her hips.

She was wearing her wedding dress and her black hair was half up and half down. The top half was braided in a crown along the back of her head, the rest of her hair falling down in raven waves. Killian also noticed that tiny crystals shimmered in select locations in Regina's hair.

Regina was wearing a long formal dress silhouette fitted at the bodice with a very full skirt – a wedding ball gown with a 3/4 sleeve floral embroidery bodice and an open back.

"White?" – Regina exclaimed – "What kind of compliment is that?"

"I just … I've never seen you in white before" – Killian said as Regina walked towards him – "But it suits you" – he added, before Regina could start arguing with him.

Regina stopped right in front of him. She looked nervous even if she tried to disguise it. Killian also noticed the way Regina kept shrugging her shoulders but before he could ask what was bothering her she wrapped her arms around his torso and rested her chin on his shoulder.

"I really need a hug" – she murmured.

Killian was taken aback by Regina's action. He was expecting anything but a crushing hug from the Queen. He hugged her back after a few seconds.

"It's not like this is your first wedding" – Killian said softly, trying to cheer up his friend. He felt Regina smiling against his shoulder – "Is everything alright?" – he asked.

"Yeah, I just … I'm just a little bit nervous" – Regina said, releasing Killian from her hug – "Do I look different to you?" – she asked, after a few seconds of silence.

"Definitely" – Killian said.

"Yes, I know …" – Regina said, rolling her eyes – "But do I look _different_?" – she asked, emphasizing the last word. Killian arched his eyebrow, saying without words that he was not following.

Regina closed her eyes and sighed.

_Men_ – she thought – _Why couldn't they understand a simple question? All she wanted to know was if he noticed any difference in her body._

"You look great, Regina" – Killian said, touching her arm gently and interrupting her thoughts.

She was about to say _thank you_ when a disturbed thought invaded her mind.

"Oh – My – God!" – she exclaimed – "What are you doing here? You can't be here!" – she added, grabbing Killian's arm and pushing him out of the room.

Killian shook his head confused. One moment she was hugging him and the next she was dragging him out of the room.

"What do you mean _what am I doing here_?" – he tried to say as they walked through the hallway – "I'm here to see Emma"

"You need to go, _now_" – Regina said, opening the front the door – "You can't be here!"

"Regina …" – Killian tried to say but Regina ignored him.

"It's bad luck to see the bride in her wedding dress before the wedding!" – she continued to say, trying to push Killian out of the door – "You're ruining everything!"

_He was ruining everything?_ – Killian thought. Regina was the one ruining everything. All he wanted to do was to see Emma and Regina was preventing it from happening. She was ruining his chance to see her before the wedding.

"You can't be here!" – Regina insisted – "It's bad luck to see the bride in her wedding dress before the wedding!" – she insisted.

"But I'm not your groom!" – Killian exclaimed. He wanted to see Emma; he needed to see her.

"But you're a groom!" – Regina shouted back.

"What? That doesn't make any sense" – Killian replied.

"I don't care! I'm not risking it!" – Regina said, pushing Killian out of her house and closing the door.

She pressed her forehead against the wood and shut her eyes before turning around and pressing her back against it. She instinctively put her hand over her belly and took a deep breath.

"Do I really have to wear my hair up?" – a familiar voice made her open her eyes – "I want to look as natural as possible"

Regina immediately saw Emma descending the stairs; Belle was right behind her, trying to put some of Emma's golden tresses up.

"We've already talked about this" – Regina retorted, walking towards Emma.

The Queen snapped her fingers, making a chair appear right in front of her. She grabbed Emma's elbows and forced her into the chair so Belle could finish to do her hair.

Emma was about to protest when she felt a kick in her stomach. She immediately put her hand over her abdomen.

"Emma, are you alright?" – Belle said when Emma let out a choked chuckle and shook her head.

"Sorry … the baby is kicking" – Emma said with a broad grin on her face – "I don't think I'll ever get used to it" – she added, feeling the signs of the tiny life inside her. Emma grabbed Belle's hand and guided it to her stomach, then she did the same thing with Regina.

"Wow!" – Belle said in awe – "I've read that women describe the sensation as being like popcorn popping" – she giggled as another kick came in response – "He or she is definitely a pirate"

Emma turned her head and saw Regina looking at her belly with a strange expression on her face. The Queen was paralyzed and her eyes were fixed on Emma's big belly.

After a few seconds of silence, Regina spoke:

"Does it hurt?" – she asked, turning her attention to Emma. The Savior looked at her friend confused – "The kicking, does it hurt?" – Regina explained.

"No, it's just like Belle said. It feels like popcorn popping or butterflies fluttering" – Emma explained, caressing her belly – "You have nothing to worry about" – she murmured, winking at Regina.

* * *

"Where have you been?" – a voice startled Killian as soon as he opened the front door. For a few seconds he thought that he was still at Regina's and that the Queen was, as usually, yelling at him – "You were supposed to wake me up hours ago! I'm the groom. I can't be late!" – Robin exclaimed as Killian walked towards him.

"I was at your place trying to see my fiancée but Regina dragged me out of the house before I could even see her" – Killian explained. He looked at his friend and noticed that he was wearing a tuxedo – "You clean up nice" – he added.

"Not thanks to you" – David said, entering in the living room.

"And not thanks to _you_" – Mary Margaret said before Killian could speak.

She approached Robin and helped him tie his tie.

"I thought you were going to help Emma and Regina with the dresses" – Killian said.

"Belle is already there. I thought I would be more helpful here" – Mary Margaret said as she helped Robin with his coat – "The boys are upstairs. Roland tried to strip out of his clothes before I could even turn my attention to Neal. I managed to stop him before he could get too far. Henry is supervising them" – she explained, making Killian smile.

"I need more coffee!" – a familiar voice caught their attention.

Killian made his way to the kitchen and saw Will seated on one of the chairs; his head was rested on the kitchen table. Killian could also see a mug next to the thief.

"I shouldn't have played that bloody drink game" – Will mumbled.

"And you lost" – Killian said, catching Will's attention.

"Not so loud" – Will said, pressing his hands to his temples.

"I hope you plan on cleaning this up" – Killian said, pointing at the plates and cups scattered all over the kitchen. Will opened his mouth to protest but Killian was faster – "Don't try to deny it, Will. I know it was you" – he added, remembering last night and the noise he heard coming from the kitchen.

Will had practically invited himself to spend the night at Killian's. The pirate had tried to dissuade him but the thief ignored him and collapsed on one of the couches. Later that night he invaded the kitchen and stole all the food in the fridge.

"You sound like Emma" – Will huffed – "Do you have her super power as well?" – he asked.

"I have a task for you" – Killian said, seating on the chair in front of Will.

"The dishes, I know …" – Will started to say.

"I have _another_ task for you" – Killian insisted, making Will arch an eyebrow – "And I think you're going to like it"

"What is it?" – the thief asked suspiciously.

Killian rose from his chair and smiled at Will.

"We'll talk about it later, for now just focus on the dishes" – he said, before leaving the room.

"It better not involve water" – Will replied, remembering the time he had to walk the plank.

Killian smirked as the image of snowflakes invaded his mind.

* * *

Emma looked around the large tent, trying to relax. She approached the removable wall and popped her head in. A gentle breeze caressed her cheeks as she looked at the two other tents that were perched on either side of the rows of chairs. The elegant fabrics draped across the ceilings with crystal chandeliers hanging overhead reminded her of the stories that her parents used to tell her about the balls in the Enchanted Forest. The clearing in the forest was full of people and Emma could feel her heart beating against her ribcage.

She was nervous, not only because she would have to step out of the tent and all eyes would be on her, but also because Killian was nowhere to be seen.

_Where is he?_ – Emma said to herself.

She was expecting to see him before the wedding but the makeup and the hair and the dresses stole all her time to go home and see him.

She looked at her engagement ring and smiled.

"You look stunning, Swan" – a familiar voice breathed into her ear, making her blush.

She opened her mouth but no sound came out of it. Her eyes trailed down to take the tuxedo that fit him perfectly. She looked at his white turn-down collar shirt and noticed that he had gone without a tie, leaving the collar open, so she could see the necklaces he wore peeking out just a little. He looked as handsome as ever.

"Shall we?" – Killian asked, reaching for her left hand. He entwined theirs fingers together, raising their joined hands to his lips and pressing a kiss against her knuckles.

Emma smiled at Killian and tucked her hand into the crook of his elbow.

They walked down the aisle and despite all the eyes being on them, Emma didn't care. She was so focused on the beautiful man next to her and the warmth of his skin against hers that she didn't even notice the way people looked at her big belly and the whispers about her current condition.

Before they part ways Killian rested his hand on her belly and gave Emma a quick kiss on her cheek. Then he made his way to Robin's side.

Emma smiled when she spotted Regina, Henry and Roland. She felt the tears in the corners of her eyes as soon as she saw her son walking down the aisle. When Henry made his way to Killian's side she couldn't help but feel her heart beating against her ribcage at the sight of the two men of her life side by side, looking like real princes; the two most important people of her life looking like father and son.

Emma felt Roland holding her hand and knelt down so she was at his level eye, then she picked him up.

"My tie is choking me, can I take it off?" – Roland asked, making Emma smile.

"You're going to have to wait a little" – Emma said softly – "After your mom and dad cut the cake you can take it off, okay?" – she added, already knowing that Regina would want a lot of pictures before the dinner was served.

The little boy nodded and Emma stroked his hair.

She turned her attention to her parents and smiled when she saw her mother and father smiling as they looked at Regina and Robin. Neal was on Mary Margaret's lap. She whispered something to Neal and pointed at the happy couple that was about to share their vows.

"For a long time I didn't believe that I would ever find love again" – Regina started to say – "I thought that becoming the Evil Queen would fulfil me but I was wrong. Someone once told me that pixie dust doesn't lie … It took me a long time to believe it but Tinkerbell was right" – she continued to say, feeling the tears starting to appear in her eyes – "All it took was you to make my life worth living again. You came into my life at a time when I thought I was never going to see my son again; that I had lost my happy ending forever … but then you saved me from that flying monkey" – she laughed at little at that – "Even when we didn't have our memories I always felt a connection between us. You made me want to be the best version of myself and I promise to stand by your side and to be your partner on whatever crazy adventures that comes our way. I love you, Robin"

Robin was about to lean forward so he could kiss her but then he remembered where they were and that it wasn't the time for the big kiss yet.

"Regina, you stole my heart from the moment I laid eyes on you" – Robin said. Regina's eyes popped wide open – "Even when you tried to choke me in your castle I knew that there was more behind the mask that you insisted on wearing. I fell in love with your snarky comments and your rolling eyes but more importantly I fell in love with the strong and resilient and caring woman that you are" – he explained – "I look at you and I see a second chance; a future. You have made my life infinitely better and I look forward to be your husband. I love you, Regina"

A smile filled both of their eyes. Archie cleared his throat and they managed to glance over at him and then at Emma and Killian. Each handed them the rings.

After slipping the gold band on each other's ring finger, Archie finally said the words that Regina and Robin wanted to hear. There wasn't the slightest bit of hesitation. Their lips came together and for a few seconds it felt like they were the only two people in the world until the applause of those standing near them interrupted their moment. Robin rested his forehead on hers and caressed her cheek.

"Your Majesty" – Robin whispered, extending his arm and drawing a smile on Regina's face.

"Thief" – Regina softly said, linking her arm in his.

Robin chuckled beside her, and she leaned into him in response.

* * *

The line moved forward and Killian stepped up to the bar, ordering himself a glass of dark rum and David a scotch. The pirate glanced over at Emma, watching her pull Roland up onto her lap. He took the opportunity to admire his beautiful princess.

She looked unbelievably stunning. Her red dress reminded him of their adventure in the Past and their first dance at King Midas's ball. His breath stopped for a moment as he saw her open back and how the long dress hugged her round stomach. Despite Emma's protests, Killian loved the way her hair was pulled back loosely at the back of her head and how it allowed him to see her elegant neck.

The sound of a familiar voice pulled his attention away from the table.

"Long time no see" – the woman said, placing a hand on his arm.

"Ariel" – Killian said – "Eric" – he added, looking at the redhead woman and the man next to her.

"I was just telling Ariel about our conversation at Robin's bachelor party" – the prince said. Killian opened his mouth but Ariel was faster.

"I'm sorry for the things I said to you. I was wrong" – the mermaid said, remembering the time when Eric was kidnapped by Black Beard and she asked Killian for his help.

"I should be the one apologizing. I shouldn't have tossed Black Beard overboard" – Killian said – "You helped me find my ship and I didn't help you find Eric. I'm so sorry, Ariel" – he explained – "I'm glad you found him, even without my help"

Ariel smiled at her prince and then she turned her attention back to Killian.

"I had to rescue that awful man to find him" – she explained.

"So, he's alive?" – Killian asked, feeling a wave of relief for knowing that he wasn't responsible for his death.

"Probably" – Ariel said – "I left him on the desert island where he had Eric stashed"

"That way he can no longer hurt anyone" – Eric completed.

Killian looked to where Emma was sat, watching her talk animatedly with her parents. She laughed at something that David said and Killian couldn't help but smile as he took her in. Suddenly a disturbed thought crossed his mind as he imagined Black Beard seeking revenge on him. He saw Roland touching Emma's belly and fear invaded his body. He had a family now, a family that his enemies could use against him.

No one had seen Milah around during the past four weeks and Killian allowed himself to forget about the threat that was already hanging in his life – in his family's life. He didn't want to think about the possibility of another villain coming to town. They had enough problems to deal with already.

"I'm really glad you found Emma. I always knew you were a good man" – the mermaid said, touching Killian's arm and making him turn his attention back to her – "You're going to be a wonderful father" – she added, before linking her arm in Eric's and retreating back to their table.

* * *

After the cake was consumed, Regina and Robin walked hand in hand to perform their first dance as a married couple. Everyone made their way to the dance floor. The candles flickering in mason jars, hanging from the trees, created a romantic atmosphere.

When the music started and Robin was about to lift Regina's arm, so he could spin her in a slow circle, the Queen released her hand from his embrace and took a step back. Robin looked at her confused as he heard the soft murmurs of people talking.

"What's wrong?" – he softly asked, approaching her.

Suddenly she felt too nervous to look at him and looked at her feet instead.

She tried to disguise her discomfort during the entire wedding. She even pretended to drink the glass of champagne after the toast and the cake but now she couldn't pretend anymore. She was feeling more and more nervous. She needed to tell Robin otherwise she was going to explode.

"Regina, please …" – his fingers placed under her chin and his thumb stroking her jaw, making her lift her head and look at him – "What's wrong?" – he asked again.

Regina grabbed his hand and took it off of her face, entwining their fingers together.

She took a step forward, Robin still holding her hand.

"I have something to say" – Regina said, looking at the people that stood on the side of the dance floor. She took a deep breath and turned her attention to Robin again – "I'm pregnant" – she said with a shy smile on her face.

The sound of the applause of the people around them invaded their ears.

"What?" – Robin breathed.

"Do you want me to say it again?" – Regina asked, trying to understand if Robin was happy or mad.

"You're pregnant" – Robin said, unable to hide the emotion from his voice.

"Yes" – Regina said – "I found out yesterday, after I did the test, during the bachelorette party" – she added.

A euphoric grin took over Robin's face. He pressed his lips against hers and Regina could still feel his smile as he kissed her lips.

After everyone congratulated the happy couple the music started again and Robin lifted Regina's arm, spinning her in a slow circle until she faced him. Regina placed one of her hands on Robin's shoulder, while her husband put his hand on her waist, pulling her close.

Robin squeezed her hand and then began to move as she rallied her feet to match his. Regina focused on his eyes and trusted in his lead.

"We're going to have a baby" – Robin said as if he was talking to himself.

A wide smile appeared on Regina's face.

"I think it's going to be a girl" – she whispered, watching as a smile broke out on Robin's face.

* * *

"Do you remember?" – Emma asked as her hands played in the back of Killian's hair.

They were dancing in silence for a few minutes. Emma could feel Killian's hook rested on her waist, pulling her close – closer than what would be consider appropriate.

"Remember what, love?" – he asked, placing a kiss on Emma's shoulder before resting his chin there.

"The first time we danced" – Emma explained, making Killian look at her.

Their noses were only inches away from each other.

"How could I forget?" – Killian said, smiling at Emma as he moved them around the dance floor.

After a few seconds of silence a forceful kick directed itself to Emma's lower abdomen. A light gasp of surprise escaped her mouth and her hand instantly went to the area. Her sudden stop caused David and Mary Margaret to almost bump into them but Killian pulled Emma out of the way at the last minute.

"Emma…" – Killian immediately said with an expression of worry on his face.

"Don't worry, I'm okay" – she said with a watery smile – "He is his father's son" – she added, placing his hand over her belly – "I'm head over heels in love with you. Do you know that?" – Emma said, trying to stifle a laugh and feeling tears coming to her eyes.

"Emma, what's wrong?" – Killian insisted. His expression tightened and Emma could almost see the tension thrumming through his veins.

Emma bit her lower lip, knowing that lying wasn't an option. She was an open book to him.

During the ceremony a disturbed thought invaded her mind. She tried not to think about the prophecy and the consequences of her pregnancy but seeing Robin and Regina exchanging vows and radiating love and happiness made her wish even more doing the same thing with Killian. Emma couldn't help but think that maybe they would never have the chance to have their own wedding.

She was not afraid of dying. She was afraid of never having the chance to see Killian waiting for her at the end of the aisle. She was afraid of never having the chance to dance with Killian on their wedding day. She was afraid of never having the chance to have a real future with Killian.

She never dreamed of fairy tale weddings but seeing Regina and Robin together …

"I was just thinking …" – she started to say – "I know that we agreed to marry after the baby is born but do you think that we…"

"We will" – Killian immediately said like he was reading Emma's mind – "You said everything was going to be okay. You said that, Swan" – he insisted, cupping her face and making her meet his gaze – "You weren't having doubts a month ago. What changed?"

"I don't know… being here, with you, I guess…" – Emma sighed – "I just … why do we have to wait? We can get married before the baby is born…"

"Love …" – Killian tried to say.

"… just in case things don't go the way we planned" – Emma continued to say.

"We're not going to do anything just in case, Emma" – Killian declared – "We are not going to give up on our future. We're going to have this baby and we're going to get married and we're going to see our children grow up. I promise"

Emma pursed her lips and nodded. All she could see in his eyes was the truth. He was giving her hope, like she had giving him hope when they found out about the consequences of her pregnancy. She wrapped her arms around his torso and rested her chin on his shoulder, then she placed a light kiss on the side of his neck.

"I'm head over heels in love with you too, Swan" – Killian whispered, closing his eyes.

Emma could feel Killian's breath on her neck, calming her down. Her eyes landed on Roland and Henry at the table and she couldn't help but smile as she watched her son helping the little boy getting rid of the tie. Before Regina could protest, Roland took off his shoes and ran away from the Queen.

"Are you ready for the test?" – Emma asked softly. Killian followed her gaze and saw Roland running around the dance floor – "Do you think we can handle two kids for two weeks?" – she added.

"Aye, love" – Killian said, smiling – "We can handle anything"

They agreed to take care of Roland during Robin and Regina's honeymoon. The boy couldn't be more excited about it. Killian promised to take him and Henry sailing.

"Roland is a little spitfire" – Emma commented – "And you told him that pirates don't have bed time"

"And they don't" – Killian immediately said.

"Which means that we're going to have a problem" – Emma continued to say, ignoring Killian's comment.

"We're going to be fine, Swan" – Killian said – "Besides, we need to practise" – he added, making Emma chuckle.

"I know, I know…" – Emma said, leaning her head against his shoulder – "With you by my side I don't think there's anything I can't do" – she murmured.

* * *

**Hello dear readers! I'm so sorry for the waiting!**

**About the scene between Ariel, Eric and Killian I'd like you to know that in this story the Ariel and Killian scene from season 4 episode 16 didn't happen, so this was the first time they met after all that happened in the Enchanted Forest.**

**Regina is pregnant! I had that in mind for quite some time. I love Outlaw Queen so this story will be a lot different from the show (I still can't believe they killed Robin!)**

**I hope you liked this chapter! Please share your thoughts with me, I love reading the reviews!**

**Love you guys! (:**


	23. baby talk

**Hello dear readers! I'm so sorry for the waiting! My new fanfic (Howl) stole all my time to write this story but I'm back! The next update won't take this long, I promise!**

**This is very much a filler chapter to get to the good/serious/emotional stuff.**

**Happy reading!**

* * *

_I love that word. Forever. I love that forever doesn't exist, but we have a word for it anyway, and use it all the time. It's beautiful and doomed_ ― Viv Albertine

* * *

**Two weeks later**

The first thing Robin became aware of when he woke up was the missing weigh of Regina's head on his chest. He opened his eyes and sat up to look around the room. He spotted the black dress that he had taken off of her the night before lying on the floor and smiled.

He slipped on his boxers and left the room.

They were staying in a beautiful cottage right in front of a lake. The house was built from a mixture of stone and wood. Its interior was full of rustic charm that made him feel like he was in a farm house. The living room featured an exposed-beam ceiling, a limestone fireplace and hard wood floor.

It was a small house, the opposite of their mansion, but Robin and Regina loved the small and simple house.

Outside was a porch with swing chairs. Behind the house there was only woods for miles and in front of it the serene and peaceful lake. There were no other properties surrounding the lake. The only noises were the birds chirping and the leaves rustling. It was perfect.

Robin entered in the kitchen and saw her immediately.

The sight of Regina wearing only his green shirt made him think that she looked sexier than ever. Her hair was piled messily on top of her head.

He approached her and cleared his throat, catching her attention.

Regina looked over her shoulder and smiled.

"Good morning, husband" – she said.

"Good morning, wife" – Robin said, making Regina giggle.

She held up one of the mugs to him. As soon as Robin swallowed the hot liquid he arched an eyebrow at her.

"Hot cocoa?" – he asked, sitting on the chair across from Regina's – "You hate hot cocoa" – he declared.

"Not anymore" – Regina said – "It seems she is having a particularly strong craving for it today and being the loving mother that I'm it's my job to give it to her" – she explained – "I can't believe I used to dislike this" – she added, closing her eyes and swallowing some of her hot chocolate.

"How do you know it's a girl?" – Robin asked, watching as Regina's lips curled in a satisfied smile.

"I'm a seer" – Regina said, making Robin roll his eyes – "I just know. I can feel it" – she explained, opening her eyes.

"Or maybe you just want it to be a girl" – Robin retorted.

"And what's wrong with that?" – Regina asked, after drinking some of her hot chocolate.

"There's nothing wrong with that" – Robin said, meeting her brown eyes – "I want her too, you know?" – he said softly, smiling at his wife – "Our family already has enough boys" – he continued to say – "Henry, Roland, little Neal …"

"Exactly!" – Regina immediately said – "I love our boys but we need girls" – she added.

"You and Killian finally agree on something" – Robin commented but Regina ignored him.

"We should start thinking of names" – she said, pushing back her chair before standing up.

"Already?" – Robin asked, arching an eyebrow at her.

"Yes and I had an idea" – Regina said, grabbing Robin's hand, making him stand up. She opened the door that led to the porch. The Queen grabbed his shoulders and forced him into the swing chair – "We should choose names starting with _R_" – she finally said, sitting on his lap.

"_R_?" – Robin asked confused.

"Yes, _R_" – Regina repeated – "Your name starts with _R_. My name starts with _R_ and Roland's name starts with _R_" – she explained – "Our princess should have a name starting with _R_ as well"

Robin smiled and caressed her cheek.

"That's actually a good idea" – he said, rubbing his nose against hers in a tender motion.

"I know!" – she giggled.

"So how should we name our little princess?" – Robin said, after a few seconds of silence – "Rachel, Ruth, Rose…" – he added, elaborating a list of names.

"Rebekah" – Regina suddenly said, looking at Robin.

"Rebekah" – Robin repeated, liking the sound of the name on his lips.

"We can call her Bekah, for short" – Regina suggested.

"I like the sound of that" – Robin said, caressing Regina's flat stomach and imagining a small girl named Rebekah jumping into his arms.

* * *

Killian opened the door of his house and took a moment to relax in the peaceful silence that surrounded him. He closed his eyes and leaned heavily against the door as he closed it behind him.

After a few seconds his eyes snapped open, suddenly alert.

The house was quiet, too quiet. Their house was never quiet, especially now that Roland was living with them, until Regina and Robin returned from their honeymoon.

"Emma?" – Killian called as he began searching for any sign of her or the boys.

He made his way up the stairs and called her name again. His calls continued unanswered and he could feel the worry and panic growing in his body.

He walked in the kitchen and saw a small note on the fridge door. A sigh of relief escaped from Killian's lips as soon as he saw the familiar handwriting. He smiled when he saw the word _Beach_ written on the paper.

He opened the door that led to the beach and immediately felt the soft breeze caressing his hair. He removed his shoes from his feet and made his way towards the wooden steps that led straight to the beach.

When his feet touched the warm sand he gazed back at the house.

_Perfect_ – he realized, looking at his home.

He could see the flower garden, the white fence, the wooden swords, the basket full of seashells, the little bike and so many other things that meant home to him.

David and Killian had decided that was about time for Emma to take some time out. The Savior was not pleased when David informed her about their plan.

"_I'm pregnant, not sick!" – she protested – "David, I'm perfectly fine –"_

"_And I want you to stay that way" – David interrupted her. The calm tone of his voice made Emma narrow her eyes._

"_I'm the Sheriff!" – she retorted._

"_And I'm your father" – David said, smiling meekly – "Besides, Killian, Robin and Will agreed so you'll simply have to deal with it I'm afraid" – he added, kissing her forehead._

_The Savior sighed in defeat._

He found Emma sitting on the beach, enjoying the last sun rays. Henry's head was resting on her lap and Killian immediately realized that the boy was sound asleep. Emma's left hand was lying on her big baby bump, while the other was stroking Henry's hair.

Killian kissed the top of her head and Emma opened her eyes. She looked at him with a smile.

"I've missed you" – she said softly, making Killian smile – "How was your day?"

"Good" – he said, sitting behind Emma and putting his arms around her big round belly – "David and I visited Anton and he already has a basket full of beans" – he explained – "How was _your_ day?"

"Good but exhausting" – Emma said, leaning back and snuggling into his chest – "Roland is always running around wanting to do so many things … and then he looks at me with those big brown eyes and I just can't say no" – she added – "Even Henry is exhausted"

"Where's the little thief?" – Killian asked, caressing Henry's hair.

"He's out there" – Emma said, pointing with her hand at the place where Roland was – "Behind that sand castle we built this afternoon" – she explained.

He stood up from the sand and walked towards the boy.

Roland's raven hair was messed up by the soft wind. Killian couldn't help but smile as he watched the way the little boy was looking at the castle. His eyes were focused on the high turret of the castle and his hands were trembling as he tried to put a seashell on the top of it.

"Need my help, lad?" – Killian asked, catching Roland's attention.

"Nope" – the boy said while Killian sat next to him – "Do you like my castle? Aunt Emma helped me build it"

"I do. It looks like a real castle" – Killian gently said and Roland's eyes flashed.

"And we didn't use any magic" – Roland proudly said – "It's a pirate castle" – he added, pointing at the small flag with a skull waving on one of the turrets.

Emma watched as Killian ruffled Roland's hair and smiled. The little boy was showing him the sand castle and they were talking enthusiastically.

After a few minutes Killian grabbed Roland and threw him over his shoulder. A loudly laugh escaped from the little boy's mouth as Killian carried him to the water.

The pirate leapt backwards, pulling Roland with him as they disappeared beneath the calm waters of the ocean.

Emma giggled, imagining Killian doing the same thing with their child. Her laugh disturbed Henry's sleep and the boy opened his eyes.

"Sorry, mom, I guess I fell asleep" – Henry said yawning – "Where's Roland?" – he asked.

"With Killian" – Emma said, pointing at the sea.

"He's back!" – Henry immediately said, standing up from the sand – "Finally!" – he exclaimed, running towards the ocean.

As soon as Henry entered in the ocean, Killian and Roland started to splash water at him.

Emma stared at the beautiful scenery and felt complete, wishing she could stare at that scenery forever.

* * *

Later in the Charming's loft, Killian helped David with the dishes.

Emma was on the couch playing with the boys, while Mary Margaret helped Henry with his homework.

Two hours later Killian, Emma, Henry and Roland entered into the yellow bug and returned home.

When Emma and Killian looked at the backseat they realized that the boys were sound asleep.

"Don't worry. I'll carry them" – Killian said, before opening the car door.

He touched carefully Henry's body, trying not to wake him and carried him to his room. He was about to leave the room when he saw Emma entering in the bedroom, carrying Roland in her arms.

"Swan…" – Killian protested, keeping his voice low, trying not to disturb Roland's sleep – "I told you I would carry them. You need to rest" – he added, grabbing Roland's body and putting him in the small bed next to Henry's (the bed Emma had created using her magic).

"You're so good with them" – Emma said softly, watching Killian pull the sheet up to cover Henry's body.

She approached Roland's bed and put the stuffed monkey next to his face. The boy loved that monkey.

"So are you" – Killian said, approaching her and tucking a strand of hair behind her ear – "I hate that monkey" – he murmured and Emma stifled a laugh.

"It's just a stuffed monkey" – Emma said, caressing his cheek.

"It used to be a flying monkey" – Killian stated – "Regina should have destroyed it, not turned it into a stuffed animal" – he said, looking at the monkey with a distrustful look.

"At least he didn't name him Walsh" – Emma teased him, enjoying the way Killian narrowed his eyes.

She kissed his cheek and Killian smiled. He picked her up, bridal style, and carried her to their bedroom.

Hours passed and, unlike Killian, Emma was still awake. She tried to fall asleep but she couldn't.

A nightmare had disturbed her sleep and she couldn't erase the bad dream from her mind.

She had had this dream before.

In her dream Killian and she were walking through the beach when he suddenly disappears. She searches for him for hours without success until she sees a ship like the Jolly Roger at the sea; the ship was moving away from her and when she looks at the helm of the ship she sees him – Killian is at the helm of the ship, sailing away from her.

She yells his name but he doesn't look at her. She continues to yell as the ship disappears little by little into the sea.

She jumps into the water and starts to swim but when she is almost reaching the ship she feels something grabbing her feet, pushing her underwater.

She had had this dream before but now she couldn't shake the feeling that Milah was the one grabbing her feet and pushing her underwater.

She couldn't help but think that the dream was a warning.

This time she didn't feel like Killian was the one leaving her. He was sailing away from her but she didn't feel like he was leaving her.

Despite her efforts to reach the ship she felt like she was doomed to fail. Every time she tried to reach him she only increased the distance between them. She felt like she was the one leaving him. She didn't want to leave him but it was like she didn't have another choice.

She looked at the man lying next to her, memorizing every line of his face. His dark hair a sharp contrast to the white pillow.

She closed her eyes and pressed a hand to her abdomen. She stood in silence, listening the sound of waves crashing down on the sand.

Emma opened her eyes and looked at her belly, seeing the way the moonlight touched her stomach.

"Please, take very special care of your father…" – she murmured, breaking the silence – "… because if I'm not around... he's going to need you and Henry to take care of him" – she said, feeling her lower lip trembling and doing her best to fight back the tears – "So, love him ... and be kind to him. Do that for me, please" – her voice broke on _please_.

She felt a tear running down her cheek and slid from the bed. She walked towards the sliding door that led to the balcony and opened it, unaware of the sad blue eyes following her every move.

* * *

**I can't believe we already reached chapter 23! We're so close to the big (baby) moment and I'm planning so many twists! Fasten your seat belt!**

**Thank you for reading and please review! I really appreciate all your kind words!**

**Love you guys! (:**


End file.
